another night
“I think you should invite your dad back here. Just for dinner.”
Marvin had been going to therapy for two months now. Things with Whizzer felt better again. He was glad his dad had been gone for a while. It gave him the space he needed to really think things through.
“No. It’s better without him around, baby.”
Whizzer and Marvin were laying in bed. Whizzer, with his hand in Marvin’s hair and twirling it around, trying to get Marvin to sleep.
“Don’t you think it’s good to contact him again? Maybe rekindle the relationship. I think you’re getting more ready for it every day.”
Marvin huffed. “I might be ready, but I do not want to see him.”
Whizzer stopped his hand mid-way a swirl.
“I think you’re lying to yourself, dear. I think you should just call him.”
Marvin pulled away from Whizzer’s touch and turned his back to him.
“Baby?”
“Good night, Whizzer.”
Whizzer sighed and laid down fully and turned off his light. “Night.” He muttered back.
Whizzer’s breathing slowed after a while. But Marvin couldn’t even close his eyes. He didn’t want to sleep. If he did, he feared his parents would somehow show up in his mind again. God, he hated them. He really did. The way they just let him be raised by the various maids, ignoring him throughout his youth.
He had tried so hard to connect with them. To go to them and hold them and help them during fights. But then his mother disappeared for a while and his dad was barely home when that had happened. He sometimes wondered if they had died. But then he’d see his father’s coat again and Marvin started yelling harder. But other than the maids changing from time to time, his father gave no impression of him knowing of his son’s existence.
And nothing had helped. Just nothing-
He put his hand to his mouth, covering his eyes at the same time. He silenced his sobs. Jesus, he must look pathetic like this. He pulled his hand away and looked at the ceiling again. Soon, the tears stopped. He didn’t care. He sniffed and closed his eyes. Immediately, his therapist appeared in front of him.
“Open up to him. He loves you.” She said in his mind.
Marvin ignored the voice. He didn’t care about his parents. He just didn’t. So why would he bother Whizzer with his bullshit?
Marvin woke up in the middle of the night. He had a bad dream, so he stayed still for a moment. Then he got up and yawned. He rubbed his eyes and knocked on his parent's door. There was no answer. Marvin was cold. He wanted to feel warmer. So he went inside the bedroom but stayed near the door.
“Dad?” he whispered softly. “I had a nightmare.”
A grunt.
“Dad? Can I sleep with you and mom?”
“Go away, Marvin,” and his dad turned away.
Marvin’s eyes burned, as well did his face. He turned and left silently. How stupid was he to bother his father? It was embarrassing. He sniffed and went back to his room and closed the door. He kept the lights on and laid down. He tried to fall asleep, but it was hard. Would his dad think he was even more useless now? He should never have gone. He closed his eyes.
At least his dreams were nice when he fell asleep this time. He was being held by someone strong. Someone that loved him.
“Marvin?”
“Hm.”
“Baby, wake up. Trina is on the phone for you.”
Marvin opened his eyes. Whizzer was above him, smiling down at him gently. “Trina, love.”
Whizzer handed him the phone. Marvin sat up and Whizzer sat down behind him, holding him tightly.
“This is Marvin,” he said, clearing his throat.
“Marvin, you need to come here. Your mother showed up.”
Marvin frowned. “What?” he yawned.
“Your mother. She is looking for you. Come and get her.”
Marvin’s eyes widened. He was awake now.
“Trina, please don’t tell her we’re divorced- she doesn’t know, and I don’t want-”
Whizzer grip on him loosened slightly.
“Mendel opened the door.”
“Fuck.”
“Just come get her, okay? I don’t have time for this.” The line went dead.
“Whizzer- I… I have to go. I’m sorry.”
Marvin got up and threw on some random clothes that laid on the floor.
“Let me come?” Whizzer asked softly.
“No- not yet. I’m sorry.”
Whizzer huffed. “It’s fine. Just drive safe. I’ll have breakfast ready and I’ll be gone for the day, in case she wants to come here. Give you two some time.”
Marvin smiled. “Thanks, love.”
He kissed Whizzer quickly and got in the car. He rubbed his eyes and looked at the road ahead. He could do this. It was just his mother. He could handle his mother.
Surely.