The Worst Escape
The Host Club stood in Hawkeye's music room, glitter falling behind them as a backdrop.
''I am not shocked that we, the most notorious Host Club in all of Oxbridge, have manage to make even the costume of a dementor look so sexy,'' Tamaki boasted. He spread his arms and tendrils of black cloth swept from his limbs.
…
Meanwhile, the Armed Detective Agency were contemplating tactics to get their senseis out of prison.
''I remember when I had no family, before I joined the Armed Detective Agency and met all of you,'' Atsushi's hand quivered when he covered his eyes with it, shadowing his tears from onlookers.
''I know, Atsushi,'' Kenji soothed, rubbing his back. ''We'll get Fukuzawa back for Ranpo.''
''I haven't seen him since last night,'' Tanizaki commented. ''He's so upset, he’s probably hiding away from us.'' The conversation was putting a damper on the mood.
Shanks' pup waddled into the classroom with a jingle. Bells were on her new, flashy collar, sequined with the phrase 'DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL'. Atsushi petted her fur.
''Here's my plan, guys,'' Kunikida said, and the conversation ebbed into tactics.
-
Night had fallen. The Armed Detective Agency were ready, watching from the perimeter. Tanizaki and Kenji were sitting off to the side, waiting in the get away car, but also ready to act as back up in case things went wrong.
"Remember, don’t move until they give the signal," Kunikida warned; Atsushi and Dazai nodded back in understanding.
At that, an explosion sounded from the south side of the prison. The walls shook, some collapsing down in a shower of dust and debris, fire rising up, smoke forming a tower and crawling into the sky. More explosions followed, deafening the air.
The Lemon Guy had started his attack; the Armed Detective Agency had formed a temporary alliance with the Port Mafia, though only Kajii and Aktugawa agreed, however Dazai, acting as if Tamaki was still in his body, was also able to rope in the criminal known as Tennessee Williams into helping, in exchange for when he had saved his family. Their powerful abilities were causing a distraction, destroying the surrounding walls and buildings, allowing the Armed Detective Agency to sneak in undetected from the north of the complex.
The distraction worked, as the dementors slowly drifted towards them, ready to defend their prison.
The Armed Detective Agency moved forwards, ready to breach the outer wall.
Atsushi transformed his arm into a tiger arm, and smashed a hole into the wall. Kunikida moved first, pulling a page from his Ideal and morphing it into a gun, Dazai followed with his revolver gripped firmly between his thumb and forefinger. They sprinted quickly through the courtyard, arriving at a barred entrance. Atsushi ripped it off with ease. They penetrated the corridor, running forward.
Inside, two dementors were waiting for them, one especially small, the other too tall.
Kunikida and Dazai pulled up, raising their guns. Dazai's eyes widened slightly in recognition, then tucked his gun back into his coat. "Hey guys-"
Dazai broke off as Kunikida opened fire, shots echoing down the hall, bullets piercing flesh, blood spraying in crimson arcs.
The smaller dementor cried out, "You just shot Mori! I can’t lose this one too!"
Kunikida gasped. "It was the Host Club all along?" He fell to his knees, only now noticing the shabby costumes, and that they both had feet poking out of the bottom, rather than gliding through the air like his Google search had told him a dementor would. Tears started to spill down his cheeks.
Honey crouched beside Mori, tears streaking through the black oil grease he'd smeared on his face. Mori's costume became darker under the wetness of his blood and he clutched Honey's hand. ''H-Honey,'' he gasped, ''Honey.''
''No!'' Honey cried. But there were too many bullet wounds, too many shots, and... not enough time.
Kunikida watched on. His knees too were getting saturated with blood. His hands shook; he dropped his Ideal into the puddle of blood and screamed even louder. ''No!'' Kunikida yelled, the sound echoing through the halls. ''Not my Ideal!'' Kunikida's sobs echoed in his lungs and he passed out.
At this point, Yosano spawned into the room. She held a chainsaw aloft in her hands, a grin spreading across her face.
Unbuttoning her shirt, she told them, "time for you to close your eyes, this won’t be pretty."
Honey squeezed his eyes shut, and heard the screams of Mori, his dearest companion and cousin. He never thought he would hear Mori make those sounds outside of the bedroom.
When the screams stopped, they all opened their eyes. Mori stood, his wounds gon, glitter falling from his fresh glowing skin.
Then, Atsushi ran in, sweat dripping down his face, his eyes wide with terror.
"And where have you been?" Dazai asked.
"Guys! There’s a tiger following us! I think he’s going to eat me!" Everyone ignored him.
Further down the corridor, Tamaki and the rest of the Host Club appeared, clad in their dementor disguise.
"Guys! I think they're on a different floor. We've opened all the jail cells on this level, and can't find them."
Behind him swarms of thugs, murderers, and robbers were wreaking havoc. Dementors swooped in trying to get it all under control. The Host Club and the Armed Detective Agency took advantage of the chaos to rush upstairs, looking for their professors.
It was on the top floor that they managed to find the cell. With a trembling hand, Hikaro reached forward and palmed the door knob, taking it between his thumb and forefinger, jerking it open aggressively.