6 - saturate me, i can't get enough
“Remus, love, please can you go to the back and retrieve a copy of ‘The Tales of Beedle the Bard’ for our customer, Miss Potts, here? It seems that there are no longer any left in the children’s fiction bookcase.”
Remus nodded in confirmation at his boss, Mrs Mira Maxime, who was the rather pleasant, plump middle-aged lady that owned ‘Mrs Maxime’s Collection of Novels, Trinkets and More!’, and made his way to the back of the shop dutifully.
It had been a week since ‘returning’ to this job and he could confidently say that he rather enjoyed it. After his magic-failing ensued breakdown, he and Sirius had thought out a different approach to create some normality back into his life. That approach being work.
Apparently, this Remus had been working full-time at a bookshop before everything had happened and luckily, he didn’t require magic to execute the job’s responsibilities. What was even better was that because he was occupied with his work now, he had begun to see less and less of the unhelpful Healer Rooks – a small blessing out of all the less-than-lucky circumstances.
“Oh, thank you, dear!” Mrs Maxime said when he returned to the front of the shop, handing the storybook back to her. “I think there are a couple shelves to sort through by the Hogwarts-required books section, if you wouldn’t mind completing that before your shift ends.”
Since working here, Remus had been itching to get his hands on a book that could lead to potential answers as to how he was in this alternate world. Why he had transported to such a place. But he had been abiding his time, settling back into the job and getting the hang of things before he asked other questions.
Yes, it had only been a week since he started – a week too long of not researching explanations, if you asked him – but Remus was becoming antsy waiting as it was very possible that he was closer than ever to solutions. He could almost taste the words on his tongue every day as he passed the shelves of books every day, hoping that one of them would whisper the key to all the answers he required in his ear.
So, he had decided at the end of his shift today, he would ask Mrs Maxime if she had any books that could help him. It was the very least he could do, and it was the first viable action in all his time here that could lead to some sort of resolution.
As the time gradually passed and it was time to leave, he haphazardly pulled his arms through his jacket and then lifted his bag strap across his chest, letting the bag rest low by the side of his hip. He walked back through from the back of the store, where his belongings had been kept whilst he worked, to the shop’s main counter, where his boss was sat perched on a tall stool, sorting through some magical bookmarks.
“Um, Mrs Maxime? Could I ask you something before I head off?”
“Yes of course, dear. What is it?”
“Would you happen to know whether you have a book on time-travel? Or something to do with dimension travelling?”
“Oh,” Mrs Maxime asked as she looked up from the counter, her fingers pausing their movements entirely. “Is there any particular reason as to why you’d require a novel on such a topic, Remus?”
“Er, I’m just quite curious about the subject, to be honest. Wanted to do some research about the technicalities and all of that kind of thing.” He replied to the older woman, trying to be casual about it. So relaxed and offhanded, as if his own existence, along with the existence of the prior-Remus whose body he had hijacked, didn’t depend on the possible answers such a book could give.
“I, well-” Mrs Maxime’s voice was warm as she furrowed her brows, turning her expression to one of dampened sympathy. “It’s quite unfortunate really. You see, the Ministry passed a law a decade or so ago where, legally, one cannot sell any books to do with that subject matter.”
“Ah, I see.”
“Yes, apparently a wizard had a catastrophically bad time-travelling experience – one that he tried to do himself with no professional help, where the only help he required was from a book relating to time-travel. As it turns out, the said novel had a spelling mistake in it – and this is why I’m a big advocate for a self-writing quill! Spelling is truly such a very important thing; I’ll have you know!” Mrs Maxime’s hands flew out in front of her, dropping the bookmarks down onto the counter as she passionately spoke.
“But nevertheless, that simple spelling error caused a mishap within this wizard’s experiment, and he ended up never returning back to his original time. According to some of my Ministry friends, he was said to be lost in time forever, never found or heard of again. It’s all very sad indeed. And so, the Ministry was forced to enact such a law to prevent such cases from reoccurring.”
