The Idiot in his Unnatural Habitat

Terasaka's POV

When one has a boyfriend, a solid friend group and a van, he feels pretty freaking great. He feels even freaking better when two months of summer vacation is coming up. Oh man, was I ever ready for summer. No homework, no class, just me and my gang taking ass and making names. Wait, that's not right.... Anyways, it was gonna be awesome. Two whole months of no reading. I was ready.

I shot a look at my gang. Itona raised an eyebrow and gave me a thumbs up. Hazama rolled her eyes, but she did give me a small smile. Yoshida was slumped over his desk, looking dead. He gave me a smile that looked more like a grimace. He'd seemed kinda off lately. I'd push him in a lake or something to make him feel better.

The only one who didn't look back at me was Muramatsu. He was too busy making goo-goo eyes at Hara. Don't get me wrong, Hara's a sweet girl, but if Matsu was any sappier, he'd turn into a pile of Matsu-mush on the floor. I threw a piece of paper at him. It hit him on the head. Bullseye!

Matsu glared at me and threw the paper back, giving me the finger. I mimed where he could shove that finger, before looking back at the clock. Five more minutes. Five more minutes until-

"Terasaka!" the octopus called. I jumped out of my seat.

"YOU GOTTA BE FUCKIN' KIDDING ME!" I yelled. "YOU COULDN'T HAVE WAITED FIVE MINUTES SO I'D HAVE TIME TO RUN?!"

"I thought now would be a good time to discuss the, ah, thirty seven missing assignments you've totaled." the octopus said, gesturing outside of the classroom. I groaned and shot a helpless look at Itona, who looked like he was trying not to laugh.

"Terasaka, I admit I'm a little concerned." Koro sensei said once we were alone. "You just aren't showing the motivation you used to."

I wasn't listening. I was watching a moth flutter by. I like moths.

"You're the only one that can change your life." the octopus continued. "What's something you really want Terasaka?"

"Moth." I said, before zoning back in. "Uh, say that again?"

"What's something you really want?" Koro sensei asked patiently.

I thought about it. I kinda had everything I wanted. Friends, a van, Itona, I was pretty good. Before I could stop it, a rush of memories flooded wherever it is that memories are stored in.

"My sister." I said, suddenly. Crap, I'd broken my streak of not thinking about the little rugrat. God, how long had it been? My parents had taken her with them to better and brighter things. I, Terasaka the moron, was destined to stay.

"Well, I was thinking academically, but that works too." the octopus said. "The point is, you have to think about what you want and strive for it. What's changed in your life? Is there anything you can use to get to your goals that you couldn't before?"

Normally I'd say that it was illegal to think this close to summer, but I felt myself actually putting some brain power into this. And I even had an answer.

"I have friends now! I can amass a small army! And I have my driver's license now! I can go places!!!"

"Terasaka, I'm talking about school-" but he didn't get any farther than that. The bell rang, and I was free.

"YEAH!" I yelled. "Thanks for the idea." I patted the octopus's shoulder before sprinting towards the outside. On the way I dumped my bag in the trash.

"Terasaka, you're going to need that in two months." Hazama said drily.

"Oh. Right." I said, yanking it back out. Now it smelled like fish.

Once my gang had assembled under our tree, I revealed my master plan. "It's summer! And we're gonna go on a roadtrip!"

"Where to?" my loyal shrimp asked. He was flipping a little screw driver through his hands, probably looking for something to screw...that came out wrong.

"I dunno. I think it's far away." I said. "Good thing we have two months!"

"I'm sorry, you expect us to drop everything and go "somewhere far away" for two months with you?" Hazama asked.

"Yup!"

"Alright." she shrugged.

"Yoshi, you in?" I asked.

"Sure." he shrugged, not saying anything else. Yes, he was in desperate need of a lake-pushing.

"Matsu! My buddy, my ramen dealer!"

"I can't!" he whined. "Hara and I were going to hang out."

"Bring her with." I said. "The more the merrier!"

"May I come?" asked my phone.

"Of course. You're very important." I said, patting it. Wait. "RITSU!"

"Sorry! Did I scare you again?" she peeped.

"YES! But yeah, you can come too." I said. "Let's see, who else wants to come?"

