Chapter 21
Okay, so admittedly, Barty was hurt.
Regulus had basically dumped him with Dorcas and the McKinnon girl just to be alone with Evan, right after they had sex. Again. Barty wasn’t proud of it, but it happened.
He was now sitting on the beach, listening to Dorcas telling him everything about her vacation while her girlfriend was swimming and laughing with Sirius, who had shown up with Remus an hour before.
Barty hadn’t been listening to Dorcas for a little while now, too distracted by his frustrations. He vaguely heard Remus mutter something to Dorcas from his place in the shade besides her, but he didn’t register the words until Dorcas gave an answer. ‘Nah, he’s just cosplaying Reg with all his mystery sad boy energy.’
‘I’m sorry, what? I’m not!’ Barty exclaimed, giving Dorcas a dirty look before throwing one to Remus. Both of them looked back at him with an ‘I don’t give a fuck’ stare. ‘What were you talking about anyways,’ Barty asked, crossing his arms and trying to steer the conversation away from himself. ‘I stopped talking about my vacation like twenty minutes ago, Barty. We were just starting on the topic of you and all of the issues you’re creating for yourself,’ Dorcas said, lowering her sunglasses to give him a stern look.
Barty scoffed. ‘I’m not creating issues for myself, thank you very much,’ he muttered irritatedly, before Dorcas rolled her eyes. ‘Okay, so you didn’t have sex with Regulus before coming to the beach? Even though you’re jealous of Evan dating James because you’re lowkey in love with Evan? What you tried to prove by punching James, only to punch Evan and break his perfect nose?’ Dorcas asked him, knowing the answer to all of that was yes.
‘Uh… Okay, but what about 2024theplot?’ he said, which earned him another eye roll from Dorcas. ‘That is not a good excuse, Nounours.’
‘Stop calling me that!’ Batty yelled, which earned a snicker from Remus who had dark sunglasses on the top of his head, a book in front of his face. ‘It’s not funny, Lupin. You don’t get to laugh,’ Barty said, pouting and laying down with a dramatic sigh.
‘I can call you Teddy again?’ Dorcas proposed, but Barty firmly shook his head. ‘Osito?’ Barty shook his head again. ‘Orsacchiotto? Nalle? Pelúcia?’ Dorcas was laughing now, finding it seemingly hilarious. ‘Okay, no. Italian is illegal, you know that. And what even are those other two?’ he said, scrunching up his nose. ‘Swedish and Portuguese. I liked them, didn’t you?’ Dorcas said, grinning at him.
‘No I don’t like them. Just call me Barty.’
‘Whatever you want, Bartemius.’
‘Barty.’
‘Bartemius.’
‘Barty.’
‘Bartemius Crouch.’
‘Barty!’
‘Bartemius Crouch Junior.’
‘Ugh!’
Barty rolled his eyes and turned the other way so his back was facing Dorcas. Dorcas let loose a cackle. ‘You really are a little kid sometimes, you know?’ Dorcas said, trying to stop laughing but failing miserably. ‘I am not! I just know what I want and I know how to get it,’ Barty said, jutting out his chin.
‘Do you? Because last time I checked, Evan kicked you out because he didn’t want you close,’ Remus asked in a light tone, which made Barty shoot up and glare at him. ‘For your information, Lupin, Evn actually asked me to come back and he kissed me,’ he said, looking at Remus with squinted eyes. ‘Nuh uh. You kissed Evan, and Evan then pulled away because he knew it wasn’t right,’ Dorcas corrected him in the same light tone that Remus used. ‘Same thing.’
‘No, there’s a clear difference. But, does James know you kissed?’ Remus asked, setting aside his book to look at Barty. ‘Yeah, Evan went to tell him. Don’t really know what happened though,’ Barty muttered. He made a mental note to send Evan a message to ask about it later. ‘It’s also, by the way, not really your business, Lupin. So keep your nose out,’ Barty said. Remus snickered softly. ‘My apologies Bartemius, but I do love some drama in my life,’ he said, not really in an apologising manner.
