Chapter 3
I woke up from a nightmare, sweating and panting. I had another really bad day that afternoon and it was over-lapping into my dreams. I glanced over at the bed next to mine, watching your chest rise and fall. You were sleeping – you were still alive. I released the breath I didn’t know I was holding, relieved, and tried to calm back down.
I lay awake, focusing on your breathing but it was cold and I couldn’t go back to sleep. I didn’t want to wake you but I got up anyway, my terror over-powering my politeness. And anyway, I had been crawling into bed next to you a lot ever since the- the experi- …since getting our powers. You didn’t seem to mind, but still, I hesitated. You were after all, going through the same things I was and I didn’t want to add “needy sister” to the list of things you were dealing with.
As soon as I put weight on your bed, you woke up. “…Sis?” you asked, your voice wasn’t groggy and sleep ridden. You sounded alert and possibly shocked and I worried for you so much in that moment; it was a physical pain I could feel in my chest.
“Yeah,” I answered and your body visually relaxed. You used to be a heavy sleeper; I could poke and prod you for five minutes before you woke up. But now it’s different; now you’re always on edge. It makes me nervous and a little frightened. You used to be carefree too. I used to be more carefree.
Once I was situated in your arms, I immediately felt safer. Sleep didn’t seem impossible anymore, but I was still shaken from my nightmare. “Tell me again. I don’t feel brave,” I prompted in a small voice.
I couldn’t help but ask for you to say it all again
I stared at my empty cot, the room illuminated by the almost-full moon shining in through the single window; always trying to commit these moments to memory but I could never remember your exact words. I could never get the feeling out of my chest though – the blooming flower of hope and courage, the light that always got brighter when you were around.
I tried to write it down but I could never find a pen