"Are we seriously organizing this?" Itona asked.

"Yup." I said happily. "Hey Zama, how about we invite She Who Will Not be Named."

Hazama's face turned crimson. "NO! I mean, she probably won't want to go, I mean, um...I'll invite her, don't you dare do anything!"

"What's five plus three!" I yelled, before remembering I had fingers. "It's nine!"

"Eight." Itona said, putting one of my fingers down. "Good try though."

"We need more." I said, scanning around. "HEY NERD! WANNA GO ON A ROADTRIP?!" I yelled.

Takebayashi stopped like he'd been shocked. He slowly turned around to face me. "May I ask why?"

"Well, there may be some special cafes which may be of interest to classy gentlemen like ourselves." I said, raising my eyebrows. Come on nerd, use those braincells and get what I'm trying to say here...

Takebayashi adjusted his glasses. "I suppose you drive a hard bargain."

I grinned. "This is gonna be great. The Terasaka gang will travel the world!!

Itona's POV

Terasaka suggesting that we drop everything to go on a random road trip to god knows where isn't the weirdest thing that could happen. And here I was worrying that we might have a boring summer. I shouldn't have worried, nothing's ever a dull moment with Terasaka.

We were walking home now, just the two of us. Terasaka got in trouble last week for parking his van near the school since he didn't have an official parking pass or parking spot, something that he hasn't stopped complaining about. I don't mind the walking though. It's a lot more peaceful.

"We'd be home by now if we had my van." Terasaka grumbled. I called it.

"Shut up and enjoy nature." I said.

Terasaka looked around for a moment before turning back to me. "Ok, I'm done enjoying nature."

I rolled my eyes. "Idiot."

He grabbed me, pulling me against his chest before ruffling my hair. "I love you."

"I love you too." I said, trying to sound exasperated. "Hey, you wanna tell me why we're literally going to travel the country?"

"Oh." he released me. "Remember the sister I told you about?"

"The one you forbade me from mentioning?"

"That's the one! Anyways, I had a talk with the octopus about taking control of my fate, and I think that this is the best way to do it. I wanna try and see her again."

"So you're dragging a bunch of us with you."

"Bingo!" Terasaka said, perking back up. "I'm, ahem, maybe too nervous to go alone..."

"Hey, you're stuck with me remember." I said. "If you're going to get lost somewhere in Japan, then I'll be there with you."

"Thanks Ito. Really." Terasaka said. "Hey speaking of stuck, how are you feeling."

Without thinking I reached up and felt my head. "I don't know. Itchy?"

"Well that's better than psychotic killing episodes." Terasaka said. "But hey, if you ever start feeling sick you gotta promise me that you'll tell me. Then I'll break all road safety laws to get you to a hospital."

"Because they'd definitely know what was going on." I said, shaking my head. "But I promise."

"Good! No one's dying on my watch." Terasaka said, crossing his arms. "Oh god this is gonna be so fun." he was bouncing on his heels like a little kid.

"Oh god. Do I have to wear the fun hat?" I groaned. The fun hat is a neon colored party hat Terasaka insists on making me wear every time I'm grumpy. Which is a lot.

"I'm gonna get fun hats for everyone!" Terasaka crowed.

"Hazama is literally going to kill you."

"You're right. I'll have to get her a black edgy one. Or I could make Kura-...She who must not be named give it to her."

"Not a bad plan." I said, nodding.

Terasaka grinned. "I'm just full of em." he looked around. "Uhhh...I think we took a wrong turn."

Somehow we were in the middle of a forest I didn't previously remember existing. "Well then."

"Well then." Terasaka said, looking around some more, before turning back to me. "You got any signal flares?"

"Why the fuck would I have-"

"Shh!" Terasaka shushed me. "I think I can figure out our location based on my senses alone." He closed his eyes tight and stuck his hands out in front of him like a zombie, shuffling his way forward. "I think I got it!" he called, before slamming into a tree. A tree that made a metallic clunk.

"OW!" Terasaka yelled, opening his eyes. "Hey!" He said. "I found civilization!"

It was one of the telephone poles that lined their way up the mountain. We weren't very far off track at all, and somehow neither of us had noticed that. I guess I may be an idiot as well.