‘Yeah, that’s why you have whirlwind Sirius, remember? So keep your nose out of my shit.’ Barty gave him one last look, before huffing and laying down again in the sun.
‘What did you just call me?’
‘I called you a whirlwind, Sirius. Because you are one,’ Barty said simply, not even looking at the boy when he sat down beside Remus, his hair dripping wet. ‘Well if I am a whirlwind then you must be a tornado. Because you are way worse than I am!’ Sirius said, jutting out his chin and looking at Remus to get confirmation. Barty snorted. ‘Keep telling yourself that, Sirius.’
‘I… I will! Because it is true! And I don’t lie to myself like you do!’ Sirius said, grinning at his comeback. Barty raised his head to look at the boy. ‘You don’t lie to yourself? Sirius, everyone and their mother knows you have the feels for Remus, but you keep telling yourself that you just see him as a good friend. Be real to yourself,’ he said. Dorcas hissed his name, but Barty just shrugged. ‘It’s the truth though. Poor Remus,’ he said, shaking his head.
‘Okay, keep your nose out of my business. What goes on between me and Remus is not for you to know,’ Sirius said while pointing a finger at barty and wiggling it. ‘Ha! Just said that to Remus, but he didn’t listen,’ Barty said, snickering and looking at Remus, who was now sitting awfully still, almost as if he was frozen in place. He blinked at Barty before standing up and coughing once. ‘I am, uh… going for a swim. Bye,’ he muttered, only to realise that meant getting wet and having to take off his clothes, which made him wince. ‘On second thought, I am getting an ice cream,’ he said, before walking off.
‘Hey! Remus, wait! I want an ice cream too!’ Sirius yelled, before running after the boy.
Dorcas shook her head, a smile playing on her lips. She turned to face Barty. ‘Now that those two are gone, tell me the truth. What’s going on?’ Dorcas said, giving Barty a pointed stare. ‘Well… Okay, so you know about the kiss and shit. But… I’ve been having dreams. About Evan. And I don’t know what they mean,’ he said, frowning while trying to find the right words. Dorcas nodded at him. ‘Dreams are confusing, yes. I am not an expert, but you know that Pandora is. Why don’t you try telling her about it? She’ll be able to help you, I’m sure,’ Dorcas said, smiling kindly at Barty.
‘That’s actually a really good idea, Cassie. Thank you,’ Barty said, feeling a little more relieved now that he had found a way to decipher his dreams with the help of his friend. Dorcas smiled at him shortly, before her face turned serious again. ‘That’s not all. What’s going on with you and Regulus?’
‘Oh. Well it’s uh… Sex?’ He said, smiling at Dorcas who didn’t smile back. ‘It is sex though. Like, it just happens. We just… Are alone in a room and both frustrated and then we have sex. After we pretend it didn’t happen and we don’t bring it up.’ Dorcas took a deep breath in, before releasing maybe the biggest sigh Barty has ever heard from someone that’s not himself. ‘Okay, I am going to say this really slow so you can properly understand me, Barty. Are. You. Kidding me!’ Dorcas yelled, before throwing a bag of crisps at Barty’s head, which he didn’t see coming.
‘Ouch! And no. I uh… It’s the truth,’ he muttered, before Dorcas let out another exasperated sigh. ‘Barty, do you know how stupid it is to have sex with Regulus? Regulus, who clings to anyone who gives him attention because he craves it like no one else? Regulus, who is your best friend? Regulus, who you kissed which made Evan, the boy you actually like, jealous? This is just asking for problems, Osito.’ Dorcas gave him a look awfully similar to his mother who was worried about him when he was younger. He smiled sadly at the memory, but shook it away.
