the one who RAN into bombs
The wind shifted. Haruhi blinked. Even though the trees were moving in the wind, she couldn’t feel the breeze on her face. She shook her head, dazed, centre of mass off and she almost stumbled off her podium with the movement.
To either side stood her fellow Oxbridge cohort, each on their own podiums. Everyone else also seemed confused, apart from Ranpo who was smirking, his sharp green eyes glinting behind his glasses. His hair was in artiful disarray on his brow, cap tucked down over his face, jacket unmoving in the breeze - and even though that should have been weird Haruhi couldn’t figure out why…
Overhead, speakers blared: the distinctive voice - velvety smooth, sensual, like slipping into a warm bath after a long day, like entering a heated and well-prepped Pokkle’s pocket - of well-known singer, actor, prankster, international heartthrob, Oxbridge alumni, Shougo Sena of Prank Stage!!
“Ten!” Shougo said clearly.
Sakura shivered in delight at his tone.
“Nine!”
On the floor of each podium - the name of each person’s District in block numbers. Haruhi quickly scanned them, trying to place herself and their situation in her overwhelming confusion. She memorised them all in seconds of course, only those from very smart families were lucky enough to study at the elite university, Oxbridge University. Haruhi had spent months studying for the entrance exams, only to discover that British Universities did not have entrance exams. Still she got in nonetheless, and was a model student, one that everyone respected.
District 1: Osamu Dazai and Nakahara Chuuya, the astrology and singing students respectively.
“Eight!”
District 2: Akutagawa Ryuunosuke and Nakajima Atsushi, astrology students.
“Seven!”
District 3: Vinsmoke Sanji and Roronoa Zoro, astrology; District 4: Naruto Uzamaki and Sasuke Uchiha, literature students.
“Six!”
District 5: Mitsukuni Haninozuka and Takashi Morinozuka - Honey and Mori - astrology students.
“Five!”
District 6: Sakura Haruno and...Haruhi looked down at her feet - so she was in District 6 too...District 7: Tamaki Suoh and Kyoya Ootori, District 8: Kunikida Doppo and Kyouka Izumi - Haruhi was painfully aware of the timer running out, though she wasn’t entirely sure what the timer was for, and tried to scan through everyone else’s Districts quickly.
“Four!”
District 9: Nekozawa Umehito and Hikaru Hitachiin; District 10: Soma Asman Kadar and Kaoru Hitachiin.
“Three!”
District 11: Kenji Miyazawa and - Haruhi looked over at the next person quickly, following their legs upward from the number ‘11’ so she could quickly catalogue them and move onto the next person -
Ranpo winked at Haruhi, clear mirth in his expression. He mock-saluted her, “See you on the other side---” his jovial tone rung across the silence of the arena, taking a wide step off the podium - and Haruhi opened her mouth to scream because that clearly wasn’t a smart idea, that much was obvious, and -
The boom of his body exploding ringing across the stadium, tinnitus ringing in Haruhi’s skull as she slowly looked over, something warm splattering against her face as her eyes widened and she took in the rest of the students -
Muffled; Shougo shouted the final digits into the air, the mud unsettled in plumes across the forest floor -
People dyed red in Ranpo’s blood, especially those in the immediate blast range - Haruhi could barely hear but the slight movement of people stumbling off their podiums in shock was visible in her periphery, and she looked up slowly -
District 12: Tetsuya Sendo and -
She couldn’t hear her own screams but her throat was tense and her tongue stiffened and she must have been screaming - just must have been - because what else - not in the sight of -
Ranpo’s face, hanging off someone else's, the skin flapping under their chin, red trim, eye holes empty and blood pooling out of them - but slickened with blood the face dripped off its body and splatted on the floor at -
Clay Jensen’s feet, his face streaked with Ranpo’s blood, blue eyes stern and cutting against the red and Haruhi could recognise him as the famous School Shooting Stopper Clay Jensen - but why was he with them if he was not a student??
-
Luffy watched on. As a child he was very capable of being Head Gamemaker, a role he took very seriously. He sipped his pina colada, pulling an umbrella out of the drink and throwing it at the floor. Like a dart the stick jammed into his footstool’s back.
Lord Goo, on the floor on all fours, groaned. Umbrella skewered out of his back like acupuncture, but like the black market kind.
On the floor-to-ceiling screen opposite, Luffy watched the contestants finally gather their bearings, shaking off Ranpo’s remnants and running to the cornucopia. They didn’t know why they ran, but something compelled them toward the large structure.
They were met with multiple bookcases, enough to fill an entire library. Sakura picked a book up upside down, puzzlement on her features as she tried to figure out how to read. Kyoya quickly scanned through all of the offerings: Heine Wittgenstein’s works, but just hundreds of copies of the same book considering Heine’s embarrassing body of work. Kyoya sighed, shaking his head; the books were only worth their paper, really, filled with useless information even a TODDLER would know. Especially if the Toddler was the late Ranpo.
Soon everyone else followed after Kyoya into the depths of the forest, realising the texts were absolutely useless, stumbling uselessly as they struggled with their balance - as if the floor was wavy or if they had two left feet. The only person who seemed to be okay with it was Tamaki, so used to being strung out on cocaine that he didn’t understand why everyone else was walking so weirdly??
Kid Luffy cackled, stroking his elbow-length beard, holding up his pina colada in toast.
To the first ever Oxbridge Hunger Games!