Terasaka cocked his head. "Do you hear ringing? I hear ringing." he placed his ear to the pole. "Hello?"

"Great, now you have a concussion. Come on." I said, taking him by the hand and leading him back towards the path.

"I've done it Itona. I saved us from nature."

"Yes you did, good job."

"This road trip is gonna be awesome." He said wistfully, looking back at me. "Mainly cause I got you."

Hazama's POV

I was able to get packed within a matter of seconds. When all one owns is black clothing, matching outfits isn't a concern. Why was I going along with this moronic travel plan? Why not. If it wasn't for the gang, I'd probably never go outside, or even speak. They're my people, and I stick with them, even if we're probably going to get arrested on this trip for something dumb. Oh well, prison will make my autobiography sound cooler.

I snatched my phone off my bed, checking it for what felt like the six trillionth time. There it was. One unread notification. I knew exactly who it was from, and most likely what it would say. After all this time of trying to become cold and unfeeling, my stomach continued to flutter every time I thought about the outcome of that text.

Ok, time to get the inevitable disappointment over with. I unlocked my phone and opened my texts, closing my eyes. When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was the text that I myself had sent earlier.

"Hey, I don't know if you already have plans, but if you don't, me and some friends are going on a road trip. Would you want to come?" And then, just below that...My heart dropped into my chest.

"Hey Hazama! Sure!! I'd love to!!! Mind sending me some more details tho? I promise I wanna go!! <3 :) :D :P"

This girl had sent me three emojis and a heart. All of my cold and unfeeling training melted. I was all ready to sit around and be depressed too, after she said no. But she didn't say no...

Holy shit this was happening.

My elation was replaced by anxiety. This was Terasaka, of course we didn't have any other details. We didn't even know where we were going. I quickly dialed Terasaka, resolving to repeatedly call until he answered. Thankfully, it didn't come to that. He picked up on the first attempt.

"Terasaka!"

"Let a man pee in peace!" Terasaka yelled.

"Are you...in the bathroom?"

"Yeah! Jesus, so rude."

"Why did you pick up the call then!?"

"I...don't know." he seemed to be thinking. "Can I get back to you in a sec?"

"Yeah." I said, rolling my eyes. Only Terasaka would interrupt my love life for a bathroom break. Thankfully, he actually did get back to me quickly.

"Hey, it's Terasaka!"

"I know. I'm the one who called you."

"You never do that...Oh my god she said yes."

"She said yes!" I yelled, unable to contain my excitement any longer.

"Hell yeah!" Terasaka said. "Hey Itona, she said yes!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I heard Itona said. Even that made me smile. God, what was this? I felt so happy.

"Never mind, I'll catch you up later." Terasaka called. "So, we celebrating?"

"I need details first." I said. "Come on, at least give me something that faintly resembles a well thought out plan."

"Uh...we can meet at...eight thirty at the main campus parking lot." Terasaka said, surprising me.

"That's...a good idea." I said, surprised by the higher braincell functions.

"Hey, this is important." Terasaka said. "I got your back."

"Well in that case I'm screwed." I said, rolling my eyes.

"Shaddup. I'm gonna order you a mariachi band or something."

"Terasaka I will kill you."

Somehow, the two of us pulled together a semi decent plan which I sent back to Kurahashi. This was actually happening. This was actually friggen' happening. I was going to hang out with Kurahashi.

I mean, I had no idea where we were going, and I hate surprises, but just this once, I think I'll be ok with it.

Muramatsu's POV

"I love you more!" I said, making a heart with my hands.

"No, I love you more." Hara responded, making the same heart.

"No, I love you mo-"

"Ughhhh, hang up already." Yoshida groaned. He was sprawled across my bed. "I'm gonna be sick.

"Ok, I gotta go." I said. "I have a grumpy third wheel over here."

"Fuck you too!"

"I'll see you tomorrow!" I said. "I love y-" Yoshida had gotten up just in time to slam my laptop closed. "Hey!"

"Yeah yeah, she loves you too. Whatever." he crossed his arms. "I hope you had me over for a decent reason other then making me listen to that shit."

Honestly, his tone surprised me. Yoshida had been grumpy and tense for a couple of weeks now. We'd originally said that he was on his man period, and laughed it off, but this was getting a little extreme. "It's friday the seventh."

