Curiosity Waterboarded The Cat
Sanji dumped the bodies of Atsushi and Hikaru onto the floor of the common room. Atsushi was still passed out, but Hikaru had stopped crying and stared blankly into the fireplace. Kauro put a shock blanket over his shoulders.
“And so it turns out that Light COULDN’T have been the one to take Chopper’s leg. These videotapes prove it.” Dazai announced, holding up an ipad for the group to see. On it was a tape of Light rocking back and forth in his cell, crying, pictures of Mia taped on every wall. The video was timestamped for the same time the crime occurred.
“Thank goodness L was smart enough to have CCTV in Light’s cell at all times!” Kaoru exclaimed. “If only he was here and not at Kenji’s farm then we wouldn't have had to waste time questioning him at all!”
Mori tended to the fireplace while Dazai and Sanji watched the bois from afar. Prank Stage!! had clearly revealed a lot about their fellow students, perhaps more than they ever expected. After all, it was just supposed to be a harmless prank! Something to lift the spirits after news of Chopper’s stolen leg broke out. Shougo just HAPPENED to be in the town and just HAPPENED to have the camera crew free. Nothing more, nothing less.
“One thing I don't get,” Sanji muttered quietly, “Is why Atsushi feels so deeply about Chopper. Last I remember, the pair of them were duelling for Zoro’s hand.”
Dazai rubbed his chin in consideration.
“Don’t you remember,” Sanji’s voice got lower, “How jealous Atsushi had been over his lack of funeral, and for how long? I just don’t know if his reaction right now makes sense, I for one don’t know if he’s being genuine or not.”
“No, I don't remember,” Dazai said. He wasn't sure why he couldn't remember, but he pushed the thought away. “But continue.” If what the man said was true, then Dazai couldn't fault the man’s logic. Atsushi had a track record for being passionate and jealous, and also being able to hold a grudge. Why would he be so keen to get Chopper’s leg back unless it were simply a ruse to take charge of where the investigation went to lead the students away from himself as a suspect? Chopper was at the bottom of Atsushi’s list of friends; he’d taken months to get over the fact that Chopper was let into the group chat and he wasn’t.
“Do you remember when Hannah’s funeral was televised?” Dazai stared at the curled-up Atsushi, still passed out from his make out session.
“He wouldn’t stop talking about it for weeks. He kept on saying how the girl had done nothing more remarkable than a revenge suicide, he was so jealous of someone he never even knew.”
The pair hadn’t noticed Mori standing beside him until Dazai saw him nod in his periphery.
“Mori! How long have you been standing there for?”
Mori held up three fingers.
“How much did you hear?” Sanji butted in. If the man had been there for three minutes, he probably heard the entirety of their conspiracy.
Mori nodded.
“And you agree?” Dazai queried. “We’re not just being paranoid?”
Mori’s expression said everything words couldn’t: he agreed, he stood by them, he was loyal, Atsushi was acting suspect, Atsushi had motive, and yes he wanted a BLT sandwich (hold the LT) from Inosuke’s food truck for lunch.
Sanji and Mori shared a nod (even Sanji couldn’t question the deliciousness of Inosuke’s home-grown bacon) before staring at the passed-out Atsushi, contemplating what they would have to do to get Chopper’s leg back. Being in the common room only increased their drive - not too far away were their bedrooms, and sleep was as close to death as Dazai ever got, the prospect of sleep was the one thing that drove Sanji to trying to find out this mystery.
-
Atsushi’s head pounded. He felt like his soul had been sucked out of him and then forced back in. He tried to flex his hands, only to realise that he couldn’t move them.
He opened his eyes blearily. Where was he?
“I think he’s awake,” Kaoru said. It hadn’t been too difficult to convince the twins that Atsushi needed to be questioned, Kaoru was quite upset by how much Atsushi had made Hikaru want to die. The twins were forthcoming with their aid, and also understood how convenient it was for Atsushi to suddenly care for Chopper, or for Atsushi to lose the jealousy he was known so well for.
“Guys, what’s going on?” Atsushi’s tone was panicked. His wrists and ankles had been duct taped to a chair, and Atsushi could hear another man screaming for help from somewhere nearby (little did he know that the man was Clay, abandoned by his interrogators).
“Don't bother trying to use your tiger abilities to get away, Dazai will always be in reach of you to suppress your powers,” Hikaru warned him sternly. Atsushi twisted round to see his mentor standing behind him, grim-faced.
“Plus that’s super strong tape, you couldn’t break through it if you TRIED,” Kaoru’s gaze was firey as he stared down at the tiger. It wasn’t specifically true, the tape was average - Atsushi was just weak.
“Tell us Atsushi, where were YOU when Chopper’s leg was stolen. Because you certainly weren't in Shanks’ class. You were absent, but clearly you aren’t ill because we all saw you turn up at the hospital with everyone else. Were you there to gloat about your crime?” Mori hissed into his ear.
“No!” Atsushi cried desperately. “I - I wasn’t! I didn’t! I was with - I was with Dazai-san, we were together, I promise!”
“How convenient,” Dazai said coldly, “Because I don't remember being with you, in fact I don't remember anything about you!”
