Please come back to me

Supergirl (TV 2015)
F/F
G
Please come back to me
Summary
Lena confronts Kara about knowing her secret identity. At home, Kara reevaluates her life and wonders if her existence is really necessary in the world.
Note
This may contain hints of suicide intentions, nothing explicit but still, careful if it triggers any of you. I love you, you're fckin awesome, stay safe.Any form of criticism is appreciated.
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Chapter 5

Alex was worried for her sister. 

In fact, she had been worried since Kara appeared at her doorstep looking for a safe place. Alex had done everything in her power to comfort her, but even with her best efforts she didn’t succeed in cheering her little sister up, and she felt a bit disappointed with herself.  

Learning, thanks to vague answers, that the main reason of Kara’s sadness was Lena Luthor had left her with a bitter taste in her mouth; she had grown fond of the genius woman with time and a lot of patience, and if there was a rift between the two she didn’t want to choose sides. Nonetheless, Kara was her sister, and no matter how close she and Lena had become, she would always be by her sister’s side. When Kara left she didn’t even finish her ice cream, and if Kara showing up at all wasn’t bad enough, this definitely was. Kara never, ever, left food unfinished. To her, food was something sacred that shouldn’t be left to waste, even if it was simple as an ice cream, and the fact that she barely touched the carton of rocky road (Kara’s favorite) at all was a sign that something was very, very wrong.

 She tried texting Lena that day, several hours after Kara left her apartment, to see if she could provide an explanation as to why Kara showed up at her home at 4 sharp in the early morning, but Lena wouldn’t return her texts. Alex even tried calling her a few times too, but the phone sent her directly to voicemail. Even though she insisted for some time, the result was the same. It was clear Lena would not answer anytime soon.  Perhaps she believed Alex would be mad at her or something of the sort, but in reality Alex was just concerned.

Then the next day at the DEO, she was met with particularly busy personnel. Apparently some bastard had put many small bombs all over National City. They weren’t that dangerous, but sure they were problematic.  Finding and deactivating them was a tedious and time consuming task that took a good part of the morning, but she was thankful that not a single one of them was near enough to people to cause a disastrous accident.  Whoever decided to put them had no intention of hurting anyone, merely wanting to mess around, or so it seemed. Alex tried having Supergirl find the bombs with her x-ray vision, but after an hour or so of searching it turned out that she couldn’t locate them, not all of them at least. The tiny things were made of some weird material that made them really hard to detect, she had said. 

 With her hands full trying to keep everything under control at the base and being worried for Kara, Alex was getting irritated, and not only because the damned bombs didn’t have a pattern for exploding, but because she couldn’t find the time to properly speak with her sister. She had tried her best to give Kara space and not pressuring her, but still needed to know what exactly happened. Even though she promised herself she would wait until Kara was ready to talk, she was getting impatient. There was the burning question in the back of her mind; would she have a reason to punch the pearly teeth out of Lena? She didn’t want to, but if she had hurt her sister there would be no other options. She only saw Kara for brief moments, when she came into the building for updates, and she seemed normal, extremely normal and happy… which would have been great, except for the fact that Kara somehow had suddenly stopped being all depressive and gloomy, almost as if nothing had happened at all. At first Alex was convinced that whatever their problem was had been resolved and Lena’s teeth would be safe from her wrath, but when she brought it up and Kara stiffened, changing the subject and fleeing using patrolling the area as an excuse, Alex realized that they hadn’t fixed shit.  Alex even considered going to L-Corp herself in search of answers, but dismissed the idea as soon as it crossed her mind.  If she did, there was a chance that she would make things worse instead of better.

Alex took notice of how Kara looked more and more tired each time she landed on the DEO’s balcony, which was odd, as she was a super powered hero.  Maybe it was emotional exhaustion, perhaps the thing with Lena was taking its toll on Kara’s shoulders and that’s why her sister looked exhausted. It was a possibility, and Alex didn’t know what else to do to help than handing Kara sugary treats or candy to cheer her up every time they passed each other.  It seemed to work for a while, before Kara's smiles turned sad when receiving the snacks from her sister, every time softly saying "Thanks Al, i love you…" before walking away. 

