Wife Me Up
His golden glare singed your skin, wide and boiling in a wildfire of malice. “I don’t care who you think you are, or what you think about me, or whatever shitty problems you have with my attendance.”
“W—" you coughed. It didn't hurt, but he was impeding your speech. "What the hell are you—” A band of pressure tightened around your neck.
“Shut up! Don’t talk down to me! I am the Ultimate Yakuza, whether you like it, or not! And I won’t hesitate to kill any of you dumbfucks if you get in my way! As a matter a fact...I don’t think you realize just how easily I could snap your neck right now."
You glared at him, a spiteful grin. "I...is that supposed to be threa—" His fingers dug deeper into your neck, straining your vocal cords. Odd. Somehow, you weren’t quite choking to death just yet. Well then, you’d better make the best of your remaining lifespan. "Y... ou...!" Coward! Bitch! Face me head-on! You tried to claw at his hand, survival instincts flaring, which only tightened his hold.
“What? Got nothing to say to me this time? No smart-ass remark?” He jeered. “What was that? Gurgle-gurgle-gurgle? Real fucking wise.”
“Just what is going on here?” A sharp, unfamiliar voice sent icicles flittering up your spine. Cold sweat beaded at your hairline as you met this stranger’s unyielding—yet undeniably hot—red gaze.
Fuyuhiko surprisingly reacted with similar edge, every sinew in his body clamming up. This was your chance.
You grabbed his wrist with both hands and twisted.
"Agh! What the fu—"
You kicked up your legs, lined a heel with his chest, and sprung, rocketing him a full meter backward as you landed into a roll.
"And just what is going on here?"
The sudden ice of the voice crawled up your back and nearly sent you tripping into the pool.
"Shit—" You grit your teeth, a scrape on your palm. Whatever. Walk it off.
"What—" The boy snarled, cradling his wrist, shoulders painfully tense. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"...There seems to be a fight, already," she said simply. "I am breaking it up."
"Hey, I'm innocent," you held up your hands. "It's this hothead who suddenly started choking me out without warning."
"...Tch." He shot up, wiped himself off, and started to leave.
"Leaving so soon? I'm all hot and aching here, buddy," you pouted.
"Keep it in your ass! Don't put your annoying, ear-bleeding bitch ass anywhere near me!"
"Well, that's rude."
"Go fuck a mop."
You frowned as he walked away. What a shame. If he wasn't going to like you, you didn't need to like him. Besides, he wasn't going to get friends with those anger issues.
The grey haired girl grimaced, eyes crimson and cold on his back. "I suppose... Making introductions, no matter how small, is still a good first step."
"The first step to suing him," you rolled your eyes, massaging your throat. An awkward silence lodged itself between you two.
You noted the silence. Hm. No Hope Fragment. What was the deal with those, anyway?
The new girl rubbed her arm sheepishly. “I’m sorry, about... Fuyuhiko. He… seems like the type of person with quite a short temper. I’m sure, though, even in him, you will find something desirable.”
"Don't be so generous. It's not our job to look for human decency."
She shut her eyes. "...I suppose you're right. My apologies."
You snorted. "Madame, you didn't do anything. Just keep looking gorgeous."
"W... what...?"
"Come on, you have to recognize it in the mirror every morning. How many supermodels did you skin for such ravishing looks?"
"W... well..." she shied her head. "I don't think I've particularly skinned anyone in the first place... I didn't—I mean...surely it's not that big of a deal..."
You hushed her. "Come on come on, you're already beautiful, you don't have to be an absolute fucking liar."
"W—what do you...!? I—I just... what're you saying...?"
"Alright, lemme put it in simple terms for you, you blazing hot, mega beautiful stab-me-I'd-say-thank-you mildly goth godde—" You found your words covered by warm hands.
"I am not 'b—blazing hot', I'm the Ultimate Swordswoman...!"
"Well shit, that's even hotter," you muffled. "Please stab me."
"N—no! No—I just...please, just call me Peko." She coughed, removing her hands. It was like she was trying to scrap together whatever dignity she had left. "...Peko Pekoyama."
“[Name] [Surname]," you mini-curtsied, "Still curious, though, how'd you end up here? I didn't see you before."
“Ah, right… I suppose you could say the two of you were quite loud. I came from inside that hotel.”
“Oh yeah, that’s the second to last place I haven’t checked out yet.”
“I see.” You almost missed the way her face morphed into an eerie red glare, as if she was recalling something traumatizing. “Then… I suggest you prepare yourself.”
“What do you—”
"Ah—excuse me, but I'm afraid I've used up quite a bit of time. I should get going now."
"Awww, really?"
But she was already striding off like a lonesome soldier.
...The fuck?
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
The hotel was a strange clash of colors—rich blue carpet, burgundy pillars, and a red carpet staircase. There was an assortment of plants as well as a bright yellow monitor. And two foosball tables, with spinning red stools at their ends. Wow. They do not no how to match decor. Sprawled onto the staircase was the sakura haired girl mashing her thumbs at record speed on a pink gaming device.
You crouched, leaning to get a look over the screen. “Well hello, player one," You were mildly awed by the colors flickering about and consuming the device. It was a hurricane of luminescent bullet vomit. She doesn't even feel my presence! Now, that wouldn’t do.
You planted your hands on her shoulders and started shaking the shit out of her. “Hellooooooooooo? Areee youuu thereeeee!?”
“Ah—” The Nintendo-esque thing fell from her hands, a big GAME OVER sign flashing across the screen.
