Chapter 1
It was the first of September and Remus had just finished saying goodbye to his parents when a letter literally flew into his hands. Remus stared at the parchment that had just flown into his hands, then back at the idiot that had charmed it to do so, Sirius Orion Black, newly presented alpha, deluded, self-proclaimed Casanova, and full-time annoyance, stood a few feet away, waggling his eyebrows like this was some grand romantic gesture and not the most cursed thing Remus had ever read. The letter read as follows,
Dear Remus John Lupin (soon to be Black), I'm coming back for that ass
If I ain't get that butt last year, then this year it's getting smashed
I ain't pulling up in no granny costume that shit hard to run in
I'm pulling up in a tracksuit and we really gonna get this fun in"
“Explain,” Remus deadpanned, waving the letter at him.
Sirius gasped, clutching his chest like Remus had personally hexed him. “Remmy! Can’t you feel the poetry? The raw emotion? I spent hours composing this heartfelt declaration!”
“This is not poetry, Sirius. This is a crime, why would you even be in a granny costume? That makes no sense” Remus said, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Standing to the side, James had his face buried in his hands. “Sirius, I love you but you can’t write things like that.”
“Why not?” Sirius huffed, folding his arms. “I’m expressing my undying devotion. My alpha instincts demand that I—”
“You rhymed ‘run in’ with ‘fun in,’” Remus interrupted.
Sirius blinked. “And?”
Remus sighed deeply, reconsidering every life choice that had led him to this moment. It had been like this for years—Sirius, the bane of his existence, following him around like a particularly deranged puppy, determined to woo him through sheer persistence (and questionable poetry). He’d even snuck into the Ravenclaw common room to pester him there too, nowhere in Hogwarts was safe for Remus at this point
“Look, Black,” he said, stuffing the parchment into his pocket before anyone else could see the atrocity. “Whatever weird fantasy you have about me, let it go. There is no ‘us.’ There will never be an ‘us.’ I haven’t even presented yet, I could be an alpha or beta for all you know”
Sirius grinned, unbothered. “That’s fine, I know you’ll be an omega, I’m even willing to bet my entire Gringotts vault on it. And there’ll be an ‘us’ eventually, We can take our time. However long you need I'm willing to wait for you darling,” he added with a wink.
Remus groaned. “That’s not what I meant—”
“See you in the carriage, my love.” Sirius blew a kiss at him and strutted away like he hadn’t just verbally set Remus’s soul on fire.
James sighed. “At this point, just date him. I’m tired.”
“James, I know he’s your best mate and all but I’m getting tired of his infatuation,” Remus stated tiredly.
James threw an arm around Remus’s shoulders, grinning. “You might as well accept it, mate. The dog’s obsessed. You could vanish off the face of the earth, and he’d still sniff you out.”
“Like a bloodhound from hell,” Remus muttered, shoving James off.
“Besides, I don’t think it’s just an infatuation anymore Rem,” He answered while following Sirius onto the train.
Remus stood frozen on Platform 9¾, staring at their retreating figures with the sheer exhaustion of someone who had lived too long, despite only being fifteen.
“I hate them, Sirius, especially,” he muttered.
Peter, who had witnessed the entire thing while stuffing his face with chocolate frogs, shook his head. “That’s funny. You smell like you don’t.”
Remus turned to him, scandalized. “Shut up, Pete. I don’t smell like anything yet.”
He and Peter made their way onto the train, exchanging tidbits about their summers and as soon as they entered their compartment, Sirius was already sprawled across the seats, looking insufferably pleased with himself. “You’re late,” he said.
“I was not late,” Remus snapped, stuffing his and Peter's trunks into the overhead. “I was dealing with the emotional aftermath of your poem.”
“Love letter,” Sirius corrected.
“Threat,” Remus shot back.
Sirius sighed dreamily. “You’re so difficult. It’s why I love you.”
James, scooching over so one of them could sit next to him groaned. “For Merlin’s sake! Try playing hard to get. You’re giving me secondhand embarrassment.”
“Why would I play hard to get when I’m already hard to forget?” Sirius winked at Remus.
Peter choked on his chocolate frog. Remus looked around for something—anything—to throw.
“Sirius,” he said slowly, voice eerily calm. “Why now? Why is your obsession with me peaking this year?”
Sirius gasped dramatically. “It’s not an obsession. It’s destiny, Moony. This year, I have a plan.”
“Oh no,” James said immediately.
“Oh yes,” Sirius countered.
Remus narrowed his eyes. “What plan?”
Sirius leaned in, looking serious for once. “Listen. We’ve been best mates for years. We’ve been through thick and thin together. You are my most favoritest person in the world.”
“That’s not a word, and we haven’t been best mates for years, we’re just friends,” Remus muttered, but Sirius steamrolled over him.
“How can you say that Remmy, when you sit with us every train ride?”
“I only do that because all four of us promised to do so before we were even sorted”
“Anyway, this year, I'm taking initiative instead of waiting for fate to take its sweet time. I’m going to woo you, Remus Lupin, and prove that I’m the best alpha for you”
Remus stared at him. “You’re what?”
Peter made a strangled sound. James looked torn between horror and laughter.
Sirius nodded firmly. “I’m going to woo you. Court you. Sweep you off your feet.”
“You’re going to fail,” Remus said flatly.
Sirius grinned. “We’ll see.”
Remus sat back in his seat, rubbing his temples. “I can’t believe I have to live through this.”
Peter looked at James. “Five sickles says Remus caves by Christmas holidays.”
James scoffed. “Mate, I’m not taking that bet. He will.”
Remus groaned. “I hate all of you.”
Sirius winked again. “You say that, but just wait till you see my next plan.”
Remus buried his face in his hands. It was going to be a long year, and they hadn’t even left the station yet.