The Nightmare

It had been a week since you had to kill Crossbones and the only friend you had when you were in the army. You hadn’t completely gotten over the image of your old friend trying to make a deal so he wouldn't die. That image haunted you every time you closed your eyes. Bucky had been forcing you to eat and helped you through this rough patch. The two of you had just got to his room after a checkup at a doctor's office, he was healed and better. Every night you made it your mission to try and sleep, every night you failed. Your nights were filled with tossing, turning, staring at the ceiling, and staring at your sleeping husband with his hair covering part of his face. He always looked peaceful when he was around you. When you were around the others you always acted like everything was fine but when you were alone with your husband you couldn’t help but cry and cling to him as he comforted you.

Another week had passed and you were eating on your own again but not very much. You used to be able to eat two pizzas by yourself. You only knew this because Thor wanted to see who could eat more. You beat him by one slice. Now you couldn’t eat a single slice without feeling sick and wanting to throw up.

Bucky had just gotten out of the shower and laid down next to you with his arm around your waist. “Come on babe get up and get some clothes on were going out with Clint and Nat to the movies.”

“You can go I just want to stay here and watch shitty horror movies all night Bucky.”

“Tough you're leaving the Tower whether you like it or not.” He got up and stood you on your feet.

You flopped back down on the bed. “Nah I’m good.”

“If you don’t get dressed I’ll…. I’ll”

“You’ll what? Do nothing.” you smirked. He noticed and pinned you to the bed. You knew escape was impossible with him but you still tried to fight him.

“I’ll make you get dressed and go out with your friends.” You were still struggling when he suddenly kissed you hard. You finally gave up and kissed back.

After several minutes he finally stopped and allowed you to say “Alright fine.” He let you go and you got up to get dressed. When you were taking off your sweat pants he noticed something on your thighs. There were tiny cuts on your thighs and he knew exactly where they came from. With one swift move he picked you up and looked you dead in the eye.

“I love you and you’re perfect, you can tell me if you're depressed or sad. I’m your husband not just some silly phase. Hopefully what happened to your legs is though. Please don’t anymore I love you and you did what you had to do.” with that he began to kiss every singly little cut on your legs. He carefully sat you back down and let you finish getting dressed in complete silence.

After getting dressed and meeting your friends downstairs, the four of you got into a car and went to go see War Dogs. As predicted Bucky had to drag you everywhere and had to bribe you with kisses. At least half way through the movie the two of you were kissing. Clint and Nat, who were sitting next to the two of you, shook their heads and tried to enjoy the rest of the movie. The two of you stopped here and there to see what was happening on the screen, but quickly went back to making out. As soon as the movie was over Clint sat up and said “Finally! Calm it down you two.”

The four of you left the theater and got back into the car after Clint had to get a full refill on popcorn. He and Nat had it in the front seat with them but Bucky kept reaching up to steal handfuls for him and you in the back. He was glad you were eating some popcorn.

When all of you returned to the tower it was late and nearly everyone was asleep. Nat and Clint went to their room and Bucky and you went to yours. “Hey I’m going to go take a shower I’ll be back in like ten minutes babe.”

“Alright as long as I don’t have to help you shower and stuff. But I will gladly help you get undressed.” A grin ever so slowly crawled across his face as he slip his hands under your shirt.

“Babe, no not now I’m not in the mood” you pushed his hands away. “Maybe tomorrow night.”

“But babe I’m in the mood. And I thought you wanted a baby, to make babies we have sex and so on. Don’t you still want a baby?”

“I- I don’t know Bucky. I don’t think I would be a good mom, what if I kill them on accident. What if I hurt them. Bucky I don’t if I can do this anymore. I don’t want to hurt them or you.”