“Oh… whoops, sorry. Uh… didn’t really think that one through, huh?”
She craned her head up, pink eyes drilling into you with a blankness that felt like it could wash over your entire life. It didn’t even feel human.
“Uh… again, sorry about that," You made the motions of scratching at your neck. "I can leave, if you want…?”
She blinked, and then you were half-convinced what you just experienced was a hallucination. “...Oh… it’s fine…” She rubbed her eyes, a yawn rising from her throat. “I wasn’t anywhere close to my high score, and was starting to fall asleep, anyway…”
“You were that far in and still nowhere near your high score?”
She smiled, bent over, and set the controller back into her lap. “You’re here for introductions, right…?”
“Yeah?”
Awkward tension crammed up the air. You coughed. Just when you were about to shake her again,
“My name is Chiaki Nanami. I’m the Ultimate Gamer… my hobby is games, and I’m relatively good with most genres…”
“Uh… you okay? Is your ping spiking? I seem to have a little trouble connecting to the server…”
She fixed you yet again with that blank look.
“...Sorry. I can’t speak well without composing everything in my head first. If I don’t prepare my words, I’m not a good speaker… especially with strangers. But I’m sure, once we get to know each other more, things will move faster…” Her jaw unhinged into the biggest yawn you’d ever seen, drool beading at the corners. “...Talking is exhausting.” With that, she rolled over, nuzzling herself into the plush carpet of the staircase before melting into a rhythm of soft snores.
“Ah.”
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
A creak turned your head to the door.
“...Gasp! No way!” You buried your mouth dramatically under your fingers.
Olive eyes darted back and forth. “...What?”
“Nagito!” You ran up to the two. “How ya been, old bud?”
He blinked down at you. Then turned to cuck (who was awake now, so that was a thing), “This is [Name] [Surname]. She’s a Reserve Course Student." He ran a hand through his hair, "She... exists?"
"Well, hello to you too."
“Reserve Course…?”
Nagito proceeded into a long-winded explanation. Oh well, at least you didn't have to do it.
“...Hajime? Are you okay? You’re looking pale again…”
The brunet pressed a knuckle to his lip, worry knotting up his brows.
“Yeah cuck, if you’re going to faint again, do it in the corner.”
His eyes snapped open. “Wait… cuck?”
“Duh. Who else? The carpet?”
“...You…” He raised an accusing finger at you. “You’re the one who told Nagito my name was cuck!”
“...Eh?”
Nagito lifted his palms. “Now now, Hajime…” He received a harsh glare, and instantly shut up.
You choked on a laugh. “Yeah Nagito! How could you?”
"...Um..."
Hajime wasn't satisfied with such a half-assed answer, “Why would you believe that was my name!?”
He laughed nervously. “I don’t know, I thought perhaps you had a tragic childhood, or ruthless parents? I didn’t think it would be that strange for an Ultimate…”
“My childhood was just fine!”
You wiped tears on your sleeve. “Well, to be fair, I did call you that. He didn’t have anything else to go off of.”
“But—why would you do that? And why would you believe any human could be named that!?”
“I mean…”
“Because. I’m hilarious.”
“I just figured… perhaps you two knew one another beforehand?” Nagito shrugged, still flashing those pearly whites. “Only… I’m not quite sure. You two seem very similar, in a way.”
Both of you deadpanned at him this time.
“How?”
He waved placating hands. “Come on, Hajime, let’s calm down… I’ll admit it was a silly mistake. Besides, you still haven’t finished your introduction.”
“Er… right… um, my name is Hajime Hinata. Nice… to meet you…?”
“So… we’ve finished our business here, right? We should start meeting everyone else.”
“Woah woah woah—you can't just do that!"
Nagito tilted his head, "...do what?"
"Ignore me!"
“W—we’re not ignoring you…” Hajime said.
“Uh-huh, sure, erectohead. What would you call the past thirty seconds?”
“Don’t call me that,”
“Oh yeah? Call you what?”
“Ha ha, very funny. I’m not saying that.”
“Hmm… but I just don’t recall… could you perhaps repeat it for me?”
“No! Remember your own insults!”
“Was it perhaps… Slim Jim?”
“That’s even worse!”
“...Slimmy Jimmy?”
“Use my actual name, goddamn it!”
You slung an arm around his shoulders. “Okay, but, what if I call you… my love?”
“N—! …W—wait, what?”
“Oh, come on, this is a stupid fun conversation, your sass is hilarious, and your cute face is a bonus too, of course.”
He blinked. “...Oh, I get it. You’re crazy.”
“...huh?”
“I mean no one tells anyone they just met this kind of stuff, right? I mean the speed of light is supposed to be the limit, you know, yet you’re moving even faster than that.”
You laughed. “Hey, it’s called having standards.”
“No. No it’s not."
Nagito smiled. “You’re right, Hajime. We shouldn’t spare a nutcase anymore time than we need.”
You scoffed. “Well, excuse you, princess.”
“And excuse ourselves we will.” He gave Hajime a gesture. “Coming?”
“Uh…” Hajime paled as he watched Nagito casually trample Chiaki up the stairs. “Sure.”
You blinked. The door closed behind them.
“…Hey! Hey, wait! I still have to meet those people too!” You ran up after them.
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
The restaurant was more of a ‘tropical-welcome’ than ‘first-class-grand’ (although it was still fucking massive); wood boarding spreading from the floor to the tables to the ceiling—which was actually a darker shade.
“This looks like…wait, why are you here?” Hajime said.
“What, you got something wrong with my presence?”