Remus couldn’t help the disappointed look that crossed his face at the other woman’s words. Before he could thank her for her time, Mrs Maxime, who had seen his crestfallen face, looked around the shop to make sure there were no customers and then shuffled forward on her seat, opening her mouth to speak again.
“But, I mean, since you have been such a loyal, hardworking employee all these years, perhaps I can make an exception. Bear with me, I’ll be back in a second.”
As Mrs Maxime retreated to the back of her shop, Remus’s body felt jittery as the moments ticked on and at every creak of the bookshop’s old, wooden floors, his heart jolted. It took an age, but she returned with a shuffle behind him that was the only indication to him of her return before she re-entered his eyesight.
“Here, Remus.” Mrs Maxime’s voice was lower as she held a book tightly against her chest. “I have found something that might be of use. But you must promise me you won’t do anything stupid, yes?”
“Of course, Mrs Maxime.” He responded in a softer, grateful tone as she held the book out for him to take. “Thank you so much, I truly am very grateful.”
The plump woman nodded with a satisfied, short nod as she started organising some books nearby the counter. Remus looked down at the novel now in his hands – it’s simple, indistinguishable title of ‘Zathar Norwood’s Discovery of Time’ covered the front with delicate, golden text and he could feel the slight layer of dust on its spine that had begun to stick onto several sections of his fingers. He placed it into his bag carefully, not wanting to cause the book any damage.
“Do you need me to return this to you by a particular time?” Remus enquired, hoping that he would be able to retain the book long enough to analyse its contents properly.
“Oh no!” Mrs Maxime laughed as she looked up at him. “That book has been hidden away for long enough! I’m sure it’ll enjoy being finally put to use. Just return it back to me when you have gained all the research you require.”
Remus nodded and thanked her again as he made his way to the shop’s front door, only to stop mid-step when his boss’s voice called out once more.
“Oh, and Remus?”
“Yes?”
“Please tell no one of our little exchange today, yes? Otherwise, neither you nor I will have jobs anymore, you understand?”
Mrs Maxime’s voice was light and airy but as he looked into her eyes, Remus could sense the heavy seriousness that lingered behind them.
“What exchange are you talking about?” Remus replied with a wide-eyed look, a small smirk overtaking his expression.
“I always knew you were the right person to hire.” His boss responded with an air of confidence seeping through her tone. “Now, off you pop! Have a good weekend, dear.”
As he wished Mrs Maxime a good weekend too and offered his farewells, Remus felt an optimism overcome him. Fuck, he might be able to finally have some understanding. He could’ve cried at the thought of it. The book weighed his bag down as he exited the shop and, even though he could feel the heaviness press down as he took each step, he felt surprisingly light.
Answers might be near, he thought, but only time would tell what they could possibly entail.
///
Remus sighed in satisfaction as he closed to door to the flat. The walk back from his work had been lovely, full of a fresh breeze and bright blue skies. He had even stopped by at the park nearby Mrs Maxime’s shop and given himself some time to pause, watching the everyday beauty of the world; how the mischievous squirrels scampered around the trunks of trees in search of a new acorn to devour and how the occasional dog that passed him had playfully barked at its owner as it desperately waited to be thrown a tennis ball.
Sirius’s flat was the opposite of that park with no chirping birds or woofing hounds or murmuring wind to occupy its space. It was so quiet even though he thought that the other man was supposed to be at home, but he didn’t think too much of it. Perhaps the Black man had decided to sporadically meet up with a friend or was out and about running some errands.
This idea, however, was soon proven very wrong. As Remus wandered into the living room, a bent over figure on the sofa appeared before him. Sirius. A Sirius who, as of current, was sniffling with some scrunched up kitchen roll beside him.
“Hey, Pads.” Remus moved his way closer to the other man’s hunched over figure. “What’s going on?”
