Knowhere I'd Rather Be
Knowhere
2 Weeks Later...
Peter still didn’t understand why they were going to Taneleer Tivan. The Collector was a complete nut job that Peter wanted nothing to do with. To his surprise, neither did Ronan. How Ronan knew who the Collector was, was a mystery though. It was more than just name recognition, too, because Ronan didn’t just dislike him. He seemed to despise him. Peter had nearly rolled his eyes when Gamora suggested it and well, ok so he would have rolled his eyes, too, but so did Ronan.
And that was another thing bothering Peter. Before, when he felt odd emotions it was hard to tell where it came from or why he felt the way he did. For a while he wasn’t sure if he wasn’t losing his mind or possibly just becoming a big jerk. Since holding that stone a second time, however, he very much felt the difference. He knew damned well where it came from and yet he had a harder time pushing the foreign feelings aside.
The others either hadn’t noticed because they’d gotten so used to Peter being jerk, or they knew and just didn’t want to acknowledge it. Ronan never showed himself, but his presence was only too obvious. He still flooded Peter with strength and skill whenever anyone but Groot touched him. Though that exception was likely made only because of how little Groot wanted to be around Peter as of late.
As they got off the ship and headed for the newly rebuilt “museum” Peter felt an annoyance from Ronan akin to what Gamore must have felt anytime she tripped over Rocket’s tools. Not that the graceful assassin would ever admit to such a thing. Still, the disgust and irritation seething within him was beyond annoying.
He wished he knew how to turn this off or maybe even tell the big, dumb, blue bastard to back off! Annoyance rolled forward tinged with a bit of embarrassment. Too many adjectives, none of which were imaginative or mature enough for the insultee. Oh sure, that Ronan made sure Peter understood.
Dick.
When they entered Taneleer Tivan approached and Gamora began to explain everything. The white haired alien only appeared a little surprised to learn that Ego, the living planet, was Peter’s father. When they got to the part about Ronan terrorizing the guard, the Collector smirked. When Drax stated that they prevented Ronan from escaping the stone, he outright snickered.
“Do you believe that, Mr. Quill?” Tivan asked. “Do you believe you and your guardians triumphed over the zealous Kree?”
Peter paled a bit and then shook his head slowly. “No.” he admitted. “I think uh, I think I might have accidently let him out when I touched the stone.”
“What? How?” Gamora frowned. “Does it have to do with Peter’s powers?”
“Yes and also no.” Tivan smiled cryptically as he looked now at the toddler Groot. “Is that the same specimen from before?”
“Back off.” Rocket snarled as Drax quickly bent down and picked up the tree and placed him upon his left shoulder. The raccoon then climbed the large tattooed alien and perched himself on the right side.
“Taneleer, please focus.” Gamora sighed, “We are here for answers. We need to know why Peter was apparently able to release Ronan and why Ronan is able to…well, to take him over at times.”
“And yet you have failed to offer any kind of payment, let alone one sufficient enough for those specific answers.” He shrugged in response, eyes still settled on the Groot.
“Okay, so other than Groot, what do you want?” Peter asked.
Tivan’s grin widened as he turned to face Peter, looking him dead in the eyes. “Make me something. Something unique. Something never before seen.” He challenged.
“I could only do that on my father’s planet. That where the power came from. He said once he died that gift would die with him. All of his ‘gifts’ actually.”
“He lied.” Tivan blurted simply. “Those may have been his limits and the very limits he intended for his offspring, but he lost that control the moment he introduced a second set of DNA to his true progeny. The presence of your mother’s genes changed all of that as it did for scores of your siblings. That’s why the majority of them did not develop his abilities.”
Peter really didn’t want to think about brothers or sisters. It felt like losing his mother or Yondu all over again. Not as intensely of course, but they were still family and dammit, he shouldn’t have lost them before he knew them. Ego was a monster.
“Focus, Peter.” Tivan’s voice was a little firmer than Peter expected but it had the desired effect. It startled and interrupted his melancholy thoughts.
Taking a deep breath, Peter put his hands together as he had when Ego was instructing him. He tried to imagine something, anything, but he couldn’t. All he could think of was Ego, and thinking of Ego made him think of his mother, thinking of his mother made him think of her dying. Dying made him think of Yondu. It was all just pain and he wasn’t sure that anything he managed to create would be good.