“Well, no… that’s not…”
Nagito tutted. “Oh Hajime, you’re too kind for your own good.”
"Hey," you said. "…Fuck you."
“—That’s right! It’s terrible if it gets swollen by poison. That’s why you must suck it out with your mouth as soon as possible…” A familiar-yet-unnamed voice sent shudders to your toes. It was the tiny chef from earlier—with a concerning stream of blood oozing out of his nose.
“Poison? I see…” The elegant head of a personified beauty standard tilted, sweeping stardust fringe from her marbled hues.
Nagito coughed, “Um... excuse me, Sonia, but do you have a second?”
“Sigh… just as I was getting close…” Chef hat-man ran a comb through his sweaty hair.
“Uh… what?” Everyone looked uncomfortable, except for the woman that clasped her hands with a mastered smile.
“Good day.”
“To elope?” you finger-gunned.
She blinked owlish eyes. “Pardon?”
“It’s my favorite version of 'hello'.”
“Ah… I see! I would like to elope with you too!”
“Don’t follow it, Sonia. It’s… controversial, to say the least.” Nagito said.
“Oh…” She held a melancholy finger to her lip. “My apologies. I truly did not mean to offend anyone. It sounds quite intriguing, though, I would love the opportunity to be able to learn more about it.”
You shot Nagito a smug look. “Why, I would love to teach you.”
Her eyes shined. “This is quite exciting! I do look forward to the occasion! …Ah! Please excuse me, we do not even know each other’s names!”
She quickly composed herself. “I am Sonia Nevermind. Let us do our best to get along! Capricorn?”
“Oh, uh… yeah… my name’s Hajime Hinata. But um… did you mean, ‘capiche’ in that sentence?”
“Ah! Yes, of course, my apologies. Foolish me, I did it again!”
You snorted. She was even distressed in grace. “Welp, I’m [Name] [Surname]. Meeting you has been a pleasure.”
“Oh please, the pleasure’s all mine!” Three heads snapped down to the sweaty chef-hatted man. “Don’t treat me like a side dish, now! You’re with Teruteru Hanamura, after all, the Ultimate Cook. —But please, call me chef! It has a much more… sophisticated air, don’t you think?” Something about this guy sent your survival instincts flaring.
“It’s no surprise your breath would be taken away by Sonia,” Nagito said as if Teruteru never even spoke. “She’s heir to the European kingdom Novoselic. True royalty, although, that's not unexpected of someone called Ultimate Princess.”
“Hold the phone, how the hell is that a talent?"
"...What're you talking about?"
"Being a princess isn't a skill. It's a birth certificate. That's like praising a penguin for being born as a penguin!"
"Well, technically, it's a status."
"Yeah, just like how 'dad' is a status. That doesn't mean they have to be a good dad."
Nagito arched a brow, "Well, it's nice to at least have a dad. It's better than living alone."
You snorted. “You should meet some of my friends’ dads.”
“And, how, exactly, does that pertain to Sonia's talent?"
"Because getting a high status doesn't equate to talent, duh."
"What about getting promoted to manager?"
"That's completely different!"
Nagito laughed, shutting his eyes in the widest smile. "Come on, [Name]! Don't you think it's time to cut it out? It's not nice to take your jealousy out on others."
"...The fuck are you talking about?"
"...oh, I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to hurt any nerves you might have." He put so much effort into the sincerity of his words; it was the most patronizing thing you'd ever heard.
Your eyes narrowed, fingers slowly curling as you lifted your head to face him. "...Um, yeah. I don't know about you, but I'm not into the whole let's just assume things about people we hardly know shtick."
He only stared and stared at you, baring all teeth in a growing display, "...I see. I suppose that's my bad. I'll ask, next time. Speaking of which..." he tilted his head, a clear view of the dark panes of grated glass propped in place of his eyes. "Do all reserve course students use violence to solve their problems, or is it just you?"
You flexed your fingers, "...Depends. Are you trying to pick a fight?"
"U... um..." Hajime's eyes flicked across the two of you, rock-still, to the door. "...guys?"
“Y—yes! Guys, wait! Please, do not argue!” Sonia interjected. "I believe... [Name] is not entirely wrong."
All eyes landed on her. “...Huh?”
“If I may be truthful, I do not quite understand what the academy sees in me either... while I am honored to be enrolled, I cannot help but feel a bit out of place…”
“I wonder why…” Hajime said sarcastically.
“It is the truth, though! Truly, I would much prefer if you all treated me as just another one of your fellow classmates. I would not be able to stand with all of you wonderful people, otherwise…”
“But—you’re royalty…!” baffled Hajime.
“Please, do not think of me as such! Remove the title, for I am simply your normal, everyday Japanese schoolgirl. Capiche?"
There was so much force behind the last word you thought you would be blown to space.
“Y—yes, ma’am…”
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
“Hmhmhmhmhm… what a spicy interaction… I wish I could channel this kind of flavor into my food… oh, wait! I probably can! Hmhmhmhmhmhm!”
This time, his comments garnered a laugh, Nagito prompting, “I’d expect no less from the Ultimate Chef! It quite fits you to head straight to the restaurant. Does it suit your expectations?”
“Heh heh heh… well, since I don’t want to be a liar, I’ll tell you the truth right here…" He dramatically flapped his hair. "…Yup, it fits my expectations quite nicely! The urban mood of my home neighborhood was exquisite, but this kind of rural atmosphere is also quite fine. Hmhmhmhmhm!”
”you know what’s also quite fine?” you fingergunned.
