The Condemned Prince
"Your highness, it is time."
The softly spoken voice of Nanna, Loki's personally allocated healer, seemed to gently filter through the room, reaching his ears.
Unmoving, he remained by the open window, savouring the sensation of the pearly rays of sunlight which danced upon his closed eyelids.
A warm breeze carried the earthy scent of Spring, tinged with hints of jasmine and lavender.
"The month is May..."
He muttered solemnly, as if to himself.
Unsure of whether this was a question or a statement, Nanna quietly responded,
"Yes my Lord."
Opening his eyes slowly, he stood for a moment admiring the delicate beauty of the apple and cherry blossom which swayed on the branches of the trees that grew outside of his room.
The convalescent facility was a small building that adjoined the healing rooms; a designated unit which served as a safe haven for Asgardian warriors who required respite after having been badly injured.
For many, the peaceful setting aided their emotional and mental recovery. But Loki had been a resident here for several weeks now, languishing in the tranquility of this glorified sanitarium, and still his mind knew no rest.
His mother, the ever loyal Frigga had not been able to visit him. But she sent words of advice and encouragement via Nanna, who did her best to bring the broken prince some comfort.
"Finding your peace within the chaos....is difficult but not impossible."
She had soothed on numerous occasions, as Loki stared blankly at the wall. Never moving, never speaking.
Eventually, as the day of his judgement neared, he broke his silence by asking after the lady Sif's well being.
And the answer brought both pain and comfort to him in equal measures...
"She is well my Lord."
Unable to supply him with any further information, Nanna had had the forethought to allow him some privacy and left him alone with his thoughts once more.
However it was no easy task having to be the one to report to Frigga, the way in which she had overheard him sobbing quietly through the wall.
After that day, Loki began to show signs of improvement. He responded well when Nanna subtly began coercing him into conversing with her.
They discussed everything from the general history of the nine realms, to the flowers that grew in the gardens. And when she once compared the colour of his green eyes to the ivy which climbed the wall outside his window, he'd laughed and responded in the way his old self would...with a slightly sarcastic, self assured remark.
And so, he gradually became something like himself again, to the outside world at least. But appearances could be deceptive, and he was a master when it came to feigning confidence and indifference.
In reality, he was a hollowed out version of his former self. Nothing more than a living, breathing shadow, that felt completely numb on the inside.
If it hadn't been for the nightmares that plagued him relentlessly, no one would never have known how deeply troubled he still was.
Every night he awoke screaming, drenched in sweat, with his hands balling into fists; clenching the bedsheets so tight that his knuckles showed white.
Each time, Nanna would reassure him that it was just a bad dream. And as he never opened up, flatly refusing to discuss his personal feelings, no one was to know what the dreams were that tormented him so.
The hardest part for Loki though, was waking up only to find his worst fears confirmed, that the nightmare he'd had about losing Sif, due to his own actions, was in fact a reality.
And the pain was more than he could bear. Each night he relived it, and then woke each day to grieve.
"...your highness...I'm sorry, but it is time..."
Nanna's gentle voice spoke again, shattering his thoughts,
"...your brother is here to escort you."
At that Loki's head whipped around, and he had no time to compose himself before Thor suddenly appeared in the doorway; his expression stern.
"Hello brother, how thoughtful of you to come and visit."
Loki remarked, his tone heavy with sarcasm.
"I am in no humour for a war of words today. We must go, Odin awaits you."
Thor replied curtly.
Slowly Loki made his way across the room, taking one final glance back to the window. In preparation for the worst, he wanted to store the memory of the blue sky scattered with white clouds...as he wasn't sure if he'd ever see them again.
"Tell me brother, what are the odds? Am I for the axe, or set to rot in chains for the rest of my life?"
He remarked, feigning a carefree attitude.
As he drew close, Nanna bowed her head in sadness, which didn't go unnoticed by him,
"Come now Nanna, do not weep. Your tears are wasted on me....I am glad to die."
He reassured her, as he gently took hold of her hand,
"As I shan't be seeing you again, thank you for all that you have done for me."
Unable to respond due to the sob she had to suppress, she simply curtsied as the condemned prince dropped her hand and made his way through the doorway, closely followed by Thor.
"Mother is doing everything within her power to prevent father from sentencing you to death."
Thor spoke hurriedly, as several armed guards were now heading their way,
Forcing a strained laugh, he shook his head.
"Well she really needn't bother. I do not fear death...I welcome it."
Agitated, Thor chose to ignore his remark,
"Listen well brother, mother has managed to obtain some water from the Vimur....in the event that you are imprisoned, you will benefit from it. She strongly urges you to take it-"
"In order to forget?"
Loki interrupted him sharply, and shot him an angry look,
"...I shall not!"
He added defiantly, just as the guards approached.
They soon set about clamping the convict in irons, which was a lengthy task given the amount of chains required.
