Chapter 18
Remus was more known to swear like a sailor, but Evan made a great attempt at taking his title.
Sirius informed James and Evan of the… situation, after which James decided it was only normal to get them out, though Evan didn’t seem to agree. ‘It’s their own fucking fault!’ he complained, while James gently guided him outside of the club. ‘Putain de fuckers fucking connards excuses the terribles friends,’ he muttered underneath his breath. His accent was prominent now, so much so that Remus didn’t understand the English parts of his sentence more than the French.
‘Okay calm down, little ball of anger. Get them out and leave,’ Sirius said, raising an eyebrow with a small smile on his face. ‘What are you smiling at you, you, sac de merde,’ Evan said, frowning first when he couldn’t form words, but then giving Sirius an angry look. Remus had a passing thought of how Evan looked like a small child like this, trying to insult an adult.
‘You did not just call me that!’ Sirius yelled in shock. He gave Evan an offended look, but was met with a proud grin and a raised eyebrow from Evan. Remus frowned. ‘He called you… what again?’ Remus asked, a little confused. ‘He called Sirius a sack of shit,’ James whispered to Remus, who made a small ‘ah’ and then tried to keep in his laugh as Sirius went on insulting Evan in French.
Evan stood with his arms crossed, staring at Sirius unimpressed while Sirius fired off insult after insult, getting closer until he ran out of words. ‘You done?’ Evan asked after a few seconds of silence. His voice was still thick with his accent, and Remus speculated if this was his actual voice, but he was now too focused on other things to keep his accent at bay.
‘You still have that terrible accent, little rose. Thought it would’ve gotten better after a few years in Britain,’ Sirius said, smirking while he said it. He leaned back while Evan processed his words and his face changed into one awfully close to crying. Remus frowned at the sudden change of his emotion, and James seemed to also notice it, because he carefully guided Evan away from Sirius, who he then shot an angry look at.
Remus had an awful feeling in his stomach that he was familiar with a scene similar to this. When he thought about it for a little longer though, it suddenly hit him.
‘Awh, crying again because you can’t understand us?’
‘Please, Rosier, English isn’t that hard.’
‘Leave me alone!’
‘If you learn proper English without that horrible accent of yours, sure.’
‘Sirius! That’s enough. We both know what mother would think of you teasing someone for knowing proper French.’
Remus stood very still while he bit the inside of his cheek. He knew Sirius and James weren’t nice when they were younger, but they grew up. A little at least. They weren’t as problematic anymore now, just playing harmless pranks and not bullying kids for it.
‘What? You can’t handle a little teasing anymore?’ Sirius shot at Evan, his eyes filled with a hatred Remus rarely saw in Sirius’ eyes. ‘Sirius, enough! Why are you picking a fight with him? He didn’t do shit to you!’ Remus’ tone was low, a warning for Sirius to either take or leave. He met Remus’ eyes, looked at him in silence, and then sighed deeply. He said nothing when he got onto his motorcycle, and handed Remus his helmet.
He said nothing when James told him to just go already, and Evan lit a cigarette while sitting on the pavement, carefully blowing out the smoke in small rings. Remus never noticed Evan smoked. Guess he didn’t pay enough attention. His nose was still thick and red, but it had stopped bleeding, luckily.
James sat down beside Evan and ran a hand through his hair. ‘I- Evy, I’m sorry. Why didn’t you tell me? We were so terrible to you,’ James said, while Evan scoffed. ‘Were implies that you guys stopped being terrible. You still are, though you may not realise it. I know Sirius likes to target his little brother because he’s everything Sirius wishes he wouldn’t be, but he hits me and Barty with that too. Your stupid pranks aren’t funny. We didn’t ask to find our dorm thrashed. We didn’t ask to have our hair permanently painted blue,’ Evan muttered, his voice thick with a French accent to it that James found awfully endearing.
James remembered the blue hair prank. Sirius and James were young then, didn’t realise it wouldn’t work on Regulus because his hair was too dark. It did work on Barty and Evan though, who slept in the same dorm as Regulus and used the same shampoo. James remembered Evan coming back after spring break with a buzzcut.
