Chapter 3
Regulus
Regulus is sitting and watching the disgusting display of affection between his brother and James. He knew Sirius had changed but he didn't realize just how much. If Regulus is being honest he just wants this day to be over with. His parents sent him away, and he thought he'd be happy at first to be away from Walburga’s curses and his father's apathy to his pain. But he just feels resentment, like his attempts to impress them hadn't been worth the effort since they didn't care anyway. He knew they weren't upset for him but at the reflection on their family. Regulus knows that they were secretly ashamed of him.
And not the same way they were ashamed of Sirius this shame felt worse, they saw him as weak. They’d caught him throwing away meals again and losing weight. Regulus had tried to say it was a one off but it hadn't been convincing.
It was ironic in many ways that he only started to starve himself after they used to take away meals as punishment. The fear and hunger Regulus felt at 9 had haunted him. By the time he was 11, he’d learned it felt better if he told himself that he wanted to starve. Convincing himself that it wasn't his parents hating him but a way for him to control his life. He'd wanted to see his parents as caring even if they were strict it was for his good he told himself. Sirius had never tolerated it but Regulus had been different he had tried everything to make them love him. It was never going to be enough though.
That was his secret shame. That he’d turned a childhood punishment into a disease. Being sent here was supposed to motivate Regulus to reprioritize his life for the family image. His meals were now being supplemented with nutrition potions and there was no way around taking them without the staff being alerted. He had to hope no one would notice it during meal times.
Showing off at this school and establishing a reputation of power was all regulus wanted to do. He was supposed to be capable of dark things. He was going to ruin Sirius for his parent's honor, leaving no doubt about his rightful place as the black heir.
This defense class had to be a perfect display of his magical ability. The teacher had started to pair people off. Please don't be Sirius, Please don't be Sirius Regulus thought to himself.
“Mr. Black”
Both of the brothers turned to look at the professor.
“I forgot we had two of you now, why don’t you pair together so we can see the family training in practice.”
Regulus and his blood-traitor brother locked eyes and suddenly he wasn't sure who hated being associated with the other more.
“Sirius is no longer a recognized member of the black family professor, I am the only one who has kept up family training,” Regulus said blankly.
“Lucky me I get paired with the psychotic blood purist” Sirius was trying to put regulus down but there was a fear there. Maybe Sirius still held a misguided belief that hurting his little brother was wrong. Or maybe he was finally seeing regulus as a person, not just the little boy who used to look up to his big brother. And just maybe he was afraid that he was about to lose this duel. Knowing Sirius it was probably the former, and he was about to be shocked by how far Regulus had come in the years without him.
“Don't be scared Sirius, I'm not allowed to do any permanent damage just some light maiming.”
“Enough” their teacher called out “stand in the center if you're both going to bicker your classmates will watch your duel and give critiques on form and spell usage.”
Regulus and Sirius took their stances while their classmates gathered around. As Regulus looked at their faces he saw the anticipation, everyone knew Sirius was powerful but Regulus was an unknown.
With his wand up, Regulus started flinging spells at Sirius holding back nothing. With every counter Sirius had Regulus found an equally damaging spell to throw back.
It looked like the most deadly dance seen in years, all the students and professors were in awe. No one was sure if they should stop them.
Sirius was deadly with his accuracy but Regulus was every bit as dark with his spells. Some of the offensive spells were years ahead and very rare. If they had been on the same side they would have been a force against nature.
Sirius liked to play clean though and when Regulus lost his wand after an expeliarmus he was going to stop. No one expected Regulus to start doing wandless magic and lifting Sirius into the air like a toy.
“Do you see me now Sirius, am I what you expected” Regulus was talking too much he knew he was probably showing his cards.
He shouldn't care how Sirius saw him but a part of him, that he would never admit to just wanted his big brother to see his magic and be impressed.
He’d learned wandless magic after Walburga had crucioed him for an hour and he had barely been able to move for a week. The first wandless spell he did was aguamenti for water. From there he’d spent months training himself to never be caught powerless again.
With Sirius in the air and no way out of this, He was sure he'd give in and let Regulus win this once. But before he knew it he heard the words he least expected leave Sirius’s mouth.
“You're exactly what I expected, you're just like them, you should be honored” Sirius spat out looking at him with the most contempt he’d ever seen.
And suddenly Regulus let go of his magical hold and let Sirius fall to the floor. Trying to hold back the wave of nausea he felt at being compared to Walburga and Orian. Regulus held his head up and stared his brother dead in the face.
“As the rightful heir, it is an honor and a privilege to follow in their footsteps.” Regulus prayed to whatever god was listening that it sounded believable.
“Well, students that was quite an exceptional duel. Let's move on though we wouldn't want to lose focus on our lessons, everyone find new pairs and practice spells until the next class.”
Regulus could hardly focus the rest of the lesson and wanted to be alone with time to do ballet. Those moments of practice were the only ones he felt free during.
When the bell finally rang Regulus packed up so fast and darted out the door. He decided he'd done enough school for the day and decided to disappear for a while. He ended up finding an abandoned classroom.
He accioed his ballet gear from his door with a wave of his wand. Pulling his gear on made him feel like he could breathe again. As he stretched and meditated before practicing old routines he settled.
He never expected to be interrupted.
“Regulus, are u- are u dancing” James Potter burst out breaking Regulus’s focus mid-turn.
As Regulus slips from shock catching himself second before falling he turns to James in annoyance. “What's wrong with you potter don't you know better than to sneak up on people, GET OUT”
“You didn't answer my question, and no thanks I was actually enjoying the dancing if you want to keep going”
“Look I get that you making fun of me and think this is amusing so just run along and tell Sirius you caught me dancing like a fool and fuck off”
“I wasn't joking you were good before I interrupted, I-I was watching for about 5 minutes before you noticed honestly.” - “And I won't tell Sirius I saw you I just wanted to check on you after class you seemed quiet after the duel.”
Regulus stood still no one had ever noticed his quiet spells before, he was at a loss for what to say, he was never going to admit that Sirius’s words had actually upset him.
“I was focused on the class James, you should try it sometime.” Regulus had a tendency to go on the defense when he felt cornered. And James Potter was doing a spectacular job of noticing more than he should.
“I didn't mean to upset you, you could just say you don't want to talk about it you don't have to be a prick,” James responded
“Fine I don't want to talk about it,” Regulus said honestly, it felt weird not to force a facade.
“Okay I'll leave you alone but if you ever want someone to watch you dance find me because I meant it when I said you were really good.”
Fuck Regulus was blushing he knew he was he turned around hiding his face from James. “Get out Potter my patience is wearing thin.”
James laughed like sunshine “Fine I’m leaving see you around Regulus.”