“Hey hey hey you would make a great mother, you would never hurt them baby, and you would never hurt me.” Both of you looked at each other. ”I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, you’re perfect in every way and I’m so lucky that I’m the man you married and want to start a family with.” he kissed all over your face. “I love you.” With this he grabbed both your cheeks and pulled you in for a kiss which you returned. You felt his hands tugging the bottom of your shirt up and you decided not to fight him this time. After he quickly removed your shirt you pulled off his. He removed your bra and pushed you back into the bed so he could start kissing your chest. He removed his pants and underwear while still mapping your chest and now your stomach. “There’s about to be a baby growing in there and they’re gonna be beautiful just like their mother.”

“You mean handsome like you.”

“I mean like you.” he kissed you and ran his hand up and down the side of your body. “God I missed seeing you like this.” your hands went for his hair as you moaned quietly as he entered you. He started out torturously slow. A smirk plastered on his face as he saw you squirm beneath him. Small moans poured out of your mouth as he kissed along your chest and neck with the same speed as his thrusts.

“Babe! This is torture please, pleaaase give me more.”

“But you're not in the mood remember.”

“Bucky please. I need you” he cut you off with a kiss and slowly thrusted faster and harder. Once he pulled away for air he began to move faster and rougher. Moans poured out of both of your mouths. You could feel your arms losing their strength so you slid them down his back. His hair quickly fell in his face. His moans got louder and so did yours. He began to suck on your neck leaving a giant hickey in that area. You could feel your peak creeping up. He began to thrust rougher and rougher causing you to moan louder and louder. Bucky’s metal hand continued to run up and down the side of your body as the other held him up just inches above you. The cold metal of his hand against your hot sweaty body made your climax come even faster. After minutes of thrusts your climax hit you hard and left you paralyzed clinging to Bucky. His came shortly after yours. He slowly pulled out and kissed you deeply while laying down and pulling you on top of him. “We made a huge mess didn’t we?”

“I would think it’s safe to say not that big of a mess but still a tiny bit. Easily cleanable.” the two of you stayed like that the rest of the night. You woke up alone in bed with the blanket over you. You slowly got up and wrapped up in a towel and went to go shower.

After your shower you got dressed in black oversized baggy sweats that clung to your hips and a red fitted tank top with your hair in a messy bun on the top of your head. You walked into the training room and were met with Nat and Bucky sparing together. You sat next to Clint, who still had the giant bucket of popcorn, and waited. “Did you and Bucky have fun last night?” You looked at Clint and he had a huge grin on his face. “We’re right down the hall from you guys, we heard you i mean it wasn’t very hard to put together either. You’re in a better mood and so is Buck plus there is a giant ass hickey on your neck.” He ate another clump of popcorn.

“Well shit.” A few minutes later Nat had Bucky pinned against the mat. He quickly got out of it and had her pinned down to where she couldn’t escape. They both walked over. Nat was in her typical training uniform, leggings and a tank top similar to yours. Bucky in almost matching sweat pants as you and a tight short sleeve shirt.

“Hey there sexy, how did you sleep?” Bucky said as he reached for a handful of popcorn.

“I slept beautifully thank you for asking Buck, I always knew you secretly cared about me.” Clint said as he stuffed more popcorn in his mouth.

“I was talking to Y/N, dipshit.” he held out a hand to help you stand back up. “Let’s get you to the kitchen so you can eat something babe.”

Clint couldn’t help himself, “Nah I’m good I got some popcorn.”

Bucky slapped him in the back of the head and held your hand taking you into the kitchen only to be greeted with a burning smell. Standing in front of the stove was Steve and Tony in matching aprons covered in flour. “Hi Y/N!” Steve sounded like an excited puppy.

“We tried to make you waffles to try and cheer you up some but I think we burnt them.” Tony tried to sound as casual as possible but failed. All of a sudden Coulson hauled ass into the kitchen with a fire extinguisher.

“Why do I smell something burning?!” Coulson was looking around in a panic trying to find what was on fire. He saw Steve and Tony standing there in aprons. “Oh you two are just cooking.” With that he just walked away.

“Great parenting.” Tony commented. “He didn’t even notice there really is a fire in the oven right now.”

