The forbidden curses
POV Sebastian
The duel was quite epic I’ll admit. Ominis was no joke now. I wondered how he had improved so much. We used to duel a lot back in Hogwarts. Even though Ominis was really good, I was usually the one to win. But then I left. I guess he had to continue without me. I wondered how he had got on all this time, I mainly focused on finding a way to save Anne, deal with my immense guilt, hating myself for killing my Uncle, losing my sister because she couldn’t look at me anymore, losing my best friend who did his best to help me not fall into the dark ways. And to be honnest, I couldn’t even look at myself either. I still believe that my only redemption possible would be to save Anne. That’s the only way she’ll forgive me. And if she forgave me, maybe I could forgive myself. Because I was still incapable.
Anne, my twin. How I missed her. I would give anything just to hug her one last time. I wish Ominis would tell me her whereabouts. I have been searching for her for a long time. Any place related to us, to her, that I could think of, I searched. But with no results.
I know Ominis won’t give me the information I want, no matter how many times I ask. He is stubborn in that way. When we were younger, I could always convince him, in the end, to do anything. Then I thought of the times I convinced him to enter the scriptorium, even though he had no desire to enter that chamber. Then I thought of the time I convinced him to let me go with the dark relic so I could save Anne. Now that I think of it, I convinced him to do many things he never wanted to. I made a promise to him that I didn’t keep thus using dark magic. I had been a terrible friend to him when he was just trying to protect me. He knew the cost of dark magic. But I didn’t listen. My only objective was Anne, no matter the concequences. I thought back then that fighting fire with fire was the only solution, finding a cure to dark magic trough dark magic. But he was right, there’s a line that shouldn’t be crossed. And I have crossed it by killing uncle Solomon, with an unforgivable spell, and not just any of 3, but the killing curse. I could feel this feeling coming back again, this feeling I was so familiar with now, self disgust, shame, helplessness. No, there was no redemption for me. Ever. I had gone too far.
I was pulled out of my thoughts by Ominis.
- « Hey, you’ll all right ? » he said.
- « I’m fine » I replied with a broken voice.
There was a silence.
- « Let’s go, we have class with Professor Radagor. ».
- « Yeah » I answered indifferent.
Professor Radagor teaches Defense against the dark arts, our most important subject.
I enjoyed her lessons, obviously because I loved duelling. But she was a caring teacher, she knew something dark had happened to me, when I first arrived. But she never asked me about it, nor juged me. I arrived a few months before the others, trying to catch up all the lessons I had missed over the past 3 years. I worked hard, extremely hard to be able to enter that school. And She really helped me.
- « Shall we sit together boys? » I heard Valerian ask Ominis and I.
- « … Yeah … of course » said Ominis bashfully.
I just smiled. I didn’t feel like talking right now.
- « Hello dear students. Please take your seats. Today wil be an interesing lesson as we are going deeper into the reality of what being an auror is about. »
I raised my eyebrows wondering what she was up to.
- « You need to be prepared for any kind of threats. You’re job will be to enforce the law, but the highest rank you could reach, is to become a dark wizard catcher, and in order to do so, you need to know as much as you can about dark magic, in order to prevent the use of it, which as you all know is illegal».
I felt like a fraud at that moment, as I had used dark magic before, and not just once. I was lucky Ominis and Anne hadn’t reported me to the ministry of magic for what I had done. And the guilt came rushing back. I could also see Ominis’ face sorrowful. I know this lesson would be difficult for him, to be honnest for the both of us. Not only because of what I had done, but because I was the only one here that knew how shamefull he felt about using the crutiato curse on muggles when he was younger, though he didn’t have a choice.
- « Can anyone name the 3 unforgivable curses ? And their purpose ? » asked the professor.
Everyone seemed to raise their hands, exept me and Ominis. And Valerian too it appeired.
- « Benjamin ? » chose the teacher.