Sanji flicked his cigarette to the ground, shaking his head. “Atsushi, i really don’t want to have to do anything that may scar you for lyfe…” he pulled a blanket off one of the torture chamber benches, wrapping it around his hands.
“N-no, Sanji - please, please,” Atsushi had never seen Sanji at his full power but had heard much about the boi, “I swear it’s the truth, I didn't do it! I didn’t take Chopper’s leg!”
“Also convenient,” Dazai sneered, “That you were so keen to seem as if you wanted to
FIND his leg, clearly you were just trying to lead our investigation astray!”
“No, no, Dazai-san, I would NEVER!”
“It makes sense,” Hikaru piped up, “Who would truly be dumb enough to fall for a fake bomb plot, particularly one with the low budget of Prank Stage!!”
“I - I did! I thought it was real! I promise! I didn’t do this!” Atsushi’s face was wet with tears, nostrils oozing as he choked on his breath.
“Okay, let's just say i believe you. You skipped class with Dazai. What were the two of you doing together?” Sanji asked, almost mockingly.
“We - we - we were just hanging out! I swear!”
Sanji looked to Dazai for conformation. He knew the Atsushi’s story had a slim chance of being true. Dazai shook his head.
“I would say I’m sorry,” Sanji said apathetically, “But truly I’m not. I can’t believe you’d stoop so low.”
Kaoru turned his face away, wincing, when Sanji dropped the blanket over Atsushi’s face and poured water onto it. The boi screamed and gasped, unable to breathe, it was a gut-wrenching noise. Mori’s stony exterior couldn’t handle it, his lips trembled as he heard his fellow classmate scream for mercy. Even hikaru’s hands trembled with empathy even though the boi had made hikaru intent to die.
Sanji dropped the wettened rag into Atsushi’s lap. The boi’s face was red, lips swollen from lack of oxygen, nose running, eyes bloodshot. His lashes were wet and lengthened by the water boarding and Atsushi trembled in his seat.
“Dazai-san,” he moaned, “Please Dazai-san, i don’t understand. I thought we had fixed our problems?” the boi wanted to cry and sob, but he could barely even breathe, didn’t have any energy. “Do you really hate me this much? You were the reason they brought me back to life. I am your kohai, we’re friends. I-I… I love you. You're the only family in my life.”
Dazai remained unmoved by Atsushi’s speech.
“Still not willing to talk?” Sanji asked. But his stubborn exterior too had been demolished. Seeing his fellow student, the boi he studied beside, being tortured - and being the one to administer the torture itself - was quite the feat. The betrayal Sanji felt at Atsushi having stolen a leg from an amputee was quite deep. As much as it pained him to hurt the boi, he couldn't believe he had the gall to steal someone else’s leg just because Chopper was also after Zoro.
Dazai could see how much Sanji didn’t want to waterboard Atsushi again and took pity on his soft-hearted friend. “Go through his phone. There may be some clues,” Dazai ordered Mori. Mori nodded, starting to search for the device.
“No!” Atsushi yelled. “Give me my phone, let me have a phonecall. I'm entitled to that at least!” As a judge Atsushi had some brief knowledge of the law, sometimes he’d make up laws if he didn’t though.
“You're wrong. You're not being held by the police. You my prisoner now, bitch. And you'll do what I say,” Hikaru cried. He was clearly going too far with this. The power had gone to his head.
A world without law was an unlawful world after all. Atsushi tried to think on his feet, he had to be smart. Unfortunately he was not gifted with any form of intelligence and was at a distinct disadvantage.
“Siri, call daddyxx69!” he shouted.
“Calling My-Lover-Daddy-X-X-69 flame emoji flame emoji lock and key emoji rainbow flag emoji,” Siri said in her smooth voice. The phone started to ring. It rang for a long time. The students scrambled to try and find where Atsushi kept his phone but they couldn’t figure it out! Just when Mori had his fingers crossed and everyone suspected no one would pick up, that familiar voice answered.
“Hello? Atsushi? What can I do for you today? If this is a booty call, I already have someone squatted over my di-”
“I'm being held prisoner! In the Oxbridge torture room! I need your skills asap!”
“The prestigious university, Oxbridge University?” Hisoka clarified.
“Yes! Yes!”
“Cool. I'll be there in like an hour or something okay? Actually maybe longer, it depends how long it takes me to put on my makeup. This kind of beauty takes time!”
“No! No no no!” Atsushi screamed. “Don’t you remember that-that favour you owe me! From when I-”
Hisoka spawned into the room, his make up smeared and shirt rumpled. He rubbed his swollen lips with the back of his hand. Around his shoulders was the iconic coat, made of atsushi’s white tiger fur, looking as grand as he did two years ago when he was prosecuting the Oxbridge teachers. Sanji rose a brow. Clearly this favour had to be something big.
“Allow me to talk to my client...in private,” Hisoka stated authoritatively. He rolled his wheel chair closer to Atsushi and reached for the duct tape on his wrists.
Sanji nodded at Dazai, who nodded at Mori, who nodded at Hikaru, who nodded at Kaoru. Even though they knew in their soles that Atsushui was guilty of stealing Choppy’s leg, they hoped it wasn’t true, that the boi they shared a dorm with didn’t steal someone else’s appendage. And they would do anything to be convinced that Atsushi didn’t need to be waterboarded anymore.