The man in question snapped his head up at Remus’s words and the ex-lycanthrope was able to fully see his friend’s face. Sirius was flushed with red rings around his bloodshot eyes, a look of muted anguish adorning his face. A look that Remus ultimately interpreted as utter defeat.
“Oh, sorry.” The Black man responded, his voice rougher and thicker than its usual tone. “I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.”
“I would’ve been back later, but Mrs Maxime let me leave earlier today since it’s a Friday. What’s happened, mate? Are you okay?”
“I, um, yeah. I just received a letter today.” Sirius snivelled and, as Remus got closer, he could clearly see the tears staining the other man’s cheeks. “From my parents.”
Shit. Sirius’s parents, Walburga and Orion Black, had occupied little to none of their conversations over the past weeks. Even so, it had become pretty obvious that, no matter what had happened, the two of them were no longer active participants in either of their sons’ lives.
“Oh, shit Pads. I’m so sorry.”
“Yeah, thanks. It was full of their usual bullshit like ‘oh Sirius, you’re a disgrace’ and the ‘you’ll never be loved’ spiel all ‘cuz I didn’t accept the arranged marriage they wanted me to have, like, five years ago.” Sirius paused as he took a deep, shaky breath.
“And I know, they’re wrong and completely fucked in the head but still. It shouldn’t affect me like this, but I just can’t make it not, you know? Honestly, Moony, what’s fucking wrong with me? Why can’t I just let their words stop hurting?”
The Black man shook uncontrollably as he pushed his hands into his face. It broke Remus’s heart to see the other in such all-consuming pain. Without thinking, he found his body moving on its own, dropping by Sirius’s slouched frame and wrapping his arms around the other man.
“It’s absolutely terrible how they have treated you. How they continue to treat you with such blatant disregard.” Remus murmured softly as the black-haired man collapsed into his hold, his head burying into the ex-lycanthrope’s ink-stained jumper. “But fuck Pads, it’s okay to feel. Of course, their words are still going to hurt, even if you know within yourself that what they say means absolute shite.
“Parents, whether we like or not, are almost always going to provoke a reaction out of us. Yearning for their kindness is not something to berate yourself about, no matter how unreasonable you may think it is. And so, it’s okay to be sad about it, to be angry at what they never could give you. Take as much time as you need to feel those emotions and, when you feel ready, I’ll be here.”
Remus couldn’t say how long he spent there, seated on the sofa with the older Black brother in his embrace, sobbing. But the time didn’t matter. He would’ve spent decades remaining there if it helped Sirius in even the most miniscule way.
“Fuck, Moons.” Sirius’s voice was croaky as he leaned back from the ex-lycanthrope’s chest. “When did you learn to speak like that? Holy shit.”
“Oh, I’m sorry if I-”
“No, don’t apologise. It was just what I needed.” Sirius interrupted his hasty apology, giving him a soft smile. “Like, wow. You said everything I needed to hear. Thank you.”
“You don’t need to thank me, Sirius.” Remus squeezed the other man’s thigh, his eyes looking into Sirius’s bloodshot pair. “You never need to thank me for being here for you when you’re struggling.”
“I- Just.” The Black man spluttered as his heartfelt gaze diverted from Remus for a split second before his grey eyes stared back with a fondness that made Remus’s own body warm. “You’re… yeah.”
“Yeah?” Remus’s voice had a playful hint in it as he responded. Sirius hummed with a slight nod and, before he could reply, Remus continued. “I’ll have to submit a form to the Ministry to let them know that my official name has been changed to ‘yeah’, then.”
“Merlin, that was so bad, Moons!” Sirius lightly tapped on the ex-lycanthrope’s chest and scrunched his nose in displeasure. Although, Remus could see that the other man couldn’t stop an amused smile from spreading his lips.
“I think you rather liked it really.”
“Absolutely not!” The Black man replied, still smiling. “My emotions are just, like, so all over the place right now that my reactions aren’t accurate at the moment.”