- « There’s the Imperius curse, which anables to gain control of the person under it’s spell, there’s the crutiato curse which inflicts imberable pain to it’s victim, and there’s the killing curse, avada kedavra, which kills whoever is on the other end of the wand. » he said passivly.
- « Exellent. But that you all know. When were these 3 curses classified as unforgivable ? » asked the professor.
No one raised their hands. I guess history isn’t everybody’s strong suit.
- « They were first classified as unforgivable in 1717 professor » replied Ominis, with a still voice.
If anyone kwew anything about dark magic, that would be the Gaunts. Although there was no proof, everyone knew the Gants used dark magic. But they had strong connexions to the the ministry of magic, Ominis’ father working there, which means his family got away with everything. That’s why Ominis always wanted to become an auror, to change that.
- « And what would happen if you used a dark curse ? » she asked again.
- « A one way ticket to Askaban » said Becca giggling.
I remembered my uncle telling me about this one time he used dark magic on a dark wizard when he was an auror. Although he was not sentenced to life in Azkaban, he had to retire early. And on bad terms with the ministry of magic.
- « In deed, and with no trial » added Samuel.
- « Professor, what if we are confronted to one of these curses ? Is there really no way to protect ourselves from it ? » asked Edmund.
- « There is no countercurse. There’s no blocking it. When you face one of these curses, there’s no escape» said ominis with a serious a grave voice.
Everyone looked at Ominis with a tensed face.
- « I ‘m afraid M. Gaunt is right. That’s why it’s so dangerous to become an auror. You must consider the risks. And that’s why we only select the best to become an auror.
But, if you're agile enough, thus your physical training, and if you know enough useful spells such as confringo or stupefy, you should do well. But it’s not only about physical strength, it’s about being metally strong too» the professor explained.
- « Wait, you suggest using simple spells against dark wizards ? » asked Benjamin shocked.
- « Stronger spells could be dangerous if you don’t master them properly. This year you will learn the firestorm spell for instance, which casts a ring of fire around your wand, and then a huge blast to your ennemies. But if not used properly, you could injure your partners too, even kill them. » replied the professor.
- « Yes, but that’s why we’re here, to learn how to use them properly » said Becca, always stating the obvious.
- « Yes, but not all of you will master it properly, that will depend on your skills, talent, and your state of mind the moment you cast your spell. It’s like the patronus charm, to cast it, you need to think of the happiest of memory. Well some chamrs require other ways of thinking » she added.
- « Like the unforgivable curses, they won’t work unless you truely want to inflict pain or kill » I said frowning.
Everyone was now looking at me, surprised.
- « Really ? I thought you just had to cast the spell ! » said Cassandra
- « No, if you’re going to use the killing curse, you must want to kill at your very core ». I explained. I could hear my own voice, sorrowful.
There was a silence. Ominis was looking at me, or towards me I should say, with a sad face, his eyes felt even more empty, like an ocean of regret, and compassion at that moment.
- « You have to be truly evil to use these curses. » said Valerian resentfuly.
She seemed upset. No wonder if she was blinded by dark magic. I felt like a monster at that moment, and I was glad she didn’t know about what I had done. If she did, she would hate me, she would feel disgusted or worse. Which made me feel appalling once more.
- « Well, the ministry of magic gives us permission to show you the effects of these 3 curses. It’s important you understand and be prepared for it. » she beggan.
Suddenly, aurors apparated out of nowhere. 2 tall men. There was a third person, in chains. He looked awful, tired, dirty, weak. All the students were intreegued.
- « Sebastian, what’s going on ? » asked Ominis confused.
- « Two aurors just apparated, with a prisoner » I explained worried.
Valerian was also listening. She looked puzzled.
- « Oh no » he said.
He knew just as well as I did what was going to happen.
Everyone was whispering, wondering what was going on.
