Congratulations, it's a boy!

Chapter 12

"Stark, I'm telling you, this is a terrible idea."

"I think you misspelled terrific."

"No, I meant terrible and you damn well know it. You're acting rash!"

"I have every reason to!" Tony snapped. "What those bastards did to my son is making my fingers itch. They're lucky I don't know who they are or I'd fucking murder them, I swear to god."

"Which god? Me?" Loki quipped, making a quick decision to jump aside and barely avoid being hit. "You should tone it down though. How do you think Harrison will feel after hearing you raving about murdering people he probably still keeps in high regard? He just witnessed a murder."

Tony froze.

Therapists.

Harry needed multiple therapists.

"I know. That's why I must protect him from those vultures immediately."

Loki rolled his eyes.

"He's protected here. Your son is also universally known; you step one foot into a solicitors office demanding justice for Harry Potter, and you'll be swarmed. No, Stark. This needs subtlety. This needs planning." The god stopped, staring Stark down coldly. "The boy appointed me his magical guardian for a reason."

"You were simply the only person that was conveniently there."

"And I intend to honour my position," Loki continued on, ignoring Stark's jab. He knew it was true. "Which means I have more standing in the Magical World than you do, and I will not allow you to rush into things like a headless chicken, as you've done with everything else," the god hissed. "But please, go ahead. Have fun finding the magical district on your own."

"I know where it is."

"You have no magic. You have no chance of passing through."

Tony seethed. "What then? Huh? I just sit on my ass all day? Waiting for some magician to show up and try to take my son away?"

"No, you idiot,” Loki hissed. “In case you've forgotten, I have magic. The boy is powerful in his own right. No magical being shall take him away, and besides, I never said no to hiring solicitors, Stark - I said to have a plan first.”

“What’s your plan then, oh the cunning one?” 

Loki smirked. “Glad you 

asked.”

Harry felt like a whole new person once he slipped into his new clothes.

They were so comfortable and for once, fit him perfectly. Could definitely fit as a more formal muggle clothing as well, so, a win-win. And Harry won't have to go on this shopping spree of horror with Pepper that seemed to genuinely terrify Tony.

Tony, who he still had a hard time wrapping his head around.

Everything he saw in the laboratory yesterday felt like a fever dream. Tony was so excited to show him everything despite it all going over his head, and yet, he didn't feel judged for his lack of knowledge one bit. In fact, Tony seemed excited to explain everything to him in acute detail. Harry still felt lost, but was awed at the same time. Especially since Tony insisted the suit could fly.

How? Harry still had no idea and wasn't sure if they weren't trying to pull one over him, but he was excited nonetheless. Especially when Tony promised to take him out for a joyride sometime.

Who was Harry to say no? He loved flying.

But what he really needed was to go back into the magical alley again. He needed to get that letter to Sirius, or his godfather might do something rash.

He had to tell Tony though.

It was weird having someone who cared where he was going or if he was safe.

“I'm leaving!” Harry shouted, then froze when he saw Tony and Loki hunched over, clearly scheming something. He didn't believe that look of innocence on Loki's face for a minute. The Weasley twins wore the exact same expression before doing something monumentally stupid. “What are you doing?”

“Oh, favorite son of mine! We're just- well, it's adult stuff. Boring, really.”

“Uh-uh.” Harry crossed his arms, eyes narrowed. He was certain it involved him somehow. Why else would these two be together when just yesterday Tony could barely stop himself from strangling the god?

“Wait, leaving? Where are you going?” Tony asked suddenly, as Harry’s words finally processing in his mind.

“You told me to let you know if I'm going somewhere. Well, I am. Not kidnapped, so, no need to go looking for me.”

“Going where? And what are you wearing?”

Harry frowned, looking down at himself. “Uh, wizarding clothes? I am going to the magical district, I'm not going in looking like a muggle. Someone might notice I'm wearing glamour. I got enough suspicious looks last time, thanks.”

Tony didn't look happy. “You are not going alone.”

“Why?”