‘It’s not innocent when you do stuff like that to us. We have strict parents, James. They don’t like stunts like yours.’ Evan spoke softly, blowing smoke from his cigarette while he formed words. His voice was slowly clearing itself of accent, and James already mourned the loss, though he said nothing.
It was his fault, in a way, that Evan wanted to conceal his accent.
‘That’s Evan Rosier, James. Son of my parent’s friends. He has an embarrassing accent.’
‘Oi Rosier! Do we need to talk in easy English with you, or can you understand us?’
‘What?’
‘Awhh, Sirius, he can’t understand you.’
‘I can barely understand him, James. One word and I couldn’t understand it!’
He felt guilty, when he thought about how much of an asshole he had been when he was younger, but there wasn’t much to do about it anymore now. He could apologise, but he felt like that wasn’t quite enough.
Evan finished his cigarette, and lit another one. He offered it to James in silence, who refused it with a small smile. Evan shrugged and sat beside him in silence. James wanted to say something. James has to say something.
‘Talk to me. Why are you so quiet?’ James asked, which made Evan sigh deeply. ‘Just wondering why Sirius hates me so much,’ Evan muttered around his cigarette. His accent was gone. ‘Sirius doesn’t hate you, he just…’ James trailed off, thinking of a better way to put it. ‘Sirius despises me, James. Everyone with eyes can see it. It’s almost as if he hates me more than he hates his brother sometimes.’ Evan’s voice started to become softer and quieter with everything he said, until not much more than a silent whisper was left. ‘I think he’s under the impression I had a better childhood than him, though I had the same wealth and role of heir,’ he whispered, though he didn’t look at James. James doubted he even wanted to say it out loud.
‘You’re the oldest?’ James asked carefully. He was trying to steer the conversation away from this, because Evan was only getting more sad and they did need to pick up Regulus and Barty, seeing as the other boys didn’t have enough money on them. ‘I’m the only,’ Evan answered while he stood up and stretched.
‘Wow. That’s… that must be rough,’ James muttered, but Evan shrugged. ‘Nah. Made a deal with my father. He would keep me out of the business until I’m sixteen, so I wouldn’t-’ Evan suddenly stopped talking and he let the hand holding out James’ helmet drop. ‘You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to,’ James said, a bit confused by the sudden change of moods.
‘I- It’s not that. It’s, I turned sixteen. When I get back from holiday, I won’t… I will have trouble going as freely as I go now,’ Evan muttered, which did not make a lot of sense to James. Regulus was the heir to the Black dynasty, but he could walk freely.
‘Why can’t you walk freely?’ James asked, trying to stop himself, but curiosity winning the battle. ‘Because- Well… Okay,’ he sighed deeply and sat back down. ‘Regulus is the heir to the Black dynasty, yeah? And Barty’s the son of the minister of safety and shit. So both are like, known to the world, but neither are made to be in the spotlight. I- I was. From the moment I was born, I knew my fate. My father wanted to call me Calixtus, so he could manifest that I would become handsome and look good on the cover of a magazine,’ Evan muttered softly, not meeting James’ eyes. ‘It’s my middle name, thanks to my mother,’ he added while reaching to light another cigarette, but James stopped him and grabbed his hands. Evan looked at him for a short while before he sighed and let his hands drop.
‘You probably know my dad. Promise to not be… weird about it?’ Evan asked, eyes big and uncertain. James nodded at him and smiled softly. He had a feeling Evan would’ve never told him this if he was sober, but James wasn’t a saint and he was really curious, so he let Evan explain. ‘My dad is Jonah Rose. The, the famous model, who gave away his place in front of the camera to build up his legacy of fashion magazines,’ Evan whispered hurriedly, almost as if he didn’t want James to hear him, but James heard all of it.
‘No way. You’re… You look so much like him, now that you say it,’ James said, his eyes widening when he realised. James wasn’t big on fashion magazines, but everyone knew Jonah Rose. He was a model who would go down in the books as one of the best from their time. He founded ‘LaRose’ the famous magazine equal in its fame with others like ‘Vogue’ and ‘Elle’. A mixture between scandals and fashion and empowerment.