“Wait what’s in the oven right now?!” Bucky nearly screamed.

Steve and Tony looked to the oven. “Oh right,” Steve said. “Don’t open the oven.”

Coulson was immediately back in the kitchen. This time he had his sunglasses and two fire extinguishers. “Alright. Open the oven.”

“Y/N maybe we should go in the living room.” Bucky suggested.

“Yeah that’s probably smart.” You and Bucky quickly evacuated into the living room. He jumped on the long couch and you climbed next to him. He wrapped his arms around you tightly and grabbed the remote so you guys could watch tv until the kitchen was safe again. You found yourself wanting to fall asleep again despite just waking up. Anytime you were in Bucky’s massively muscular arms you felt safe and like you could sleep and not worry about a single thing. You tried to stay awake but Bucky’s arms were far too overpowering. You gave up and closed your eyes to hopefully get some more sleep.

About an hour had passed when you woke up to the smell of fresh pancakes. You sat up and looked around to see your husband and a God towering over the stove making pancakes while Steve and Tony watched crouching hidden behind the island. Thor glanced over and saw you were awake. He whispered something in Bucky’s ear. “You looked tired so I let you sleep some more babe.” he smiled as he balanced plates on his hands and walking over to you. He set one down in front of you.

“I’m guessing you and Thor had to take over the cooking?”

“Yeah long story short Steve and Tony, well at least Tony isn’t allowed to cook anymore.”

“What?!” Tony said through a mouthful of pancakes.

“Let’s just eat here in the living room.” Bucky suggested. “Tony and Steve are still cleaning their mess.”

Bucky got back on the couch next to you and you got comfortable in his arms again so you could purposely make it difficult for him to eat his breakfast. He was too strong and still managed to finish his full plate in around 10 bites.

Thor walked up, “Lady Y/N could you assist me with my hair I've been having issues with it lately.”

“Sure thing Thor let me go grab some of my stuff.” you kissed Bucky’s cheek and got up to get brushes and hair ties. When you came back Bucky was gone

“Y/N your husband is attempting to clean up the kitchen with the rest of the men. I recommend not going in there for a while they set a lot of things on fire.”

“Alright now sit on your rear end in front of me.” The massive god did what he was told. After what seemed like hours you finally had Thor’s hair completely brushed and de-tangled. You couldn’t help but smell the air. “Hey Thor do you smell something? Like cake, I smell cake.”

“Uh maybe they’re making more pancakes.” Thor said nervously.

“No that’s definitely cake I smell.” you began to get up when Thor quickly got up in front of you and carried you into another room.

“I didn’t enjoy that view, this is much better.”

“Thor what is going on? What room are we in? Why is it so dark in here?” the lights quickly flicked on and you were greeted with a room of Earth's mightiest heroes in the goofiest party hats.

“Happy Birthday Y/N!” Everyone was in unison and you couldn’t help but glare at your two best friends and husband. You didn’t like celebrating your birthday much. You hadn’t told very many people when your birthday was, a few of those people were Steve, Nat, and Bucky.

“From the looks of it,” Scott walked over and looked at your neck, “Bucky already gave you his present.” Him and Clint went into a giggling fit high fiving each other.

“Haha Scott real funny.” you said as you made your way over to your husband.

“Happy birthday baby. Now I know you don’t like celebrating it that much so that’s why it’s in the morning, so after we can spend the entire day watching old movies and snuggling.” he kissed the top of your head.

“Thank you babe.” You said smiling.

“Alright can we eat cake now? I’m starving.” Scott said.

“Yea we got a cake made finally.” Steve said.

“Let's just be clear that I made the cake after you two fried the first one.” Coulson said.

“Yeah yeah let's just eat.” Tony said.

The entire group brought you back into the kitchen and presented a giant chocolate cake. They all began to sing happy birthday. After you blew out the candles Bucky took you to the side, “Babe I’m supposed to go away for a week or two to monitor something. I leave tomorrow morning. But i’ll try to be back as soon as I can. ”

“You promise you’ll be back within two weeks?”