He closed his eyes tightly and was taken back when he saw a strange black petaled flower with a dark green stem. It was a mourning flower from Hala. A black Nessifer, apparently. They came in many colors but black was a symbol of undying love and commitment and thus was often used for funerals. It looked strikingly similar to Terran roses but the thorns were large and exaggerated and the bud was probably three times larger.
Feeling strangely settled though still sad, Peter pushed his hands together and focused on his mother before the cancer when her long red hair would catch in the wind, he thought of how soft her skin was when she held his hand or wiped away his tears after he got into a fight. He could feel something forming, felt something soft but strong trying to wrap about his fingers and then as his thoughts shifted from his mother to the man he now accepted as his father, he swore he heard his whistling.
Looking down he saw an odd…flower? It had dark blue iridescent petals the same color as Yondu. It almost looked like a water lily atop it’s pad, but where green leaves would have been there were crimson red leaves that reminded him of his father’s eyes. There was also about half a dozen orange-red vines that matched the shade of his mother’s hair. Looking closer he recognized that the vines dancing in the air, were more like hollowed feathers and they were what created the whistling sound he heard. He set it down gently on a counter space in front of the group. As he touched the leaves or petals it felt almost like skin and there was a fragrance, too. It was sweet, almost like cotton candy and vanilla, just like Mom.
He stared down at his creation in surprise and watched as the vines lifted and fell in the air and continued to whistle a melody. It was heart-wrenching to hear and if despair had a definitive sound, it’s tune would be it. It was as if the plant was hurt and lonely.
Even with as sad as the plant seemed, there was a strange feeling of pride forming in his chest that carried a bit of excitement with it. Ronan was reinforcing both feelings with his own mirrored emotions. It was strange to thing that Ronan was proud of what he’d just accomplished and yet he knew that’s what it was.
“Wonderful!” Taneleer praised. “Spectacular in its intricacies.” The Collector finally raised his eyes from the plant and looked at Peter and smiled like a shark. “It would appear, Peter Quill, that you are the soulmate of Ronan the Accuser.”
“Bullshit!” Peter insisted. “First off, there’s no such things! It’s the stone. It created a mental link or something.” He ignored the push of annoyance at his perceived stupidity from Ronan.
Gamora and Drax were alarmingly silent and even Rocket didn’t have some kind of retort. Had they all lost their minds? There was no such things as soulmates! Yet he couldn’t deny that Drax looked both hurt and confused while Gamora was simply pale with fright.
“Perhaps a bit of both, then.” Tivan admitted. “The link could not have been created if you weren’t already soulmates. Ronan would have simply been trapped in that stone for eternity like all the others. It seems like long odds that Ronan’s soul mate would just so happen to have the ancient celestial powers required to touch the stone that he would find himself trapped in, and yet…Destiny.”
“Wait, so the only thing the stone did to Ronan was trap his soul?” Gamora frowned. “Everything is just because of Peter’s sleeping powers and his apparent connection to him?”
“Awakened powers, you mean.” Tivan corrected with a grin as he began to pet the petals of the whistling flower. “It requires another. Its lonely.”
“It’s a plant.” Peter rolled his eyes.
Tivan shrugged his shoulders. “Let’s call it a test then. See if you can replicate what you’ve already created.”
Peter wanted to protest but he felt Ronan’s own curiosity to see if he could repeat his success. Actually it felt like a dare. Like he was goading Peter into trying again just for the sake of making fun of him if he failed.
Once more he took a deep breath and purposely thought through the same thoughts he did when creating the first one but this time, something was different. While he saw his mother’s hair and felt her skin, the coloring was going to be off. It was going to be off because instead of Centaurian blue skin and red eyes, all he could see was Kree blue and lavender eyes. He blushed profusely when he saw the plant, wondering if any of his friends had made the connection to his thoughts on Ronan. The flower had lavender stems and leaves and Kree blue iridescent petals.
Tivan certainly caught it judging by his smile.
The second flower was placed next to the first as they both continued to whistle their sad melody, however after a moment together that changed. The tune began to swell into something gentle and ultimately happier and maybe even a little uplifting. Tivan took hold of them both and carried them over to a small pond that Peter hadn’t even noticed. Then again with all the crap in this place, it wasn’t surprising that he hadn’t noticed it before.