“It's dangerous!”

Harry rolled his eyes. “I can take care of myself, thanks.”

Harry turned around to leave, more miffed than he could possibly fantom. He couldn't see what the big deal was. 

“Hey! Come back h- Jarvis, lock down the elevator.”

“Right away, Sir.”

Harry jumped back when the elevator door slammed in front of his face. Furious, he turned to face his father.

“What, going to keep me locked up?” he snarled, his magic lashing out and making the lights flicker.

“No, but I'm not letting you go out by yourself. New York is a dangerous place.”

"Yesterday you told me to inform you if I have plans. There wasn't one mention of needing a chaperone." The teenager looked ready to fight and Tony wasn't prepared for this. Monsters? Any time. Teenagers? Snarky hormonal teenagers? Jesus help him. "Besides," the boy sniffed, "I know how to protect myself and the whole bloody world is a dangerous place, thus, your argument is invalid."

Loki started snickering.

"It was like listening to an essay," he couldn't help but say. Did all British people sound so posh? "Kid, I fucking meant it when I told you about contacting lawyers. Me and this idiot over there will be going with you, hire people, and then we all will get what we want, yeah?"

The boy was still pouting.

"Fine," he said eventually, still bestowing a look of utter contempt upon them, lowly mortals. "Doesn't mean I'll be happy about it."

"What teenager is, champ?" Tony went over and ruffled Harry’s hair, earning himself another scowl. Aw, his son was adorable. "Come on, I'll drive. You can pick the music.”

“I don’t know any muggle music.”

Tony gasped. “What? Not even AC/DC?”

“Was that a spell or something?”

“Oh, boy. I have so much to teach you!”

“That doesn’t sound like music at all.”

“Shut your trap, Reindeer Games, or you’re walking.”

“What’s reindeer games?” Harry asked, wondering just who this Jarvis was that Tony kept ordering around. And really, did he have to blast the music so loud in the elevator?

Hogwarts should invest into elevators. At least a few. Or would escalators work better in the castle? It was exhausting running up and down from towers to dungeons. And if they had to have PE classes that ‘the Captain’ was so offended about not existing, he’d probably be dead already, along with many others.

“Oh boy. We seriously need to educate you in pop terms. How else are you going to insult others without them knowing about it?” Tony grinned at his son.

“Don’t you dare fill his mind with useless drivel when there are more important things the young sorcerer such as Harrison could be learning,” Loki hissed. “His priority should be learning as much magic as he can in case other’s decide to attack him.”

“Bullshit. Harry is a teenager and needs to do teenage things, not learn how to fight! Besides, now that he’s here, I will protect him. As well as other avengers will. He has no need to fight.”

Loki’s derisive snort was an answer enough.

“He still must know. Don’t be absurd, Stark-”

“Uh, hello?” Harry waved his hands. “He is still here and he can hear you. So, yes, I will continue learning magic, and… I don't know what kind of teenage things you want me to do, but we can… try those too?”

Tony grinned, even though he wasn’t pleased to hear Harry still wanted to put himself in danger, but baby steps. He’ll negotiate with the boy later.

Perhaps one of his bikes could be his first bribe?

“How did you like the music then?”

Harry shrugged. “It’s not bad, it’s just… different. Pretty sure just the kind of thing Sirius would listen to.”

"Sirius?" Loki asked.

"My godfather. He's… he was wrongfully convinced and escaped prison. The man he was convicted for killing was actually the one who killed Cedric and used me as an ingredient the other day. I told the Minister last year about it all, but he called me delusional and confunded. Wouldn't listen to reason at all."

"Did you have any proof?" Loki inquired.

"My friends and I saw him - Pettigrew. My Defence teacher did, but his testimony was null and void since he's a werewolf. Snape - that's my Potion’s professor who hates my guts - was there as well, but I uh… might've knocked him out before he saw Pettigrew. Pretty sure he was the one to suggest to the Minister that I was a liar and not to be believed. They could've taken our memories or used veritaserum - which is a potion that forces you to tell the truth - but we were brushed off. In fact, Sirius was never even given a trial or a chance to tell his truth."