‘I know, I know. But I don’t know what to do. Evan doesn’t want to… He doesn’t want me, Dor. I think I’ve ruined it completely for myself with him anyways. And Regulus and I both need to let off some steam, and I do like him, and it’s good and… and…’ Barty fell silent.
‘Barty, I love you. You know I do. But I need to tell you the hard truth, because no one else will do it. You need to stop doing stuff like this with Regulus. Maybe your dreams about Evan are telling you something. And if I was Evan, then yes, I’d be completely done with you and I wouldn’t even want to be your friend anymore. But Evan is Evan, and I don’t think he’d be able to live without you in his life. It’s always been you two. There’s always a duo in a friend group they say. And that’s just you two. He’ll come around, if you try,’ Dorcas said, making sure that Barty understood that he had to do something to make it better.
‘Well… I just think that Evan isn’t that mad because he doesn’t know about the sex. I mean, the first time was a fluke, and I’m secretly hoping Reg will tell him about the second time,’ Barty muttered really fast, almost so Dorcas didn’t hear it. ‘Wait, there was a first time? Barty!’ Dorcas yelled at him, making Barty wince and nod at her, eyes closed. ‘I know, I know! I’m stupid, I know,’ he muttered, before Dorcas sighed deeply and shook her head. ‘No you’re not. You’re just young and in love.’
‘I am also young and in love,’ Marlene said, plopping down beside Dorcas and pressing a kiss on her cheek. ‘What were you talking about?’ she asked, giving Barty an easy smile that Barty returned to her. ‘Nothing much. How’s the water?’ Barty asked, which made Marlene smile even more brightly.
‘Oh it’s so good! It’s a little cold, but that’s okay because it cools you down a little, and then when you get out of the water you warm up again! You gotta take a dive Crouch. And you too, pretty girl,’ Marlene said, before she winked at her girlfriend who laughed at her. ‘No, thank you. I’m perfectly fine right here,’ she said before she stretched her legs and laid down, eyes closed behind her sunglasses.
Marlene shared a look with Barty, who smirked at her. He motioned for her shoulders while he pulled off his shirt and grabbed Dorcas’ ankles. ‘Hey, what are you doing?’ she asked, alarmed. Barty just grinned at her. ‘Make yourself ready for a dive, Cassie,’ he said, while Marlene grabbed her shoulders and Dorcas began screaming.
‘No! No! Stop! Let me go! BARTY! Marlene, this isn’t funny! Stop, please! AAAHH!!’ And then she went underwater. She came up, sputtering and glaring at Marlene and Barty. ‘Not funny, guys,’ She muttered, while sighing deeply. Barty was cackling, and Marlene was clutching her chest from laughing. Dorcas shook out her braids and huffed. ‘I’ll get you back for this, Nalle, just you wait,’ Dorcas warned.
‘Ah, I believe you. Look forward to it, Meadowes.’ Barty was still chuckling, to much annoyance of Dorcas.
‘I really wonder why I’m friends with you sometimes.’
‘Surprisingly enough, you’re not the first one to say that.’
‘That’s really not surprising.’
‘Oi!’
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Evan’s nose was broken.
He was completely, utterly fucked.
Regulus was sitting beside him in the waiting room, until a plastic surgeon called Evan back in to discuss further options. Evan’s brain was silently spiralling while he fumbled with his hand. His knee was bouncing up and down in his seat.
His dad would kill him.
Would his nose be okay?
Would they be able to do rhinoplasty again?
Would his nose now be crooked forever?
Would- ‘Evan, stop that. You’ll be fine. Plastic surgeons can do wonders,’ Regulus interrupted his thoughts, putting his hand on Evan’s knee to still it. ‘I know,’ he muttered to Regulus before the door from the office opened up and the doctor called Evan’s name.
Evan sighed deeply and stood up, Regulus following suit. ‘Gentlemen,’ the assistent greeted them, while they sat down opposite the doctor.
