Prisoner of Azkaban
Hermonie was utterly confused by Harry’s actions a couple of weeks ago. It had been a couple weeks because hermonie got temporary amnesia because she got hit by a flying helicopter whilst not playing quidditch becuase shes a bookworm not a sport junkie. Anyhow, that was mad weird, she had thought.
She decided to follow harry to see what he was doing but to her dismay, he was just drawing him a draco together…well thats what she was assuming, it looked more like 2 newly discovered shapes trying to claw their way out from hell and into heaven for they could not bare the firey pits as they are devout chirstians. They wanted to apologise to God to whatever they may have done to upset him. For which God would reply “you are gay” and then banish the both of the to the 9th layer of hell where they shall suffer for all eternity (raiden shogun referecnce uwu) but it wont be too bad, for they will have each other….Okay hermonie was severely high on meds. She needs to go to sleep, she shall deal with this tmr.
It was the next day and hermonie was all better! She found harry at dummbledoors office. When he emerged he was like “Hey get ron we’re going shopping”
Hermonie stared blankly at him. “What?”
“Just come with me”
The triangles went on their merry way to this building place that was probably located at school. It was snowing and super slay until they ran into someone…um i wouldnt say unexpected because he goes to the school but like they didnt know he would be there yknow?...
ahem it was draco!
“UGh!! You have to be kidding, draco why are you here?” Hermonie asked. As she was looking at him, she could see that monstrosity of a drawing. She shivered.
“Im ‘angin’ out with mah bois” Draco stared at the smart ass. His eyes drifted over the person standing next to her, who was shuffling really weirdly.
“Draco can you please leave?? We need this area for something!!” ron pleaded
Harry cut in “no no its fine, d-draco you can #stay here..we’ll um go somewhere else”
Everyone looked at harry in shock
“Harry…we need to cure you of this illness.” Ronie put a hand on harry potters shoulder (draco was eyeing him like a hawk)
“What illness?”
“Simping”
Harry and draco were both blushing.
“ron..uGhHufoeqigjqad okay fine we’ll move, bye bye you snollygoster” Hermonie dragged ron and harry whilst flipping her hair back like the girlboss she is.
Draco stared in disbelief… “she…she called me a snollygoster!!” he was appalled “but harry…he said we could stay” his voice was soft, eyes glistening as he smiled to himself when he suddenly slapped himself in his gorgeosue face. “No…i musnt…im an emo edge lord, heck! Im the king of emo edge lords!!”
Ignoring whatever the fuck draco just did, Crabep man asked “Draco wot dos snollygoster mean”asked crape
Draco sighed “no fucking clue”
Him and his edgy friends all stared up at the cloudy sky.
“HOLY MACARONI WE;VE GONE BACK IN TIEME” shouted ron
“Shut up you pillock!!” ermonie shouted whispered
Ron gasped “hermeonie…you..you are so mean” ron curled up into a ball and sulked.
“Oh for crying out loud” hermonie was trying to get ron to stand up as harry started to sing Rad Bomance by Gady Lala.
“[Intro]
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
Caught in a rad bomance
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
Caught in a rad bomance
Ra-ra, ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma
Gaga, oh, la-la, want your rad bomance
Ra-ra-ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma
Gaga, oh, la-la, want your bad romance
[Verse 1]
I want your ugly, I want your disease
I want your everything as long as it's free
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love (Oh, ey)
I want your drama, the touch of your hand (Hey!)
I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand
I want your love
Love, love, love, I want your love
(Love, love, love, I want your love)”
That got ron to stop and look at him. Hermonie too, was utterly amazied but also scared for some reason.
“Sheeeeesh harry, who knew you could sing!” ron said excitedly, alsmot in a chad like way.
“Thanks” harry said cooley.
They wandered around, causing chaos, throwing snowballs at draco and his friends (harry drew a messaged in the snow, just for malfoy. It read “you are so slay, so edgy and so so emo <3” draco saw it, blushed before he turned around so quickly he winded himself lol imagine)
That was until, ron got lost…
“Book girl-
“Hermonie”
“Book i mean hermonie!!!! Rons gone :(“
“Oh…meh whatever” hermonie shrugged and kept walking
Harry continued alongside her too when…
“OH MY GAUR WHAT IS THAT??” Harry pointed to a white light that shone the opposite of them.
Harry saw his dad standing there, warding off one of them demodog things.
“Hermonei thats my dad…i swear it is…cross my heart…and i hope to dieeee”
“What?”
“Cross my heart and hope to die.. By 5 maroon” harry said
“I- no not that” Hermonine rolled her eyes. “ i mean what do you mean that's your dad?, he cant be alive otherwise your not like a proper main character” hermonie said
Harry looked down at his custom Nike air force 1s.
“...i know its him, this prenencse…i've felt it before” harry whis[ered.
Later, after like a bunch of shit (the bunch of shit included meeting a werewolf, uhm…and other stuff)
Harry found himself in the position he previously thought was his dad!! bonkers i know fr like woah 🤯
After harry did the thing (killing a demo dog from the hit show Ttranger Shings) he fell to his knees and starting singing what sounded like his own ballad. he magic uped a piano and everything (one that could be on the ground cuz harry couldn’t stand lolol)
Hermione simply left, she was done with all his bullshit.
Even later that night, Hermmonie stole the thing that sent them back in time and gave it back to dumbledor. The day that she had was crazy and goofy. The only good thing to come out of it was Harry bussin it down to Gady Lama’s hit song Rad Bomance. That was really a whole slay like fr.
Harry was on his bed. he was thinking about the whack ass day he just had. He got to unleash his musical talent, he spoke to draco without dying (well…define dying) and he finally found out how to properly utilise that thing Tom riddle (he found out what his actual name was) gave him. Gosh i wish i was there to see it happen but oh well. I was busy.
Anyways. Ever since harry took home the prisoner of azkaban, snape has been around a lot more often. Like damn. “There’s something fishy going on here” harry thinks to himself when he sees sna talking ANIMATEDLY to the prisoner, it was hella creepy but he digresse. He also found out that his father has connections to Warner Bros. How intriguing.
In the Malfoy household there was a scheming little dripped out goblin chatting about his scheme with his good ole pal Draco.
“Jesus christ thank..um well thank you…i was going to say thank god but that wouldnt make much sense since like jesus is god..ahem” Ron mumbles to himself.
He pulled himself out of the ground, absolutely exhausted. I mean, climbing through all 9 layers of hell is quite the workout.