"That place is more corrupt than I thought," Tony muttered, mind going a thousand miles a minute. "If this Sirius is truly innocent-"

"He is!"

"-then it would be beneficial for us to have him on our side, eh? He must know how your world works. And the government here will have to listen to you. You'll have us and lawyers, and every single person in this building to stand with you, Harry. Let's not get any of the Brits involved yet since they seem to have their heads so far up their asses that they can't see the truth for what it is."

Harry was so startled he laughed.

Tony had a colourful language and no filter. The Weasley twins would love him.

Buggers would downright worship Loki, too.

"See? That's why I was going to send him a letter," Harry waved the paper in front of them, "but here you are, hindering me."

Both adults stared at him with wide eyes, and Harry simply rolled his.

"I may be a teenager but I'm not a bloody idiot. However, I must be subtle and careful in case Dumbledore intercepts this. Believe it or not, that man has hooks in everything - and I am not going back there." He'd rather go back to Voldemort than the Dursleys and that was saying something. Quick death or months of wishing he was dead? It was a no brainer.

"Harry, I told you - you are not going anywhere," Tony came to him, eyes so sincere that Harry wanted to curl up and cry. "You are a citizen of this country and even more importantly- my son. You saw my suits - you're yet to see what they can do. And I have other tech. Any of those people show up here and they'll be leaving in pieces."

"I get that, Tony, I really do, but your house isn't protected against magic," Harry smiled wryly. "I portkeyed in just fine. There's also apparition which is just like teleportation: you wouldn't have any time to react and I could be snatched away."

Tony glared at Loki, as if that was his fault.

"Well, oh mighty god? Any suggestions against that?"

"Wards," Harry said immediately. "Don't look at me, I wouldn't have any idea where to start on a place that big and- well, I'm not sure how it would interfere with electricity that seems to be running everything here. Perhaps goblins could offer a solution - for a price, of course."

"Money isn't an issue," Tony rolled his eyes.

"You being a non-magical might-" Harry paused, then shook his head. "Nevermind, who am I kidding. If the deal includes gold they don't give one single shit. They love to negotiate, though."

"Sounds like a deal - I like it too." 

"Well, seems like you have everything sorted then," Loki clapped his hands, grinning. "Perhaps we can now move on and actually get the ball rolling? Some of us have places to be, you know."

"Should've thought of that before you became my magical guardian." Harry’s grin wasn't friendly. "My Godfather is a Black, you know, and they're all… well, it's called Black Madness. Something that's been ailing the family for generations, making some more unhinged than others… but I'm sure you can deal with it just fine, Loki, my darling magical guardian," Harry petted the god's hand like one would an upset toddler. "After all, you've just nicked his title. I'm sure he'll react rationally to this change. Those twelve years in prison haven't fed that Black Madness at all."

With a smile of an angel, Harry walked away from Loki as if he hadn't just proclaimed that a deranged escaped convict will be after his head.

"Your son is an evil incarnate, Stark," Loki hissed, despite something very much like pride welling up in his chest. That boy will go far: he could feel it. "If I end up cursed by some psychotic godfather, I might just break the truce and obliterate Midgard on principle alone."

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, dear." Tony slapped his shoulder and grinned. "You love our peasant Midgard foods too much to do that." Which was true. Jarvis dutifully reported on all of the things the mighty Asgardian Prince brought back into the tower, which included tons of sweets, for some reason. Apparently Asgard didn't have any chocolate, which was a blasphemy if Tony's ever heard one.

"Well? Let's get going, then. The sooner we finish this, the better."

Goblins knew exactly who Tony Stark was and were delighted to be doing business with him, even if he was a lowly muggle.

Gold will get you anywhere with goblins.

They'd even hire the most bloodthirsty lawyers out there for you, for a nice fee, of course.

Harry was in awe.

Is this why Malfoy always boasted about his father? Because right now, he could see the appeal. He'd do it too.

