guess who actually made the gc in the first place
8:57 P.M.
Spider Noir added milesmorales, gwandaa, hobiebrwn, pavprabhakar, margobabes<3, and penini to the group chat
Spider Noir: get applesauced i know how technology works now
milesmorales: what the f—
gwandaa: you are literally the LAST person i'd expect to make a gc
gwandaa: also we're chillin in different dimensions how did you even make this work
Spider Noir: oh that wasn't me that was peni
penini: hi guyssss!!!! :DDDD
milesmorales: hi peni!
margobabes<3: new phone who dis
milesmorales: are you acquainted with a certain Spider Noir
margobabes<3: yea i know the guy, why?
milesmorales: you'll never guess who made the gc
margobabes<3: NOOOO FCKIN WAYYY
margobabes<3: @Spider Noir BABE?!?!!
milesmorales: babe?
gwandaa: it's an expression, you wouldn't understand
milesmorales: what, because i'm black?
gwandaa: one, that's funny, two, margo's also black so nice try, and three, it's a girl thing
milesmorales: well i tried :/.
Spider Noir: hello margo 👋
margobabes<3: oh my god, he's using emojis
margobabes<3: this must be a sign that the spiderverse is collapsing
margobabes<3: we must alert miguel
milesmorales: oop shes talking about telling miguel, that's how i know your joking
margobabes<3: *you're
milesmorales: :P
Spider Noir: don't be overdramatic, kess, i have free range to do what i want with my discovery of emojis
gwandaa: ngl i kinda thought you'd type professionally if you ever found out how to use messaging
gwandaa: like uppercase letters at the beginning of each sentence
gwandaa: and proper use of commas
gwandaa: and lots of old timer grammar and slang
gwandaa: and ending then with a period
margobabes<3: PERIODT
Spider Noir: i do this to spite people
Spider Noir: mostly that old o'hara chap
hobiebrwn: nice
milesmorales: eyyy, wassup homie
hobiebrwn: hey up miles
hobiebrwn: you made this gc?
milesmorales: no
hobiebrwn: so gwendy did this?
milesmorales: nuh uh
hobiebrwn: margie? pav?
milesmorales: take a WIIIILD guess
Spider Noir: it was me, with the help of peni
Spider Noir: why is it such a big deal
hobiebrwn: YOU made this? come off it
Spider Noir: once again, why is it such a big deal
gwandaa: it's a big deal cus you're an old man
margobabes<3: LMAOOOOO
Spider Noir: shut up white girl 🖕
milesmorales: not the finger XD
hobiebrwn: oh he done call you a white girl
gwandaa: you're literally white too old timer
Spider Noir: what are you talking about, little lady, i'm grey
gwandaa: bffr now
Spider Noir: what
gwandaa: exactly
margobabes<3: @penini what have you been feeding him like?????
penini: what are you talking abt he feeds me not the other way around
margobabes<3: he lost his emo old man touch what happened
Spider Noir: im NOT old
gwandaa: notice how he's not denying that he's emo
Spider Noir: i dont even know what that word means
penini: oop sorry bout that my universe may have been a slightly bad influence on him
milesmorales: and by universe you mean you
penini: yeah that too
gwandaa: it's a wonder pav hasn't notice this yet
gwandaa: we're noisy af
hobiebrwn: pavi's still sleepin that's why
milesmorales: still
milesmorales: we must be noisy
hobiebrwn: he's slept through his neighbors bangin it out
hobiebrwn: a couple o pings is not gonna wake him that easy
milesmorales: damn
margobabes<3: how'd you know he's slept through that?
hobiebrwn: crashed at his place a couple of few, what of it
milesmorales: his neighbors sure seem like busy people
hobiebrwn: unfortunately for me they are
gwandaa: bigger question here is how do you know pav's sleeping /right now/
hobiebrwn: wild guess
milesmorales: aw sweeet
margobabes<3: how many times a day do you crash at his place
hobiebrwn: one
margobabes<3: this makes me want to have one big sleepover :((
SpiderNoir: first you have to get o'hara off your rockers
margobabes<3: the slang is back
gwandaa: true though, man acts like the five of us getting together is a canon event
milesmorales: which is bullshit, like canon events
margobabes<3: preachh
Spider Noir changed the group name to 'adoption center'
margobabes<3: lmao wHAT
Spider Noir: right i forgot to mention to you kiddos that i created this group chat to get updates on you all because honestly tracking all your business is a lot of work
Spider Noir: and i hate work
hobiebrwn: i dont believe in work either
gwandaa: adoption center
gwandaa: really
Spider Noir: im sharing joint custody with peter at this point, its actually fitting
milesmorales: he's subtly calling us fatherless
Spider Noir: no i just consider you my kids at this point
margobabes<3: brb gonna cry
☆☆☆
Margo did, in fact, shed a tear or two.
