SLUDG-E
HPB@GoldenBoy
woke up today and the universe chose violence.
HPB@GoldenBoy
i'm not entirely sure why i've woken up to tony stark trending as my dad.
HPB@GoldenBoy.
he is not my dad.
*******************
"Why are we trending on Twitter?" Harry asked as he strode into the sunny office that Tony was currently sat in.
Not working.
No.
Never working.
Good Grief!!
Tony, picked his head up from where it was laying on the lid of his laptop, and began typing furiously.
"Sorry!!" He gestured to the door. "I'm afraid I'm very busy. I have not had the opportunity to do anything but work all day."
Harry raised a brow. "Your screen's blank." He gestured to the laptop.
Which Tony had shut down.
Before his nap.
"No it's not!!" He shouted, and pressed the on button, which subsequently lead to the man's laptop screeching and wailing as it powered on.
"It always does that." Tony snapped, catching Harry's concerned look.
"No it does not sir." JARVIS intoned. "I believe that the laptop has overheated."
His words were punctuated by the black slab beginning to melt on the table.
Harry couldn't help but snigger at Tony's distraught expression at the black goo now sliding off the edge of his desk.
"It betrayed me." Tony cried, pointing at the sludge now sqealing and bubbling on the floor.
"You have had the computer turned on for the past fifteen days, sir. I think it had finally reached it's limits." JARVIS sounded faintly amused.
"Fifteen days??!!" Harry spluttered. "The poor thing was probably at the end of it's tether. The only option was to self combust."
The black mass on the floor, crawled its way over to Harry, and clung at his shoe desparately.
Harry looked at it, and then picked the surprisingly solid- thing, up and clutched it to his chest.
"You're coming home with me." Harry nuzzled the black sludge to his cheek, and the sludge-preened.
Tony, looked ready to self combust.
"My parents were murdered." Harry said, as he sat on the couch, with SLUDG-E on his lap, twisting through his fingers. "I wasn't joking about that."
Tony, for all his shortcomings, was happy to sit and listen.
"They died for me. They were killed for me." Harry explained. He looked down at SLUDG-E, who was now gently throbbing like it had a pulse, providing some comfort to the unusally morose boy.
"He wanted me. Some stupid prophecy. He believed that I would end him. Me!!?? A tiny baby. Well, I did finish him in the end. But not for revenge. To protect the world I love."
Tony nodded, eyes wet with emotions he would never want to address.
"My dad was killed downstairs. And my mum stood in front of me. She refused to move out of the way. He gave her a chance. Told her that she could just let him through, to get to me. But she was my mother. She wouldn't move. She died in front of me. And then, he tried to kill me anyway. But he failed then. And he failed to kill me every other time he tried. Not because I'm a god. Not because I'm immortal. Because my mother's love protected me."
Harry looked up from where SLUDG-E was crawling up his shirt in a parady of a hug.
"I never got to have my parents. And I love them so much. I'm not saying that I think you'd be a bad dad. I just think that it's not appropriate to be joking, when I have two parents who died for me." Harry looked at Tony slyly.
"Also, you don't want to be saddled with me. Run while you can."
Tony began laughing.
"Thank you for sharing that with me." He said, displaying a very out of character moment of seriousness. "You know you can hit me up for a responsible adult who won't do anything responsible."
There it was. The Tony Harry knew.
Harry smirked. "And you can keep paying me to babysit your sons."
"I'll have you know, Steve's older than me." Tony harrumphed.
"In age. Physicall, and emotionally and everything else, the boy is 22. Light years younger than your 68." Harry scoffed.
"BOY??!! 68??!! You sir, have mortally wounded me!!!!" Tony collapsed to the floor, and SLUDG-E flung itself off Harry to slap the billionaire aroud the face to "revive him."
"Get off!! You are the charred remnants of a laptop. You should not be so. Damn!! Human!!"" Tony picked SlLUDG-E off his chest, and flung him at Harry who looked at him with a wounded expression. The black sludge somehow mirrored his expression, and formed an arm and pointed it at the man. Before blowing a raspberry at him.
"This is why you are not ever the mature adult in the room." Harry said.
And Tony, stuck his tongue out.
In a very mature gesture of annoyance.
IAmIronMan@TinyStank
I had a very weird day. My laptop melted, gained sentience, and I think it is now dating my babysitter for the two old men.
Stop!@There'sABaby
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What happened to #IronDadGoldenBaby?
WhatIsLove@BabyDon'tHurtMe
My heart is broken.
WhatIsLove@BabyDon'tHurtMe
Also, @TinyStank why is that the most coherent thing you've posted in a while?
IAmIronMan@TinyStank
I am always coherant. Don't insult me like that.
*************
IAmIronMAn@TinyStank
While I love @GoldenBoy very much. He had two very loving, amazing parents. Who laid their lives for his own.
After a very deep conversation, in which I did not cry. At. All.
@GoldenBoy explained that his parents were murdered protecting him. They stood tall and proud to try and save his life. And they died heros. I don't want to sully their memory by being foolish.
If I were to have Harry as my son, I'd announce it properly, and adopt him properly. For now, he's my precious babysitter for two blond idiots, and a dear friend. If you see him out and about with Thor and Steve, please do not pester him. He deserves respect and privacy. Thank you.
Tony Stark
smackmyass@likeadrum
Tony Stark in his serious era.
I'm here for it.
HPB@GoldenBoy
@TinyStank I think my parents would be happy that I found you.