He could already see himself at Hogwarts next school year. "Wait till Tony hears about this. Who's Tony? Oh, my father."

Yep, that would go over well.

He had no idea how people looked at blood adoptions in Britain. Were they even legal? As far as he knew, any magic that required blood was illegal and considered dark.

Funny how Dumbledore mentioned blood wards. Bloody hypocrite.

With the kind of money Tony was splashing around, they didn't even have to wait. A goblin escorted the three of them to a private room where a lawyer would see them shortly.

So, yes, Harry was in awe.

"I thought you were pulling my leg when you said goblins, kid. Not very pleasant, are they?" Tony said, looking around the room in wonder.

"They like you. You should see how they treat someone they don't like. They also would legitimately cut off the hands of those who try to steal from them." At this, Tony's eyes snapped to Harry’s in pure shock. The boy shrugged. "No one is stupid enough to actually do that. Not recently, at least."

"Sounds about right," Loki smirked, biting into an apple he… conjured?

How?

Before Harry could ask, the door opened and two people walked in - a middle aged man and a woman. Both of whom have frozen upon seeing Harry.

Tony immediately took over with confidence Harry is yet to grow into, drawing their attention onto himself.

"Good afternoon to you both," he walked up to them, shaking their hands, looking every inch the businessman he actually was. "I'm sure you both have questions, but how about some introductions first?"

"Lauren Moray and Charles Wellington," the witch introduced herself and her coworker. “Pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

"Tony Stark," Harry’s father grinned. "And that's Loki, Prince of Asgard if he's to be believed, and as you already must know - Harry Potter. Likewise, a pleasure."

"And… may we inquire what are you two doing with Mr Potter here? He is… has been missing for days now." Charles was clearly more than a little startled and was having a hard time hiding it.

"And that's why you are here, madam and gentleman," Tony smiled charmingly at them. "Let's all sit down, shall we? This will not be a light conversation."

Harry could almost feel intrigue and weariness radiating from them. He hoped they weren't about to report him.

Madam Moray pulled out a quill and a parchment, informing everyone that it will write down everything they speak about.

“It won’t be like Quick Quill Quotes, would it?” Harry asked nervously, glancing at the quill. “Because those things should be banned. They write stuff like ‘eyes glistening with ghosts of one’s past’ and other rot.”

Madam Moray chuckled. “Oh no, Mr Potter. This is a court approved quill used for official meetings such as this. It writes down everything precisely as told.”

“Quills? Why not pens? Seems a bit outdated.” Tony looked at the quill with both, interest and skepticism. He would’ve asked Jarvis to record everything that’s being said, but the moment he stepped into the magical district, it stopped working completely, much to his annoyance.

“The Magical World is moving forward, however, these quills are still the most reliable of them all, I’m afraid.”

Tony hummed, and Harry got the impression he truly wasn’t impressed. He may have stared at the Magical World in wonder and asked Harry to pinch him, and yet, found it lacking.

"I'm afraid my story isn't something that's easy to believe," Harry spoke up, drawing everyone's attention. "I'd hate to be called a liar once more. Perhaps an oath of truth would suffice?"

That seemed to shock the lawyers, but Harry proceeded before anyone could object: "I, Harry James Potter, heir to the Most Noble House of Potter, heir to the Most Ancient and Noble House of Black, do hereby swear to say the truth for the duration of this conversation. So I say it, so mote it be."

There was a bright flash of light as his oath was accepted.

Harry grinned at the awed faces staring back at him. It was much easier this way. It was a gamble, of course, but it will be well worth it in the end.

"You… didn't have to do that," Madam Moray whispered. "You hired us - we are obviously on your side either way."

"It's one thing to be on my side because you're legally obliged to and another for you to actually believe my words." Harry shrugged. "I've been called a liar by the entirety of Magical Britain this year when I told the truth; I don't fancy a repeat."

"So you… didn't put your name in to compete?" Mr Wellington couldn't control his curiosity.

