Everyone is gay and no one has died (yet)
It's always been right in front of him and yet he never noticed. Sirius Black was gay, gay for his best friend.
He was panicking, what would he do?
Would his friend hate him, find him repulsive?
His breathing quickened and tears started to form in his eyes. Sirius liked around the library to make sure no one, especially Remus, was looking and quickly wiped away the tears before they could fall. Nobody noticed.
Sirius had become quiet, distant and closed of. James was very worried for him. He found Sirius sitting in a corner in their room, his knees to his chest hugging his knees and his head sunken.
"Hey mate" James said quietly
"Hey..." Sirius whined
"Are you okay?" James asked
"I'm fine, it's nothing"
"You've got to tell me, man. I can't read your mind" James demanded
"I said it's nothing" Sirius cried, tears falling from his eyes, "It's nothing"
"Actually I thing it quite something, you're crying" James pleaded, "I'm here, you know"
"You'll hate me, you'll leave me." Sirius sobbed
James came closer, "you know that's not true"
"No, I don't" Sirius protested
The two boys sat in silence for a few minutes. James was helping Sirius to calm down.
"Padfoot, you can tell me anything." James promised once again
"I- I can't say it James"
"You can but I could try to guess it?"
"Yeah, maybe"
"Ok let's see", James started, "you murdered Snivellus?"
Sirius giggled
"You..." James struggled, "You got a girl pregnant?"
"The exact opposite actually" Sirius whispered
silence
"Oh, you're gay?" James blurted
Sirius whinced
silence
"I'm right, aren't I?" James smiled
Sirius noded
" 'm scared, prongs" tears were welling in his eyes once again
" 's okay, I'm here" James reasurred
"Please don't tell anyone"
"I won't"
"Thanks"
This was almost a year ago, nothing changed between James and Sirius. They were still best mates and still acted like brothers. But something still felt off.
It had been the summer Sirius ran away,yes they still had school but he was so excited. He'd been planning for a long time. He'd smooth everything out during the summer holidays and then close to the beginning of the next school year, he'd run. But it was still early into the holidays and he was impatient.
The group had collectively decided to meet up at diagon alley. There they could get some food and Remus could buy more books.
Sirius had pressured Regulus to join him, ever since Sirius had stated to rebel against his parents they concentrated all their attention and need for discipline on Regulus. He was worried for his little brother.
Regulus was no weak little boy but he had his problems. Sirius had always been honest with him but the last few months Regulus felt like his brother was hiding something.
He knew Sirius was gay, he hadn't been told but he'd seen the signs. The was his brother would look at Remus Lupin, the way he got jealous when Remus brought up girls. He knew.
But that was also the reason noone was allowed to know that he was gay as well. His parents would murder him. Sirius had a chance at happiness, he didn't.
Sirius and Regulus arrived at diagon alley, each having taken a bit of money with them.
Lily and James arrived shortly after. James had finally gotten together with Lily. She was the only one apart from James, who knew he was gay.
She was very open about her sexuality, Lily was pansexual and polyamorous. She told James about this and he said he didn't mind as long as they worked out boundaries together.
Lily was openly gay, and anyone who wasn't a complete moron could tell. She was so wonderful, so pretty, so open, so sweet. James loved her. They were happy, they could be happy...