Chapter 3
The student showcase was fun. Bucky ate too much, laughed too much and maybe fell a little bit more in love with Steve. Not that he’d admit that to anyone but the blond dork was just so...nice.
They’d arrived in time to get some of the pizza and found seats in the back of the auditorium. Steve had known a few of the people there including one of his best friends, Peggy. Who he introduced Bucky to.
“Steven Rogers,” she’d said, “I thought you weren’t coming.”
“Heya Pegs,” he’d said kissing her cheek, “Change of plans. This is my friend Bucky Barnes.”
Peggy had come forward and shook Bucky’s outstretched hand. A warm smile on her red lips.
“Pleasure to meet you,” she said smiling.
Then she turned back to Steve and gave him a stern look.
“You boys behave yourselves and make sure to clap extra loud for Angie. She’s nervous,” she said.
Steve grinned then leaned down and gave her another peck on the cheek before promising to do just that. When Peggy left to return to her post at the box office Steve and Bucky sank down into their seats and began to eat.
“She’s nice,” Bucky said, “She your girl or-”
Steve chuckled and then took a big bite while shaking his head.
“Nope,” he said, “We tried that once but well, we’re better off as friends.”
“Oh,” Bucky said, trying not to sound as relieved, as he felt.
After the shows ended Bucky and Steve made their way out of the building and into the night. Bucky pulled out his phone and checked the time. It was after 11 pm and he felt his stomach drop. The library was still open but not for much longer which would mean he had to hustle to get in before the door locked and if he snuck in now he’d likely be noticed.
Steve noticed the look on the Bucky’s face but decided to wait to see if Bucky said something. They started heading down the sidewalk towards the street. Neither of them owned a car so they bypassed the parking lot and after five minutes of awkward silence Steve couldn’t take it anymore.
“Do you want me to walk you back,” he asked.
Bucky stopped on the sidewalk and gave Steve a confused look.
“What,” he asked.
“You’re going back to the library right,” Steve asked, “I can walk you back. Or my offer of the foldout is still available if you’d prefer. We’re pretty close to my place and it’s getting kind of late.”
Bucky chuckled and pushed his hair back from where it had fallen across his forehead.
“You’re not going to let this go Rogers are you,” he asked.
“Hey you can say no,” Steve said, “I am just trying to be nice.”
“ I know and honestly man I don’t get it,” Bucky said, “I’ve brought you nothing but trouble and you’re being so damn good about it. It’s not normal. You should be pissed and kicking my ass or something.”
Steve sighed and started walking back toward his apartment. Thankfully Bucky fell into step beside him.
“That’s just not me,” Steve said, “Or-Well- Okay so it used to be me. I was really angry as a kid. I got into a lot of stupid fights. If you’d pulled a stunt like the one you pulled three years ago? I definitely would’ve thrown down but I’d like to think I’ve matured some and also my ma always said that being kind to people when they’re down is the best thing a person can do. So here I am, trying to be kind. Can you just stop being a pain in the ass for five minutes and let me help you?”
They walked in silence for a few minutes and Bucky tried to come up with a suitable way of thanking Steve. The apartment was dark when they made it up the three flights of stairs and inside Steve and Sam’s two bedroom.
“I guess Sam isn’t home,” Steve said, “Not that he’d mind you being here, I just thought it would be good for him to meet you.”
Bucky was looking around the living room taking in Steve’s half finished paintings and Sam’s pile of textbooks on the coffee table. Steve went about setting up the foldout for Bucky, trying very hard not to think about the fact that he finally got Bucky to come stay the night but not for the reason he’d always wanted.
Shocked at his own wayward thoughts, Steve felt himself blush. Bucky was watching him when he straightened back to his full height, a curious lift to his eyebrows.
“You okay Stevie,” he asked, “You’re a little pink.”
‘I am not pink,” Steve lied uselessly, “I’m fine.”
He walked down the hall to get the spare pillow and blanket off his bed and was surprised when Bucky followed him.