“Yes of course.”

“We need to do two weeks worth of cuddling tonight then.”

“That’s why your party is in the morning. So we can cuddle all damn day.”

“Sounds perfect. Now let’s eat some cake.” Coulson had already sliced some pieces of cake and had them on small paper plates. He had given you the biggest piece of cake. After everyone had a piece of cake they all gathered around the giant couch.

“Hey Tony put a movie on.” Tony nodded and got up to put a movie on and sat back down. Clint and Nat sat together, Wanda and Vision sat together, everyone else either sat in one giant group or were spread out all over the living room furniture or floor.

Once the movie was over everyone parted and did their own thing. Nat and Clint probably went training or to the ammo store. Tony and Steve were messing around in the kitchen. And everyone else went to their rooms or roamed around the building. “I talked everyone into leaving the living room to ourselves babe.” with that Bucky got up and turned on some slow music, dimmed the lights a little, and casually strolled back over to you and held out his hand. “May I have this dance beautiful?”

“Of course you can.” you took his hand and pulled yourself up. You put your hands on the back of his neck as he placed his on your waist and pulled you even closer to him to where the two of your bodies were pressed together. He looked into your eyes and kissed your nose while slightly swaying. You texted your head on his chest and he rested his head on top of yours. “Thank you babe.”

“No problem honey, I love you so damn much. I’m so lucky to be your husband.”

“I love you too.” you closed your eyes and let your husband lead the swaying. At some point you heard the door open and some giggles. After what felt like hours upon hours of swaying Bucky picked you up and began carrying you into his room.

“You seem sleepy baby why don't you lay down and take a nap.”

“You sure baby? I don’t want to ruin your plans for today. “

“Yeah babe it just means more cuddling.” he gently sat you down on his bed and crawled over you and pulled you on top of him. After a few minutes you were asleep and he began to read a book. You ended up staying asleep for the rest of the day. When you woke up you found Bucky watching one of his favorite documentaries. “It’s about time you woke back up beautiful, I was starting to get lonely. Have I ever told you how cute you look when you're knocked out cold?”

“Shut up Buck.” you buried your face in his chest and groaned. “How long was I asleep babe?”

“I’d say a good probably five hours.” he smiled and played with your hair. “You do remember that i leave in the morning right babe?” You nodded. He kissed the top of your head and pulled your face up to his and softly kissed you. “Let's go get in the shower babe.”

You both got up and made your way into the bathroom to get undressed and into the shower. Bucky immediately went to wash your hair so you stood there for a few minutes. You jumped when he started massaging your shoulders. “Because why not babe.” he said before you could ask anything.

“Baby you’re awesome.” You two stood under the running water for what felt like ever. “I’m really gonna miss you. What am I supposed to do for two weeks?”

“I asked the other guys to make sure you’re doing alright while I’m gone. I’m pretty sure they’ll be entertaining.”

“You never told me why you have to go away.” Bucky paused your massage and jumped slightly. You knew immediately this was something he didn’t want to tell you. “Babe, what are you doing in these two weeks?”

A few moments of silence passed before he continued massaging your back and shoulders more firmly and taking in a long sigh. “I was really hoping you didn’t ask.” He said softly. You turned off the water and stepped out of the shower to grab your towel. “Y/N hold on I didn’t want to upset you.”

“Bucky please just tell me what’s going on?” You pleaded.

Bucky looked you in the eye and then grabbed his towel before taking your hand in his. “It’s Hydra.”

You shuddered upon hearing that name. “What this time? And why two weeks? And why were you trying to keep it a secret?

“Let’s dry off and go to the room first.” he suggested. You nodded your head sadly and the two off you dried off and got dressed before he picked you up and carried you back to his room. When you arrived he sat you down on the bed and sat next to you. He wrapped his arms around you tightly and gave you a few kisses on you cheek.