‘So, as you may have understood from my colleagues, your nose is in fact, broken. This normally wouldn’t be much of a problem, because it heals on its own almost always, however,’ the doctor looked up from a stack of papers, presumably Evan’s medical records. ‘Seeing as you had rhinoplasty when you were,’ he looked down again. His eyes widened. ‘I’m sorry, you had rhinoplasty when you were 9? Did you break your nose when you were 9?’ the doctor asked, making Evan wince.
‘Wait, you’ve had a nose job? Since when?’ Regulus whispered to him, giving him a confused look.
‘I uh… I didn’t break my nose, no. But it was crooked.’
‘That is not a reason to fix a nine year old’s nose, mister Rosier. Was this your idea?’ the doctor asked him. Evan gave him a weird look. ‘No, of course not. Which nine year old would think it’s a good idea to fix their nose? My dad asked his personal surgeon to do it,’ Evan muttered, looking down at his hands in his lap.
‘Okay, well, seeing as you’ve had surgery on your nose before, we are going to have to do another surgery to insure your nose will be alright,’ the doctor said, not looking up to meet Evan’s eyes anymore, keeping his eyes firmly on his documents. ‘We will prepare a room for you as soon as possible, so you’re obliged to stay here. Are you sober?’ the doctor asked, finally looking up again.
‘Yeah? Why the fuck would I come to the hospital while I’m drunk?’ Evan asked, frowning. That earned him a slap from Regulus.
‘Sober as in have you eaten or drunk in the last hours,’ Regulus hissed to him. Evan made an ‘oh’ with his mouth before thinking back. ‘Uh… no. I think the last thing I ate was dinner, last night? And that was a quick snack on the way to the bar. Where I only drank cola of course, because I’m not old enough to drink yet,’ he said, smiling sweetly at the doctor who gave him an unimpressed look.
‘When did you approximately stop drinking?’ the doctor asked him.
‘I don’t know. Like… at one, maybe two?’ Evan said, frowning a little.
The doctor gave him a disappointed look, before rounding up all of his papers and standing up. ‘Well, at least you’ve definitely been sober for eight hours now, so your surgery should be no problem to be planned late afternoon,’ the doctor said, nodding once at the assistant who opened the door for him.
‘You can wait in the waiting room. Someone will come and bring you to your own room before you’ll be taken away for surgery,’ the doctor said, before disappearing and leaving Evan and Regulus alone with the assistant.
Regulus turned to look at him. ‘You haven’t eaten anything today? Nor drink something?’ Regulus asked him, though his tone wasn’t kind. ‘No? Why what’s wrong?’ Evan asked him, frowning. Regulus scoffed loudly. ‘Evan it’s three PM! You have to take care of yourself. You know, eat and drink enough,’ Regulus hissed, earning a shrug from Evan while he stood up.
‘I’ll live. I’ll be on a model diet anyways, so might as well start now,’ Evan said simply, while he held the door open for Regulus.
‘That is not okay, Evan. What the fuck? Your dad just lets this happen?’
‘Regulus, my dad encourages it. I’ve always been too ‘chubby’ for him.’ Evan sat down inside the waiting room again. ‘Excuse you? You’re almost like a twig! How could you be too chubby?’ Regulus said, disturbed, which made Evan sigh deeply.
‘You’re not one to talk about shit like that, Regulus. Look in the mirror. You're perfectly model thin,’ Evan muttered, not even trying to keep the jealousy out of his voice.
‘What? I’m not. And apart from that, I’m not long enough to be a model anyways,’ Regulus huffed.
‘Whatever Regulus. I don’t want to talk about it.’ Regulus seemed to get the hint at that, leaving the conversation and grabbing his phone to scroll through it.
Evan looked around the waiting room, silently cursing the terrible chairs. He listened to the standard radio music, cursed himself for forgetting his Airpods, and then realising they were in his pockets after all.