Harry shook his head. "No. I didn't ask anyone either. Quite frankly, I tried to get out of competing at all, but eventually, I was forced to do so anyway. I've found out way too late that my magical guardian could've pulled me out of the Tournament, but didn't. Quite frankly, I've only found out that Dumbledore is my magical guardian weeks ago. That manipulative bastard not only forced me to compete, but lied to me about everything."

"Albus Dumbledore is your magical guardian?" Madam Moray's voice was full of shock. "But how?"

"He appointed himself after sealing my parents' wills," Harry explained. "The whole situation is suspicious. But no, he isn't- not anymore. Goblins weren't happy to find out he was neglecting his duties."

"Then who is?"

"That would be me," Loki grinned like a madman. "Magic herself accepted me as a suitable option."

Which meant no government could rebuke its claim.

"Who were you living with then, Mr Potter?" Wellington asked finally, clearly having a hard time snapping out of his shock; not every day a literal god proclaims himself a guardian of one teenage wizard.

"My mother's sister and her family. They're muggles."

Both of them looked horrified. "The entirety of our world was under the belief you were raised with a magical family, Mr Potter," Madam Moray said.

That explained why people were treating him like an idiot when Harry didn't know something obvious. Merlin gracious, it explained so much.

"No. I only learned I was a wizard when I turned 11. Even then my relatives tried to hide it from me; tried to keep me from reading my Hogwarts letter until Hagrid eventually found us and broke in, telling me everything. It was quite a shock to realize that all of those freaky accidents were accidental magic and not some…" Harry trailed off, shaking his head. "Nevermind now. I'm not going back there ever again."

Both of the lawyers shared a concerned look.

"Were you ever punished for accidental magic, Mr Potter?" Madam Moray asked gently, as if afraid to spook him.

"What? No- ahh!" Harry grabbed his chest when pain struck him, gasping for air. Tony was instantly by his side, glaring at the lawyers. "What the-"

"You swore an oath," Mr Wellington explained, now visibly concerned. "Lying will result in pain such as this and eventually a loss of magic for a time."

Harry glared at the man as if it was his fault. Bloody hell, that hurt.

"Those muggles, as you call them, punished you for something you couldn't control?" Madam Moray looked horrified, even a little pale. "This is important, Mr Potter: were you mistreated by your guardians?"

"No- ouch!" Harry shrunk into himself, tears welling in his eyes as he glared at the witch. "Piss off with these stupid questions or this conversation is over."

Tony looked at the woman, mouthing 'later', but still stayed by Harry’s side until his breathing evened out.

"Are you okay now?"

"Fi-" Harry clamped his mouth shut and glared. Fucking oath. Why did he think it was a smart move?

"Harrison here will no longer be living with those beasts," Loki's baritone rang through the chamber, drawing everyone's attention away from the boy. "Stark here already has the boy's custody. Wouldn't you know: he's Harrison's third parent!"

"Excuse me?!" Wellington couldn't help but shout out.

"Some pesky blood adoption ritual I'm sure you're familiar with, and Harrison here ends up having three biological parents. Which I'm sure the Potters knew and must've said so in their will, which was oh, so conveniently, sealed by a man who kept forcing Harrison to go back to those disgusting mortals every year. I'm sure you can see that that man has an ulterior motive."

"Which is why I will not allow my son anywhere near that fucker," Tony said, rolling his eyes at the two. He snapped his fingers. "Are you keeping up? I'm sure it's a shock, but let's move on; I have places to be. So. The world thinks Harry is missing. This is what happened. Harry?" he nudged his son to go on.

"I was kidnapped," the boy spoke up, hoping that his oath of telling the truth won't act up. After all, he never swore to tell the full truth and he was planning on hiding quite a bit. It seems his self preservation was finally kicking in. "Cedric Diggory and I touched the cup at the same time-"

"Who reached it first?" Wellington interrupted.