☆☆☆
gwandaa: this coming from the guy who claims to light matches and let them burn all the way to his fingertips to feel something
milesmorales: fatherhood can change a man
Spider Noir: it's all peni's fault really
penini: teehee
hobiebrwn: you light matches and let them burn down to your fingers to feel something
Spider Noir: that or i punch fascists, a couple of nazis, the likes of them
Spider Noir: it entirely depends
hobiebrwn:
hobiebrwn: adopt me now
milesmorales: hobie i thought you didn't believe in adoption
hobiebrwn: it doesn't matter, adopt me now
gwandaa: you said, and i quote, adoption is just a tool of the government to encourage people that it's okay to abandon and mistreat their children because someone will take them in anyways thus wasting the basis of the future that lies in the children that could've become great things if the government wasn't such an asshat
hobiebrwn: i don't believe in consistency remember
margobabes<3: boo
Spider Noir: how would that work, we're in different dimensions
penini: illegal adoption
milesmorales: isn't that just kidnapping
penini: no
penini: it worked with me, it could work with hobie
penini: he's gonna be a great older brother
hobiebrwn: aw what, you adopted her before me?
Spider Noir: illegally yes
hobiebrwn: how does that even work
milesmorales: kidnapping
penini: no miles, forgery of adoption papers
margobabes<3: ooooo, i like that one! adopt me next!
gwandaa: it works like that?
penini: apparently, yeah
hobiebrwn: no fckin way
hobiebrwn: im gonna get adopted against the government
hobiebrwn: this is proper dench
milesmorales: i'll just think of you as my honorary dad from another dimension
milesmorales: since i already have a dad and all
gwandaa: hey points for you
margobabes<3: way to rub it in everyones face miles
milesmorales: now you know i didnt mean it like that
penini: subtle flex
milesmorales: oh come on now @margobabes<3@gwandaa you can't talk you have fathers too
gwandaa: yeah but we dont subtly flex it now do we
margobabes<3: frfr
milesmorales: damn ok :/
margobabes<3: miguel's 13th reason lmao
hobiebrwn: blud's after you cus you're happy and he's not
milesmorales: damn i knew he never sit right with me
Spider Noir: i'll keep the old chap off you dont worry
Spider Noir: speak of the devil he's come to get me
Spider Noir: see you all some time
margobabes<3: he just left like that
milesmorales: id bust the hell out too if taco bell came for me
gwandaa: taco bell lmaoooo
hobiebrwn: no lies were told
margobabes<3: amen
margobabes<3: aight i gotta bail too my mom's up my ass again
margobabes<3: see ya babesssss <3<3<3<3
gwandaa: bye margo
milesmorales: byyyeee margo
hobiebrwn: see ya margie
hobiebrwn: aight who wants to come with me to the hq to cause top tier drama
gwandaa: and he claims he's not an instigator
milesmorales: what about pav
hobiebrwn: s not like hes knackered out on my arm i can move freely
hobiebrwn: i'll be sure to leave him a notice though
gwandaa: aight then count me innn
milesmorales: when i tell you that i so desperately want to come as well but my mom is holding me hostage
gwandaa: dww we'll give you daily updatesss
milesmorales: ya better
milesmorales: im counting on it
milesmorales: it gets boring when your grounded
hobiebrwn: *you're
milesmorales: I KNOW ITS A SPELLING CHOICE
hobiebrwn: just like your untied laces are a fashion choice?
milesmorales: *you're
gwandaa: he's using it in the right context miles
milesmorales: oh
miles deleted a message.
milesmorales: you didn't see that
hobiebrwn: right then
hobiebrwn: have a good one
gwandaa: stay tuned miles
milesmorales: sure sure
☆☆☆
10:47 P.M.
pavprabhakar: what is this?