I saw his eyes widen with recognition. "You remembered."

"Of course I did. I'm not as dumb as Terasaka." Ever since we were in elementary school, Yoshida and I have carried forward our tradition of making a massive helping of pasta decorated with marshmallows. I can't exactly remember how it started, but every friday the seventh, and hell, every seventh, we recreate our diabetes inducing creation.

"Even though we're apparently fleeing the country tomorrow?" Yoshida said. He was starting to look more like his old self.

"Wait, we're leaving the country?" I said. "I have a travel guide somewhere!"

"God, you're so lame." Yoshida said, rolling his eyes.

I gave him the finger. "Fuck off. Anyways, you're gonna help me pack later. Deal?"

"I'm gonna have to sleep over, aren't I." It wasn't a question. Yoshida knew the drill by now. We'd always been especially tight. I loved everyone in my gang to death, not that I'd tell them that, but Yoshida had always been my best friend.

"Yup. Don't worry. The couch is still made up and everything." I said, checking my laptop screen to make sure it hadn't cracked.

"You're lame and you're a mom friend." Yoshida said.

"I wear my title with pride."

After consuming an ungodly amount of pasta topped with marshmallows, the two of us played some Mario Bros while we waited to see if we would explode or not.

"We need to stop making that much pasta." I groaned, accidentally walking straight into a mushroom.

"Are you kidding me? That was pathetic." Yoshida said, killing the mushroom that killed me. "And what are you talking about? It's food for the soul."

"Speaking of soul." I said, guiding my character in its bubble over to his. "Free mine."

"Nope. You're in a time out. For dying in a dumb way."

"And you think I'm the mom friend!" I yelled, whacking him with my controller. And then I remembered. My own mother had asked me to get the mail. "Shit, I gotta get the mail."

"It's eleven pm." Yoshida said, not looking up from the game.

"I forgot ok!" I yelled. "Don't start the boss battle without me."

"People in timeouts can't battle bosses." Yoshida said, still not looking at me.

"Fuck you too!" I said, stomping out of the door. It was decently warm out, and I hadn't bothered to put shoes on. Hopefully there wasn't a deadly reptile waiting to step on me. Yeah, those are the things I worry about.

I stuck my hand into the mailbox, yanking out a slightly larger load than usual. The reason why was quickly made clear. There was a package with my name on it.

Oh my god. This was it. Over three months ago I had applied for a famous cooking school down in Kyoto, and that right there, was their logo. They wouldn't bother sending a package if I was rejected...I was gonna be the next Gordon Ramsey!

I did a little dance before remembering I have neighbors and darting back inside. I slammed the door a little harder then I meant to. My excitement was taking over my body.

"Took you long enough." I heard Yoshida call. "You good?"

"Yeah." I said, feeling myself smile. "I'm great."

Yoshida's POV

Whatever detergent Matsu uses on the sheets is heavenly.

Seriously, I'm telling you, they smell amazing. I know they're clean too, which is surprisingly comforting. Jesus, is this my life now? Being a sheet connoisseur? I don't know how I feel about that.

Honestly, I don't know how I feel about anything anymore. My friends have said I'm "moody" and "irritable". I guess they're right, but I don't really care. I guess don't really care about anything anymore.

That thought in itself should be scary, but honestly, it's not. I could care less. I don't know when this started exactly, but I do know why. And I only have myself to blame for it.

I roll over, not willing to be a mushy mess again tonight. There's gotta be a bright side somewhere, right? I guess I'm going on a roadtrip tomorrow. Maybe that'll help, at least give me some noise to drown the numbness in.

God I hate this. I hate feeling like this. It's like all the enjoyment's gone out of my life. Even working on bikes doesn't give me the same thrill. One minute I was working, and the next I was sitting there, wrench in hand, realizing that I wasn't enjoying myself whatsoever.

Fantastic, here I am again, just thinking about it. Maybe a vacation is what I need or something. Yeah, it'll go better when I'm out of normal life for a bit. For some reason, I started thinking about Itona and Hazama. They kinda radiate edginess. It's nothing against them, I love hanging out with both of them, but they just seem to exist in a constant state of edgy. It's just normal for them, and everyone just accepts it.