“Mhmhmhmhmhmh…! Oh, how charming!” Blood rushed out of his nose so fast it left you incredulous to how he never passed out.
You snorted, “yeah, I do have that affect on people sometimes.”
Nagito grimaced, “I think it’s best you don’t egg him on.”
“Huh? Why?”
Hajime frowned as he stared at Teruteru’s bliss-filled face. “You… are also just, really calm about this whole situation, aren’t you?”
“Well, there’s nothing to worry about, is there? Living here is quite nice.” Teruteru said.
“Nice…? How?”
He perked up. “This is serious business, so listen well.” He beckoned Hajime and Nagito to lean in, leaving you to crane your neck and circle around for more room to fit in. The three made a tight huddle, however.
"Hey—heyyyyyy! What're you guys talking about? Let me in too!"
"Yes, yes! Please, indulge us in what you guys would converse about at times like these!" Sonia cheered.
"Um..." The boys awkwardly pulled apart. Teruteru was bleeding from his nose, and the other two looked three times more traumatized than they had previously.
Nagito took the first step down the stairs.
”You’re leaving already?”
He looked at you. Then down the stairs. He sighed, “I think it’s best for all of us.”
”Why?”
Hajime whispered in your ear, “sexual harassment.”
”…ohhhhh,” you formed an empty smile, turning around. Teruteru was still nose bleeding as he stared at you, no eye contact.
“Hmhmhm…? Have you decided to go back for another rou—“
”Hey, Sonia!”
She tilted her head, “yes?”
”Wanna come with? I, at least, only have one more destination to go.”
”Oh, same,” said Hajime, “the farm.”
”Seeiously?” you laughed, “Does that mean we’re all going together? Okay, no, that’s seriously crazy! Maybe I should be the Ultimate Lucky Student.”
Nagito hid a snort under a cough. “Um…yeah. Sure. So lucky.”
You grinned, “so, what do you say, Sonia?”
"Are…you offering me an invitation to go exploring with the three of you!?"
Nagito laughed, “well, I suppose you could put it that way—“
She rocked on her heels, eyes sparkling. "Yes! Yes! Absolutely! I would love to! I have always wanted to indulge myself in what people would consider 'country'! This is quite exciting!"
“Aw, c‘mon don’t leave me all alone and aching, here!”
With a wide grin, you crouched down to Teruteru’s level. “I don’t know what you said to them, but if I ever catch your filthy little stare on any of these guys again I will personally grind you into a meatloaf, you fucking cow.”
He shivered, bleeding again, “well well well, I hope that’s a threat, and a promise…”
You grinned. “You say that now, but wait ‘till you find out it actually is a promise.”
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
With sympathetic looks, Sonia shook Chiaki awake so she could give a barely comprehensible introduction. It seemed Nagito and Hajime managed to catch Peko just before she left the area, so good for them.
And so, the four of you walked, kicking up sand with you and Sonia chattering in the lead. Meanwhile, Nagito and Hajime shot each other understanding glances: yes, I, too, have no idea what the fuck is going on anymore.
"And what's the deal with all these different types of oranges?" you rolled your eyes. "Like, seriously, just pick a name and stick with it! But noooo, humanity comes up with this long list of synonyms—not for important words, like a wider variety of formal pronouns like gentlemen or ladies or anything like that. But no. Oranges. Mandarins, tangerines, clementine, like what the actual fuck. Just because you failed at making orange or the name of your children creative, doesn't mean you can compensate now, scientists."
Sonia nodded vigorously. "Yes! Your passion is so strong, [Name]! I, too, hate oranges now!"
Nagito concerned over the glare Hajime gave the two of you.
You took your arms and swept Sonia up, along with your laughter.
"Oh! Oh my," she giggled. "You really do not need to. I can walk on my own."
"Sorry Sonia, but you’ve just got me so stunned I can’t seem to let you go.”
“Oh my, that seems like quite the horrible condition,” she giggled, “my condolences.”
“None of that. I mean, it only makes sense.” You grinned, touching your forehead to hers. “How could I not be stunned when my classmate happens to be so gosh damn cute?"
Her giggle went out sheepish. "My sincerest apologies, then. I’ve never put someone into paralysis like this before.”
you grinned, “I’d ask what method you normally use to paralyze people, but that’d ruin the moment. Now, onward!”
"Ah! Yes, into the fray! We shall paint this town red!"
You took off, racing ahead into the light, the two of you bursting into increasingly loud laughter.
When you were out of sight, Hajime sighed. "Everyone on this island is so weird...right, Nagito?"
Said boy stared into the distance you hauled Sonia off in. He had stopped walking, eyes disturbingly vacant and dark.
"...Nagito?"
"Hm?" He snapped out of it, an instant smile thrown in Hajime's direction. "What is it, Hajime?"
"Uh, never mind. It's nothing."
Inside the lush green of the farm pen, there was a little girl with smooth crescent pigtails poking her finger around in the grass. Outside the pen loitered a tan brunette, red skirted with what had to be the strongest button in the world attached to that white blouse. Those were some bazookas. Not to mention the muscle. She wasn't buff, but she was certainly toned.
As Hajime remarked upon the distinct lack of animals, prompting Usami to pop up in a cocoon of glittering pink. Hajime nearly fell over in his terror, and Usami turned a chicken into a cow. And so she left, leaving only confusion and speculation. Nagito suggested a magic trick, and, being the only semi-logical explanation, Hajime boarded that boat.
"Why don't we split up here? I'd imagine it'd get pretty crowded with so many people surrounding one person." said Nagito.
