Garnet

By the time the sun had come out, Harry had been lying on his bed for hours.

He was tired so tired.

He felt like he was dead on his feet. Nothing he could do but wait for it to brush past. Or not. What if it never went away? What if he felt like this forever? What if he died alone in this house without anyone to remember him? Isn't that what he wants? To be forgotten and be left alone by everyone?

It is.

It isn't.

Harry didn't think he could get up even if he tried, but he needed to. He had responsibilities now, like checking what Snape had done to his house and getting Arie food.

But he couldn't get up, he couldn't move, couldn't think because everything hurt and his head felt heavy, he felt helpless to do anything but stare at the door to his room.

He felt apathy washing over him in waves leaving only anger and sadness.

It felt right, it was something he had long been acquainted with, and knew what to expect.

Harry had never been to the beach before but the room he now stays in smelt faintly of salty water and caves.

It was nice, and calming like a memory he couldn't remember trying to resurface.

He couldn't help but wonder what would it feel like to drown. Just go underwater and never come up again. The sound of the world drowned away, being unable to think of anything else besides the water slowly filling his lungs. The breaths he would never be able to take again.

But what's the point?

He could just stay in this room for the rest of his life and all his problems would be gone.

But he had Arie so he couldn't do that anymore.

He had to do it for her since she didn't deserve to starve like him.

She hadn't done anything wrong.

She was untainted.

Unruined.

Unlike him who was too far gone to be saved.

If he was forced to go back to Hogwarts in a week and a half, he could find someone to give her to and then he would be free to end it there.

Someone was bound to take her, or he could pay them to. He had more money than he could even think about spending and she deserved a good home.

She deserved more than he could give her.

What was he thinking buying her?

Or he could give her to Snape if he came back, and then he could find her a new home but who knows what he would do to her so it probably wasn't safe.

She deserved for Harry to stick around enough to find her someone who would lover her, and take better care of her than he ever could.

It would be best if he found someone as soon as possible so she could get on with her new life without him holding her back.

It's only a week and a half till school.

He's lasted this long so what's a week and a half?

__________________________________________

A pretty fucking long time, that's what a week and a half is.

It was now noon and Harry was finally able to drag himself down the stairs with Arie over his shoulders.

He was wearing muggle clothes since he had yet to order any robes that would be suitable for day-to-day wear.

He previously bought muggle clothes that weren't as bad as Dudley's rags he enjoyed wearing. Well enjoyed was a strong word but still. He had charmed them previously with charms that made them grow with him so they all fit as perfectly as the day he bought them.

He was currently in black sweatpants and a grey hoodie which was about as comfortable as he was going to get with his muggle clothes.

On days like this, he couldn't handle the feel of certain clothes. They felt constricting and like he couldn't breathe no matter how many breaths he took.

He still felt like ripping his skin off but it was better.

Sort of.

As he walked into the hall leading to the kitchen he stoped, he heard the sound of something.

What could it be?

There is no way in hell Snape stuck around for the last 12 hours so did someone else get in?

How fucking stupid did Harry have to be to not think about the fact that if Snape had been able to get in who else would be?

Anyone could be in the house and Harry couldn't do anything about it.

Harry drew his wand out once again and pointed it at the figure sitting at the table with the daily profit covering their face and a glass of coffee next to them.

The figure slowly lowered the paper.

Nope.

It fucking Snape again.

Let this be a joke or a hallucination.

Anything but Severus fucking Snape in Harry's kitchen looking content to sit there all day and drink coffee and read the paper.

What the actual fuck had Harry's life become.

Harry could think of many things he has done to deserve awful things but nothing this bad.

He didn't deserve this.

Not even Voldemort or Dumbledore deserved this.

They stood staring at each other because what else was there to do, Snape's eyes were raking over him assessing Merlin's knows what.

Harry has never wished to disappear more than he has at this moment.

Voldemort should have just killed him all those years ago and saved Harry all this pain and suffering. He could have only known a life of loving parents and a house that felt like home. Sure he would have not gotten to live a very long life but one thing Harry found was that it's better to live a short life with no hardships than a long life with joy but also anguish.

Harry turned to leave but found he couldn't.

Fucking brilliant.

There was some kind of clear barrier trapping him in the kitchen with Snape for he to do whatever he wanted to Harry.

__________________________________________

Severus hadn't slept that night in hopes Potter would come back down from wherever he was hiding, and they could talk.

He didn't know what he had done to Potter to get him to react so strangely, but he knew it was something. To cause Potter to run and hide from Severus instead of yelling at him like he had done countless times before Severus must have done something really bad to the boy.