- « Pay attention dear students. As we are about to show you the 3 unforgivable curses. This man enchained is a dark wizard. He has tortured and killed 12 muggle children, wanted to, I quote, experience new dark spells of his creation and ended their lives with the killing curse »
Everyone was holiding their breath.
- « He was sent to Azkaban 30 years ago. His sentence was life emprisonement. But for those who wish to end their sentence more quickly, death is the only way. This man has agreed to a demonstration, in exchange for his early release. If you truely want to become a auror, then you will not look away. » she said very seriously.
- « Is she really going to kill him, in front of us ? » asked Valerian horrified.
- « No, not her, the aurors. And they will torture him first » said Ominis gently to her ear.
The entire class fell silent, everyone was apprehensive.
- « We’ll start with Imperio, the total control curse » she said calmly.
One of the aurors took out his wand, pointed it to the prisoner, waited a few seconds for the professor's approval, then cast the spell.
- « Kill that boy with this dagger » said the auror relaxed, pointing at Edmund.
They were screams, half of the class stood up while the prisonner grabbed the dagger from the auror’s hand roughly and ran towards Edmund so fast. Edmund stood up, took out his wand terrified while trying to take a few steps back. But he fell. He was now lying on the floor, and the prisonner was just inches away from him. Luckily, Edmund cast stupefix and the prisonner went flying through the classroom and quickly stood on his feet once more, about to charge again.
- « Stop » said the auror to the prisonner.
And he stopped moving, just standing at the opposide side of the classroom, the dagger still in his hand.
We were now all on our guard, wands out feeling alarmed.
Edmund stood up in shock.
- « Nice reflexes kid » said the other auror.
But that didn’t seem to ease Edmund.
- « Everyone sit down please » asked the professor.
No one was moving, probably because they couldn’t as they were all in shock. I could see some students shaking.
- « Now, what just happened ? » continued the professor.
- « Yes, what just happened ?!! » asked Valerian to Ominis and I.
- « I suspect Edmund just found out the rough way the use of he imperio curse » said Ominis so calm.
- « Is Edmund all right ? » she asked worried.
- « He was quick enough and managed to sent the prisonner flying » I reassured her.
She only gasped, feeling worried and relieved at the same time.
As no one could talk, Ominis spoke up.
- « The auror ordered the prisonner to kill Edmund, and because he’s under the influence of Impero, he had to do it, regardless of the concequences. » expalined Ominis with a serene voice.
Anyone could tell by now that he was accustomed to dark magic and death. And I don’t know if everyone was more shocked by what had just happened,or by Ominis remaining so calm. He didn’t even flinch when all the others stood up.
- « You could have killed me ! » said Edmund to the auror.
- « And that’s why you need to be swift. » replied the auror unbothered by Edmund’s reaction.
- « Like M.Gaunt said, he had no choice. So, what can be done now ? As an auror, the prisoner is under your responsability. » asked the professor.
- « We could end his misery, after all he deserves it ! » said Benjamin.
- « What if it were a child coming at you ? Would you kill him ? » reasoned Ominis irritated.
- « Well … » responded Benjamin, not knowing what to say.
- « Yes, most times, innocent people are the ones being used. And it’s up to you to protect them too. » stipulated Professor Radagor.
Everyone listened carefully, not having imagined what this curse could truely do.
- « Let’s move on to the next curse, Crucio, the pain curse. » she reminded.
I could see Ominis’ face tense.
The second auror took our his wand, waited again a few seconds for the professor’s approval, then cast the spell.
Suddenly, we could hear the prisonner’s screams. They were loud and painfull.
I could see students covering their ears, their faces full of sorrow and compassion. Some had a few tears in their eyes. Ominis had a heartbroken face as he had to listen to the prisonner’s cries, begging the auror to stop. It must have been hard for him, to listen to that again. I was sure he was thinking about the muggle boys he had to torture, or maybe even his own screams as his family cast the very same spell on their own son.