"You're not wrong..." Hajime said.
"We can go greet Akane. Why don't you start with Hiyoko, [Name]?" Nagito gestured to each mop of hair as he spoke.
"Whaaa..." you pouted. "I wanted the hot one first. Whatever."
Nagito beamed. "Come on, Sonia!"
"Huh?" she blinked. "But I—" she glanced at you, already chatting it up with the orange kimono girl. "...Oh. Right!"
Meanwhile, you weren't getting too many pleasant results.
"Heyyy..." you slid up behind her. "Sooo... I'm here for introductions. My name is [Name] [Surname]."
"Huuuuh? You wanna know my name?" she looked up at you, words round as her eyes. "It's Hiyoko Saionji..."
"Riggght... hm. What's with the kimono? Kinda weird for the first day of school." Then again, Mikan was wearing an apron, and Nekomaru was literally able to generate electricity from his eyes.
"Well, I'm the Ultimate Traditional Dancer. Hope's Peak told us to wear outfits related to our Ultimates for the first day." In an instant, her eyes darkened with malice, an ugly smirk twisting her face. "You really don't even know something like that? I should've known you were as stupid as you looked."
"Hey, well fuck you too! You look like a grade-schooler!"
She giggled. "Actually, I'm a Hope's Peak student! We're in the same boat together! You're such a dummy, big sis [Naaaame]!" She went back to pressing the dirt, like she didn't just start a war she wasn't escaping from. "One... two... three... four...!"
You bent down to get a closer look. "...Are those ants?"
"Duh!" She smugly puffed out her cheeks through her fingers. "Heeehee... When you press their tummies in the right spot they make this squishy sound!"
"Ew. Reminds me of your face."
"W... whaaa...?" she took back her hand, wavering eyes sinking into you. She pressed them to her hands. "T... that's horrible...! H—how could you say something so mean!?" She burst into tears and wails. "Y... you're awful! So awful! What did I ever do to you...!?"
You rolled your eyes, dusting off your lap as you straightened up, glaring down at her. "Come on. You said it yourself, you're a high schooler. Just because you look like you learned to walk a hot minute ago doesn't mean you can use that for a nice tantrum pass."
"WAAAAAHHHH! What the hell are you talking about!? You're awful, big sis! Disgusting! Stupid! I hope you die in a dirty ditch with the maggots!"
"I hope your frog legs get turned into taxidermy!"
She bawled even louder.
"Well," there was a chuckle behind you, "Are you sure that wasn't a threat?"
You spun around to face the awkwardly standing trio. Well, Nagito looked happy as ever.
You shrugged. "Eh. Not yet, at least."
"U—um, come on, [Name], don't you think that's a little cruel for a kid?" asked Hajime.
"Hey, she said it herself. She's a highschool—"
"WAAAAHHHHHHH!" Hiyoko burst into her loudest sob yet, wiping her eyes red as she ran behind Sonia's leg and gripped it, hiding like you were some feral beast.
"A—ah..." Sonia carefully crouched down, placing a hand on Hiyoko's head. "Are... are you alright? Can you speak?"
Hiccups choked through her words. The only decipherable, cracking little syllables were, "...[ame]... s... s-she...!" Gargled in between choked sobs.
"H—hey, hey, it is alright," Sonia hastily engulfed her in her arms, circling soothing fingers on her back. "I am sure [Name] did not mean anything by it..."
"Oh, I meant every word."
"You're not making yourself look any better," said Nagito.
"My fashion sense is great, thank you very much."
Hajime gave you a funny look. "You... you know you made her cry, right?"
Your brows furrowed, "…Don't tell me you're taking her side."
"I... I'm not saying I'm picking a side, I'm just saying... y'know..." he scratched his neck at your gaze, "...Don't you feel... bad? I mean, really..." he gestured to Sonia, who was giving you a worried stare, and Hiyoko, wrapped up in her arms, peering up at you with big, wet, red eyes.
"Nnngh..." Tears flowed again; a loud, sniffled sob, "W... why are you staring at me so meanly...!? W... wahhhhhh.... Uuuuuuugh....! I—I never did anything to you...!"
"Oh, you fucking—" At Hajime and Sonia's deepening gazes, you sucked in a sharp breath. "Come on! She says pretty rude things herself! You heard her before, right?"
"W—well, it's true, she does say some...perhaps, uncouth things..." said Sonia, gently patting Hiyoko as she cried into her shoulder. You could tell she was grimacing from the snot soaking her clothes. "But I am sure she does not mean any harm by them. It would be best to let it go, would it not...?"
"Are you kidding me? And just let her do whatever she wants?" You wheeled around, "Come on, Nagito! Say something! You don't seriously think Hiyoko's some innocent kid, do you?"
He beamed, "I plead the fifth."
"Hey, what kind of capitalist-crazed country do you think we're in?"
"...Ah, well, if I had to choose..." he stepped over toward Hajime and Sonia.
you blanched, "Seriously!?"
"Well, of course! I'd always support someone with as much talent as you guys!"
"What? No! Go back to capitalism!"
"So, um, what should we do about her...?" Hajime thumbed to Hiyoko.
Nagito rubbed his chin, "Well, you guys still haven't introduced yourself, right? We might as well start now..."
Hiyoko perked up, "W... without [Name], right?"
"You're not even trying!"
Nagito grinned, nodding, "yup! Completely, utterly, without her."
"Excuse you? Don't tell me what to do!"
"Didn't you want to talk to 'the hot one'?"