Alex was worried sick, to say the least, but she had to keep focused on her job and couldn't afford to get distracted. Despite Supergirl not finding all of the exploding threats, she did help a lot diminishing their number to the point that only one or two would go off every hour, and she was still with her eye open to any hint that could tell where the others (if there were others left, that is) might be. Thanks to all that work, the agents at the DEO could finally take a break, and with that, Alex was able to grab lunch with Kara.  Alex knew how much Kara had worked and let her decide where they’d eat. Of course the place she chose was the Chinese restaurant nearby, any other place was out of the question. Nothing could get between Kara and her favorite food; potstickers. As soon as the owner saw them, his face lighted up. The Danvers sisters were his #1 clients (well, mostly Kara, but Alex liked the place too) and he was more than happy to serve them. The tired women took their seats and signaled the man that they would take the usual. He knew their order by heart now.

“You look terrible.” Said Alex, she didn’t bother to sugarcoat it. She hated to see her sister like that, and being blunt was not one of her worries.

Kara, for her part, reclined back in her seat, taking a sip from the club soda one of the waiters put in the table as soon as they sat. “Yeah, but honestly, i’m fine Al.” She looked to the side as she spoke and Alex knew she was lying. She always knew when her sister wasn’t telling her the truth, the little quirks would tell her everything. She thought for a second to call her out on it, but decided to let it slide. 

"Did you sleep last night?"

"I did…" 

"I meant the whole eight hours. Did you?" Alex raised an eyebrow and took a sip from the beer the waiter had placed along with the club soda.

Kara stared at the table, as if by doing it hard enough she could summon the food. "Yeah, i slept like a baby."

Of course Alex was skeptical. She had thought about leaving the issue with Lena and her sister between them and just focusing on being there to support her sister, but if whatever happened was making Kara behave this weirdly, of course she would try to dig out the truth.

Alex waited a bit before speaking, “So, have you talked to Lena?” maybe she could get Kara to spill something by casually asking. “I called her yesterday and sometime earlier to ask her for help with some tech back at the DEO, but she didn’t answer. I was wondering if you could let her know.” Of course it was not true, not all of it at least, but Alex had to find a way to bring out the subject. Surely a white lie wouldn’t hurt.

Their orders arrived and Kara looked almost relieved to have something to distract herself with. The waiter was struggling to maneuver with the massive amount of food, but he managed to neatly arrange everything on the table.

 Kara didn’t waste a second and started digging. “This is really good!” she said with her mouth full.  Alex’s eyes narrowed. She knew her sister was very passionate about food, but this was obviously an attempt to avoid answering the question.  Good thing this was a game for two. Alex started eating too, slowly, her eyes never leaving Kara. She knew that under the scrutiny of her piercing gaze Kara sooner or later would drop her charade.

It worked.  After a few moments Kara lost the battle and lowered her chopsticks. She sighed, defeated.  “I… I haven’t really had the chance to talk to her. You more than anyone should know that i’ve been busy today.”  Kara thought for a second. “Why didn’t you ask Brainy to help you?”

Alex smirked internally, proud of the effectiveness of her intimidating glare. “He requested the day off, and since it wasn’t an emergency i didn’t want to bother him." Maybe her strategy was not going to work after all.  Perhaps she should actually call Brainy and ask for options. "But yeah, you’re right, sorry.” She took another sip from the cold beer. Alex really wanted to help Kara, but frustrating as it was, there was nothing she could do if her sister didn’t open up to her. “You do look tired, though. Going up and down all morning probably took a lot from you. With your duty at the DEO and your work at CatCo, even for an alien, that’s too much. You need a break every now and then too, Kar.”  

Kara slightly grimaced, it was subtle but Alex noticed. “I promise i’ll rest tomorrow…” She smiled, but it looked forced. She kept eating her food, but lacking the eagerness she always had in her eyes. It was unsettling.

They kept eating for a while in silence, but not the comfortable one Alex was used to. 

“Speaking of CatCo, how is it going? Do you have your next Pulitzer winning article?” There was pride in Alex’s voice. Having her sister being nominated to a Pulitzer was one very important thing, because Kara had achieved that with her own effort. 

Kara had a tight smile adorning her face, and she seemed to suddenly find the door very interesting. “Something like that…”

“Oh, so are you in the middle of a case? All morning you’ve been distracted.”

Kara’s eyes darted to see Alex, who was popping a potsticker in her mouth.  She seemed to think a bit before speaking. “I uh, yeah, it’s important, about people safety, I’ve been working on it since yesterday. But heeey, you know what?” Kara started gathering her stuff in her bag and stood up, leaving her part of the bill on the table. “I have to go and, uh… find some leads? I have to interview someone—A man! Yeah, this guy that knows something and… you want to do a sisters night tonight?”

Alex was taken aback by Kara’s sudden rambling, not because she wasn’t used to them, but because it was so unexpected and… suspicious.  

