The Office of Muggle-worthy excuses

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The Office of Muggle-worthy excuses
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Summary
If the Ministry Of Magic, in the UK at least, outsourced their muggle related problems to a private firm what would it be like to work there? Any time the Ministry needs an excuse for something else that has happened threatening the lives of countless Magical users then the Firm steps in. Yes it has a creepy name, just the Firm because it is über powerful and in control of a lot. The Firm is staffed by characters from other fandoms, so step in have a read and see who you can recognise. I promise it’s going to be fun, I can promise you that!
Note
Hi guys, I started writing this to amuse myself, I couldn't get it out of my head once I read this prompt hope you guys enjoy reading it. As always you can follow me on Tumblr or on Twitter to see what I'm getting up to. Don't be afraid to talk to me!
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Obfuscating Memories

Taking a large sip of coffee and growling at anyone who attempted to separate her from her coffee. She felt satisfied in knowing that if it came to it, she could defend her coffee cup with extreme prejudice. Right now, she felt as if she needed the caffeine, her co-workers probably all needed coffee. CJ just knew if she asked around for anyone else who wanted coffee and got up to make coffee, someone would take her cup with the glorious hot bean water.

If you wanted to take her cup of coffee, you would have to pry it out of her cold, dead hands!

For now, though she looked over at Donna as the woman was hanging up on the phone. It would probably be yet more work. Don’t get CJ wrong, she loved her work, but now it seemed as if the work was never-ending. If CJ wanted to constantly be pressed against the grindstone, she would have gone into politics.

Too bad the Wizarding World was incredibly backwards and sexist, it would be incredibly difficult for her to gain a foothold within the Ministry, never mind the fact that nobody knew what her ancestry was.

For now, though, it seemed as if there were still more fires to put out.

“It seems as if the Dementors have escaped, and are bringing down the mood of the country.” Donna sighed as she hung up on the phone.

“Okay, well is there anything we can do to make sure that the Ministry can do anything?” Sam archly asked as he came bounding in.

“Sir, I haven’t spoken to anyone yet over at the Ministry, but I suspect that some of the employees over at the Ministry have had their hands tied. Not least by Fudge who refused for so long to increase the budget for hiring new Aurors. He might have increased the Budget now, but the department is now effectively playing catch-up and try to get back onto a war footing.” Josh explained, he still wasn’t sure what exactly would happen if the situation was allowed to play out.

“Right, that’s not good, Bones is still the leader of that department, isn’t she? Emily get on the phone to the woman and make sure that she is doing something. Seth ring through to Scrimgeour, the man, might seem to be a bit of a hardass, but right now he doesn’t seem to have any reason to lie about what he has seen and his actions. CJ ring through to Kingsley and see what he has to say. I’ll ring through to Umbridge and see if she has anything to say, ugh wish me luck, I hate dealing with that woman.” Toby instructed some of his staff.

“For now, though, Josh, issue a report that claims knowledge of what is happening, and link it through to some issue in the news that might be bringing people’s moods down,” Sam told Josh what to do

“What should I blame it on sir?” Josh questioned, wanting more than ever to get his job right.

“I don’t know, blame it on the football, blame it on global warming. Anything you need to do, we just need to keep this story locked down!” Sam started to throw out suggestions.

“On it Sir” Josh almost saluted as he reached for the phone, ready to issue a lot of thick and flowery language to confuse people.

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