Chapter 39
I, the American retail wearing british Kai Sue, coughed up blood.
Dabura kneeled down beside me.
"Noooooooooooooooo! Don't die!"
I gave him a rueful smile. "I'm sorry. It's something I had to do, to fufill my duty as the noble gothic Kai Sue."
Dabura sobbed. "I love you Zamasu."
"I love you two. I'll...I'll see you in hell." I mumbled, already finding my surroundings fading to black.
Lapis Seven'teen Smith suddenly popped into the room for no apparent reason. He frowned when he realized the room was oddly quiet, but at the sight of Zamasu's lifeless body, he screamed. His face became pale with horror. He screamed for the healers, Master Roshi, Vados, and every single gothic person he could think of.
Suddenly, a glow started to surround the body of Zamasu. Everyone stared in shock. His body started to lift ever so slowly and then, to everyone's shock, it started to incinerate.
When everyone realized what was happening, they rushed over to try to rescue the body, but it was too late, the Sue became nothing more then a pile of ashes.
A loud resounding of everyone bellowing "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...!" filled the room.
A flash of white light from the ashes then started to bounce around the room. Everyone cowered in fear and were temporarily blinded. When it was all over, things changed.
All the silly goth clothes dropped from everyone's bodies (AN/I will refuse to explain how the hell that happened.) and, in their place, clothes the characters would normally wear in canon appeared on their bodies.
When everyone got over the shock of becoming free of the gofick power, everybody cheered. Everyone started singing 'Ding dong the sue is dead...' Well, that is, until all the DB characters realized the true implications of becoming more canon like again.
All the characters who were supposed to be dead fell to the floor, their bodies cold and lifeless. Goku and Jiren started fighting. On the left side of the two, the battle of the Light Side and the Dark Side were reaching a climax.
And, because mortals are trash, Vegeta and Seventeen fled the scene and got married.
Goku stopped fighting for just a moment as a moment of stunning realisation came to him. “Wait… Zamasu is a kai, right? Isn’t he immortal and he can’t die-”
A punch to the face from Jiren stopped his logic in its tracks and sent him flying across the mosh pit.
Meanwhile…
Down in hell, Zamasu shed a single tear because of his current situation. A situation that would live on for all eternity. Or at least until the end of fanfiction time.
He lost it all, but he knew he had to remain strong. Nothing would ever break him down.
He looked down over his pale green body, and frowned. 'Where are my emo clothes?' He asked himself in confusion.
And then it occurred to him…
For his shirt, she was wearing a bright pink polo with a little seagull on the (right or left? I can't remember) side. Below that, he was wearing a denim miniskirt with the "destroyed" look on it. Paired underneath that skirt were leggings with a little moose at the bottom. And then Zamasu realized, on his shoulder, he was carrying a pretty bag with an eagle on it that said Live Your Life written all over the bag.
Zamasu supressed the urge to scream. Here he was decked out in clothes mortal-prep to the extreme wearing stuff from Abercrombie and Fitch, American Eagle, AND Hollister.
Panicked, Zamasu hastily tried to take off the Hollister polo, but underneath it, there was another Hollister polo underneath. Zamasu frowned, and looked under his shirt. All he saw was a bra underneath (dare I point out it's from the Aerie line available at American Eagle?). Zamasu tried to remove the shirt again. But to his frustration, there was yet again another polo to replace it.
"THIS IS UNLOGICAL AND DOES NOT MAKE ANY SENSE!" Zamasu bellowed out to the air. He failed to see the irony in his statement, how hypocritical his words were, seeing as he was practically calling the kettle black here. “AREN’T I A GOD? SHOULDN’T I BE FREE FROM THE CONSTRAINTS OF DEATH?”
Zamasu slit his writs and mumbled to himself, "Omigod."
Trunks wasn’t there because he deserves a break.