“Sure.” Remus dragged out the word, layering it with a thick coat of sarcasm. “But honestly, Pads, is there anything that you want to do? Anything you need?”
“Hmm.”
“And I mean anything. I’ll even rush down to that gelato place you’ve been wanting to try and order you a multitude of flavours.” Remus said as he comforted the other red-faced man. “’Cuz fuck your parents and what they think.”
“Hear, hear!” Sirius’s wetly chuckled, his lip still lightly quivering. “Well, there is one thing but, like, I don’t know whether it’s a good idea with all that’s happened, you know.”
Remus waited patiently, cocking his eyebrow as he waited for his friend to continue the words because no, he did not have a clue what Sirius was bloody implying. Because why in the hell would him being memory-less have an influence on what the Black man wanted to do?
“Look, when this shit usually happens, all of us – you, Prongs, Pete, you know, the whole gang – go out dancing at some stupid muggle club. It started as a one-off thing when I was, like, freshly eighteen to get my mind off the bullshit my parents said but, funnily enough, it’s kind of become a silly tradition.”
“So, let’s do it.”
“But, like, are you up for it?” Sirius questioned back; his mouth pursed in hesitation as he lent into Remus’s touch. “It was never really your scene before even though you’d always come anyways. And you’ve been working so hard so, like, you really don’t have to come if you’re not feeling like it.”
“Mate, it’s been nearly two bloody months since everything all took place and I’ve been feeling much, much better. I’ll be fine, I promise. Plus, who knows, maybe the club will be my scene now.”
“Yeah, right.” Sirius scoffed and gave him a look of pure disbelief. “I’ll believe that when I see it, Moons.”
“Well then be prepared to become my number one fan, Pads. You have no clue what I’ve got up my sleeve.”
A second scoff from the Black man caused Remus to huff loudly and move Sirius out of his embrace, playfully cross his arms over his chest in faux offence.
“You mock me now, but you will regret ever saying those words!”
“Okay, I’ll believe you for now, but I have my doubts. Now, it’s time for the most important thing: to decide what you’re wearing! I’m thinking you’d look good in the purple harness this time.”
“The purple what-now?” Remus’s voice jolted up a tone as the other man nodded nonchalantly.
“Oh, did I not mention it?” The Black man replied as he sat his body up before standing. “The club we usually go to is kink friendly.”
“What?” Remus nearly screeched at the words, absolutely unprepared at what his friend had just said.
“Oh, Merlin.” Sirius, the evil person he was, cackled heartedly. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head, Moons. I’m only joking.”
Remus let out a breath of relief. He wasn’t sure how he’d react seeing his best friend in a full leather yet alone going to a place where everyone would be wearing similar get-ups. After all, he was still adapting to his younger body and, truly, he still felt like a grandad on some occasions. A night out to the club alone was enough of a shock to his system. For Merlin’s sake, in his old life, he’d have been in bed by nine with a warm cup of tea!
“No, that’s not on the cards for tonight. Though they are doing a fab themed night next Saturday so maybe that’ll be next week’s excursion!”
“Huh?”
Remus’s heart fluttered as he let Sirius, the bastard who was still chortling, pull him up from the sofa. The Black man dragged him into his bedroom, not answering any of Remus’s questions about what he had meant. Ultimately, he brushed of the inquiries with a devilish smile and subjected the ex-lycanthrope to a criminal number of outfit changes. When it was the black-haired man’s turn to decide an outfit, Remus found himself with slight disappointment settling in his stomach. It would turn out that none of Sirius’s outfits ended up involving leather, to his surprising dismay.
///
After joining this new world, Remus had come to realise that Sirius Black was many things. He was funny, charismatic and ever-so silly on occasion. He was a deeper thinker than he wanted anyone to know. Unbeknownst to him, he was ending up being the closest thing that gave Remus the ability to feel carefree, to experience genuine happiness.