"I did," Harry said easily, smug that the wizard looked taken aback. "I told Cedric to touch it together since it would guarantee Hogwarts victory either way. Nevermind that. The portkey's coordinates have been altered. It took us to a graveyard and no - I haven’t been there before and can’t tell you where it is. The second we landed a killing curse hit Cedric - I didn't even have time to react. I was then dragged up and tied up to a tombstone by a man named Peter Pettigrew- and yes, that bastard is still alive and kicking, which I've told the Minister last year but he didn't believe me either. He's an animagus and can transform into a rat." He ignored the incredulous looks from everyone and continued. "Pettigrew faked his death and framed Sirius Black - I could offer my memories. Something I offered last year but was conveniently ignored."

"Truly? You saw Pettigrew?"

Harry pulled his sleeve up and showed them the still inflamed and angry scar. "That piece of shit left me with this."

"Cursed knife?" Mr Wellington asked, horrified.

Harry shrugged. "I don't know. I was quite out of it. Cruciatus hurts like a bitch and that fucking rat hit my head."

Horrified gasps rang through the room.

"That's not to mention all of those injuries from the maze," Tony seethed. "He had a giant gash on his leg that I was later told was from an acromantula!"

Madam Moray jumped to her feet. "You need a healer immediately, Mr Potter!"

With a dismissive wave of his hand, Harry explained further: "I healed myself just fine and what I couldn't - Loki healed for me."

Loki’s mouth stretched into a self-satisfied grin when everyone’s eyes landed on him; he clearly was enjoying the attention. "What? My magic is more advanced than yours."

"Either way, I managed to escape," Harry continued on, wishing nothing more than to finish his tale. "Even if barely. I summoned the portkey into my hand, believing it would take me back to Hogwarts. But it didn't. I ended up at Tony's."

"I examined this thing you call portkey," Loki drawled, bored. "Harrison's magic itself changed the coordinates. At that moment he must've been wishing for his parents, and his magic listened."

"That's…" Madam Moray was at a loss of words.

"Hard to believe? Yeah." Tony chuckled. "You try having a magical kid drop into your house. He thought we kidnapped him at first."

"Wouldn't you?" Harry crossed his arms, pouting. 

"Why would Peter Pettigrew want to kidnap you?" Madam Moray inquired further.

"Probably because he's a piece of shit and wanted to bring back his darling Dark Lord? He couldn't have been working alone - someone at Hogwarts must've tampered with the portkey and Pettigrew is too much of an idiot to do so."

Mr Wellington pursed his lips. He knew something.

"Alastor Moody is in St Mungos. Someone has been impersonating him all year but the law enforcement couldn't find that person."

Harry's face drained of colour.

"Moody..? But… he gave me tips! Even gave me books to read! Why would he- oh." Harry pinched the bridge of his nose. "Whoever it was was trying to make sure I don't die and reach the cup. And no one would suspect an insane, paranoid Auror who was a friend of Dumbledore's. Bloody hell, it's a perfect disguise if you think about it."

"You didn't go back home after arriving here. Why?" Mr Wellington asked Harry, who could only stare incredulously at the man.

"He was hurt and out of it for days," Tony said dryly, clearly unimpressed. "And do you really think I'd let a teenager that just teleported into my personal quarters just up and leave?"

Wellington, at least, had the decency to look abashed.

"Not to mention his home situation revealed itself pretty quickly, as well as his status as my son. Why would I let him go to England where he's been lied about, hurt, abused and manipulated by people?" Harry flinched. "Especially since that fucker Dumbledore seems to be in the center of it all?"

"Mr Dumbledore is a figure of power in our world, Mr Stark. He holds quite a few powerful positions-"

"One man with so much power? A recipe for a disaster, no? Especially considering all of the manipulative shit he's pulled so far."

"Tony-" Harry put a hand on his father, hoping to calm him down; the man had a temper. "It's fine."

"It fucking well is not fi-"

"We know, Stark, leave it be for now." Loki stood up, hands behind his back as he faced everyone in the room. "Now since Harrison here is in our custody and essentially a citizen of this fine country, I suggest we move along and make a plan to unravel all the mess your media is making. We've read the papers; the rumors are flying wild. Accusations are being made."

