Grand Disguises
04
“You reside in grand disguises just to get away from it all.”
“Cut! That was great, Lucy, take a ten minute break and then we'll shoot along with Akutagawa-kun.”
The initial day kicks off with Charlotte Mikage's return home to Japan. Consequently, Lucy's schedule begins with an individual photo shoot at the airport at 8:45, followed by another at 9:30 in a cafe that is nearly an hour away from the estate. To make matters worse, she needs to be there by 10 o'clock sharp.
The moment she arrives, seven minutes late, the actress is rushed to have her hair and makeup touched up. Then, she is pulled into the tea room and ordered to sit in a seiza position for nearly three takes and retakes. As an American who had only sat in that position twice before, Lucy concludes that this first morning of filming was truly the worst in her entire career.
Next up is her shoot with Akutagawa, the scene that marks the beginning of Charlotte and Yui's ill-fated romance. Things are still somewhat awkward between them, and to Lucy's surprise, it's she who feels awkward. She has never had any trouble chatting away when in the company of just about anyone. Yet, in Akutagawa's presence, she feels slightly intimidated. He speaks to her normally, but Lucy can tell he's only being polite to avoid creating tension when they have to work so closely together. His interactions feel rehearsed, as if he has all the responses memorised in advance. Moreover, there's nothing genuine about the friendliness he displays; it seems as if he only does it to appear likeable and nothing more.
To Lucy, Akutagawa’s behaviour isn't much out of the ordinary; she often catches herself engaging in similar actions from time to time as well. Yet, it does feel odd being when on the receiving end for once.
As she waits near her own trailer for Director Fitzgerald's call, Lucy observes Akutagawa peeking out from the door of his own trailer. After casting a quick glance around, he releases a sigh of relief before stepping out and making his way towards her. However, he hesitates for a moment, contemplating something, before abruptly changing his direction.
“He must have seen me coming.”
Lucy's attention is fixated on Akutagawa's actions, so she is slightly startled by Atsushi's voice.
"I had a feeling," Lucy remarks. "I thought you mentioned that things would be different this week."
Atsushi offers a wry grin. "Well, we did have a somewhat significant moment over the weekend, so I assumed he wouldn't be as distant today."
Lucy, too drained to attempt to decipher the meaning behind Atsushi's enigmatic smile and words, leaves her friend to contemplate his own thoughts. She makes her way back across the street towards the estate — as expected, Akutagawa is already there, engaged in his usual conversation with Naomi.
He seems natural talking to the girl —a given with them being close friends— and Lucy can't help but want to intrude their conversation just to watch his demeanour change.
As she gets a bit closer, their dialogue becomes clear enough to hear Naomi telling Akutagawa, “Kunikida has to take Kenji to practise so we can't go there tonight.”
“Let's go to Dazai’s then. I need to get my phone there anyway, I left it behind on Saturday night.”
“Ew no, Dazai’s apartment has clothes and underwear all over the place.”
Lucy scrunches her nose. “I did not need to know that..” She thinks.
“That Russian friend he told us about is coming to visit. The place is so unbelievably spotless, you would never say someone like Dazai lives there.” Akutagawa bemuses. “And he did it all himself, Naomi, I watched him.”
Naomi snickers. “You sure he didn't just shove it all in the guest room?”
“Where would his guest sleep?”
“Akutagawa…”
At this point, Lucy decides to butt in. “Dazai sounds like quite the character.”
Her interjection comes as a surprise to the pair. Naomi easily brushes off her shock and laughs, explaining to Lucy that their friend is indeed an odd one. Lucy listens and responds, from the corner of her eyes she sees Akutagawa mutter a soft “Oh…” upon seeing her.
And there it is again, he subtly draws himself into an invisible box and plasters on an expression so tactful you would never be able to tell that he has no desire to be in the same company as you in that moment. It's a mystery to Lucy how someone like him can have the friends he has.
“Is it true that he was offered a role in the show?” Lucy inquires, curious about the actor Dazai Osamu who supposedly “wasted” his talents by retiring at such an early age.
Naomi’s face softens. “He already rejected them.” Is all she answers with.
“Anyway, Montgomery-san, I’m certain you're not the type but-”
“Don't worry about it, I won't tip off the tabloids about Dazai’s apparent lack of order and ways of getting people into bed with him.” They both chuckle.
“ Oh…” Her comment casts a lightbulb above Akutagawa's head. His face morphs from perplexed, to astonished, to disgusted. “I did not need to know that.
That's probably the most she's seen him do in the entire week they've been together.
“Come to think of it, Naomi-san, you don't have any scenes today, do you? What made you decide to come on a day off?”
Naomi sends a quick glare to Akutagawa. “I intended to sleep in but someone barged into my apartment at 6am saying that his manager is sick and there's no one else to go with him.” She scowls.