He had seen the Black man in various states over his time here; whether that be the grogginess that overcame Sirius when he stumbled out of his bedroom barely awake or the giggles he released when Remus’s quips caught him off his guard. Or, the most recent state added to his collection, was how Sirius quietened whilst he was in the midst of solemn despair. But, out of all the situations he had seen the other man in, Remus hadn’t ever seen this.
Sirius was glowing.
The purples and blues from the club’s lighting shone across his hair, creating cerulean swirls that curled around his body. His skin was veiled with a thin sheen of sweat that made him radiate multi-coloured iridescence and every now and then his piercings would catch the light as he casually swayed his head back and forth. Dancing to the loud, pumping music with a careless smile decorating his face, Remus could truly say that Sirius Black looked positively gorgeous. Godlike, even.
Remus was entrapped in a trance, standing on the sidelines of the dance floor whilst he was forced to continue watching the Black man. It felt like nothing – not the lights or the clusters of people surrounding him or the ever-so noisy music – could knock him out of such an ensnaring daze. Even when Sirius’s grey gaze focused on him, Remus didn’t look away. No, instead he returned the strong stare the other man was giving him, engaging in a strangely tense showdown of eye contact.
Sirius, with his pupils blown, raised an eyebrow coolly as his eyes wandered down the ex-lycanthrope’s form. He beckoned Remus to join him on the dance floor.
Remus’s heart sped terribly at the thought of it. Perhaps it was best to sit out of this one if his body was reacting so extreme to such a request. He declined the other man’s silent invitation, pointing at his drink as he shook his head and felt his gut clench at the look on Sirius’s face: disappointment.
“Mate!” The familiar voice of Peter Pettigrew burst his focus on Sirius as the shorter man stumbled closely to him. “Haven’t seen you in bloody ages! How ‘ave you been doing?”
His old-self – the one who could barely get a sentence out at the thought of Pettigrew – would’ve been unable to manage such an interaction, but Remus hadn’t stayed so long in this world for him not to be able to speak to ghosts. And, perhaps after everything, this world’s Peter was a normal, decent human being; a person who didn’t commit mass betrayals and murders. Remus had to give him a chance at the very least to prove that he wasn’t the terrible, twisted person that he had once known.
“I’ve been, uh, good, yeah.” Remus replied loudly over the loud music, nodding at his own words. “I started back at my old job to try and get back into the groove of things.”
“Oh, nice! How’s your boss – hm, was her name Mrs Max-something? – treating you?”
“It’s Mrs Maxime, yes. And she’s been wonderful to me, thanks. Although I’ve learnt, no matter the circumstance, to never mention Madame Malkin’s robe shop in her presence at all.” Remus leaned closer to Peter as he purposely widened his eyes. “Apparently the two of them are mortal enemies! I’m not completely sure as to why but I did hear some mutterings about it having something to do with a botched robe and indecent exposure.”
Peter’s face, that was already flushed from the alcohol he had been drinking, became even pinker as he snorted.
“Blimey! No wonder Mrs Maxime holds a grudge, I would too if indecent exposure was involved.”
“Exactly! But not a single soul told me about this and so imagine my surprise when I happened to mention Madame Malkin in casual conversation and Mrs Maxime stumbled and ended up toppling over an entire bookcase with her! Luckily, she performed a couple of spells, and it was all back as it was in no time.”
“Thank Merlin for magic, Moony. Otherwise, you’d have been there for hours tidying all that up!”
Yes, thank Merlin for magic. The very same magic that he was still unable to use. Remus held back a wince as the belligerent thoughts streamed into his mind, but he forced himself to shut them down. Now wasn’t the time nor place for such a dreary mentality.
Instead, Remus forced out a breathy laugh and averted his gaze back onto the dance floor, searching for Sirius’s location. As he combed over the crowd slowly, he found the task harder than he had prior imagined as it seemed to be that the Black man had moved from his original location.