☆☆☆
11:23 A.M., Monday
margobabes<3: shit going down in the hq cafeteria
milesmorales: what's up?
gwandaa: OH SHIT SHE DONE KNOCK HIS GUTS OUT
milesmorales: WHATS GOING ON TELL ME IM DYING OVER HERE
hobiebrwn: mate when i tell you you'll never believe who showed up to whip miguel's bollocks
milesmorales: WHO? DONT KEEP ME IN SUSPMNSE YOU KNOW I HATE SUPSENSE
gwandaa: *suspense
milesmorales: I KNOW OK
hobiebrwn: to be continued
milesmorales: NO
margobabes<3: OOOOO SHE TOOK A HARD ONE— OH SHE BACK UP AGAIN
margobabes<3: KICK HIS ASS GIRL
milemorales: WHAT IS GOING ON
pavprabhakar: miguel is experiencing a second canon event
pavprabhakar: peters wife came to give his ass a beating
milesmorales: THANK YOU
milesmorales: oh damn mrs. parker got guts
milesmorales: what's her beef with him?
margobabes<3: honestly? no idea
gwandaa: she just exited the portal after peter and started throwing empanadas at him
pavprabhakar: rip empanadas
margobabes<3: f in the chat to pay respects
hobiebrwn: f
pavprabhakar: f
gwandaa: f
milesmorales: f
penini: f
Spider Noir: f
margobabes<3: lmao hey old man
Spider Noir: i'll let that slide for now
Spider Noir: there are more pressing matters at hand
Spider Noir: like ms. mj shoving an empanada to-go box down oharas throat
milesmorales: what that taste like
margobabes<3: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
Spider Noir: we can interevaj thejsj latah
Spider Noir: my bad peter's gripping my arm like he's the one being whooped
Spider Noir: i meant to say we can interview him later
hobiebrwn: mayday is doing a great job at being the referee
hobiebrwn: its probably bad parenting but hey shes having fun watching her mom wipe the cafe floor with miguel's face
milesmorales: oh that is adorable
milesmorales: send me a vid of the fight please
milesmorales: yknow
milesmorales: as motivation to wake up every morning
pavprabhakar: lyla's recording every moment
pavprabhakar: shes also rooting for ms. parker
milesmorales: top 10 anime betrayals
penini: im recording this too in case miguel pulls the three m's on lyla so that she wont share it to anybody
milesmorales: the three m's?
penini: mansplain maladapt mistreat
pavprabhakar: that's what his m-shaped forhead stands for
milesmorales: M SHAPED FORHEAD LMAOO
hobiebrwn: i just choked on my empanada
hobiebrwn: nice going pavi
pavprabhakar: thank you :)
margobabes<3: @Spider Noir where you at
Spider Noir: table to your left
Spider Noir: far far far far left
Spider Noir: GUYS HELP WHAT IF IM NEXT
Spider Noir: MY WIFE IS NOG ONE TO DELA WITH
Spider Noir: MIGSUEL'S LUCKY SHE DIWNT CINFISCATE HUS OIFE YET
margobabes<3: watching you two wrestle for mr. noir's phone is funnier that watching ms. parker pull a mayweather on miguel
milesmorales: hi peter
Spider Noir: i have reclaimed ownership of my phone
Spider Noir: peter says hi
hobiebrwn: oh bollocks ms. parker has miguel in a chokehold
hobiebrown: his triangle face turning blue
gwandaa: she's strong
gwandaa: that must be where mayday gets her strength
hobiebrwn: strength is right
hobiebrwn: cheeky little bugger nearly ripped my wicks off one time when i was babysitting
margobabes<3: you willingly babysitting is somehow more shocking than that kick ms. parker gave miguel's balls
hobiebrwn: mayday can be very convincing
peterbestparker forced himself into the groupchat
peterbestparker: facts
peterbestparker: she nearly convinced me to invest in a spiderman themed restaurant again
margobabes<3: again?