All he had done was touch Potter, nothing more than that.

What had Potter been through to have that much of an aversion to touch?

Potter wasn't Severuses biggest fan but it's not like he had ever hurt the child, just maybe he had been a bit more strict with the boy.

But that didn't warrant this sort of reaction.

But also why was Potter at order headquarters, and why were they all kicked out?

How was Severus able to get into the house but no one else?

Potter may have the answers he is looking for but he was currently locked in a room upstairs if Severus had to guess unable or unwilling to answer questions.

There was nothing for Severus to do but wait for the boy. He had to come out at one point or another so that's exactly what he did, he would wait until school started up again if that's what it took.

It was around noon when Severus heard a door open.

Well, here's to hoping this meeting with Potter will go better than the previous one but knowing Potter he had very low expectations.

Severus was sitting at the kitchen table in hopes of looking as unthreatening as possible to make Potter not immediately leave the room when he saw him. But just to be safe Severus cast a charm to create a barrier that would only let people in and not out around the kitchen entrance so Potter couldn't run if he tried.

The second Potter walked in Severus knew he wouldn't make this conversation easy, but it needed to happen no matter the pair's opinions on each other.

He lowered his newspaper and watched as Potter panicked as he realized he couldn't leave.

He looked like a deer in headlights, so pathetic in fact that Severus decided to pity him and end the already awkward silence.

¨Potter if you cannot calm down I have a calming drought.¨ There that sounded nice and unthreatening right, he offered to help Potter how much nicer could he be?

¨I dont know what you're playing at Snape but I don't want any of your poison. I dont know how you got in here but you don't need to be here so leave.¨

Of course, Potter thought he was trying to poison him, he never did seem to apply himself when identifying potions.

¨Im not poisoning you Potter but if you dont take a breath you're going to pass out¨

Potter closed his eyes for a second, and when he opened them he had a dead uncaring look to them.

Was Potter occluding?

How did Potter know occupancy?

It was unsettling and in all honestly creepy at the level Potter seemed to have mastered the skill.

¨Alright Professor, what do you want from me?¨

He talked in a monotone and respectful voice which was somehow worse than if he was yelling.

At least Severus knew how to respond to children who were yelling at him. Never has he had to deal with a dead, cold stare and lifeless voice Potter was currently using.

¨How about you start explaining why the Order was kicked out of this safehouse and unable to re-enter, and why you are here?¨

¨I dont see why this is any of your concerns sir.¨

¨Potter, stop with the games and tell me why you left your aunt and uncles and now find yourself residing here.¨

¨A dementor came after my cousin and me so I cast a patronous to fend it away, and then I couldn't stay with my relatives and I needed a new place to stay so now I'm here.¨

He didn't know if the boy thought him to be stupid or thought he could get away with telling the bare details, but Severus wanted a real explanation. He knew the boy could cast a patronus and that he was faced with dementors the night before. What he didn't know was why the boy's appearance suddenly changed, and why he was now living here.

¨Potter if you do not elaborate I will look into your mind and figure it out myself, I will give you one last chance to tell me the truth.¨

Severus wouldn't look into the boy's mind since even he had some morals but Potter didn't need to know this, and if this was the only way to get the boy to explain so be it.

Potter suddenly had a spark of anger in his eyes that were now quickly losing their uncaring glazed-over appearance.

¨Snape I know you have never and will never give a shit about me so I don't know how you were even able to get into this house which is mine by the way so thank you for trespassing. My cousin and I were attacked by dementors like I already told you, and I didn't fancy staying at the Dursleys longer so I left and came here since I owned the place. That's all that happened even though it's none of your fucking business anyways but since you insist on sticking your overly large nose into everyone's business remember you asked me to elaborate. You are not my professor anymore because guess what, I'm not going back to Hogwarts to be resorted into your fucking house. I'm sure you know all about that and hell it could have been your idea as a way to ruin my life even more than it has been. Expert, I know better since you would rather gouge your own eyes out than have to see me more than you already do. Now I can talk to you, however, the fuck I want because what are you going to do about it now, put me in detention? Oh wait you can't because you aren't my professor. So now if you would kindly let me out of this room and leave the fucking house and never come back.¨

Severus was shocked. This was more like the Potter he knew but there was so much to unpack based on what the boy had said. Severus had so many more questions than he previously had, and looks like he will have to find the answers on his own since it's not like he could go to Albus.

Severus was even more shocked when the boy walked through his barrier. He custom-made this spell and no one had even been able to walk through or even go near it once they passed through it.

So the question was, why is a 15-year-old boy able to do things grown wizards have tried and failed at more times than Severus could count?