Chapter 2
Dorcas looks like she is about to fall asleep at the table. With a blank look she stares at her coffee as if expecting a reaction.
It‘s the first real day of school and even Regulus, who never really sleeps much, feels tired.
„It‘s ridiculous that Barty and Evan both got a free period now“, Dorcas complains. And Regulus nods in agreement, too tired to actual participate in a conversation. While he and Dorcas had to get up early to go to their classes, both of his roommates were still happily asleep.
„We should find out who creates the fucking timetables“, he mutters, his head now completely resting on the table. „And then? Blackmail them into giving us the free periods?“
„Maybe. Or torture.“ Dorcas let‘s out a laugh. „Sounds a bit dramatic, Reg but I‘m in. A girl has to do what a girl has to do to get her sleep.“
He lifts his head for a moment to pour himself another cup of coffee. Black, obviously. „What subject do you even have now?“
She groans. „History of Magic. I will probably die out of boredom.“ Thinking of Professor Binns, this was a likely option. Binns is not exactly known for its particularly lively teaching. In fact, quite the opposite, considering that he is already dead.
„Look“, he tries to argue: „At least you can sleep some more. History of Magic may be boring but it‘s basically a free period. You are right up with Barty and Evan.“
She takes a bite from her toast. „And you have Potions, old Sluggy loves you. He would probably adopt you, if he could. Just ask him something about his holiday and listen to his forty minutes monologue.“
Regulus just shakes his head, or at least tries it. It‘s quite hard if your head is laying flat on a table. „That would be even worse. I‘m trying to talk as less to the man as I possibly can. Which will be quite a challenge, especially when I have to go to his parties again.“
„Just don‘t go. I don‘t see why you‘re making such a fuss about it. Yes, you will probably lose the title of his favorite student but it‘s not like you ever cared if someone liked you.“
Regulus raises his head again and now rests it on his hand. „I can‘t. I plan on using his private brewing rooms this year. I‘m really relying on the fact that I‘m his favorite student“, he explains.
His plan was it to ask him later, after the lesson. He wanted to try a few new potion recipes and that would be easier, if he could it without a teacher supervising him.
„Honestly Reg, you’re such a nerd. You can have my Potions homework too, if you‘re so keen on brewing something.“ She eats the last bite of her toast. „So, I‘m ready to go.“
„One second“, he gulps down the rest of his coffee all at once. He never eats something in the morning, which Dorcas has to point out again, while leaving the Hall. „I still think you should eat more. You know what they say, breakfast is the most important meal of the day.“
He groans, they have this discussion every morning for years now. „And you know I call bullshit on that. Try getting through a day without breakfast, easy. Now try getting through a day without lunch, way harder, isn‘t it?“
„You say that as if you don't skip lunch regularly too. Sometimes I actually worry about you Reg.“ He could see in her face that she was sincere, which made him feel really bad. The last thing he wants is for people to worry about him.
The truth is that he is simply not used to eating three full meals a day and, as a result, is often not hungry. In Grimmauld Place, family meals were never a pleasant affair, so over the years he got into the habit of eating the bare minimum to avoid dragging it out. Add to that the many times his mother sent him and Sirius to bed without food and this is what you get.
„It‘s not like that. I just wasn‘t hungry. We meet up at lunch later, I promise“, Regulus tries to defend himself and looks at her expectantly. Thankfully she just nods and doesn‘t question it further. He exhales in relief.
They walk down the last corridor in silence together before they have to part ways. „See you at lunch“, Dorcas reminds him again, before she walks into a different direction.
When he enters the classroom, he is relieved to see many empty seats. Only two Slytherin girls from his year are already there, both sitting on one of the front tables. He doesn‘t pay them any attention and sits down at the back of the class.
He is hoping that not many other students took Potions this year and he could stay undisturbed and alone.
For a short while it seems like his prayers were heard. One more Slytherin girl joins the others in the front and a group of Gryffindor girls gets their own table but no one comes close to him.