And Valerian’s eyes were filled with tears, but she wasn’t covering her ears, she was holding her head between her hands, looking down, then closing her eyes as if she were desperately trying hard to think of something else.
As for me, well I thought of the time I used Impero, on that goblin that was going to kill my sister, and then I ordered him to kill himself instead. I remember seeing fear in my sister’s eyes when she looked at me. And my uncle telling me to leave them alone, and not to come back. And at that memory, I looked down at the table, feeling heart-broken.
- « Enough» said the auror.
The prisonner couldn’t stand. They just left him on the floor.
- « As you can see, the pain inflicted is no small pain » she explained.
- « And now for the last spell, the killing curse which causes instantaneous death ».
At these words, I gripped tightly my trousers, with all the strenght I had, because I knew this curse was the hardest one to watch. I couldn’t help but look down.
Evreyone looked horrified.
- « This is part of your training, do NOT look away, or you will have failed this class » she said gently. Becca had her eyes wide open, fearing what would happen next.
Edmund and cassandra were holding hands tightly. Samuel and Benjamin just crossed their arms looking at the prisonner trying to look serene. Natsei had her eyes half closed, trying to sheild her sight.
And Valerian was now looking towards the desk, not far from the aurors, not quite sure where to look, she seemed to be dreading this moment. Ominis layed back on his chair arms crossed, waiting for it to be over with a sad look.
- « Stand. » said one of the aurors.
The prisoner stood up painfuly.
- « Avada Kedavra ! »
A green light shone across the room. The prisoner was still standing. His eyes were lifeless . He then dropped to the ground. The man’s body was lying there, in front of us all, looking at the ceiling eyes wide open, his face frozen forever in pain and his mouth slightly open. And then his face fell to the side, now looking at all of us.
You couldn’t hear a sound. Everyone seemed distressed by what had just happened.
And when I looked down, I realised I had held my trousers so tightly that my nails went straight trough the fabric of my trousers into the palm of my hands, causing them to bleed. My hands were now covered in my own blood, so were my trousers. I hadn’t even felt a thing as I was so tensed. I could barely move feeling so troubled.
The professor looked uneasy at her students’s reaction.
- « That will be enough for today, you won’t be having any other lessons for the rest of the day. I hope you will reflect on your choice of becoming an auror. And if you do, this is what you must be able to face. You must have a strong mind, you must be fearless and you mustn’t let emotions get in the way. If you come back to class tomorrow, that will mean you are ready. » she finished.
No one moved just yet. Benjamin was the first to leave after a while, without a word, followed by the others shortly after.
- « Are you coming Sebastian ? » asked Ominis painfuly.
- « Yeah » I said still feeling in shock. « Yeah » I said again, trying to convince myself that I was alright. I didn’t stand up right away though. I took me another minute before I could leave. When I stood up, my legs were still shaking, my mind was going wild. Is this how Anne felt when I killed Uncle Solomon? In shock ? Even more so for her, as her own brother killed our uncle. I remembered she could barely move holding him in her arms crying her heart out.
And I started weeping at that thought.
I couldn’t breathe, I needed to get out of there as fast as I could. So I ran out of class, leaving Ominis there without saying a word. I ran outside trying to catch my breath, sobbing. After a few minutes, I couldn’t stop thinking about my sister, how I needed her, how I wished I could talk to her. So I apparated by accident into our home at Felcroft.
When I looked up, I realised where I was, tears still running down my cheeks. I stood up, looking aound feeling melancholy. The place was dusty, no one had been there in quite a while, including myself. I had only returned once, hoping to find Ann there. But she never came back. And I couldn’t stay there, every object, every inch of this place only reminded me of them, Ann and Uncle Solomon, and my parents, all of them gone. That’s why I decided to leave, finding answers elsewhere.
I let myself fall onto what was once Ann’s bed. Her sent was gone. I sobbed heartbreakingly, my tears of sadness falling like a shower on the pillow. After having cried all the possible tears, I fell asleep.