peterbestparker: good thing i learn from my mistakes
Spider Noir: stop forcing your way in to places you have no business being in
peterbestparker: i cant believe you created an adoption center without me
peterbestparker: can you imagine the betrayal i feel from this
Spider Noir: you left your daughter on the floor to hide behind my back
peterbestparker: no i didnt she just crawled her way over to help her mom hEY DONT CHANGE THE TOPIC
Spider Noir: 😛
peterbestparker: oh my god hes using emojis
margobabes<3: literally my reaction
milesmorales: im pretty sure thats not how i was raised to turn out like i am today
peterbestparker: what do you mean, rio looks like she took you to the back of the church to make you fight her neighbor's daughter
milesmorales: BRUH
milesmorales: i dont know whether to feel offended or agree on that
Spider Noir: you can let your mom decide
milesmorales: bad idea, she's as terrifying as ms. parker
milesmorales: probably ten times more
peterbestparker: hey, my wifes plenty scary thank you very much
gwandaa: scary enough to leave your daughter on the floor?
pavprabhakar: that's bad parenting mr. parker
hobiebrwn: you're doing a whack job at being a dad mr. parker
margobabes<3: ms. parker oughtta come for your ass next just for that mr. parker
peterbestparker: now dont gang up on me like that
Spider Noir: everybody can calm down, ive got the little lass
Spider Noir: she moves around too much this one
margobabes<3: awww mayday!!! im coming over to your table dont move
Spider Noir: sorry i switched tables
margobabes<3: boy dont play with me i will pull a ms. parker in you
Spider Noir: kidding
pavprabhakar: speaking of ms. parker she just took the fight outside
pavprabhakar: she and miguel are wrestling down a flight of stairs
penini: im following them where everybody at
gwandaa: right behind ya
margobabe<3: giving mayday a ride, im such a cool sister
hobiebrwn: pav and i are in your robot
gwandaa: peni, are you okay? your robot just tripped and rolled right into ms. parker and miguel
gwandaa: oh nevermind
gwandaa: @hobiebrwn stop scaring people by "breaking and entering"
gwandaa: hows you manage to do that anyway thats a moving robot
hobiebrwn: tomfoolery
gwandaa: shut up
penini: im fine
penini: but NEVER do that again
penini: im gonna have to put safety protocols in here just for you
hobiebrwn: im flattered mate
pavprabhakar: HAHAHA ms. parker and miguel just kept on fighting even though peni's robot bumped into them
peterbestparker: shes got her priorities straight
peterbestparker: @margobabes<3 give me back mayday please
margobabes<3: no ♡
peterbestparker: thats my child margo
margobabes<3: she stopped being your child when you left her on the floor
pavprabhakar: DAAAAAMN
milesmorales: YOU ARE NEVER RECOVERING FROM THAT
pavprabhakar: I DONT THINK THEY MADE MEDICINE TO CURE A BURN LIKE THAT
gwandaa: MARGO BABY YOU DIDNT HAVE TO ROAST HIM LIKE THATTT
hobiebrwn: good lord im havin a giraffe @margobabes<3 you're a cheeky one
margobabes<3: thank you thank you
peterbestparker: okay you didnt have to come for me like that :(
Spider Noir: deserve
peterbestparker: shut up
pavprabhakar: oop they're boutta roll out the window im gonna go web them into the lounge
hobiebrwn: m comin with ya
pavprabhakar: sure sure
gwandaa: okay so miguel tried to fight back with his teeth
gwandaa: he's hissing and scratching like a cat
margobabes<3: he's resorted to his natural instincts
milesmorales: is there a live somewhere that i can watch this in real time
penini: on ittt
milesmorales: thankssss
milesmorales: hey @peterbestparker why's ms. parker beefing with miguel anyways
peterbestparker: would you believe me if i told you that i have no idea either
peterbestparker: in fact, i told her, 'hey hon, im off to work,' and she was like, 'id actually like to speak with your boss' and i was like, 'thats probably a bad idea. see you by 7,' but then she just jumped out the portal after me and started throwing empanadas at him
milesmorales: so ive been told
milesmorales: has she met miguel before?