Clumps of brunettes and blondes blurred in his gaze as he continued his search and… wait, was that Sirius kissing someone? The black-haired man was wearing the same clothes as Sirius had been, with an extremely similar body outline as his friend too. It had to be him, but fuck, who was the Black man lip-locked with?
“Looks like Marls and Padfoot are back at it again.” Peter muttered next to him and Remus whipped his head around at the off-handed comment. That’s right, of course! James had mentioned about the two of them having a fling of some sorts weeks ago, but Remus had completely forgotten.
“How long have they been, uh,” Remus paused slightly as he tried to find the right words to use. “Doing this?”
“Oh, when have they not is the question.” The smaller blonde man beside him said, taking a slug of his drink before continuing. “They’ve had this bantering push-and-pull shit for I’d say at least a couple of years.”
A couple of years and James had the audacity to call it a ‘fling’. Remus felt his stomach clench as he started to understand the length of Marlene and Sirius’s… closeness.
“Oh, right.” He swallowed as he spoke, trying to keep his voice clear. “That’s quite an extensive amount of time.”
“Yeah, it’s become a running joke within our group that by the time we’re all sixty, the two of them might finally settle down together and get married.” Peter responded, offering out information that the ex-lycanthrope would’ve been perfectly okay in not knowing. “Look, Moons, I’m going to get myself another drink at the bar, but I’ll see you around later, yeah?”
Remus nodded in reply before the shorter man left and shoved his way back into the crowd. He couldn’t help it when his gaze was soon gravitating back towards Sirius.
The Black man, who was still engaged in a passionate lip-lock with the blonde woman that was Marlene McKinnon, had his hands gripping her waist tightly. Dragging his eyes from the other man’s hands, he looked upwards and witnessed the two of them trying to eat each other’s faces off. Call him a prude, but it was rather unseemly in Remus’s own eyes, and a wave of uncontrollable disgust crashed over him.
Soon, Sirius and Marlene managed to pull themselves back from each other and, in that short time apart, the black-haired man flickered his eyes towards where Remus was. An emotion, something that he was unable to translate, echoed within them, but he didn’t have the ability to interpret it as their eyes persisted in their staring contest. Even when Sirius leaned back into the blonde woman’s mouth, his gaze stayed with Remus.
As Sirius’s mouth remained on the blonde woman in front of him, his grey eyes continued to peer straight back into Remus’s ones. Remus couldn’t avert his own gaze as he felt a horrid shiver trail down his spine. An ugly, bitter feeling reared its head within him – an envy that Remus couldn’t shake even as he gulped down the remainder of his drink, hoping that the action would swallow his emotions down with the cold liquid.
Even more worryingly, Remus found that the envy had twisted itself with a sick, lingering feeling of satisfaction at the fact that, even though Sirius was occupied by someone else, his attention was still on the ex-lycanthrope.
Now drink-less and alone with nothing but the thumping music to accompany his racing heart, he needed to escape immediately. Where could he find any sort of refuge when Sirius was looking at him whilst doing that? Perhaps the toilets would offer him some peace. Merlin, it would do him some fucking good especially since witnessing that kiss had made his body flush and thrum with anger. Just as he turned to walk away, he caught Sirius moving his lips from Marlene’s own ones to the woman’s skin, trailing open-mouthed kisses down her neck.
All whilst looking at him.
He snapped his head around quickly, turning his back to the Black man as he shakily made his way to the loos. Even when he managed to find shelter in the toilets, his face remained flushed and palms sweaty at what he had just witnessed. Remus couldn’t evade the images of Sirius that replayed in his head. His mind was whirring at one-hundred miles an hour – why had the Black man been looking at him with such intensity? Why had he continued to stare at him whilst he was engaged and doing that with Marlene?
Remus splashed himself with water from the club’s grimy sink, hoping that he would calm him down. Sure, it was not his best nor cleanest idea, but it was an action that was needed in such a desperate situation. The water cooled his face but the red blush that decorated it lingered.
