Normal normal stuff
Dazai was jittery, from the nightmare he had been dealt that night. That jitteriness lasted even after the sun rose and peeked through the night’s clouds.
But he had to continue, he had to be the demon everyone wanted and everyone hated. He had to play his part, feelings didn’t matter when you were to play an emotionless monster on the stage.
He was the lead, a puppet being played, a pawn bring moved across the board by Mori.
“Your move Hogwarts” Dazai could hear in the back of his head, challenging the wizards with every new move he had his little demon student make.
Mori’s voice seemed to always make its way into his thoughts when he felt vulnerable, maybe it was his minds way of staying strong.
To think of that slimy man and make him hide his emotion.
Whatever his brain was doing, had worked, he felt wiped clean, standard, plain, blank.
A fresh start to a new day.
_____
Dazai was early to breakfast today unlike the day before, but like yesterday he had no desire to eat. So he set it head down with a thud against the table and waited.
His mind was still on the slimy doctor, and his nightmare, he couldn’t think about anything but it; like his brain had forgotten everything else in the world and the nightmare was the only thing that mattered.
But it didn’t matter, it was all made up by his head, it didn’t hold any place in his plans, it didn’t hold any place on the stage. He needed to forget, it needed to be flushed out from his brain, like many other things that lurked in its shadows.
He shives the thought away for the time being, though it would only be a matter of time until it engulfed him once again.
Dazai settled to try and get a few minutes worth of shut eye, he would desperately need it.
About five, maybe six minutes later, chatter started to echo in the Great Hall, symbolizing that more of the students were waking up and arriving for breakfast.
He picks his head up just as he feels a warm hand on his shoulder, he can’t help the flinch that follows as he quickly whips his head around to see the owner of the hand.
“You alright Dazai?” Blaise asked, he was surprised when Dazai flinched, though he tried to hide it when he asked his question.
Dazai blinks and relaxes as Blaise settles down next to him, “Of course! Why wouldn’t I be~?” He drawls with a wobbly smile, it wasn’t meant to be wobbly; he couldn’t show weakness, he mentally kicks himself for it.
“Well, you flinched when I touched you, I had assumed you were deep in thought about something again.” Blaise says thoughtfully, not failing to notice the wobbliness of Dazai’s smile but he decides not to comment on it, as he lets the hand that was once on Dazai’s shoulder fall onto the table with a quiet thump.
“Oh, I’m alright! I was just thinking about ways to annoy our professors today!” He says with a giggle as he rubs his hands together in an excited display.
Blaise chuckles behind his hand, “If you say so boss.” He smiles gently at Dazai, then starts to plate his breakfast.
Dazai watches intently over Blaise, trying not to look over at their professors, as much as he liked analyzing them and silently laughing at their foolishness, Dazai couldn’t help but think of how much Snape looked like Mori.
That enough was reason not to look over at the professors, especially because of the nightmare, there he goes thinking about the nightmare again. Dazai slips his hand under his robe sleeve and itches at his bandages, he needs to stop thinking about it, he couldn’t be vulnerable.
“Dazai.”
Blaise’s voice pulled dazai out of his thoughts, “Yep?” He replies as he stops scratching at his bandages for the time being.
“Is..the reason you’re acting like this, this morning..because you feel the need to uhm do that again?” Blaise asks, trying to figure out ways to censor it so no one who sticks their nose into the conversation will be able to understand what they’re talking about.
Dazai almost laugh, “No, no, don’t you worry so much Blaise! I’m okay, promise!” He chirps.
He hears Blaise sigh at the reply he receives, but breakfast isn’t the time to question and bombard Dazai with questions; as much as he wouldn’t like to, Blaise drops the subject.
But there’s a little voice in Dazai’s head that tells him it won’t be the end of Blaise worrying about him because of his cuts.
Dazai was starting to regret letting his second in command help him with those, because things would be a lot easier without the added worries from him; but Blaise was a smart cookie, he would have probably figured it out with or without Dazai showing him.
______
“Are you hungry?” Blaise asks Dazai, seeing as he hasn’t eaten yet or put anything on his plate.
Blaise was contemplating just putting food on there and try to coerce Dazai into eating it; he had failed yesterday morning, but he wouldn’t fail again.
“Nope!” Dazai says, popping the ‘p’ in the word with much enthusiasm.
Blaise sighs, “Why not?” He retorts with a small frown tugging at his lips.
“Because, I’m not hungry.” He says to him.
Blaise sighs again, “You need to eat something Dazai, you’ll starve if you keep doing this to yourself.” He says, eyes shimmering with concern.
Dazai shuffles and moves in his seat uncomfortably, starving sounded painful, and he didn’t like pain, or dying in pain. So he sighed loudly and dramatically, “Fineeeee, but not a lot.” He decides.
Blaise nods his head and grabs a piece of toast and some fruit for him, the fruit looked quite colorful; Dazai was kind of mesmerized and didn’t want to eat it because the color was so pretty.
But he could feel Blaise’s worried eyes on him, so he thought a quick ‘sorry’ for the fruit and popped it into his mouth.
It was nice and sweet, Dazai didn’t mind sweet things and actually preferred them, so he made a little content noise as he broke off a piece of the toast.
He chewed a bit then swallowed the fruit, he waited a bit longer before popping the broken off piece of toast into his mouth.
It was an extremely slow way to eat, and showed off the picky eater in him, but he didn’t really care, because he saw the smile that was on Blaise’s face as he watched him eat and he felt proud of himself.
Maybe eating wasn’t so bad? Especially when he didn’t think about disgusting, or particularly slimy things. Especially with Blaise.