Chapter Thirty-Eight
Steve and Bucky made a pallet for Runa in the back of the wagon, padded with the blankets and quilts donated to the ranch by the people of the church. They had carefully loaded the wagon with the coffin and some of the supplies Runa had ordered the previous week, before getting Runa from Bruce’s and tucking her safely into the wagon. Steve sat in the back with her, resting her head on his lap during the ride. Bucky drove the wagon, Coulson sitting beside him on the wagon seat.
Bruce had advised that Steve purchase hard candies for Runa, as the ether she had been dosed with would leave her nauseous for a while yet, and the candies might help settle her stomach. They would help with the increased salivation she would experience as well. Steve had purchased a small sack of lemon drops and another of peppermints, keeping them at the ready during the ride. He was also prepared to help her up so she could be sick over the side of the wagon if necessary, but Bruce had given Runa a small dose of laudanum to make her comfortable for the ride, which caused her to sleep through most of it. Something Steve was glad of, as every bump in the road that rocked the wagon wrung a pained little sound from her, even though she was unconscious.
During the course of the ride Steve found himself looking down at the bruised face in his lap, the delicate features discolored and swollen. His heart ached for his little wife, and he wished that there had been something he could have done to prevent all this, anything at all. He had so much to atone for already where Runa was concerned, had hurt her in so many ways. Too many ways. His Ma would be furious at how he had treated Runa, would have told him that he should be ashamed of himself. And he was ashamed, thinking back on everything he had done and said since Runa had stepped off the train that had brought her to Texas.
“I promise, I’ll do better.” He whispered down to the still form of his wife. “Just don’t leave us. The ranch is a better place for you being here.” He brushed back a lock of flaxen hair. “I’m better for your being here.”
“You say something, Steve?” Bucky asked, half turning and wincing as he did, before being chivvied into facing forward by Coulson.
“I was just talking to Runa. Not that she’s able to understand what I’m saying.” Steve sighed. “Just… There’s a lot unsaid between the two of us, and I need to fix that. I’m going to fix that. Somehow.”
“You generally fix things being unsaid by actually saying them.” Coulson pointed out dryly.
“Generally, but there are some things that are hard for me to say.”
“Steve isn’t the best when it comes to talking to the fairer sex.” Bucky told Coulson, “Hell, there have been more than a few times where he got tongue tied around men as well.”
Coulson nodded. “I’ve known a couple of people like that. All I can say is try and talk things out, no matter how hard it is to do it.”
“I know.” Steve sighed. “When she’s a little bit better I will. Doc said he didn’t want her too distressed for a while yet.”
“You think what you have to say will distress her?” Coulson asked sharply. Steve was pretty certain it would, but he didn’t want to confess that to the other man.
“Might, might not. I don’t want to risk it.”
They fell into silence again, not speaking until Bucky turned the wagon onto the drive. That was when Steve reached down and brushed hair back from Runa’s face, before moving her gently. “Runa.” He murmured, repeating her name a few times as he worked to draw her from her drugged slumber. She finally opened her eyes blearily as Bucky slowed the wagon to a halt. She looked up at Steve, confused, and tried to sit up quickly, only to let out a little cry of pain and fall back. Steve winced, before moving to help her gently into a seated position. “It’s all right. You just had a good nap on the trip to the ranch.” He said soothingly as she looked around, shock and pain written on her features as the ranch hands came running to the wagon.
“What happened?” She managed.
“There was a fire.” Steve said, moving to stretch his legs, which had gone numb from sitting in one position with her lying on them for so long.
“Missus Rogers,” Dum Dum said with a relieved smile as he came to stand beside the wagon, “We are so glad to have you safe back home.”
Runa managed a tremulous smile, blinking back tears at the destruction of their home. “Oh, I’ll be fine.” She tried to joke it off, “I bet you all just missed my cooking.”
Dum Dum’s grin broadened, pleased to see her keeping her spirits up, even though it was a struggle. “That is exactly right, ma’am.”
“We’re going to have to settle for someone else’s cooking for a while.” Steve said firmly. “She can’t do any lifting-”
“I can still cook if someone else does the lifting.” Runa reasoned, wincing as she tried to move from the wagon, but Steve stopped her, before climbing out of the wagon, stumbling a bit and wincing as he felt the pins and needles sensation in his legs as circulation returned.
“Runa, we’ll be fine with someone else fixing beans tonight. It won’t kill us.”
“I can at least make cornbread.” She sighed.