‘You wanna listen to music?’ Evan asked Regulus, holding out one Airpod. Regulus grabbed it and muttered something about ‘normal music, not shitty ass sad boy stuff,’ and Evan snickered softly. ‘You want to listen to your own playlist? Because that is shitty ass sad boy stuff.’
Regulus shot him a glare, and Evan rolled his eyes. He looked up ‘on repeat’, one of the playlists made for him by spotify, only to get his eyes drawn to different playlists also made by spotify with debatable names. Playlists such as ‘delulu mix’ and ‘rizz mix’ made Evan softly snicker. Sounds like perfect playlists for Evan, because rizz he knows he has and delulu he’s been proven to be.
He picked the delulu one, getting an unimpressed raised eyebrow from Regulus when ‘l’amour de ma vie’ started playing from Billie Eilish.
‘What? It’s okay for me to listen to songs of other people like Billie Eilish too,’ Evan said, crossing his arms and scrunching his nose, only to pull a painful face right after, because oh right. His nose was broken.
He kinda forgot about that.
He shook his head and looked around the waiting room again. He glanced at an older couple, who were softly talking to each other and giving furtive glances at the door. He wondered what they were here for.
Did one of them have pain somewhere? Did they need to get a new knee? Was this even the department to get a new knee?
Evan didn’t know.
He looked at Regulus, getting a glimpse of his screen before Regulus noticed and turned away from Evan.
‘Regulus, are you joking? You’re seriously reading fanfiction?’ Evan said, a laugh bubbling up and out of his mouth. Regulus set his jaw and glared at Evan. ‘Yes. Most times it’s better than normal books, so shut your ass and let me read.’
Evan snickered again, but let Regulus to his fanfiction.
‘Regulus?’
Regulus sighed deeply and muttered ‘yes, Evan,’ but he didn’t look up to meet Evan’s eyes.
‘If my dad calls while I’m in surgery, will you pick up and pretend to be me?’ Evan asked, his eyes cast on the floor. ‘Yes I will, though I highly doubt your father will call.’
They fell into silence again for a little bit.
Evan looked around again, imagining a story for a young girl who was sitting with an older girl Evan imagined was her older sister.
‘Regulus?’
Regulus rolled his eyes. ‘Yes, Evan?’
‘Can you not tell Barty about my surgery?’ Evan asked softly, still not quite looking at Regulus, though Regulus didn’t look at him either, too focused on his book. ‘I think he already knows, Evan. And I’m not lying to one of my friends just for you.’
Evan raised an eyebrow. ‘So that’s where you draw the line at being a shitty friend? Wow,’ Evan muttered, but apart from a death glare, Evan didn’t get an answer back.
‘Evan?’
Evan was surprised to hear Regulus break the silence, but he nodded and turned to finally face the boy. Regulus put away his phone. ‘Yeah, what is it, Reg?’
‘How do you… know?’ Regulus asked, frowning at his own question. ‘Know… What?’
Regulus sighed deeply and rolled his eyes, shutting his phone and staring into Evan’s eyes with his icy blue ones. ‘How do you know that you’re in love with Barty? Like, what if I’m not really in love with James, but I just tell myself I am. But in reality I’m obsessed with him and I’m actually crazy, you know?’ Regulus said, as if Evan understood him like they were the same person.
Which they weren’t by the way. Just to make it clear.
‘I uh… I don’t know, Regulus. But if you were to be obsessed with him, I don’t think you would’ve pushed him away because you were scared of hurting him. I think you’d want to lock him up and keep him all for yourself if you were genuinely obsessed. You know, not even let him out with his friends at all,’ Evan said, nodding after saying it, because he agreed with himself for once.
‘Oh. Okay.’ Silence.
‘Thank you.’
Evan’s eyes widened, and Regulus realised his mistake. ‘Holy shit! Did you just say thank you? Did the Regulus Black just say thank you to me?’
‘Oh fuck off.’
‘I will never forget this moment, ever.’