“Babe, in recent events, Hydra’s been using you as bait to get me and they’re still bent on that. But recent intel found out that now they plan on finding you and killing you on sight. They also have plans to kill off the rest of the Avengers. That one will be tough, but I’m mostly worried for you. Also,-” he took another deep breath. “They have the book.”

You gasped lightly. You knew about the book. The book that had everything about the Winter Soldier. Including how to switch the soldier on and off in an instant.

“I told Fury to burn that book and I thought he did but he told me he kept it and of course Hydra found it and stole it. I’m just scared for myself and you Y/N. It only takes 10 words and I’m gone. I don’t want it to happen anymore. Some of the other guys will go on small missions to try to find Hydra bases and strongholds and whatever. I asked to exclude you because of how bent they seem to be on straight up killing you.”

“But what does that mean you’ll be doing?”

“Fury says some of his scientists may have found a way to erase the words from my memory and that may assure that I’ll never be triggered by them again. They say the process can take anywhere from a few hours to a month. I want to get the words out of my head and never have to risk losing control and hurting anyone, especially you.” He leaned in and kissed your lips gently. “I just don’t want to lose you.” He cuddled you even harder when he said that making you feel sad and scared for him.

You wrapped your arms around him and rubbed his back. “I understand Bucky. And I’m scared to lose you too. Please be careful. And come home as soon as you can. I'll be waiting.

“I know you will. Please promise me you won’t go on any Hydra missions. I don’t want them getting you.”

“I promise.” you said right before he charged in for a kiss.

There was a sudden knock at the door. To your surprise it was Vision. When granted permission to enter he opened the door while holding Tony dressed like a giant baby. “You guys want some ice cream? My sadness senses were tingling.”

Bucky pulled away and laughed. “I could definitely go for some ice cream what about you babe?”

“Oh yeah especially from Iron Man dressed as a baby.”

“This is totally Clint’s idea.” Tony said.

Vision looked confused. “But Mr. Stark I thought it was your-”

“Nah, nah, nah, Clint suggested it I just went with it.” Tony laughed nervously.

You and Bucky casually walked behind Vision and Baby Tony down into the large kitchen where Coulson was already making ice cream sundaes.

“Aww, Mama making us ice cream.” Bucky said.

“Yes, so these two idiots over here don’t burn anything.” He said without looking up.

“Ice cream is frozen though.” Tony said.

“Yea, you guys burned liquid frosting on a cake and you are almost classified as a mad scientist so your cooking privileges are gone.” Tony’s mouth dropped and his pacifier fell to the ground. Steve giggled from the living room. “You helped Steve, your privileges are gone too.” A long and heavy groan was heard from the living room.

“Alright you kids want ice cream you come in here and tell me what you want!” Everyone tried to charge through the tiny door. “Please make a line! Seriously you are all supposed to be adults!”

After dispersing the ice cream to all of the Avengers everyone made their way into the living room to watch Animal House. Everyone assumed their normal cuddle positions; You and Bucky, Wanda and Vision, Nat and Clint, and all the other singles sat on their own. Throughout the movie everyone ate their ice cream and occasionally talked and laughed with each other. It was a perfect night with the family. You and Bucky finished your ice cream quickly so you could cuddle closer quickly. Bucky had grabbed a blanket to keep you warm and close. You barely paid attention to the screen because you were more focused on quietly making out with Bucky under the blankets. The others made comments and cute noises at you two but you didn’t care. The movie was halfway through when you guys finally settled down and it was only a few minutes later when you were out cold.

You awakened in Bucky’s bed. It was nearly 3am and the lights were lightly dimmed.

“Well good evening Babe.” Bucky said. He sat up and leaned in for a kiss.

“Oh thank god I thought you left.” You nearly cried hugging him.