Evan scoffed. ‘You’re thinking of my grandfather, the first Jonah Rose. I do look like him, yes. But my father only followed in his footsteps. My grandfather did the real work with founding LaRose. My father tried to rebel against my grandfather’s wishes in a way, by becoming a model instead of the editor in chief for LaRose. Later he did decide it wasn’t for him though, and followed my grandfather’s footsteps,’ Evan explained, while he softly smiled at James’ confused frown.
‘So… Your grandfather founded the magazine, and your dad is the famous model?’ James asked, to which Evan nodded. ‘And you promised your dad that when you were sixteen…’
‘That I’d make my debut in the modelling world by being posted in one of the big magazines. Which would mean I’d be recognised everywhere, so I’d have barely any freedom. One cover is doable, if I manage to talk my dad out of the biggest ones, but from there on, I’ll be pulled out of school for weeks to do shoots and runways and learn the ropes,’ Evan said, going on and on and talking so fast James worried he was having a panic attack. Tears spilled from Evan’s eyes, but he was so busy talking that when James tried to tell him, he didn’t hear him.
‘And to be honest, I always told myself that sixteen was years away, and I’d find a way around it so I could at least finish school before diving into the business head first. But my dad made me sign a contract, and he is notorious in these things, so I won’t get out of it. And, and my dad has been on my ass extremely before my vacation to watch my food intake, which I struggled with immensly, but now I’m gone from his influence and I’m doing better, but if I get into modelling, I’ll have to continuously diet, because I’m not pretty like my dad is,’ he went on, not looking at James. He was fidgeting with his hands and he was shaking from nerves and still crying, but he didn’t hear it when James called his name.
‘And to be honest, I’m really fucking scared, because modelling fucks people up, James, and- and… What are you doing?’ Evan asked him, finally breathing. He turned his head to look at James’ hands which were slowly sneaking around his waist. Evan turned his head to meet James’ eyes, which were warm and soft. Evan looked down.
‘I’m sorry for rambling. I just… I guess I had to let it out,’ Evan said, tentatively looking up to meet James’ eyes again. James carefully placed one hand on his jaw, and used the other to wipe away Evan’s tears. Evan punched out a soft breath while James carefully wiped away his tears. He was staring at James. He looked like an angel, hurt by such a horrible world. A horrible world, which snapped his wings so he couldn’t fly anymore.
‘I didn’t… I didn’t mean to cry,’ Evan whispered, silent sobs making their way out of his mouth without his permission. ‘It’s okay, Evy. It’s okay to cry sometimes,’ James muttered softly, running a hand through Evan’s curls. Evan shook his head, moved away from James suddenly and took a deep breath. ‘No, we’re getting Barty and Reg. I’ve cried enough already,’ Evan said determined, not taking no for an answer from James.
He handed the helmet to James, who grabbed it slowly. ‘And you’re sure you can drive like this?’ James asked carefully. ‘Drinking doesn’t impact my driving skills. Would you rather walk?’ Evan asked him, while turning around to face him.
‘Yeah, actually. I’m not entirely sure if I can trust what you just said,’ James said softly, holding out his hand for Evan to grab. He groaned loudly and clicked his helmet shut on his scooter again, securing the lock he bought around both his and James’.
‘Not trusting me when I’m more trustworthy than his only ex, fucker,’ Evan muttered underneath his breath before leading the way towards the police station. It’s not such a long walk, anyways.
When they finally got there, Sirius was sitting outside, his eyes puffy, and Remus was sitting beside him. James felt Evan perk up to say something mean to Sirius, but he didn’t say anything after James gave him a look. James was happy Evan listened to him, because Evan didn’t know how badly Sirius could be affected by his little brother.
‘I’ll go in. Stay with him, he seems to need some comfort,’ Evan said to James softly. James nodded and let go of Evan’s hand. He sat down besides Sirius and gave him a hug.
‘What happened?’
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Barty sat back down, crossing his arms and staring at Regulus’ back.
‘He’s not coming back in. This is on you, Regulus,’ he said, raising an eyebrow when Regulus turned around to glare at him. Small tears glistened in Regulus’ eyes, and Barty felt as if someone was squeezing his heart to hurt him. ‘Sorry,’ he added softly, patting the space beside him on the cell bench to sit.