At least until Dean McKinnon out of all people, enters the classroom. He is looking around the room for a moment, seemingly searching for the best place to sit and then marches through the entire classroom to sit down right next to Regulus.
Regulus looks at him in disbelief. What does this boy actually think he is doing?
„You can‘t sit here!“ Dean looks him directly in the eyes. „Sorry, is this seat taken?“, he asks mockingly. He knows as good as Regulus that no one is sitting there.
„You know it isn‘t but that‘s not the point“, he retorts angrily. He is starting to get really sick of the Gryffindor.
„Then I don‘t see why I can‘t sit here“, Dean answers with a smug smile on his face and starts to unpack his books.
„You know what, I‘m just going to move. You are not worthy of my time, McKinnon.“ But just as he gets up from his seat, the door opens again and Professor Slughorn enters.
It seems like Slughorn interprets his standing up completely wrong because first thing he says is: „Ah Mr Black, you don‘t need to get up. We are all friends here. A simple hello is enough.“
Regulus can hear Dean trying to suppress his laugh as he mumbles something in agreement and gets back down on the seat. He will actual commit murder, if he has to endure any of this any longer.
„Worked like a charm, Black.“ Regulus doesn‘t look back to McKinnon but gives him a small kick under the table.
The lesson starts off easy. Slughorn, who seems to be in a particularly good mood today, gives a lecture over his summer. Regulus does not give a fuck about anything he says but right now he is thankful for every minute he doesn‘t have to work with McKinnon.
Mindlessly he starts to draw on a piece of parchment. At this point he is not listening at all. Just as he finishes his artwork, a quickly drawn sketch of Lunar, and puts his initials in the corner, force of habit, he gets hit by McKinnon‘s elbow in the side.
Annoyed he looks back to him. „What?“
Dean, who does not looks apologetic at all just, shrugs. „Thought you might want to hear what Slughorn has given us as a task. We are potions partners by the way.“
Regulus groans, what did he do to deserve this? Slughorn was known for sorting his pupils into groups of two at the beginning of the school year. And you had to follow this grouping, swapping partners was not allowed.
„Fuck me“, he mumbles under his breath and Dean next to him starts coughing uncontrollably. Regulus looks at him in irritation. „What is going on with you, McKinnon?“ „Sorry", Dean coughs again. „Choked."
How was he supposed to endure this idiot for a year?
The rest of the lesson luckily goes around quickly. They don‘t have to actual brew a potion yet, it‘s more about researching some ingredients and while doing so Regulus can easily ignore McKinnon. Not much to the latter's delight, who has been trying to draw Regulus's attention to him for the entire time. It was quite annoying.
As Slughorn dismisses them and Regulus packs up his stuff extra slowly. He still wants to talk to the professor about using the private brewing rooms. McKinnon gives him a weird look when he still makes no effort of leaving. „Are you coming?“
And now it‘s Regulus who stares at the other in confusion. „I don‘t know what you are trying to archive but stop it. We are not friends and we never will be friends. I don‘t associate with people like you, McKinnon.“ Dean stiffens up at the last part.
„I should have known you were exactly like everyone said.“ His usual grin vanished from his face and Regulus could see the anger in his eyes. „Yeah? What is everyone saying about me? That I‘m evil? A sadist? Like everyone else in my family? Because I am, Dean. I was born a Black and I will die one.“
He isn‘t actually as secure in this statement as he made it sound like. Yes, he was born a Black but he also knows he is different from the rest of his family. But his self-acceptance problems could wait as long as he could get rid of McKinnon.
Something is changing in Dean‘s face but to Regulus‘s surprise it‘s not anger that shows. It‘s something different, It's something else and Regulus can't quite place it, but McKinnon suddenly gives him a smirk.„You called me Dean“, he says as if that would explain everything.
And with that McKinnon turns around and leaves Regulus in confusion.
°°°
It‘s late at night and Regulus can‘t sleep.
He has been turning around in his bed for hours now when he decides to do something useful instead. Getting more literature about Occlumeny. He did finish his last book just this evening.