“I was scared you’d sleep through my leaving. I was hoping we could have a bit of, fun, before I have to go off and deal with Hydra for a while.” He leaned in for another kiss before pulling you close to him and snaking his hands up your shirt. He slowly took your shirt off and went to work on your shorts. When he had your shirt and shorts off he carefully took off your undergarments while kissing your neck. Your hand went for his sweatpants. The both of you couldn’t help but smile while looking at each other. One hand was on your waist while the other was used to hold himself up. He slowly worked his way down to your stomach and back up to your lips. He was going terribly slow. “I’m going to be gone for two whole weeks, away from you. I’m gonna make this last a while.” he whispered in your ear quite wickedly. He gently pushed you into the bed kissing and nipping at your chest and neck. He couldn’t help but smirk and growl in your ear, “I’m going to map every goddamn part of your body. So get comfy because I’m going to take my time doing it.” You couldn’t help but bite your lip as he ever so,slightly kisses down your chest ong to your stomach then each of your legs and back up. He kept repeating this process, each time slower than the last. You kept trying to pull him back up to your lips but he refused.

“Bucky this is too slow.” You tried to plead to him.

“Excellent.” he growled. He started to skim your neck with kisses, the metal arm still caressing your waist and side. You wrapped your arms around his body and held on trying to get him to move faster, but he spent much more time on your neck. “I said get comfy, we’re going to be here a while.” he continued kissing up and down your body incredibly slow for what seemed like hours. He then moved up to your lips. While doing so you felt his metal hand sliding down towards your legs and slowly pushing them apart. “Don’t think I’m going any faster.” You were in a deep kiss when he began to enter you, even more slowly. He was finally inside you but his first thrust was barely anything.

“Bucky please!”

“Patience babe.” Was all he had to offer. His thrusts became harder but they were still too slow. He bent down to kiss you again and your hands grabbed onto his hair. With another thrust he lifted his head to try to catch some breath. His expression said he was enjoying this very much. “I’m gonna miss seeing you like this.”

“Dammit just go faster!” And he did, slightly, causing you to moan softly. You clung onto his back when he attacked your neck again. You knew you would have a lot of dark hickies to last you two weeks now. His thrusts were lightly picking up speed but were still too slow. It was driving you to near insanity. “Bucky please! I need you!” A rougher thrust hit you and you had to moan louder. He was starting to groan himself right in your ear. He moved onto to your chest again and moved his thrusts faster. You were moaning and crying out for him as his speed picked up. Now you could feel your climax getting closer. His thrusts became much harder now and now your strength and sanity was starting to leave you completely. He quickly went from too little to too much. “Bu-” His thrust cut you off.

“Sorry hun, thought you were begging for that.” He continued harder and faster. You were so close to your end now. Your body gave up on you and your arms and head collapsed back onto the bed. Bucky continued on your chest and soon back to your neck. Your moans were long and heavy which only made him more eager to finish you off. A few more thrusts and you were done, you knew it. He did too. He leaned in against your ear and growled deeply “You are mine. Always mine.” Your climax hit and you were gone. You panted and strived for each breath as you recovered yourself. You could tell he hit his climax too when he collapsed on top of you. You remained like that for a few moments but it felt like days.

“Once you were both conscious again, Bucky pulled out gently and laid down by your side so he could cuddle you up with him. “I don’t wanna leave. I really don’t. I love you and I need you and I don't know what I’m gonna do without you.” He started kissing your lips and body again. You were still very weak from a few minutes ago but you allowed his kisses to continue. “ Being away from you is torture.”

“I’ll be right here when you get back. Please hurry back. I need you to hurry.”

“I will try. I promise.” He laid you on your back and laid his head on your belly. “Is there a little one in here yet?

“I’m not sure yet.” you smiled.

“If there is, take care of the little guy for me. I’ll have to pamper the both of you when I return.” He smiled and rubbed and kissed your belly for a few more minutes while you laid back and relaxed. You were very tired now and just wanted to sleep with your husband forever now. Once he was done he cuddled up with you again and you were immediately out cold as soon as your head hit his chest. He fell asleep soon after one more kiss.

The next time you woke Bucky was gone and you were alone.