A new visitor
Bucky made the night. But he stayed in coma for the following days and each further day made Clint visibly more anxious and stressed.
He started to skip the big meal-gatherings with everyone and developed his own daily routine instead. Very early in the morning he got up for training. He had asked T’Challa if there was a place where he could practice shooting and combat training undisturbed. He was given a large room in the castle and stayed there for a good couple of hours. Sometimes T’Challa would join him and they fought with each other for a while. Steve had also offered Clint to do the fighting training together but Clint politely rejected.
It had appeared within the first couple of days after Bucky’s surgery that he suddenly couldn’t stand watching Steve and Tony acting as a couple anymore. He felt guilty about it because – what were they supposed to do? They were a couple and had every right to act as such but somehow it gave Clint’s heart a little twinge every time they shared a kiss. It made him so very aware of what he didn’t have right now and sometimes, in very dark moments, he thought that he might never ever have it again.
After the training he took a quick shower and then just before the palace awoke, he tiptoed into Bucky’s hospital-like room. It was way more comfortable furnished than an actual hospital room but the clinical overtone couldn’t be covered entirely. Clint hated hospitals. He had spent way too much time in them and the surrounding always triggered bad childhood memories. He had asked for being let alone as he visited Bucky for the first time and he was glad he made that decision. He had cried a lot as he had seen his fiancée laying in this horrible white metal bed, connected to way to many cables and equipment that made annoying beeping noises. But the breathing hose had been the worst. Clint couldn’t even explain why but just seeing Bucky who always seemed so strong being connected to a medial ventilator just wasn’t right.
But by the time he also got used to that. Now he came every morning to just sit next to Bucky’s bed. Sometimes he read 1920s children’s books to him but most of the time he just talked to him. About everything. His worries, his fears, his love for Bucky and sometimes – if he was in the mood – even funny anecdotes or bad jokes that made him laugh more than he actually wanted.
During all of that he held Bucky’s right hand. Which was also the only one possible because Tony and Shuri had managed to dismount Bucky’s metal arm during surgery. Now Bucky lay there with a big fluffy bandage around his shoulder that was changed every day. They had taken off the arm – and Clint was certain that it would transfer Tony into orgasmic spheres to disassemble it and get behind its technical function – but unfortunately the hadn’t been able to get all the metal out of Bucky’s shoulder because Hydra, in its own day, had forced it too deep into his flesh.
***
It was 3 a.m. Clint was sleeping restlessly. His upper body had sunken down onto Bucky’s bed and his head rested on the blanket. Their fingers were still entangled. He murmured something unintelligibly as a warm hand slowly shoved itself up his neck. Clint startled and span around, ready to fight, but he was stopped in his movements by two slim yet strong arms who held him in a tight hug.
“Clint! Stop fighting, it’s me!”
Clint squirmed and writhed until he finally realised who was holding him.
“Nat?!”
“Hey” she smiled and Clint immediately returned the hug.
“But when? It’s in the middle of the night… how- how did you-“ he babbled while taking in her scent and the welcoming warmth of her body.
It hit him in this very moment just how much he had missed her and he bet she felt the same. Natasha cupped his face in her hands and brought their lips together. Clint sighed into the kiss. How much he had missed these lips, these hands, this woman. He pulled her closer and they both lost themselves in the kiss. Her hand trailed up his neck and she ran her fingers through his hair.
“God Natasha…” Clint whispered on her lips.
“Fuck, I missed you so much! We both did!” he said and pulled the hug even tighter – he felt like he was about to cry. She only hummed and clung to him.
“How is he?” Natasha asked after they eventually moved apart.
“Well… he’s stable so far. But Stephen can tell you more. Yesterday he said something about that they wanna start the waking up process soon” Clint said and sadness welled up in his chest as Natasha leaned down to kiss Bucky on the forehead.
“Sleeping beauty…” she murmured and wiped her eyes. Natasha seldomly cried. And even more seldomly in front of other people but right it was only the three of them.
It had always been the three of them. When Clint had lost his hearing, when Bucky recovered, when Natasha got so heavily affected by Loki’s manipulation.
They stayed with Bucky for another hour, mainly just holding his hand or caressing his cheeks. Natasha told them a little bit about the mission she had been on and Clint in return informed her about what had happened since they had the video call in the jet when they were flying to Wakanda. Eventually Clint could barely hold his eyes open any longer whereupon they decided to go to Clint and Bucky’s apartment. They made out with each other and for a brief moment there was the idea that they were sleeping together but both were too tired in the end. So Natasha snuggled up behind Clint and wrapped one arm around him while he was already drifting into a calm sleep.
***
The next morning Clint attended the gathered breakfast for the first time in four weeks, in fact since Bucky was put into artificial coma.
“I feel a bit guilty for avoiding them for so long to be honest…” he admitted to Natasha as they were walking to the dining hall.
“Clint, they know why you did this. No one is blaming you!”
They entered the hall. It was as busy as usual.
Steve came up to them, welcoming Natasha with a big smile and a warm hug.
“Oh guys, you look so tired!” Tony’s voice sounded over from the kitchen counter.
“We uhm… we didn’t catch much sleep last night…” Clint mumbled.
“Hey, man of iron! Bring the archer his usual bottle of coffee!” Thor called and Clint gratefully took his liquid gold that Tony handed him and thanked Thor with a nod.
Some people like T’Challa, Shuri and Wanda had already left the hall either for some important royal business or to take care of Bucky. Natasha and Clint found two chairs next to Stephen who was involved into a deep discussion with Bruce about a level of science that was just too high for Clint. They ate their scrambled eggs silently, both lost in thought but by the fourth cup of coffee Clint’s brain slowly started to work again.
Bruce had gotten up to get another toast so Clint took his chance and refilled Stephen his Earl Grey tea.
“Oh, thank you, Clint!” Stephen smiled.
“Actually I wanted to ask you something…” Clint said and Natasha continued.
“We were wondering what you can tell us about Bucky’s waking up process.”
Stephen empties his cup of tea and leaned back before he answered.
“So… it seems like Bucky has recovered from the major surgery that we performed. But the recovery phase also depends on his how long and how deep he has been in an induced coma, his age – although considering he's a super soldier, I guess it doesn't matter too much. Furthermore it depends on his general state of health and how well his body breaks down the medication we gave him to put him into this long-term anaesthesia. The artificial respiration usually remains in place for a while during the recovery phase. This is because the respiratory muscles have regressed during the time Bucky was in an artificial coma and can now no longer work independently. He must be weaned off the ventilator step by step and train their respiratory muscles. The length of this weaning process varies – for ordinary mortals it may take several months before they are able to breathe on their own again-“
“Several months??” Clint gasped and Natasha, who had laid her hand on his shoulder squeezed it.
“However, since Bucky has the serum running in his system, I guess we can bisect the time wherefore he’d be attached to the breathing hose for no longer than two weeks. By the way – if you can, bring him some familiar things like music or smells he likes. It has a positive effect on the recovery phase. He might be in a condition called ‘delirium’. That means he most likely will be quite disorientated and most things will be strange for him. All this means enormous stress for his body. And to prevent the his blood pressure from skyrocketing or to prevent him from endangering himself by uncontrollably removing catheters and drains, especially given his strength, painkillers and sedatives can be used in the recovery phase too. ”
“…okay uhm.. that’s uh.. a lot to process. Thank you, Stephen, honestly!” Clint mumbled. “When do you guys start?”