"Yeah, but when you tell me what to do, it makes me wanna do the opposite."
He sighed, slipping a hand into his pocket. After a bit of rummaging, he pulled out a plastic packet and threw it.
Instinctively, you caught it, examining the contents. "...Konpeitō?" You ran your fingers over the crumpled surface, colorful little vaguely flower-shaped candies peeking out at you from beneath. You scoffed, "Don't tell me you seriously think you can buy me with some shitty candy?"
You saw Hiyoko twitch from your peripheral. You knew it wasn't something the other two said.
A sinister idea crept into your mind. With the growing traces of a lopsided grin, you clutched the little packet.
"...Huh?" you paused. "This is... my mom's..."
"Huh?" said Nagito.
With furrowed brows, you locked eyes. "My mom runs a homemade bakery. She makes her own candies. Even has her own brand, even if it's not that popular. This is..." you raised the packet above your head, watching the rays of light seep through it like stained glass. "This isn't something she's released yet."
"W...wait, really?" said Hajime.
You fixed Nagito with a deep glare, "Why do you have this?"
He let out a little laugh-like sigh, "...I'm not sure. I found it in my pocket when I woke up."
"...You expect me to believe that?"
"...Didn't you say it yourself?" He smiled, "Don't assume things about people you don't know... truthfully, this is all I can tell you. Do you have any evidence to prove otherwise? If so, I'll gladly hear you out."
"...Tch," you clicked your tongue. "Fine." You stuffed it down your shirt.
Nagito blinked. "Tactful."
"Hey, it's not my fault they didn't put goddamn pockets on the uniform! Besides, this stuff's too sweet for me," you huffed. "Whatever. Might solve a mystery or something. Thanks, I guess."
He tilted his head.
"The deal was I leave now, right? Have fun with the stupid little shit."
You sped off as Hiyoko burst into another distressed wail.
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
"Heyyyyy..." you slid up to the brunette, lashes hiding the top half of your eyes, lips perking into a sly grin, "Whatcha dooiiiin'?"
"Huh?" She blinked. "...What's with the funny face yer' makin'?" Her brows furrowed, "kinda reminds me of my mom's boyfriends."
"Er—uh..." There was probably too much to unpack with that sentence. "My bad..." You wiped your face as if that would restart the conversation.
She arched a brow. "Huh?"
"Oh!" You lit up, snapping her a pair of finger guns, "Do you lift? Cuz I can see us working out."
This time she sparked. "...Oh! You mean you train? Are you strong?" She cracked her knuckles against her palm. "C'mon, then! Come at me! Let's have a good fight!"
You laughed, "Sooory! I would love to get beaten down by a macho chick like you, but I already had my fair share of grounding from Usami! School rules, remember?"
"Haaaaa?" She deflated. "I don't really get it, but we're not allowed to fight, huh? That's so lame... how am I supposed to get stronger then, huh!? Where do I test my skills!?"
"Well... we could start with social skills. I'm [Name] [Surname]. How bout you? And your talent?"
"Oh, right... I'm Akane Owari. Uhhhh.... they call me the Ultimate Gymnast... nice to meetcha!" She then scanned you up and down. "Hm...you don't look like too much...but my gut's gotta good feelin' about ya. So, when we make it off this place, let's loosen up with a nice fight, yeah?"
You snorted. "Eh, sure. Why not. Although, you could probably just beat the shit out of me with your coolness."
She blinked. "Heh," her cheeks lifted into a grin. "...Thanks!"
¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>>*Obtained Hope Fragment.*<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤
Ding dong ding dong!
You met back up with the trio. Sonia gave you a pitying smile.
“Byakuya said gather back on the beach when we're done..." said Nagito.
“Really? I could’ve sworn he said ‘gather in the pits of Tartarus.”
“Should we not be heading off soon...? Ah... has Hiyoko left us too?” Sonia searched around, realizing Hiyoko had scurried off when she wasn't looking.
“...Why are you guys so okay with this?” Hajime said. "They're—They're expecting us to murder each other!"
Nagito crossed his arms. “Well, it doesn’t make much sense just to stand here and worry.”
“Um, yes, it does.” You said.
“Why are you agreeing with me? You’re also weirdly okay with this!”
“Come on guys. How about we walk and argue?” Nagito said, ushering everyone forward.
You scoffed but complied. “Do I really have to explain myself to you? Like, yeah. I can comprehend why you’re worried, I’m not stupid. Besides, logically, it makes sense for us to stand here and worry. You’re just that kind of bitch!”
Hajime glared in front of him. “Then why aren’t you worried? There are so many things wrong with this! Am I the only one with a bad feeling about the murder rules?”
“Eh. Suspicious or not, it’s gonna happen anyway. You’re not better or smarter than us for feeling bad, Hajime.”
“I’m not saying that!”
“Well, you’re clearly implying it. Just because the same weird shit happened to all of us doesn’t mean we need to get all fidgety about it like you. Sure, it’s sketchy. Might as well milk as much enjoyment from it as possible while we can, then, right?”
“So you’re just… going to ignore the danger?”
“Psh, this is completely different. When we go back home, do you want your memories of this place to be weighed down by a complete dumpster fire of thoughts?”
“Or, what if we never return home, and our families are desperately trying to reason with our kidnappers over ransom right now! Am I the only one who’s noticing the teleporting bunny that operates on pure tech…?”
“Okay, fair. That could happen. Or it couldn’t. We’re trusting that it won’t.”
“You can’t be serious!”