Quietly he sneaks out of the dorm room, thankfully Barty and Evan are already asleep.
Regulus doesn't bother tiptoeing through the corridors. As a prefect, he is well aware of who is controlling what part of the castle at what time and he is not worried at all about Filch. He befriended Mrs Norris years ago, so she never rats him out.
When he arrives at the library, he heads straight for the restricted section. The truly interesting books were always there.
It‘s not his first time there either. He has been doing his own research here for years. The magic that Hogwarts did not teach was often much more fascinating and although he realised that he was not like the rest of his family, there was still something about dark magic that attracted him.
Just as he takes a book titled "Occlumency - A wizard's most useful skill" from the shelf, he hears a loud rumbling and swearing.
„I told you Pads, we are too old to all fit under the cloak. Look what happened, you nearly knocked a shelf over.“ Fuck him, he knew that voice. It belongs to no other than James Potter. And if Potter is here, his brother is not far away.
He looks around if there is somewhere to hide but right now he stands in a dead end between two shelves. Nowhere to hide, he could only hope that his brother and his idiot friends would only stay in the front rows of the library.
Regulus could hear his breath quickening. The last thing he needed was another encounter with his brother.
„Well, as long as you don’t have any other cloaks hidden in our room, I don’t see what else we should do. If anything it’s Moony‘s fault for being so goddamn tall.“
Regulus could hear someone chuckling. „Now you start complaining about my height. I can think of multiple situations of when you told me something really different.“
„Oh shut up, I‘m never telling you something nice again“, more laughing follows.
A fourth voice peaks up: „We should focus on the important things. I don't want to spend more time here than necessary.“ He could hear his brother‘s laugh as a responds.
„Are you scared we are getting detention Wormy?“
The voice sounds indignant now. „Not scared but I don‘t fancy it either. You can polish all those trophies again if you want. I won‘t stop you.“
Before his brother could respond again, and Regulus knew him well enough to know he had something to say, Potter‘s voice interrupts him. „Pete‘s right. We need to find the right book, otherwise our prank won‘t work.“
For a moment, there is a complete silence but but then Regulus can hear the Marauders searching the rows of books. They are awfully loud and he starts to wonder how they ever got away with anything.
Unfortunately for him, they don't seem to find what they‘re looking for and get closer and closer to his row. „By Merlin, why is it always me“, he mumbles and hides his book under his robe. As less as Sirius could conclude from his presence here, the better for him.
„Maybe in the back“, Sirius nearly shouts. He is really close to Regulus now. „Wait, I‘ll look there.“ He could hear his brother stepping even closer and suddenly the two Black brothers are standing directly opposite each other.
„Sirius“, he greets his brother as calm as he can, trying not to show his nervousness towards him.
„Reggie? What the hell are you doing here?“, Sirius sounds confused, you could hear that he really did not expect Regulus to be here.
„I could ask you the same thing, brother.“
Now anger flashes over Sirius face. „I can assume what you‘re doing here. You‘re a Black after all, aren‘t you. You are probably looking for some dark spells to torture some Muggle-borns with.“
Regulus could feel the anger heating up his body but he is trying his best to look unbothered by Sirius remarks.
„I‘m not the only Black in the restricted section right now. If I were you I would think twice before spreading such accusations.“
Sirius stares at him furiously. „You and I know that we are not the same. You were always mother‘s favorite boy, the perfect heir and a true Black.“
Regulus exhales slowly to regain his composure. His brother may be the biggest idiot he ever had to endure.
„You are right about that. I am a Black and, unlike you, I have not forgotten where I come from. But you know well enough that the perfect heir is a lie. I‘m the second born, the spare one, I will never be good enough.“
With these words he begins to leave. He bumps his shoulder extra hard into Sirius, as he walks past him.
Regulus just marches straight out of the library without giving a single glance to his brother's friends.
In the background he can make out a confused Potter asking: "Was that little Black? What is he doing here? Fuck, how is Sirius?"