Well, at least they did. Things are looking up for them I guess. Both either in a relationship or with a decent chance of getting in one. Matsu too. Hell, even Terasaka isn't single by some cosmic fuckup. They're all moving forward in life, going places, being happy.

So where does that leave me, huh? I wouldn't trade what happened this year for anything. The amazing things I've gotten to do and see, the people I've gotten to meet, all of that has been amazing, but even so...I guess I miss the old days when it was just the four of us dicking around and being assholes.

Did it all start with Itona? I think so. Ever since Terasaka's first one on one encounter with him, things started to change. At first things got better, but then everything started going too fast. Honestly, I thought Itona had a thing for Terasaka before either of them said anything. The way he looked at Terasaka, like he was the most incredible thing to walk the earth. No matter what he said, I knew.

But Terasaka feeling the same, that threw me for a loop. I'm happy for them, I really am, they both deserve it. But that changed everything. Terasaka got on his weird self improvement trend, and everyone else followed suit. Matsu got a girlfriend, Hazama started gunning for her sunshiny girl crush, and the gang just...changed. Four became five with Itona, and then six with Ritsu. She always kinda hung around before, but soon it became clear that she preferred our gang.

They were both transfer students, it was fine. They were just adding on to what was already there, not disrupting the balance. But then six became seven with Hara, and eight with Takebayashi. Yeah, the nerd actually started hanging with us on a normal basis. It just feels...wrong somehow. How someone we always used to pick on just rides with us now. And Hara, we've known each other longer than I've known anyone in the gang. I should be cool with it, right?

But I'm not. Does that make me a prick? Guess our numbers are increasing to nine. Terasaka told me that Kurahashi is coming along too, which is fantastic, just fan-freaking-tastic. I guess I am a prick, because I guess I don't want to share my friend group with five fucking imposters!

The second I think that, I feel guilty. Itona's been a good friend to me as any of the others, and again, I've known Hara since forever. Ritsu and Kurahashi are nothing but sweet and nice, and Takebayashi is actually kinda cool. They complete the group, I know it, I can feel it. It just feels so full.

And is there any room left for me? We fit so well together, just the four of us. But then others fit well too, and to fit, they had to squish me a little, until I don't fit as nicely anymore. Like that puzzle piece my dog chewed on. It still fits in the puzzle, but it just doesn't fir right.

Am I crazy for thinking that? It's almost one am, and I'm having a full on emotional monologue session on my friend's couch. This isn't something a normal person does...probably? Anyways, fuck that, no more feelings. Tomorrow I'm gonna scream and yell and laugh with everyone, and blare my mixtapes and drive and have so much fucking fun that I'll blow these feelings out of the water.

That's who I am after all. The fun one, the daredevil, the cool one. I mean, I was. I don't know what I am now. The odd one out?

Dammit, the return of the feelings, the feelings strike back. It's too quiet here. I usually spend my nights blasting my eardrums with anything that makes it too loud to think. I didn't bring my headphones though, and I have a feeling Matsu would actually kill me if I tried to play anything now.

Is it weird I want chloroform? I just want to sleep, stop being a sad sack. Maybe I should ask if Takebayashi has any. That sounds like something he would have...

I smacked myself in the face with my pillow. This was it for real this time, no more moping. If the others knew I was laying here on Matsu's couch being a wuss, they'd laugh at me. I was gonna have fun if it killed me, and knowing Terasaka's driving skills, it might.

Somehow I finally managed to fall asleep, and had one of those weird memory dreams. It was the day the four of us went to a lake to attempt to fish, despite having no fishing gear. The entire trip was basically us sitting around on a bench, poking sticks into the water and being surprised when we didn't get any bites. It was perfect, and then suddenly Itona was there, then Ritsu, then Hara, and then everyone else who had joined recently. They kept moving onto the bench and I slid closer and closer to the end, until only half of my ass was on the bench.

But they kept coming, and soon I was on the ground. There wasn't enough room on the bench. There wasn't a place for me.

Looking back, that's gotta be one of the most depressing things to ever emerge from my skull. I should write an edgy song about it, then play it at max volume. That'll help. Probably.