“I’d love to, sis, but I can’t. I promised Kelly we’d go out today.” Alex said, standing up herself and giving Kara a tight hug. “Rain check though?” She held her by the shoulders. Kara semblance fell for a second but tried to hide it, and Alex felt a pang of guilt in her chest. “Hey…” she cooed, “We still can always hang out tomorrow, no? Don’t be sad, if you need me i’m only a call away, okay? “

Kara smiled softly and hugged her sister. “I know, Alex.  I love you, remember that, okay?” She said before quickly turning around and leaving. Alex’s sister sixth sense tingled, warning her that something was wrong, but she couldn’t decipher what. She watched Kara go through the glass window.

//

Alex was tired. The date with Kelly had gone great, and she was happy to see her happy.  But she couldn’t stop worrying about Kara.  It was late in the evening, and she was wondering if Kara was still awake and ready for a last hour sisters night. At this point it was more to see her, even if just for a bit, to get rid of the nagging feeling than anything. She felt bad for declining Kara’s invitation in the first place, especially since they hadn’t spend time together lately, but she had planned that date with Kelly for a few days and couldn't just cancel it.

The night was slightly cold, but being covered by her leather jacket, it was nice. Whilst walking towards her sister place Alex was pensive, something about the way Kara had spoken to her was bugging her. Normally Kara would not remind her every five seconds how much she loved her, like she'd done all day. Maybe it was just Alex’s imagination. Or wasn’t? She couldn’t get rid of the thorn and sped up the pace. 

Alex arrived at Kara's building and found herself going up the stairs. In her way up she was met with an old lady, who approached her.

"Excuse me miss, have you seen a dog around here? I accidently left the door open and my little baby ran outside." The old woman looked worried, and Alex felt pity for her.

"Uh, sorry ma’am, i haven’t seen your dog. I actually just arrived here, but I can help you find your dog if you want."

"No, no, it's fine darling. I'll find him on my own, he couldn't have gone far. Thanks anyway." The lady kept walking her way, and so did Alex, until the woman suddenly stopped and turned around, calling out to Alex.

"You're Kara's sister, right? Are you here to return your key?"

Alex was confused, and at the same time the feeling of dread crawled up her back. "What? What are you talking about?"

"The landlord replaced the lock today, sweetheart, you don’t have to return the key. It's a shame though, i really liked your sister.”

Alex didn't wait for further explanation and darted to Kara's door, only to furiously insert the key into the keyhole. She grew desperate, as the key wouldn't turn.

"Kara! Kara are you there? Open the door!"

There wasn’t any sound coming from the other side of the door, and the damn key still wasn’t turning. Alex started banging on the door, not caring anything at the moment aside of her sister being alright.

"Kara! It's Alex, open the door!"

Alex was getting scared, she felt a knot on her stomach and the feeling of dread overcame her. She took a step back and with a hard kick she brought the door down and entered the dark apartment. The first thing she noticed was that the sounds of her boots against the floor was causing way too much echo. She reached for the light switch, guiding herself by feeling the wall until she found it and turned on the lights.. 

It was empty…

The whole apartment was empty.

Alex couldn’t believe her eyes. There was no trace of Kara, and no trace her furniture at all. 

It couldn't be right, it must be some sort of  illusion or something of the sort. There was nothing there!

Alex searched everywere but found nothing.

"Excuse me miss, you shouldn’t be here." Said a voice behind her, sounding irritated. It was a middle aged man, whose face had a permament frown on it. He was looking directly at her, then his gaze swept the whole space for anything wrong until his eyes spotted the door laying on the floor. "What the—" he didn’t finish the sentence as Alex grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, lifting him a few inches off the ground. 

“What happened here? Where is my sister?!”

The man was scared enough for the color to leave his face. He couldn't do more than stutter the answer.

“Miss— Miss Danvers cancelled he— her contract." He closed his eyes, silently regretting his life choices. "This place has be— been empty since this morning… please don't hurt me!"

Alex let the man go, quickly pulling out her phone and dialing the first number on the list.

"Please answer this time…"

On the other side of the city, a phone ringed a few times, before a pale hand grabbed it and pressed the answer button without even looking who the caller was.

“Hello…?” the voice sounded so fragile.

“Lena? Thank god! I— i don’t know what to do! I came to her apartment and there's nothing here!  She's gone!” Alex was struggling to keep her cool while she waited for an answer. "Lena? Wha—"

Alex's voice sounded distant to Lena, and she didn’t need to hear a name to know who Alex was talking about. The agent was oblivious to what Lena's trembling hand was holding.

A letter.

“Alex…I know what happened to Kara…”





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