peterbestparker: i have no idea. shes only ever heard of him whenever i share with her stories about work
milesmorales: what did you tell her that might've prompted her to start throwing hands with him like that
margobabes<3: MS. GURL LEGIT JUST SAID COME CATCH THIS HANDS IM CREASING
peterbestparker: i cant remember
peterbestparker: ive told her how much he acts and broods like a cat
gwandaa: THEYRE PULLING EACH OTHERS HAIR LMFAOOOO
peterbestparker: i also told her how annoying he is, always talking about the 'fate of the multiverse' and stuff
penini: MIGUEL JUST TRIED TO KICK HER IN THE NAZ WHAT IS THIS BEHAVIOR
penini: ALL THE SPIDERS ARE GOING WILD
peterbestparker: i've told her as well that his hologram suit does not do well for his backdoor
pavprabhakar: HE'S CLENCHING SO HARD AND FOR WHAT
pavprabhakar: EVERYBODY'S PHONES ARE OUT I CANNOTTT
peterbestparker: i guess i also told her about his canon events and his reaction in dealing with you
hobiebrwn: THE BLOKE DONE BIT HER ANKLE
hobiebrwn: HES GOING FERAL
milesmorales: well thats eventful
milesmorales: i cant see anything that might have provoked her to fight him though
peterbestparker: me too
peterbestparker: maybe it's that time of the year and she needed an outlet to punch all her emotions out
milesmorales: why would she chose miguel though
peterbestparker: true
Spider Noir: maybe your wife just likes to instigate
margobabes<3: ajskns w wjw smommmya ajanai sjanna spiaoder ska
Spider Noir: your daughter agrees
margobabes<3: ajia2 os due w aiwbwis ks siz skza ajajba sza auwibs bitcjhaba jw
peterbestparker: stop acting like you know her better than i do >:(
margobabes<3: sorry mayday took control of my phone
margobabes<3: mannn the fight is overrrr :(((
pavprabhakar: everybody's cheering for ms. parker
milesmorales: as far as ive seen in the live its a tie
milesmorales: both of them are equally exhausted
hobiebrwn: what are you stressin mate the winners obviously ms. parker
peterbestparker: good to know miguel might come for me because he cant take it out on her
gwandaa: you don't know that
penini: @peterbestparker ms. parker is looking for you
peterbestparker: well thats reassuring
margobabes<3: i already gave her mayday dw
Spider Noir: your lady is a fighter thats for sure
peterbestparker: thank you
peterbestparker: welp, wish me luck guys
pavprabhakar: good luck mr. parker!
gwandaa: all the spiders patting ms. parker on the back
gwandaa: everybody seems to have forgotten that miguel is on the ground
milesmorales: not everybody, i can see the lego one trying to help him out
pavprabhakar: jokes aside i know miguel is never going to recover from the fight
pavprabhakar: he'll probably never show his face for at least about a week
hobiebrwn: a week or more
margobabes<3: it gives us enough time for a roundabout sleepover!!!
milesmorales: you're still going on with that idea?
gwandaa: omgggg YES we should do that!
pavprabhakar: what's a roundabout sleepover
margobabes<3: my term for sleeping over at one of our houses for each night of the week
hobiebrwn: here's your friendly neighborhood reminder that im homeless
margobabes<3: we can break in and sleepover in the british palace
hobiebrwn: not bad kess
pavprabhakar: huh its actually not so bad an idea
gwandaa: @penini wanna come with?
penini: yesyesyessss!! i needed the break anyway!! :DDDD
pavprabhakar: what have you been working on?
penini: nuclear bomb
milesmorales: WHOA
gwandaa: damn ok
margobabes<3: no need to get controversial peni
hobiebrwn: nice going pens
pavprabhakar: hey dont scare me like that >:(
penini: jkjk im sorry
Spider Noir: if anybody wants to know ms. mj is giving peter a scolding
Spider Noir: and mayday is copying her mom
margobabes<3: aw such a lil cutie patootie
gwandaa: what about miguel
Spider Noir: he refuses to talk to anyone except lego spiderman
Spider Noir: he is now going to sulk in his room
hobiebrwn: he should that wanker
pavprabhakar: what is ms. parker yelling at peter for?
Spider Noir: for leaving mayday on the floor
margobabes<3: that scolding was rightfully earned
margobabes<3: so im gonna bail, im gonna start making plans about our sleepover
Spider Noir: you kids have fun
Spider Noir: im gonna go talk to ms. mj
pavprabhakar: hey hobie lets go back to my dimension i wanna revisit the british museum
hobiebrwn: lets do that
milesmorales: and im all alone again
gwandaa: miles im coming over
milesmorales: i retract my recent statement
penini: loggin' out folks! :D
☆☆☆
Mary Jane Parker fought Miguel O'hara all over the Spider Head Quarters for property of Peter B. Parker.