“Allow me to keep them both, along with whatever they spawn, and I will always be available to you as a source of information on your lineage, your soul bond, and the Infinity Stones.” Tivan offered. “Trust me when I say this, you will never get a better deal from me in the future.”
Honestly, Peter really didn’t want those things on his ship anyhow. They just made him sad. “Fine, whatever. How did a Terran wind up with a Kree soulmate? Especially one of the same sex?”
The Collector smiled, seeming pleased with the caliber of question. “Soulmate is a term often misunderstood and at times misused and all because of one particular type of bond formed by them. It is certainly the most common type, but falling in love with or even liking your soulmate is not mandatory.
“The Kree in particular believe that a soulmate is a destined individual who may serve as a loyal friend, a devoted lover, a dedicated servant, a familial companion, or the most highly prized; a worthy nemesis.” Tivan explained to the shock of the group. “Kree have often grown in power and popularity among their people when a soulmate is discovered; especially one that is not Kree.”
“Because they’re more likely to be a nemesis.” Peter realized with a roll of his eyes. He rubbed the bridge of his nose as Tivan laughed at his irritation. “So how do other species get linked up, again?”
“Destiny.” Taneleer answered. “It seems vague but it’s quite specific. You are two beings with souls that were bonded upon your creation. There are many different theories as to whether the original lives lived were always the same species or if some great creator linked us all. No one knows for certain.”
“So your answer is no one knows how or why people of same or opposite sexes or difference races are matched?” Rocket clarified before Peter could.
“Destiny is the answer.” Drax supplied. “A soulmate is our destined one. They are someone who regardless of race or gender, will impact our lives in the most powerful of ways.”
“You gotta believe in destiny to have soulmate then, right?” Peter scoffed. “Cause I don’t. I believe in free will.”
“Having free will doesn’t negate Destiny.” Tivan informed him. “Several species and races believe that their soul mates are someone they are destined to meet, while others believe they must seek theirs out or they will never find them. The Kree, among others, believe the former while Terrans and Zen-Whoberis are examples that believe the latter.”
“Which are correct in their assumptions?” Drax asked.
“The Kree and those like them.” Taneleer answered. “All soulmates will meet at least once in every lifetime. Now some are more sensitive to their soulmates, such as the Kree. It is said that they are so sensitive to their bond that they can recognize their soulmate through mere mention of their name.”
“So, then Ronan knew I was his soulmate from the moment Korath told him about me?” Peter frowned.
“Yes.” Tivan’s eyes moved to and watched the plants. “Kree are very possessive of their soulmates, regardless of the role they play in their lives. If you are his enemy, if he chooses to see you that way, he will allow no other the ‘honor’ of harming or killing you but himself.”
“Gee thanks.” Peter muttered.
“Don’t be so arrogant.” Tivan warned. “He may not see you as a nemesis. That is a very high title and he may not find you worthy of it.”
“Hey! We defeated him and I held that stupid stone.” He pointed out as his friends nodded their agreement, Groot adding his own “I am Groot,” to the conversation.
“No. The stone did.” Tivan said and at once Peter felt Ronan’s pleasure and agreement. For how often they seemed to agree, he couldn’t help but wonder why Ronan hated him so much.
“Well fuck him.” Peter snapped and then shook his head, trying to get back on track. “But he’s dead. So why the fuck is he sticking around?”
“Is he dead?” Taneleer countered.
“Of course he’s dead!” Rocket shouted.
“The strone destroyed him.” Gamora added.
“We all witnessed his destruction.” Drax nodded.
“You witnessed the destruction of his body. You did not witness his death.” Taneleer smiled.
“The fuck I didn’t! When a body gets ripped apart like that…blown into tiny bits? What the Hell do you call that if not death?” Peter all but shouted.
“The stone destroyed his body but kept his soul. If he were dead, he would have been sent to the death realm.” Taneleer tried again, but Peter just wasn’t getting it.
Rocket’s eyes widened suddenly as he looked from the plants and back to Peter and over to Tivan. “You gotta be frickin’ kidding me!” He exclaimed. “Ronan wants Peter to build him a body, doesn’t he?”
“What?” Peter and Gamora exclaimed at the same time. A shiver ran down his spine as he heard the Collector’s laugh. “Fat chance. No way I’d do that for him!”
“Soulmates of any species have considerable sway with one another.” Drax stated contemplatively. “Ronan’s connection to you is already mighty if the Kree murderer is capable of channeling his strength, emotions and skill into your body.”