Steve’s resolved wavered slightly as he thought about that.
“Cornbread won’t hurt her.” Bucky pointed out quietly, “And you know none of us will be able to make anything decent to eat with the beans.”
Runa was looking at the house. “… I need to see how bad it is.” She said quietly. “Inside.”
“I’ll carry you to the dining room, and you can direct from there. You’ll be able to see most of the damage from there, without risking anything.” Steve finally sighed. “And you can tell one of us how to mix up the cornbread. We’ll do it. Doc didn’t want you doing too much.”
“Cooking is not-”
“The way you do it, it is.” Bucky said as Steve helped Runa to stand, before sweeping her into his arms and holding her carefully.
“Come on, General. Let the troops take care of you, now.” Steve said quietly. “You’ve looked after us long enough.”
She sighed, and rested her head against Steve’s shoulder wearily. “All right.” She murmured. “I suppose I can agree to that. But I want to see Happy Sam, and make sure he’s all right.” She closed her eyes, “He tried to save me.”
“I know. I know and I will be forever grateful.”
~*~
Runa instructed Bucky in the proper way of soaking beans before cooking them, before asking if she could see Happy Sam. Steve was determined not to let her walk more than a few steps, and he carried her to the spare room where Happy Sam was sleeping. Junior had been sitting in the chair placed beside the bed, keeping an eye on Sam, and his face lit up when he saw Runa.
“Missus Rogers, I am sure glad you’re back.”
“I’m glad I’m back as well.” Steve set Runa down on her feet carefully, and hovered by her as she took a step closer to the bed. It was painful to watch her walk, her movements stiff, clearly pained. “How is he doing?”
“He was awake about an hour ago. I made sure to give him some water, got a bit of the broth from the stew we had for dinner into him. Gave him another dose of laudanum, just like Doctor Banner said to. I even checked the clock to make sure the time was right.” He said rather anxiously.
Runa sat heavily down on the edge of the bed, reaching out and taking one of Happy Sam’s hands, giving a gentle squeeze. Doctor Banner had explained to her that Happy Sam was fine for now, but he wasn’t out of the woods yet. There were still so many things that could go wrong, that could take Sam from them just as Falsworth had been taken.
“I’d like to sit with him tomorrow, if that’s all right.” She ventured. “I want to talk to him when he wakes up.”
Junior looked to Steve, then to Runa, “Missus Rogers,” He ventured, “Sam is in an awful lot of pain when he is awake. I don’t think he’ll be much for talking-”
“I have to tell him what it meant, him and Falsworth coming to help me the way they did.” She said, closing her eyes. She felt so tired, but there was so much to be done. “Doctor Banner told me that Sam might… That it could happen at any time, if it was going to happen. I need to tell him. Just in case. I don’t want him to go without me talking to him.”
“Runa,” Steve said gently, “Sam knows. You don’t need to say a thing to him.”
“Even if he doesn’t need to hear it, I need to say it.” She looked down to the sleeping man, “If it hadn’t been for them coming in when they did, they wouldn’t have been hurt, yes, but Mister Brock still would have carried me off, and you wouldn’t have known who had done it. He might have actually managed to get me on that train.” She shuddered at the thought.
“But he didn’t.”
“He might have.”
Steve sighed, knowing that there would be no use in arguing with her. “All right. When he’s awake tomorrow, we’ll bring you in to talk to him. I promise.”
“Thank you.” She said quietly, just watching Happy Sam for a while. “He was my first friend here.”
“I thought Laura was your first friend.”
She shook her head. “No, Sam was my first true friend here. He showed me how things were run around the ranch, helped me find my way in the kitchen.” She looked up to Steve, sorrow on her face. “He can’t die.”
Steve looked to her, his own expression just as sorrowful. “I can’t promise that he won’t, but I pray he doesn’t. We’re all praying he sticks around for a long time yet.”
Runa sighed. “It’s in the Lord’s hands now.” She agreed, before looking to Sam, leaning towards him slightly. “But if you have any say at all in things, Samuel Sawyer, you come back to us. We’re not ready to let you go just yet.”
Happy Sam didn’t even twitch, and Runa sighed, releasing his hand, before struggling to stand. Steve moved to help her quickly, but she batted his hands away impatiently, her blows having as much force as those of a kitten batting at a string. Steve sighed, and let her rise on her own, though he stayed near as she dragged herself slowly from the room.
If they had looked back, they would have seen that Happy Sam looked more restful, and there was a slight smile on his face.