“It’s nothing, don’t read into it. It doesn’t mean anything.” Remus couldn’t help but mumble to himself before he gained the courage to make his way back to the dance floor.
As he wandered through the throngs of people, he managed to stumble across James, who was making some extremely lively movements that could be classified as dance moves. Potentially. Remus ducked out of the way of a flayed elbow before tapping James and swiftly found himself pulled into a drunken, uncoordinated hug.
“Moony!” The Potter man shouted boisterously in his ear and Remus could smell the alcohol on his breath. “Where have you fucking been? I was expecting us to have a dance-off!”
“Haven’t been up to much, Prongs, to be honest. And I’ll agree to your proposition on one condition. If I win, you buy me drinks for the rest of the night. I’ll be more than willing to battle against you on that clause.” Remus managed to mischievously reply with a slight grin.
“Oh, you’re so not ready for all my bad-boy dance moves, mate.” James smirked as he dramatically stretched.
“Yeah, sure.” Remus’s voice was full of amused disbelief as he watched the other ‘prepare’ for their showdown. “What about you, hm? What have you been getting up to?”
“No, no, wait.” James paused with his arms stretched behind him, tilting his face forward and squinting at the ex-lycanthrope. “We are not talking about me when you’re blushing like that, Moons. Who’s made you all like this?”
“What?” Remus spluttered out at the drunk man’s words for surely the redness was invisible in the club lighting. “No one, honestly.”
His first lie of the night.
“Really? No one here has caught your eyes then?” James’s eyebrows wiggled suggestively, obviously not believing Remus’s words. “You sure about that? There’s plenty of fish in the sea.”
It was then that he realised that because he had been so focused on Sirius, he hadn’t had chance to look at any of the other club goers. In fact, such a thought hadn’t even crossed his mind.
“No one, mate.” He spoke, his words composing his second lie of the evening. “Just been trying to enjoy myself and have a couple of drinks.”
“Good for you! Oh, shit, this is such a bloody brilliant song-” James’s body starting violently convulsing into clumsy dancing once more at the club’s music but, this time, he pulled Remus along with him. “C’mon mate! Give it some whammy! The competition has officially started!”
The image of Sirius’s lips pressed against someone else preoccupied him as he tried to escape the weird thoughts that James’s words had ignited in his mind. Instead, he tried to join the Potter man’s horrendous dancing, forcing his body to fall into the pounding rhythm. Thankfully, James’s ridiculous movements distracted him and, as each song passed, he found himself relaxing more and more.
However, Remus made a fatal flaw. As he felt the music drum through his bones, he momentarily closed his eyes only for Sirius’s intense stare and his dazzling smile and his enticing lips to flash into his mind. Remus’s eyes flew open as his heartrate skyrocketed. And that was it, he could no longer flee from the images his brain had stored.
For the rest of the time he spent at the club, Remus found that the Black man’s mouth was the only thing that occupied his mind, no matter whether his eyes were open wide or not. It haunted him, with not even James’s silly dance contest being able to distract him. By the time the early hours of the morning arrived, he had replayed the images so much that he was sure he could imagine exactly how Sirius’s lips would’ve felt on his very own pair instead of Marlene’s.
In fact, if he focused hard enough on the flickering, fresh recollections of Sirius, Remus’s skin – the very same skin that had remained untouched for the entirety of the time he had spent in this alternate world – found itself tingling in anticipation. The anticipation was nothing, he thought. It was just a trivial, niggling feeling of worry since he hadn’t seen Sirius since the lip-locking incident.
The complete and utter occupation of Sirius’s lips in his mind certainly didn’t mean anything, right? Surely not, he compelled his brain to think. But even to himself, Remus Lupin, the master of repressing his own emotions, the words found themselves falling flat.
Even he couldn’t find it within himself to believe his third and final fib of the night.