The “someone” in question feigns ignorance, putting on a stunned look as if to say he has no clue who that person is, but they must be a terrible friend to do such a thing.
Luckily, he is saved from having to explain himself by the cameraman who calls out, “Two minutes until shooting! Akutagawa, Montgomery, on set please!”
Lucy beams at her co-star. “Shall we go then?”
“...yes, let's.”
They bid their goodbyes to Naomi, Akutagawa assuring her that he will join her outside once they have wrapped up. Then, they make their way towards the bridge.
Charlotte steps out of the main residence, tired and frustrated from the long discussion with her father over her future plans.
It's an age-old grievance between any father and daughter within their social class; Charlotte wants to continue travelling, further her studies, inherit Mikage Corp. and find love in her own time, Hyoma wants her to settle in Japan, get married and start a family. She wishes her father would see that she is far more capable of inheriting his business than Reiji is. Her brother is lax, irresponsible and ignorant, allowing him to take over will only bring doom to the Mikage family.
Today, just when she finally thought she was getting through to him, her father only agreed to consider her as the heir under the condition that she marry Hayashi Kaito —a childhood friend of hers and Reiji’s and the heir to one of their business partners.
Charlotte doesn't notice the man approaching from the opposite direction until they collide.
“What the-”
Great. Her first day back and already some bastard from the branch family is trying their hand at a “coincidental” meeting. She glances up to see the face of whoever it is that dared to get in her way.
Not a family member. At least, not anyone she's familiar with.
The man is only slightly taller than she is. Long black hair that looks as if it were dipped halfway through in white dye, tied up in a short ponytail. He's wearing a suit, the kind their bodyguards wear, which answers the question of who this man is.
He’s just as stoic as the rest of the bodyguards, but Charlotte can see something else in his expression. Something…painful?
The man speaks; soft, raspy, a little sexy if she's being honest. “Could you…my foot.”
Now’s not the time to be thirsty, Charlotte. She pulls herself together. “Excuse me?”
“You're standing on my foot…”
Charlotte looks down, and just as the man says, she is indeed standing on his foot, with her heels.
She steps back and awkwardly apologises, feeling guilty over having ever considered telling him off for attempting an faux accidental run in with her. Looking at him now, he really doesn't seem like the type.
The man only nods his head, bows once, then walks past her to get to the main residence. Charlotte, too, continues on her way out to her own residence.
And that is the last time they see each other for the next two months.
“Stare any harder and you'll burn holes into the screen.”
Atsushi only stands up and leads the way to Lucy’s car without paying attention to her comment. She spots Akutagawa walking not too far from them peering around in search of Naomi. It's almost adorable how anxious he seems when one of his friends isn't within an arm's length distance from him.
“I wanna drive.”
Fascinating how Atsushi’s carefreeness pops back out the second he steps off the filming site.
Lucy sighs. “Not happening.”
“I got my licence back last week!”
He receives a deadpan stare in response. The last thing Lucy wants is for her car to end up ploughed into the side of a building, not that Atsushi is a reckless driver, but he hasn't been behind the wheel in one full year —two if you consider his hiatus. And Lucy's current car isn't exactly her own, she's had to rent one until hers arrives from America.
“Chuuya would let me.” Atsushi grumbles, seating himself on the passenger's side.
“Chuuya-san doesn't even let you ride the train by yourself.”
“...Yosano would.”
Lucy only knows so much about Yosano Akiko, but based on what she has seen, “I suppose she would, yes.”
One reason why Lucy was rather hesitant to accept Atsushi’s request for a lift home is because Atsushi lives in Meguro while Lucy's hotel is in Shibuya, thus it would take a twenty minute drive from Shinjuku to Meguro and then another nine back to Shibuya. She’ll be driving for almost half an hour when all she wants is to take a dip in her suite’s massive bathtub and perhaps fall asleep inside —Mark would surely have her head if he finds out she's done it again but being in America he'll never know.
Alas, Nakahara Chuuya and Yosano Akiko both had clashing schedules that kept them from staying too long on set and there was no certainty they'd be back in time to take Atsushi home, so Lucy offered her help. Taking public transport alone would only cause trouble for her friend, after all.
Another reason is…
“Hey.”
“Hm?” Atsushi’s eyes are glued to his phone, smiling at a text.
“Saturday.”
That alone is enough to make him swivel so fast Lucy worried he may get whiplash. “What about it?” He asks innocently.
“After you got home from that art gallery you said ‘I think Akutagawa won't ignore me anymore’ yet today he tried even harder to stay away from you.”
Atsushi hums, sounding a little disappointed. “That's what I thought but turns out it was just me who had fun.”
It's a little sad seeing him make that face. After all, Lucy knows what Akutagawa really means to Atsushi. “Of course it was just you. You have a tendency to drag people around without consideration.”