“Well, if they had enough money to build Usami, they’re probably well-off enough on their own.” Nagito brought up.
"I believe a country like Novoselic could pull a stunt like this off...really, it would be more about skill and influence rather than money.” Sonia added, and no one knew if she realized she was incriminating herself.
“Look, that’s not the point here. It’s the unknown factor in the first place that’s supposedly dangerous.”
“You’re switching sides again!”
“What? No, I’m just saying what I think. This isn’t a courtroom debate, Hajime. You people always have to make everything so complicated!”
Hajime’s face was weathered with exasperation and sweat as you reached the grass of a palm tree.
“You three are the last ones here. What took you so long?”
“Haha! Sorry, Byakuya. We didn’t mean to keep you waiting.”
“Whatever… more importantly, this is our chance to discuss the situation among ourselves.”
And you did, starting with first impressions of the island. You talked about the sealed-off bridges on the central island, Ibuki thought they were for not getting lost, which brought up how dauntingly big this island might’ve really been. Then you all went around sharing the locations you explored before Teruteru made it uncomfortable. Fucker.
Byakuya degraded all of you for not picking up on a ‘big observation’, which confirmed that this island was indeed called Jabberwock island (as if that weren’t super obvious from the sign he was standing next to the entire time). He ended it with some incomplete cryptic sentence on said island.
And then, somehow, the topic transitioned into the severity and circumstances of the situation. You sighed. Poor Hajime. He tried to protest with some sort of log-raft to escape before getting absolutely shut down by his peers.
“I suggest you stop now. While we aren't required to do anything, we have no idea what happens if we break the rules. There’s a chance you will endanger the entire group by doing something foolish. Is that what you want?” Byakuya said.
“I… I never said anything about danger! I would never do such a thing!”
“Hajime… I get how you feel, but I think you should calm down,” Nagito said.
"Yeah, no need to get your panties in a goddamn pretzel."
Mikan stuttered, “a… anyway, it doesn’t look like there’s any danger unless we do something weird…”
Hajime scowled. “Do you really believe that…?”
Byakuya pushed up his glasses. “We have no choice to believe it. At least for now.”
"Hey hey, guys! Check it out! Free swimsuits!" Everyone followed Ibuki's voice to the obnoxiously red and blue bags strewn out on the sand.
“Swimming bags?” said Hajime.
Kazuichi seemed rather excited about this prospect. “Whaaaaa… that means…!”
"We get to have a beach day!" Sonia pondered, bristling with excitements.
“You guys are all going to put on swimsuits and play around…? Right now…?”
You exaggeratedly rolled your eyes at Hajime.
"Well, it'd probably be nice to get a break from everything right now..." yawned Chiaki. "Besides, being at the beach with my new class doesn't sound like such a bad situation..."
“W… who’d wanna play on the beach in the place? No one would agree to just jump into the ocean when we don’t even know how we got here…!” He proceeded, into an onslaught of everyone doing the opposite of that.
With peppy moods, most people dug swimwear with oddly specific measurements tailored to each person and ran to the hotel to change. After changing, you took a quick stop at Rocketpunch Market for some extra necessities like snorkels and goggles before speeding back.
Most of your classmates were already splashing around in the sea.
You returned just in time to watch Teruteru get baited with his own lotion scheme. But then it sort of turned back around on him, as, apparently, Nekomaru was well within his range. God, what a scary midget.
“...And once again I am reminded that I’m surrounded by weirdos…” You dropped down onto the shore, the sharp chill sending a tremor all the way to the base of your head.
“And yet again, you forget you constitute as one yourself…” Your head snapped around to glare at the offending mutterer: Hajime.
“Is there something you wanna say to my face, cuckfuck?”
His head stayed averted to you. “No…”
You arched a brow. His cheek was smooshed pitifully into his palm, staring vacantly out at the dry gold horizon. "...Alright," you sighed, scooting yourself up next to him. "I'm biting. What's wrong?"
“Nothing...” He turned his gaze away.
"You know, this attitude offends me too. What kinda dumbass do you take me for?"
"...a beyond average one?"
"I won't hesitate to sock you."
"Okay, okay! Jeez, sorry..."
"As if I give a shit about such a half-assed apology. Don't tell me—is this about how 'carefree' everyone is?"
"Hey, I heard those air quotes. And—and I'm serious! This includes you! How can you just—! ...Don't you get it!? This isn't normal at all! At the very least, there's something really concerning going on, it's literally written out in the rules! Aren't you worried, at least in the slightest bit?"
You snorted. "Wow, Hajime, I didn't realize you were that against the furry community."
"That's not it! Seriously!" Hajime burst, grabbing at his head. He groaned into his hands. "Ugh... just... forget it. It's not—I'm not—" he curled even closer into himself, "...whatever. Really, just... forget I said anything..."
"Are..." you blinked, "...are you...crying?"
"No!" He scraped at his eyes. It was definitely damp. "I'm just...frustrated! I...I have—allergies! I'm just allergic!"
"To what, being a cuck?"
"Shut up!" He rubbed his fingers into his eyes. "Just... just leave me alone. I know this is stupid, okay?"
You cast a glance up ahead, to the joyous laughter of your classmates. Then back to the curled and pathetic Hajime.
"...Hey. Look. Um..." You put a hand on his back, searching for a nice set of words for this situation.
He was so pathetic it was starting to make you uncomfortable. You didn't know what you were expecting, talking about feelings and fears and stupid shit, but... people were supposed to comfort each other, right? Making each other feel good about themselves was how they got closer. But... Hajime obviously wasn't even into you. So why did he even try to talk to you? What was he trying to gain?
