It'll Be Okay (Dan and Phil)
It'll Be Okay.
(Dan and Phil comfort fic)
I walked home in the cold London rain. It wasn't unusual for this to happen, for me it happened almost daily. I'd arrange a drive home, but they'd forget about me, or simply couldn't bother.
So I'm left walking with my umbrella in hand. I shook my head to myself.
Of course people, forgot about me. It was hard not to, I wasn't anything but ordinary, there was nothing about me that was spectacular. I was just me. And that was boring.
I sighed as I turned into my flat. I could already hear my flat mates bickering teasingly at each other.
"Phil, you can't keep putting cat stickers everywhere with out asking!"
"I think they make the place a bit more cheerful."
"Maybe they do, and it's fine if you put them on your laptop, or your air conditioner. Or your bed, or anything that's yours, but please stop covering my piano in them!"
"Fine, I'll put them somewhere's else."
There was a moment of silence.
"Did you just put a sticker on that picture frame?"
"...maybe."
"Phil!"
I chuckled a little as I walked up the stairs, and placed my umbrella and jacket in the closet. "Hey guys." I mumbled to them.
Dan turned to look at me, and then huffed in relief. "Finally! A sane person. Y/N, can you please tell Phil, that our flat is not a sticker book?"
I grumpily ran a hand over my face and groaned. "Just stop decorating the flat, okay?"
Before Phil could even answer I marched towards my room, and closed the door behind.
Once secluded in darkness, I broke. I could feel the tears stream down my face, as I bit back a sob. I sat down on my bed, and held my favourite pillow against my face in a poor attempt to muffle the sobs.
I couldn't do this any more. I couldn't keep pretending to be okay during the day, and then break apart when ever I'm alone. I was sick of it, and everything else in my life.
You're so weak. One insult from a costumer and your degraded to tears? No wonder nobody wants you.
My breath caught in my throat, as the demons in my head began to speak. I shook my head fretfully, in an attempt to make them go away.
You're nothing and you know it. You have nobody who loves you, nobody who even cares about you. Why don't you just do every one a favour and disappear.
A loud sob forced its way passed my lips as I gripped my pillow tighter.
I just want this to end.
I just want it all to
End.
There was a small knock on my door. "Y/N. Are you alright?" It was Phil. "We're just a little worried, cause you, uh, seemed upset coming home." And Dan was there too
They won't understand, how could they? And even if you do tell them, they'll probably leave you. And then you'll really be alone, won't you?
I cringed and pulled at my hair a little. "Stop it." I whimpered. "Just please stop."
"Y/N, who are you talking to?"
There's only one way to make this go away and you know it.
I held my hand over my mouth, and shook my head.
No.
I won't do it.
I couldn't do it.
Could I?
Yes, you could. And when you do, everything will be over. It will finally be silent.
"Y/N. What's going-"
"Just go away!!" I snapped at the door. I stood up and stumbled towards the bathroom.
That's it. Do what has to be done.
I reached into the bathroom shelf, and grabbed a bottle of pills.
Do it! What do you have to live for anyways?! Just kill yourself!!
"Y/N, we're coming in!"
My body froze, as the door flung open. Dan and Phil stood there looking at me with wide eyes.
I quickly tried to unscrew the cap, and finish the job before they could stop me. But it was too late.
Dan already had his arms wrapped around my waist, restraining me, as Phil snatched the bottle from my hands and poured its contents down the toilet and flushed them.
"No!" I cried as I struggled to get out of Dan's grasp. "Let me go!! Just let me do it!!"
A gross sob came out of my mouth, and I found my legs were no longer able to hold me.
Dan quickly caught me, and scooped me up into his arms. He then proceeded to carry me to my bed. He and Phil wrapped his arms around me, and held me as I cried.
"Y/N...It's alright. We're here. We're not going to leave you." Phil muttered as he ran his long, pale fingers through my hair. A whimper came from my lips as I buried my face into his chest.
"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry." I whined.
I felt Dan place his hand, on my back. "No. None of that. It's going to okay. We're going to help you." This made me cry even harder.
"I don't deserve you guys." I hiccuped between the cries. "You're too good. I deserve to be buried somewhere's or kicked around, or forgotten." I whispered the last part.
Phil stiffened at my words. "No. No you don't. Why would you say that?"
I sniffled and looked up at my two best friends. "Because it's true. Look at me. I'm fat, ugly, boring, worthless. I have nothing special about me, and nobody cares about me. I have no one." I gave them a wobbly smile. "And then there's you two. You're handsome, and tall, and you're so funny, everybody loves you guys. Most people don't even know I exist."
Dan shook his head. "That's not true. Phil and I get hundreds of hate every day. And as for you. Y/N, you are so beautiful. And you're strong, and your personality is simply stunning. Phil and I care about you so much. You're like a Y/S/N to us."
I looked up at him shocked. "Do you mean that?" Phil chuckled a bit.
"Yeah. Of course he does. Even though I can't begin to understand what you were thinking right now, or what you've been through, I can help you get through it. We're not going leave your side through this. We'll fight this thing together. You're not alone. Things are going to get better. It'll be alright." Phil ensured.
I hugged them both and began to cry all over again.
"I love you guys."
Dan smiled and pressed a kiss to my head. "We love you too. It'll be okay Y/N. Things are going to get better."