“Well he isn’t getting a body out of me! He doesn’t have that much sway and there’s no way I could build him a body if I wanted to!” Peter insisted.
Tivan’s eyes fell to the lavender stem before they made deliberate, mocking eyes contact with Peter’s green orbs. He smirked in a knowing challenge to his words.
“He doesn’t!” Peter shouted. “You hear that you big blue freak! I’m never, ever making you a body, so just forget it!”
When Taneleer laughed at him, Peter could have sworn he heard Ronan’s deep chuckle accompany it. He shivered at the sound and frowned because he didn’t see anything or anyone nearby. “So how do we destroy the Humie’s soulmate?”
“Two ways.” The Collector shrugged. “Trap him back in the stone and destroy it or kill Peter Quill.”
“Hey!” Peter snapped again.
“While Ronan is without a body and not technically dead, he is tethered to you.” Tivan shrugged. “Cut the ‘tether’ and his soul will have no choice but to go to Death’s realm.”
“Okay so clearly we just gotta trap him again and figure a way to destroy the stone.” Rocket shrugged.”
“No!” Drax almost shouted to the surprise of the entire group. “That wouldn’t kill Ronan, that would destroy his soul.”
“So?” Peter and Rocket asked at the same time.
“Peter, if your soulmate is destroyed permanently, you lose all ability to feel emotions. Forever.” Gamora explained. “His death will hurt and cause a strange numbness for a time, but destruction…It’s bad. You’d never laugh, cry, or shout. You’d never feel anything in any life.”
“Well that would suck.” Rocket shook his head.
“Ya think?” Peter returned.
“So what do we do now?” Rocket asked. “Not like we can kill ‘im.”
“Not with his soulmate protecting him.” Drax agreed as he rubbed his chin. “Getting at Peter would be difficult.”
“Seriously?” Peter demanded of his two so called friends.
“That is enough.” Gamora announced with a roll of her eyes. “We are not killing Peter or destroying Ronan. We’ll just have to figure something else out.”
“There’s nothing to figure out!” Peter growled. “I’m just going to fucking ignore him.”
“That is the Terran way. Not that they can help it. Their awareness is considerably lower than other races.” Taneleer prodded, Peter suspected it was on purpose. “It’s true you know. Humans walk past their soulmates constantly. They aren’t very sensitive at all to their bond or connection.”
“Seriously? He’s attacked my friends through me!” Peter brought up, clearly confused.
“Because he is without a body and his connection is stronger at the moment.” Taneleer replied, but Peter suddenly wondered if he was hiding something.
“But Peter isn’t 100% Terran.” Gamora realized.
“I am Groot.” Groot whined.
“Me, too.” Peter decided. He grabbed hold of Groot and started to walk toward the exit. “This conversation really sucks and I don’t want to know anymore right now. I’m gonna take Groot to get something to eat and then…I don’t know, I’ll figure out some way to die or something.”
He didn’t wait for a response from his shocked and concerned friends as he left the museum. He couldn’t believe what he’d just learned. What was he going to do? This sucked. He didn’t even know soulmates were a thing! That required an actual belief in souls to begin with. Sure he was open minded, he had been abducted by aliens for crying out loud, but soulmates? And with an alien species?
“I am Groot?”
“I’m fine.” Peter answered. “Just shocked.”
He looked back to see Drax, Gamora and Rocket running to catch up to him. As Gamora made a move to reach out and touch Peter, Drax caught her hand with a somber expression and shook his head. She looked at him sadly and Peter wasn’t just shocked any more. He was pissed!
“Fuck you, Rona. Fuck you so very much for making friends afraid to touch me!” He grumbled with a sneer.
They all headed into a sleazy looking restaurant and gathered at the empty host’s station. There was a sign that requested they wait to be seated. Peter was grateful for the silence and he was even more grateful for the surprisingly absent emotions of Ronan the Accuser.
“So let me see if I got this straight,” Rocket snarled. “If you two hadn’t been soulmates, he’d have just been trapped in that rock forever?”
So much for that. “Sounds like it.” He said between gritted teeth. He really didn’t want to keep talking about this.
“Peter, you have to face this.” Gamora told him.
“No, actually, I don’t.” He denied. “It’s better for everyone concerned if I just ignore it. Trust me, I’m not making that psycho a body.” He paused and then snickered. “Though it would be kinda funny to make him a Xandarian body.”