It wasn't like you were going to go out of your way to pretend and be all sappy and cuddly for him. You didn't recall ever giving that impression. After all, who cared about the feelings of some completely unimpressive normie?
"...Does it really make you this upset we aren't as paranoid as you?" Looked like that wasn't a good choice of words, as he shook off your hand.
"No!" He withered, burying his gaze into the sand with defeat wriggled into his posture. "...It... it's just... I dunno... it's—it's a stupid feeling, really... like... being small? Invisible? I—I don't know... like... no one's really listening to you?" His hands moved to clutch his elbows, nails digging into the skin. His gaze was buried in the sand. "Like—like you're insane for being suspicious about anything? I don't know... I'm not trying to bring down the mood, really... I just... I don't know...' he shook his head. "...Sorry. Maybe this really is stupid."
You stared at him. "...I'm gonna fuckin slap you."
"What—why!?"
"I...! I dunno, you're pissing me off!"
"I didn't even do anything!"
"Exactly! You just—" You pinched the bridge of your nose. Deep breaths. This was obviously not the way to handle this. Psychology 101, [Name]. Come on, you already know this stuff. "So... you're upset. Because... you think no one cares about the situation, and it makes you feel isolated. Unseen?"
"I guess..."
"And..." you hummed. "This makes you frustrated."
"No, it makes me feel like rainbows and sunshine."
"You're running thin on my patience. Watch it."
"Hey, I can't help it. You're just so... bad at this. It's like watching a car accident in slow motion." He sighed. "I'm sorry. It's my fault for dumping all this on you... Just go have fun with everyone else. I'll be fine."
"Nah. I'm bored. This is honestly the most thought provoking thing I've had to do all day, actually..." you rubbed your chin. When you put it that way... this could be an interesting thing to figure out. What did Hajime want you to say?
"Really?" He rolled his eyes. "Sitting in the sand with a loser nobody knows is more interesting than hanging out with a class of Ultimates?"
"Huh. Yeah, I guess so," you said simply, causing him to look away. "I guess you're just one interesting loser than, huh?"
"I..." he snorted, confused. "You're such an asshole..."
"It's your fault for being so bearable," you winked.
"All I've done is complain..."
"Complaints are healthy for the soul," you chimed. "...Okay. Look. Hajime, you're a good guy. Pathetic, decent looks. And it's in your right to feel whatever you feel, no exceptions. And people should hear you out. You're very sensible. In like, a grounded way. It's probably very natural to be weirded out by what's going on right now. I'm pretty sure everyone else was just as weirded out as you were appearing on this island. But they're different people. They shoved that down, deciding just to look on the island part of this. Just enjoy it while it lasts. And, it's fair not everyone has that mindset. But it also makes sense that kind of attitude would brush off any negativity thrown at them. So... it's not your fault. Everyone's got a few dumb friends. Everyone just wants to have a good time."
"I... guess so..." He hid his face with his fist. "I guess it's harsh to think they're crazy."
"We're all a little crazy, Hajime. There's just happens to be a little dumber. Everyone's got stupid friends. I mean, it's no secret this class is a little... eccentric." You air quoted. "So, you're actually the most sane out of all the Ultimates. But I think we all collectively know we don't have to go along with what these stupid rules want us to do."
"I have nothing to show for myself, though... I don't even remember my own talent."
You lifted a brow. He was wearing most of the male's Reserve Course Uniform, so you just assumed he was a normie trying to blend in. Wasn't like you were going to ruin his fun, but why would he keep up this charade with you, another Reserve Course Student? Well, you supposed you did come off as the gossipy type.
"Who cares about that? You think I talk to you cuz you're a mystery, or something? Or because you might have this super secret cool hidden magic power? I talk to you because you're you. And you're easy to talk to. And I fuck with that. Literally. Sanity is a pretty cool trait to have, alright? I mean, just look at me."
He snorted. "Whatever you want to think. But I guess, yeah... you don't feel anything being in these guys' presence?"
"Why should I care? I'm me. And you're you. And that's plenty. And considering you're like, one of the only sane people on this island, that makes you pretty special in your own right. I mean, just wait till the day we find a corpse right here and you get to be like I fucking told you so! right in all of their smug faces."
He punched you with a light laugh. "Seriously, don't even joke about that kinda stuff..."
"Aw, what? Are you gonna get scared? Paranoid, even?"
"You suck."
"Oh, come on, you know you love it."
"I guess... I kind of do, yeah."
You blinked organs stopping for a hot second. "...Huh?"
He hummed sliding a crooked grin your way. "Oh, are we getting hesitant all of a sudden? Or perhaps, even... embarrassed? What's to be shy about, almighty (Name)?"
You scowled, defensiveness wrapping you in its sharp angry fist. "Go fuck yourself. I'm just thinking about how annoying it'll be to hide your body."
"You're terrible."
You stuck out your tongue. "You talk with terrible."
He laughed, filtering a deep ocean breath through his nose as he leaned back. "Thanks for listening to me through this, even if it's all this super sappy, emotional stuff. You're... a good friend. I'm glad I met you."
"...Uh... yeah, no prob, Jimmy," you coughed. Huh? You barely even helped him. Mostly belittled him, even. If anything, you should've made him more paranoid.
Why was he still here, then?
"You're... a good friend... I'm glad I met you."
...Friend, huh?
You cracked a grin. Hajime's gaze softened at the sight.
That didn't sound half bad.
"Or, no. Thanks."