They were alone in the cell, luckily, because otherwise Barty would’ve probably fought a few more people. He was still high on his adrenaline and his anger, and he was pretty sure that wouldn’t leave until he gave someone a good punch and a few missing teeth.
‘It’s not your fault. Sirius is just too stupid to understand I’m also a kid. There’s a reason we don’t talk,’ Regulus muttered, but it seemed he was trying to convince himself more than Barty. ‘Have you used your phone call? We gotta get out of here,’ Regulus said, before pulling a disgusted face and sitting down beside Barty. ‘Who would I call? You’re the only one who’d bail me out right now,’ Barty said, his face on his shoes which were splattered with small drops of blood.
He didn’t really know whose blood it was. He didn’t know who he hit, though he didn’t tell that to anyone. The only thing he knew was that he had gotten mad at James, lashed out, and then found himself getting berated like a child by Evan, who almost broke his leg. He hoped it wasn’t Evan’s blood. He didn’t want to hurt Ev.
He wanted to hurt James. For taking Evan from him, for hurting Regulus so much, for being so fucking nice all of the time and making it so fucking hard for Barty to hate him. Barty looked up when the door to the station opened. Barty frowned when he saw blonde curls and irritated, brown eyes though.
‘Ev?’ Barty asked, standing up and walking over to the other side of the cell to get closer to him. ‘Evan? You came back for us?’ Barty asked, before Evan sighed deeply. He pressed the call button for the policeman to come in, but Regulus shook his head. ‘He’s not here. It’s past midnight, so he left,’ Regulus said bored, sitting down and closing his eyes.
‘Better come back tomorrow,’ Regulus muttered to Evan who rolled his eyes. Barty noticed his nose now, though. ‘Oh my god, did I do that? Ev, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hit you, it was meant for-’ ‘James, I know. I don’t care what you have to say, Barty. If I can’t get you out, I’ll get back tomorrow or something. Maybe I’ll send Dor with some money,’ he said, already walking towards the door.
‘No! Evan! Wait! Please, I’m sorry! Evan!’ Barty yelled, trying to get his attention, but failing. ‘Stop yelling, Crouch. I wanna sleep,’ Regulus hissed angrily before Barty frowned. ‘Sleep? Are you serious?’ Regulus’ face twisted into something ugly. ‘Pretty sure I just cussed Sirius out for being the way he is, so no, I don’t think I am Sirius,’ Regulus muttered, his voice already thick with sleep. How he did it, Barty didn’t know.
Within ten minutes, Regulus was asleep. He softly muttered countless things in his sleep, but Barty didn’t care for it much. He was thinking about what Evan had said to him, right before he saw red and started fighting.
‘You don’t know me.’
But Barty did, didn’t he? He was Evan’s best friend. He must’ve known Evan to be so close to him. He must know Evan to feel so much for him.
‘You don’t know my favourite colour.’
His favourite colour? Well, Barty didn’t think that mattered much. It’s just a colour. But now that Evan said it like that, Barty felt like a bad friend not knowing that. He felt like a bad person for it, actually.
‘You don’t know my middle name.’
It was something with a star right? Barty knew it started with a C. It was some obscure name that Evan hated, so why should Barty know it? It shouldn’t matter.
‘You don’t know why I actually wanted to spend this vacation alone.’
That was a lie. Barty knew he wanted to spend the vacation away from his friends. But he couldn’t help and think that there was something else behind that sentence, an implication that that wasn’t the only reason Evan wanted a vacation away from them.
‘You don’t know what music I listen to, you don’t even know how much I lie to you and Regulus just to not get laughed at!’
This, Barty must say, felt like a slap to his face. Sure, he and Regulus teased him about some things because it was funny, but Regulus listened to Maisie Peters and didn’t get any hate? Hell, Barty listens to Ariana Grande and gets praise from Dorcas for it. Why did Evan feel like he had to lie to Barty? He never had to lie. Barty would’ve been his friend regardless of his music taste. Maybe Barty would’ve realised he liked him earlier if he wasn’t lying.
‘Fuck! If you want to even have a chance at my forgiveness, learn to know me. Actually me.’
So now, Barty was going to make it his mission to get to know the actual Evan. Because Evan couldn’t have lied about everything, could he?