“Maybe that’s the solution.” Rocket reasoned. “Make him small and weak so that he’s easy to dispose of. Then that way he dies and there’s minimal pain and damage to you.”
“Something tells me we aren’t lucky enough for it to be that simple.” Peter responded gloomily.
A host finally arrived, it was a young male Centuarian and his red eyes gleemed politely. Peter felt his chest tighten as he looked away and followed his friends to the table the blue alien led them to. They seated themselves in a quieter fashion than they normally would and he couldn’t help but wonder if it was because he was being so morose about the whole subject…
Dammit! Morose was not part of his fucking vocabulary either! Was Ronan seriously that connected to him that he could actually make him smarter by force? Well, Peter wasn’t stupid, but just…certain things weren’t a priority for him, especially having what Rocket often referred to as good vocabulistics.
“Maybe we should have stuck around old Q-Tip back there and asked if it would work.” Rocket snapped as they settled in and started looking over the menus.
“It’s not like he’d ever be foolish enough to enter a weaker form.” Peter responded and this time he could feel Ronan’s influence, which was bitter and insulted. “Besides, I doubt I can create something as complicated as a fully functioning body, so like I said earlier, I’m just gonna ignore it. Ronan is far less powerful this way and now he can’t even spook the Xandarians.”
“You should have told us that you suspected you had freed him, Peter.” Gamora lectured. “Do you realize that he could potentially use you to kill Xandarians?”
He blinked as a that presented a whole new fear he didn’t even want to think about, but as he did, he felt a little better. He recalled Ronan stumbling even in his ghost-like state when he had used Peter to fight off both Gamora and Drax. “Actually, he gets really tired when he takes control. He can only do it in short bursts.”
“So in the meantime, you slowly become an angry man who won’t let anyone touch him, who alienates his friends and family, attacks people over the smallest slight, and wants to kill any inferior race?” Gamora countered. “You won’t kill him, you won’t destroy him, you won’t release him, you’ll just become Ronan instead.”
“What the fuck do you want from me, Gamora?” Peter all but shouted as he waved his arms down toward the table in an angry manner. “Are you seriously asking me to build him a body? Because that would be the stupidest thing I could do. Not to mention it’d be completely unfair to Rocket, Drax and the Xandarians.”
“If you made him anew, it would give me the opportunity to avenge my wife and daughter.” Drax shrugged. He did not notice the flash of anger that crossed Gamora’s narrowed eyes when he mentioned his wife.
“Or be killed!” Peter frowned with genuine concern. “Even before the stone he was no laughing matter and he nearly killed you! That dude will fuck you up and I can’t lose anyone else, dammit! Not one fucking more person is allowed to die!
“I just can’t take it anymore. Not after Yondu, Groot the first, or my mom or fuck…even Ego and all my nameless siblings. Don’t get me wrong I’m glad Ego is gone but just his presence was traumatizing and I can’t do it you guys. I can’t take another loss, especially from this group, from this family right here.”
The group fell silent, unsure of what to say after Peter’s confession. Gamora felt as if she should have known that Peter wasn’t handling Yondu’s loss well. She’d seen him smile and laugh as if nothing had changed, but then she’d catch him whistling to himself. Drax may not have known how he felt about Peter being so intimately bound to the Accuser, but what he did know was that he was both saddened and grateful for Peter’s concern and fear of losing him. Rocket just wanted Ronan out of their lives and he wanted Peter’s life to not be so…tragic.
“Well, while you all eat and cry, I’m gonna go back and talk to Whitey.” Rocket announced as he jumped up from his seat.
“Jerk.” Peter tried to tease and he almost smiled when Rocket flipped him the bird.
Peter didn’t want to keep thing about everything that was making him sad. He wanted something more pleasant to dwell on. Hmm, he didn’t really use those words either; pleasant and dwell? He wondered if Ronan could be brought down by his emotions or if the Kree was just better at controlling the flow somehow.
He chuckled softly to himself as he considered that if Ronan could improve his abysmal vocabulary, then it stood to reason that Peter should be able to muck up the snobbish Kree’s. He couldn’t help his surprise when he felt a sudden rush of warmth and laughter come from Ronan. He didn’t think much about it, though. He just took the good while he could. What was it his mom always told him?
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth...