Dragons
Got off lightly
Dragons.
Motherfucking dragons.
Of course it had to be dragons hadn‘t it?
He was at least Harry Potter, the boy who lived, surely the defeat of a dragon would be adequate for him? At the age of fourteen?
Yeah, no problem, what‘s next, Lord Voldemort himself?
Oh yeah, when you‘re at it already, why don‘t give Grindelwald a run for his money, you know, just for the adrenaline-kick, nothing too dangerous.
The nerve of this guy, Albus Dumbledore, the old goatfucker, Harry thought as he strode through the hallways back to Gryffindor tower.
Well, those were some news to deliver and he knew how both of his friends would react.
Ambivalently,
as always,
Ron would …
Wait, no Ron wouldn‘t,
because he was never going to get this juicy piece of information.
The little shit had used the first bit of potential dirt on him to desert him in an instant.
Ron hadn‘t believed him to be innocent in terms of entering the Tri-Wizard-tournament.
He knew Ron was stupid, but this, this was on another level. Why, and he was going to repeat himself just to be clear, motherfucking WHY in the flying fuck would he want to endanger his life, MULTIPLE TIMES, for what, money? No, he had money. Fame? No, He had fame as well. Prestige?
Yeah, had to be, but wait, who was it again that killed Lord fucking Voldemort twice and stabbed a Basilisk at twelve? Right, it was him.
So, back to the question, WHY?
Yes, Harry would be an excellent Journalist with this attitude, might even get a few sentences at once out of Erling Haaland.
Inner reality switched to outer reality as he was hit by a blonde force of nature.
Well, not that much physically but still, you don‘t mess with Daphne Greengrass.
That was something everyone knew by now, there definetely were enough who had to learn it the hard way.
“Oof“
“Potter watch where you‘re going!“
Was the first thing that came out of her mouth as her previously handheld books educated the floor.
Oh no, the hard way.
“Right, sorry.“ He mumbled as he picked her books up from the floor.
“You better be.“ She somewhat threatened.
Not the hard way?
Harry decided not to respond to that threat equally out of fear and out of realisation of something else.
“Wait a minute, it‘s after curfew, you aren‘t supposed to be here!“ He stage-whispered.
“Neither are you!“ she shot back
Shit
“Okay, truce.“
“Truce?“
“Yeah, we never saw each other“ Harry suggested.
There was hope. He could practically see the fast little wheels turning in her pretty head.
“Fine.“ She said, “Give me my books then, I‘m tired.“
Harry was just about to obey when it hit him, again.
“Where are you going then? The dungeons are in the other direction.“
Busted, go brave Harry!
“And how would you know where the Slytherin common room is located?“
Shit, this was like chess. He wasn‘t used to this level of communication, he had (HAD) Ron as a friend.
“Long story.“
“Long story?“
“Long story.“
An incredibly perfect eyebrow arched towards the heavens.
“A long story that would bring some juicy detentions wouldn‘t it?“ She smirked.
Man, she‘s evil.
“Fine, you win and nobody tells shit to no one.“ Harry sighed while offering her the books.
“Agreed.“
She took the books and then there was this akward silence.
Motherfucker gets you everytime, especially when with girls.
“Guess I‘ll just …“ he pointed in his direction with his thumb.
Daphne‘s head shot up straight and her back went rigid. Even more rigid than it was before.
“Yes“ she spoke as she strode past him in a speedwalk.
Huh.
She seemed like having been torn out of a trance.
Weird.
Anyway,
he thought he got off lightly here. He knew what ‘accidents’ would happen to some that acted like he did just now.
It’s the only time he ever got off lightly, he mused.
Fucking Dragons.
Harry decided to check the Marauder‘s map. The lack of doing that got him into that mess in the first place.
And not a moment to early.
The ugly dot named ‘Severus Snape‘ was approaching his current location quickly.
He jumped sideways into a hidden passageway and only seconds after, there were footsteps and the signature billowing cloak to be heard.
Loudest bat ever, he reckoned. At least for human ears.
While waiting for Snape to go on, he checked the Marauder‘s map once again.
‘Argus Filch‘ and his living pocket vagina were camping at the Slytherin common room entrance, he realised.
Trust him to always be at the wrong place.
Fucking idiot.
Wait,
oh shit,
Daphne.
The dot named after the blonde was steadily approaching her common room.
Things seemed to get more complicated by the minute and it was seriously fucking with Harry‘s head.
Fuck it, he couldn‘t risk being snitched or some shit because Daphne would get off the hook for it.
Fully aware of the potential consequences, he stepped out of the passageway and broke into a run to the dungeons.
Snape‘s been a dick lately. Of course, he always was, but still.
With this in mind he shoved him while running past him.
Bastard.
Violence shouldn‘t be so satisfying.
Before Snape could hit him with a curse he cut the next corner sharply.
He continued running as fast as he possibly could.
He knew out of experience that he could outrun Snape when there was cover to dodge curses.
Being in another hallway before a curse could connect was ideal.
In addition to that, Snape wouldn‘t go into the dungeons if he had the choice.
He liked busting others way more than students from his own house.
Biased grease collector.
Anyway, into the dungeons it is.
Quidditch really paid off, he thought while praising himself for his stamina.
Quidditch à la Oliver Wood at least.
Hallway after hallway was put behind him.
Nearly there.
Dammit she‘s a fast walker, Harry realised as he increased his pace once more.
There she was, not too far from Filch‘s camping spot.
He couldn‘t risk any noise really, Filch‘s seemingly elf-like ears were way too perceptive and his bloody cat even more.
He wandlessly opened a broom cupboard while running towards Daphne.
He approached her from behind, one hand covering her mouth and one slung around her stomach, and pulled her into the broom cupboard before closing and locking it wandlessly.
As his adrenaline-high slowly sunk, he registered his long run was a bit heavier on his lungs than he originally thought.
He slid down the wall while breathing heavily, unconsciously pulling Daphne with him.
Suddenly, he felt a searing pain in his fingers.
That was when it hit him.
Daphne Greengrass was sitting in his lap, Daphne Greengrass was the girl he just manhandled into a broom cupboard.
“I‘m so sorry“ He apolgised.
“Potter, why am I here?“ She asked in a confused(?) voice.
Daphne Greengrass was never confused.
Like never ever. She just chose not to be confused.
But now, she was.
And honestly, it was the best that could happen.
He hoped he could make his escape before realisation hit her as well and her blazing wrath would change course in his direction.
But now that he was here, he couldn‘t help acknowledging how well she fit in his lap.
She was soft and firm in all the right places.
She shifted sideways so that she was sitting in his lap half sideways with her back still attached to his left side.
She eyed him questiongly.
Right,
why was she here,
damn, why questions seemed to be new fashion.
“Filch“ he answered. “He‘s camping in front of the Slytherin common room entrance.“
“Filch? I… I- wait how would you know that?“
the understanding look transformed to suspicion.
“You couldn‘t possibly know that“ She concluded.
“Yes, I could.“ He countered mockingly. All those questions were clearly making him act irresponsibly.
“And how do you know it then?“
Ah, shit, hadn‘t thought that far.
“I-I just know it alright?“
“You just know it?“
“Yeah“
“…“
Oh, al-motherfucking-right.
“Okay listen, swear that you won‘t tell and I‘ll tell you.“
She smiled at him, their faces even as she sat in his lap.
“Agreed“, Dammit having conversations with her was like playing a professional poker tournament, “I, Daphne Greengrass, swear on my magic to never reveal the secret that I am now being told, so mote it be.“
Harry‘s eyes widened comically.
“Y-You-You just…“ He stuttered.
“swore a magical vow, yes.“ Daphne completed impatiently.
“So how did you know?“
“Hold up,“ He successfully tried fishing in his robes without molesting her, “Here you go“.