Atsushi grins.
Dazai leaned over the kitchen island, propping his elbows on the smooth surface and cradling his face in his hands. A devious smile played on his lips as he gazed at the two younger individuals seated across from him, his eagerness palpable.
“Did Akutagawa tell you what he did this weekend? How he showed up at my apartment at midnight when he should've been here much earlier ?”
As they had planned, Akutagawa and Naomi made a beeline for Dazai's residence right after work. Along the way Naomi mentioned that she looked forward to finally meeting their friend’s enigmatic Russian companion they had heard so much about. However, upon arriving at the house, they discovered that only Dazai was home, and apparently, the other man was occupied with touring the school where he would soon start teaching.
When interrogated for more information, Dazai quickly switched the subject to Akutagawa’s eventful weekend.
“He didn't but Jun mentioned that in the middle of the event he suddenly dashed outside with some guy.” Naomi quips. “I wonder who…”
They both turn to Akutagawa, eyes sparkling with curiosity and mischief.
Akutagawa resigns with a huff. “I bumped into Atsushi at the exhibit. He knows Tachihara.”
The two aren't surprised by this, they already knew that much. What they want is to hear what happened afterwards.
•••
09/06 [Last Saturday]
After leaving Gin’s exhibit, Atsushi and Akutagawa run almost halfway down the street, narrowly avoiding bumping into other pedestrians following the same or opposite route on the pavement. Ironically, the feeling of wind hitting his face as they sprinted was far less graceful than movies make it out to be. As refreshing as it was to have some semblance of air blowing against him —albeit said air was rather warm— during the unpleasant humidity of that day, by the end of their run he was completely out of breath and felt sticky under the clothes he wore. Atsushi, too, ended up removing his cap and mask at some point for a bit of relief.
Eventually they took a break near a convenience store where Atsushi entered promptly and exited holding an ice-cream for himself and a slushy for Akutagawa.
•••
“Hehe, how did he know that you don't eat ice-cream?”
“Shut up if you wanna hear the end of this.”
•••
At Atsushi's request, they decided to venture deeper into the area, taking a leisurely walk. Though initially hesitant, Akutagawa eventually relented, realising he had no other engagements and his meeting with Dazai was still a good four hours away.
Fortunately there were no more run-ins with fans or passerby who recognised them and it made their walk a lot more peaceful despite the grating voice at the back of Akutagawa’s mind telling him to turn around and wait for Gin at the exhibit.
“You can go back if you want.” Atsushi suddenly stated, as if he could read Akutagawa’s mind. “I dragged you out without your consent and coaxed you into taking a walk even though I know you're not very fond of my company.”
Atsushi's sheepish words struck a pang of guilt within Akutagawa. Deep down, he badly wanted to retreat and pretend that his encounter with Atsushi had never happened. However, it was too late for that; he had already committed to continuing that far, and the distance back to the gallery seemed daunting from where they currently stood.
The urge to refute Atsushi's statement gnawed at him, but saying the words "You're wrong" would only be a blatant lie, and both of them were acutely aware of it. Instead he says:
“That's true, I’d rather not be here right now.”
Naturally, Atsushi felt dejected after hearing that.
Akutagawa continued. “Still, from the beginning I planned to look around the area to pass time, I suppose having someone join me wouldn't be bad.”
He lied. It's a big, obvious lie spawned from guilt, but it's better than the other lie he almost told and Atsushi instantly perks back up after hearing it.
“Then, can I take you to a few places I know about?” He pleaded keenly. “I come here often so I’m very familiar with the hole in the wall spots where we won't be recognised.”
Akutagawa sees the younger’s almost sparkling eyes and immediately feels even worse than before. He nods in reply. “Alright, but I have somewhere to be at six, so we can't be long.”
“Got it!”
•••
“And that's what happened.”
As the recollection came to a close, a shared expression of concern settled upon the faces of Naomi and Dazai. At that moment, Akutagawa couldn't help but wish that he had never revealed the details to them.
He could discern their thoughts, their unspoken empathy, and it weighed heavily on him.
Dazai doesn't let him wallow for too long, though. The older man stands up, claps his hands together and smiles as he gestures to the doorway. “Okay, storytime is over. I need you guys gone now.”
“What? No, we wanna meet Fyodor!” Naomi protests.
“You will not. Escort yourselves out, thanks.”
At the same time, Atsushi finishes narrating the exact tale to Lucy, yet unlike Akutagawa’s friends, the redhead laughs out loud when she hears the end of it.
“You cunning bastard.” She howls. “Trust you to use someone’s guilt against them.”
Atsushi snickers, amused but not condescending. He does feel bad for that.
“Well, it's him who decided to ghost me so suddenly. He racked up that regret all by himself.”