One Piece Of Exposition
Sanji lit up his Benson & Hedges cigarette while staring out the rain spattered window, "Do you think they're done yet?"
"Who cares?" replied Zoro, his lack of concern apparent.
"It is the only way to get rid of that bitch – I mean girl." As much as he hated Kyoka, Sanji couldn't bring himself to insult a female under 80.
He thought back to that morning - Luffy, who they'd learnt was Shanks' seven year old nephew, was runing around the Oxbridge grounds, looking for something. He had picked up Zoro's swords, causing the moss-haired swordsman to snatch them back, growling at the kid to never touch his blades again.
Luffy scowled, "the Great Luffini will curse you and turn into green dogfood!" he said dramatically.
"You know the Great Luffini?" Sanji asked, who'd just been re-rejected by Nami for the hexillionth time, and was now smoking his sorro away on a nearby bench.
Zoro's momentary annoyance subsided, as he pondered this; the magician was world-famous, even Nekozawa's mighty powers paled in comparison. In fact the black magic user was probably the Great Luffini's most devoted fan. He had posters, action figures, T shirts and even a sock puppet he'd recently replaced Belzonoff with.
"Hey, brat, what would it take for you to get us in touch with him?" Questioned Sanji.
"Meat! No – wait- meat AND a new collar! Someone – definitely not me – lost Uncle Shanks' dog's collar, while I – that person- was playing fetch with it."
"You lost Luffy's collar?"
"Hey, I don't wear a collar!"
"I mean the dog, you idiot," snapped Sanji. He hadn't thought he'd ever meet anyone denser than Moss-head, yet there was this child.
"We'll find the collar, just get the Great Luffini here for this afternoon."
Zoro and Sanji couldn't be bothered to actually look for the collar, rather they'd opted to just buy a new one. Given its surprisingly high cost, they'd had to steal and sell Atsushi's fur.
("Would this be missed? - no why would it be? - it's just Atsushi," said Zoro. )
True to their deal, on receiving the collar, Luffy ran out of the room, and instead in came the Great Luffini. Sanji's eyes widened, as he took in the wizard's appearance. Luffy was wearing a black robe as well as a tall, pointy hat. This young, dim-witted child... was the Great Luffini? He glanced at Zoro and immediately realised the moron hadn't quite picked up on it yet.
"Er Great Luffini?, we need your assistance in -er- a resurrection," Sanji said, deciding to humour the kid- if the boi thought his disguise worked, might as well let him believe it, after all it was working on Zoro (not that that was saying much).
He explained the situation. Zoro, the imbecile, had pushed his beautiful Nami, causing a fight to unfold. Kunikida's Ideal had somehow gotten in the crossfire and ended up sliced and burnt. To make it up to Kunikida, Zoro and Sanji had promised to find a way to bring Atsushi back, so that they could all forever be free of Kyoka, who had killed 37 people – or was it 54 people – or 69 people, whatever the effing number was.
By the time he was done with the exposition, Luffy was stroking his nonexistent beard, and Zoro seemed to finally – a whole twenty minutes late – realise Luffini and Luffy were one and the same (well better late than never).
"Okay," said Luffy. "But first I need meat. And ketchup. Lots and lots of ketchup."