Sometimes You Just Really Need A Sense Of Humor (And It Shows)

snipers solve 99% of all problems

silentwalrus

(I can't remember what chapter, but like, after 48)

"Ed, whose sense of humor shows up at the worst of moments and manifests as things only an intel officer would find funny: *tosses hair* oh haven’t you heard? I’m the slut alchemist

Al, ouija board in hand: i’m fucking telling mom on you"

The Elric's Mom: "Fucking superb my funky little man! "

it's not a crush

justthingsfromsarah

The story progresses like this for the next two years because Harry's crush is strong enough to overpower Tom Riddle at age 16

Half a year into his resurrection he's walking down the Malfoy Manor halls and sees Harry casually walk into Draco's room. He gives up and moves to Majorca.

Fred Weasley and Merlin yes! Finally!

Angel_of_Anxiety_and_Tears

Chapter 2

Snape, who just wants One Fucking Child to admit they're a genius damn it: I will literally fucking FIGHT you into a potions mastery don't test me Frederick Gideon Weasley

Fred, currently dressed like a mad scientist except he didn't dress like that on purpose, and the lightening outside is also an accident, also he just wants to run a joke shop but Snape keeps giving him weirdly almost harder tests every time he goes to class: *not listening as he creates various amazing potions from scratch and invents others all because he was bored and also left alone for two (2) minutes*

snipers solve 99% of all problems

silentwalrus

Chapter 61

I imagine once a month since they were children Al would ambush his brother into a bath by force if necessary (it is often necessary) much the way one might a five year old toddler

Feed The Flame 'Cause We Can't Let Go

pansexualorgana (MaximumMarygold)

Chapter 6

Ed: "PLEASE please say it PLEASE make my day I will give you ONE THOUSAND points PLEASE!"

Draco, after two seconds of thinking about it: *actively calls Roy Mustang a bastard to his face*

Roy: "Please stop teaching everyone you've ever decided you like to call mean bastard to my face./j"

Ed, dying due to laughing so hard they're crumbled on the ground: "No, I'm sorry but it's easy and I'm lazy" tiktok sound

The Founder's Chronicles a.k.a Tobirama NO!

GivemeanID

Chapter 19

"Tobirama : * On the sixth day of a research binge, sleep deprived as fuck and over cafeinated * What if I do that ?

Tobirama : * Later, still sleep deprived as fuck, on the roof of his lab, watching the eldritch horror he somehow created trying to eat a flailling Hashirama. Madara is screaming in the background. The village is in utter chaos * Hum..."

Tobirama: *changes one (1) squiggly line*

The Thing: *somehow becomes a biblically accurate angel, which is worse actually*

One hell of a ride

WrathMEscribbleS (Wrathofscribbles)

Rhys: "YOLO, Kaidan. YOLO."

Kaidan: "Considering the 3 lives you've already burned through to get here, I'm pretty sure that doesn't count for you anymore."

Rhys/or honestly like, most Shepard's to be fair: "Yolt."

James Potter and the oh shit is that Voldemort

Ourliazo

Chapter 38

The Author: "guess who did it!"

The ENTIRE Harry Potter fandom including the snape fans: "Was is it Snape?"

The Author: "😧😶 damn 😒" 

N7 Day: Extranet and Coffee

projectseraphim

Kaidan: i’m proud to say i identify as moronsexual. i’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively

Beau: *exists*

Kaidan, already taking his clothes off: you're so fucking dumb

Or

Kaidan, who in my genuine definitely not biased-cause-he's-pretty-much-the-Cullen-of-Mass-Effect-for-me opinion could have anyone: I want that one

Beau Shepard: *googling the word slang twice because he forgot what it meant the first time*

Kaidan: he's fucking perfect

Fictober 2021 Drabbles

projectseraphim

Chapter 13

No one:

Joker: "Well that's me bored, guess it's time to fuck with somebody."

Kaidan: *has been staring at Shepard any time Shepard wasn't staring at him*

Joker, The Devil actually: *Grinch smiles*

Life as a Nukenin

JKblue

Chapter 113

Jiraiya: "If I don't look directly at them, the gay thoughts can't catch me."

Kakashi, evilly: "Sure."

Orochimaru, in general: "...Yeah"

Professor Tommy

Ourliazo

Sirius, holding a random knife: homicide is sometimes the answer

James, quickly taking it from him before he gets close enough: no it's not Sirius

Remus, turning the knife into a rubber duck and throwing it behind him hitting someone in the face: we're not having this conversation where people can hear you two

Peter, who got hit in the face: do i even exist to you