Loki was considered highly dangerous, and Tyr; the master of the guards, had gone to great lengths in order to keep Loki restrained. The wrist shackles he now wore had been specially crafted; enchanted with a magical incantation in order to prevent him from wielding his sorcery,
"....and what of....her?"
He continued, his voice dropping to a mere whisper. And for some reason he couldn't bring himself to utter Sif's name.
Perceptively bristling, Thor leaned in so as not to be overheard,
"She is perfectly well, but you must put all thoughts of the lady Sif from your mind today. Do not under any circumstances mention her to father. It will only stoke his fury further."
"I am no longer particularly interested in self preservation Thor, in case you failed to notice-"
"Perhaps not, but nonetheless you ought to know that the uprisings in Vanaheim grow more serious by the day, and father lays the blame at your door. He believes you coveted Njord's throne because of your incessant need to rule. Having already attempted this on Midgard, he now views you as a very serious threat. So do not aggravate the situation further....for mothers sake."
Loki shot his estranged brother a poignant look,
"It's awfully good of mother trying to save me from the executioners blade. Tell me, is she proud of these sacrifices I've made? Of my falsely implicating myself?"
Brusquely, Thor turned, unwilling to be drawn into such a conversation.
Now was not the right time. Perhaps there never would be a right time.
The troop began making their way to the throne room in procession, with the Thunderer leading from the front. Two of the guards walked behind Loki, holding onto the chains that were affixed to him.
Knowing that they still feared him and wrongly presumed he may try to escape, amused the trickster no end. If only they knew, his will to fight had long since diminished.
In stark contrast to the last time Loki had been on trial, today the hallways were free from onlookers. Guards had been posted all around the palace, and all access denied.
Just as they neared the large, gilded doors to the throne room, Thor withdrew. At his fathers behest, this time he was not to be present during the sentencing.
Tyr, who had been overseeing the prisoners transportation from the back, made to walk by in order to lead from the front in Thor's place. Hesitating momentarily, he purposely fell into step beside Loki,
"Your conduct has taken its toll on the Allfather, silver tongue..."
He muttered under his breath, his words only just audible,
"...he looks aged, there are rumours of him stepping down, which would of course then make Thor our rightful king..."
He paused briefly for effect before adding,
"...and every king needs a queen."
Halting abruptly at his words, but quickly forced to move along, Loki's emerald eyes bored into the captain of the guard,
"Rumours have always been rife in the house of Odin. Very few have any real substance to them. It is probably little more than idle gossip."
"Perhaps. But Odin is weary. In the event Thor becomes king, his mortal will never be accepted nor permitted to reign by his side. Protocol will never permit it....and the lady Sif has unmistakably become rather fond of him again it would seem-"
"You are mistaken!"
Loki hissed, through gritted teeth, barely managing to keep his emotions under control.
He sincerely hoped that the upstart was merely trying to provoke him into an outburst.
But there was no time for further exchanges, as the doors were opened, and they entered in silence.
The room was dimly lit, and eerily silent, save for the sound of Loki's clinking chains and the heavily booted guardsmen.
At the all too familiar sight of Odin perched high upon Hlidskjalf, exuding power and dominance, Loki straightened in an attempt to resume his own confident posture. He strode forwards unashamedly with an air of defiance.
Frigga watched with bated breath from the sidelines, as her beloved son was led into the room, chained like an animal once more. And it broke her heart all over again.
Unable to resist, as he drew level with her she spoke first, her small voice shattering the heavy silence,
"Loki.."
"Hello mother, have I made you proud?"
He replied sardonically.
He could see the hurt clearly visible on her face, her sad eyes staring at him imploringly,
"Please, do not make this worse."
She begged.
"Define worse?!"
He retorted bluntly, shooting her a knowing look.
"Enough!"
Odin bellowed from his throne. His expression fierce,
"I will speak to the prisoner alone!"
Slowly, Frigga withdrew via a side entrance. Loki watched her leave with a heavy heart and for a fleeting moment he pondered over whether those words would be the last they shared.
Quickly he dismissed such thoughts from his mind and stepped forward before the mighty Allfather.
Rebellious to the last, and irritated at Odin's pompous demeanour, he boldly showed his contempt; pouring scorn upon such protocol by standing to attention, as a mock salute.
An awkward moment of silence passed before he forced a laugh,
"I really don't see what all the fuss is about."
Finally Odin replied,
"Do you truly not feel the gravity of your crimes? Wherever you go there is war, ruin....and death!"
Sensing that Odin's emphasis on the word death was mostly associated with the high number or mortals who had died on Midgard, he shot back at him with what he believed to be a most valid point,
"I went down to Midgard to rule the people of earth as a benevolent God....just like you."
"We are not Gods..."
Odin retorted argumentatively,
"...we are born, we live, we die. Just as humans do."