"Goblins assured me that your firm is one of the best out there," Tony said, voice steely. "And you better be, for I will be suing every single piece of shit garbage out there who dared to lift a finger against my son. Especially tarnishing the name of an underage kid in papers - it's not exactly legal, is it?"

"Mr Stark-"

"Trust me, I've got the money and I've got the time. If you can't handle it, just say so - I will find someone else, on this or the other side of the pond. I don't care."

"You can't be serious," Harry’s eyes widened. "You can't just sue everyone!"

"Sure I can, kiddo."

"But-"

"Shush. So? Are you willing to take a bite that big?" He turned to the wizard and the witch, grinning. "Did I mention I'm on a first name basis with the president? I'm sure he can speak with yours-"

"Of course we will take it," Madam Moray scoffed, even if she had a small nasty smirk on her face. "Make no mistake, Mr Stark; it will not be pleasant. The name Harry Potter is known just as well worldwide as yours is."

"Don't we make a nice pair, mini-me." Tony ruffled Harry’s hair before jumping back with a yelp. "What the fuck was that?!" He shouted, rubbing his palm.

"Justice," Harry sniffed, smirking. "I assume due to what I said we will need to speak to Aurors as well?"

"What's an Auror?" Tony asked, pouting still. His kid was a menace. 

He was so proud.

"Magical police, if you will," Harry answered easily.

"Unfortunately, yes," Madam Moray nodded. "I assume you'd like to get Mr Black a trial?"

"That would be ideal. I'm sure he'd agree, since he never even got a trial in the first place."

"We knew Britain is a mess, but not to this level," Wellington shook his head. “This thing will blow up like nothing I’ve ever seen before.|

"I'm afraid you're in for a shock," Harry warned. "Would submitting my memories help things along?"

Both of them nodded.

"Yes, you'll just have to use certified vials. I'm sure I have a few up here somewhere," Mr Wellington started rummaging through his briefcase, sticking his entire hand into it.

"How-" Tony was already by his side, staring at a seemingly bottomless briefcase in wonder. "Do you have a black hole in there or something?"

"Extension charms, more likely," Harry grinned at the man, who still had such a need to prove everything by science. Harry was certain he was about to become subject 0 in Tony's experiments with magic. Just the fact his phone wasn’t working here had him miffed.

"Mr Potter is right. Ah, there they are." He pulled out a smaller box which held the vials.

"Um… I've no idea how to extract a memory," he admitted, cheeks flushing red.

"That's alright, I can do it?" Madam Moray offered.

"Walk me through the process?"

Eventually, they had 3 vials of Harry’s memories. One of the night he met Sirius and Pettigrew, of their confession. Another of just before touching the trophy, of Pettigrew killing Cedric. Of cursing Harry, tying him up. Harry stopped the memory precisely at the moment Pettigrew hit him over the head, not wanting to show even the barest hints of a Dark Lord being there at all. He made sure that the small blurry snippet of a memory when he summoned the trophy was visible, how he ended up in Tony’s apartment. There was no need to get Voldemort involved; for some reason, Harry’s instinct screamed to leave him out of this, so, for once, he listened.

He was then asked to show a memory of the Dursleys and he adamantly refused.

"Tony's already got my custody. I'm not showing anyone shit. I don't owe my life to anyone," Harry spat and refused to say another word about this topic.

Then Tony convinced him to give up some memories of the dangers he faces in 'that deathtrap of a school'. "Show them the basilisk."

"Excuse me, the what?" Madam Moray shouted, losing her composure completely. She was holding it together pretty well, but the knowledge of a basilisk seemed to be the last drop.

"Um, there was a basilisk beneath the school. It was Salazar Slytherin's familiar, thousand years old. It was petrifying mu-muggleborns all year long. At the end of the school year, it kidnapped one of the students; school was about to shut down. I- I went to look for it. The girl was my friend's sister and- quite frankly, I would rather have faced the monster than gone back home, so we got a teacher and went into the Chamber of Secrets."

"I've read Hogwarts: the history. It said that room was a legend." Charles Wellington was downright doubtful of Harry. The nerve.

"Yeah, no shit. Because only those who can speak parseltongue can find the entrance and actually get in. Well, that's me: your resident parselmouth."

"Y-you're-"

"What the hell does that word even mean? Hello, a non-magical person here?" Tony waved his hand around, hating to be left out.

"I can speak to snakes," Harry said bluntly, eyeing Tony wearily, waiting for fear to show itself, but it never did. Only shock - fascination even.

"Truly?" Loki perked up, then snapped his fingers.

The next moment, a ten foot snake lay on the table in front of them all.

Everyone but Harry and Loki scrambled away.

"Go on, little seiðr. Show us your magic trick," the god goaded Harry, who simply rolled his eyes.

"You see this arrogant prick next to me? Why don't you scare him a little - I'll give you a tasty rabbit if you do," Harry hissed to the snake, smirking at the gobsmacked and pale faces of the wizards; a fascinated one on Tony's.

"A speaker? An honour," the snake bowed its head, turning to Loki, hissing angrily.

"There's no need for that, little one. Go back home," Loki snapped his fingers and the snake was gone.

Harry’s eyes widened.

"You can speak it too?!"

"Of course," the god grinned. "We, Asgardians, possess something referred to as All-speak. We can understand every and any language there is."

"Wicked!" Harry grinned. "Can you-"

"Could you two stop fucking hissing like maniacs that just escaped from psych ward and speak to us, lowly mortals?"

Loki huffed, eyeing Harry like he was his new golden goose. "Don't be jealous, Stark - Harrison is incredibly gifted."

"Most of the Wizarding World believes parseltongue to be a dark gift and are scared of it. Idiots, eh?"

Loki didn't look amused at all.

"So uh… you want to see the basilisk?"

Madam Moray nodded, her face paler than usual.

Harry wasn't sure how the memory turned out. He didn't show the entrance or anything. He showed snippets; how Fawkes clawed its eyes out. How it chased Harry. How Harry stabbed it. How the phoenix cried on his arm.

They needn't know more.

“So, what happens now?”

“You mentioned that you’re now an American citizen, yes?” Madam Moray asked.

“Yes, he is. Which means I won’t allow anyone to ship off my underage son to another country against his will.” Tony’s eyes darkened. “I’m not sure how much you know about me, but if that were to happen, I have enough armed forced to obliterate that entire fucking island, so - don’t try me.”

“It will not come to that, Mr Stark,” Madam Moray assured him, but everyone in the room could see a glint in her eyes that didn’t promise anything good for anyone who tried. “Since Mr Potter is now a citizen, there is nothing the brits can do. Ideally, with the evidence, we’d contact the Law department, but considering just who Mr Potter is - and who the two of you are - the magnitude of the scandal we’re about to have… we’ll be involving the President as well. We’d then have to contact the people in Britain-” Harry cringed at the thought, “-and proceed from there. You’re obviously neither missing nor kidnapped, and with your testimony and memories, you will be cleared quickly.”

“But considering it was a person who was believed to be dead that kidnapped you and killed your friend, you might need to testify in front of the Congress, Mr Potter.”

Harry wasn’t impressed, but if this is what he had to do to give Sirius his freedom - so be it.

“This will be a shitshow, won’t it?” he asked quietly, already knowing the answer.

The two lawyers’ smiles were sharp and predatory: “No need to worry, Mr Potter,” Madam Moray tried to reassure him, looking like she'd won a prize. “There’s a reason we’re the best out there; with everything you’ve told us so far, we’ll have the Magical Britain by its throat by tomorrow.”

“It’s been a while since we’ve had an international incident of this magnitude, gentleman,” Wellington smirked, looking just as pleased. Were they truly enjoying this? Harry wondered. He was dreading the moment it would all get out in the open, but those two seemed eager. Tony might’ve hired actual psychopaths. “It will be fun.”