Bemusd by his estranged father's hypocrisy and reluctance to acknowledge the staggering difference between the races when it conveniently suited him, Loki smirked,
"Give or take....five thousand years."
Blatantly ignoring his remark, Odin surveyed his adopted son closely, and the weight of his heavy gaze upon him caused Loki to shift uneasily.
"All this, because Loki desires a throne."
No longer able to contain his temper, Loki raised his voice in indignation,
"It is my birthright!"
"Your birthright was to die!"
The Allfather suddenly bellowed back,
"As a child....cast out on a frozen rock..."
This harsh declaration silenced Loki instantly,
"...if I had not taken you in.."
He continued,
"...then you would not be here now to hate me."
And hate was the right word. Loki now despised this man he'd once called father. But just as he no doubt barely recognised him for what he had become, the feeling was completely mutual.
In that instant, Loki no longer saw Odin as the man who raised him....he was nothing more than a stranger now.
As Frigga would attest, her husband had never been one for being overly loving or affectionate. But now he felt he was revealing himself in his true light, cruel, callous and lacking empathy and compassion. Even by taking him as a helpless infant in order to use him as a bargaining tool, proved how calculated and cold he truly was. It was nothing more than a strategic manoeuvre on his part.
Loki wanted to say all of this, to scream it from the top of his lungs. But he was too heartsick and soul weary. Instead he simply took a half step forward, causing the guards to pull on his chains, and responded calmly,
"Look if I am for the axe then for mercy's sake, just swing it!"
He met Odin's gaze deliberately as he continued,
"It's not that I don't love our little talks but...I don't love them."
Odin's cold expression remain unaltered,
"Frigga is the only reason you are alive and you will never see her again.....you'll spend the rest of your days in the dungeons."
At that Loki shifted more abruptly as panic began to rise. The death penalty would've been much more to his liking.
The thought of being contained for an eternity whilst Sif went on living without him, out in the world...caused an icy chill to creep down his spine. Then another thought struck him....what if the rumours Tyr had taunted him about were true?
"And what of Thor?"
He blurted, visibly more agitated as his mind whirred,
"You'll make that witless oaf King while I rot in chains?!"
"Thor must strive to undo the damage you have done. He will bring order to the nine realms....and then yes, he will be King."
Eyes widening in horror as Odin dealt this brutal blow, Loki could feel the guards tugging him back. But he could focus on little more than the realisation that once this happened....his precious Sif would officially become Thor's wife.
His feet turned to lead, and he had to fight the feeling of nausea which suddenly overwhelmed him.
Unable to muster a response, he allowed the guards to escort him away without protest.
********** ***********
After being placed in an allocated cell in the main prisons, which was a far cry from the concealed dark and dingy cell he'd occupied once before, he waited until most of the guards had dispersed before addressing Tyr; who seemed to be loitering behind.
"I need you to take an urgent message to her majesty at once. Tell her that I am willing to take her up on her offer. She will understand my meaning."
Turning his head to look up at him, Tyr regarded the condemned prince indifferently,
"Contact with her majesty is forbidden. Odin gave strict instructions."
Stepping closer to the force field which served as a powerful barrier in order to contain him, along with all of his magical abilities, Loki glared at the guard master angrily,
"Then send word to Thor...The Allfather did not stipulate that I weren't to have any contact with him, did he!"
With a slight nod, Tyr left and made his way out of the prisons.
Outside, he was met by the Thunderer himself, who looked deeply troubled,
"Tyr, where is lady Sif?"
He demanded gruffly.
"I believe she departed for Vanaheim this morning my lord, along with the Warriors three."
"And Heimdall permitted her to leave?"
He cried,
"She should not be engaging in battle, not in her present state."
"Regrettably Heimdall was not able to dissuade her, as the lady is currently unaware of her condition."
Tyr reminded him,
"And perhaps, if I may be so bold sire....should any unfortunate accident occur, it may be for the best."
Thor's wide brow furrowed into a deep scowl,
"That is too bold! The lady Sif's well being is of the upmost importance, and however unfortunate her predicament is, I do not take kindly to you implying that the possibility of her losing her unborn child is beneficial."
Lowering his head, Tyr fixed his eyes on the ground,
"My apologies your highness, I should not have said such a shameful thing."
"Well in future have a care how you speak Tyr,"
He warned, though there was no malice in his voice,
"I shall leave at once for Vanaheim and attempt to gain control of the situation."
He continued, turning as he spoke, and the two men began making their way towards the bifrost.
"I will escort the lady Sif back here to Asgard, where she can be kept under supervision...Loki will also have to be observed, his behaviour will need close monitoring. His healer informs me his mind is still fragile, and Frigga is concerned for his well being. So you must inform me at once, should he require assistance. As he requested anything?"
Pausing only briefly, before shaking his head in response, Tyr replied calculatedly,
"No sire. He hasn't."