Steve grabbed what he needed and turned to exit the room only to plow straight into Bucky who was standing in the middle of the room looking at Steve’s sketches that adorned the walls.
“Nice room,” Bucky said, “These are real nice Stevie, you do ‘em yourself?”
Steve swallowed heavily and forcefully pushed away the fantasies of Bucky and him doing something very different in this room that were burning through his head.
“Yeah,” he said softly, “That one is my ma.”
Bucky was looking at a large charcoal portrait Steve had done of Sarah his first year at college. It was a little rough in places but he thought he’d managed to capture the warmth in her eyes and the small smile she’d always worn, pretty well. Besides it was his ma, it wasn’t like he’d been able to throw it away.
“She’s real pretty,” Bucky said just as softly, “Looks like you. Bet she’s real proud.”
“I like to think she would be,” Steve said, “She passed a few years ago.”
“Shit I’m sorry pal,” Bucky said squeezing Steve’s shoulder gently.
“It’s okay,” Steve said, “I mean I still miss her but it’s nice talking about her too.”
Bucky nodded and reached for the stuff in Steve’s hands and the blond handed it over then shepherded Bucky out of his room. As they walked down the hall he pointed out the bathroom and Sam’s room.
“Don’t go in there,” Steve said.
“Why would I go in there?” Bucky asked confused.
“I don’t know. Just don’t.”
“Yes ma,” Bucky said.
“Oh my god,” Steve said exasperated, “Just shut up. Help yourself to whatever in the kitchen but double check the expiration dates. I can’t guarantee the safety of anything in there.”
Bucky laughed and Steve shrugged his shoulders then he laughed too.
“So good night,” Steve finished.
Bucky flopped down on the foldout and bit back a moan. It wasn’t a five star hotel bed but it was far better than the sleeping bag and bedroll he’d been using at the library. Steve was looking down at him strangely and Bucky realized he might not have been as successful as he’d hoped keeping his face neutral.
Desperate to alleviate the sudden awkwardness he made a joke.
“What you’re not going to tuck me in? No goodnight kiss?” he teased.
“Sure,” Steve said with a smile.
Holy shit! Bucky thought. Is he really gonna kiss me?
Steve leaned down and Bucky’s stomach quivered in anticipation as the blond got closer. His eyes were so blue and as his mouth got closer Bucky felt himself lick his lips in response.
At the last second Steve pulled the pillow out from under Bucky’s head and whacked him across the face with it.
“Goodnight jerk,” he said grinning as Bucky squawked indignantly.
He was laughing as he backed out of Bucky’s reach. The brunet was swinging the pillow wildly trying to hit Steve in retaliation.
“Good night you little punk,” Bucky said laughing, “Sleep with one eye open.”
Steve kept laughing as he waved off Bucky’s threat and walked down the hall to his room.
Once he was alone again he stopped laughing and pressed his palm to his chest feeling the racing of his heart. He’d been so close. Bucky lying there looking up at him had felt so...right. It was almost as if he’d wanted Steve to kiss him.
But that couldn’t be right. Steve thought. Could it?
Steve rubbed his eyes and refocused on getting himself ready for bed. He went to the bathroom, took out his contacts and brushed his teeth then went back into his room only shutting the door partway in case Bucky needed him.
Stripping down to just his boxers he slipped into bed and fell right to sleep.
+++++
Bucky woke up at ten minutes to seven. Just like he had every morning since he’d started sleeping at the library. For a moment he had been worried he’d be discovered and started only to get up and remember that he wasn’t in the library. He was at Steve Roger’s house. The guy he had a crush on. The guy whose reputation he’d nearly ruined just to save his own.
With an annoyed groan Bucky had gotten up and started straightening up the foldout. He was grateful for Steve’s kindness and wasn’t about to overstay his welcome.
After getting the couch in order Bucky folded the blanket and grabbed the pillow Steve had borrowed him. He was pretty sure he’d heard Steve’s alarm go off so he would just go return the bedding, say thank you and goodbye then bounce.
The school cafeteria was open really early and while the coffee they served was swill it was cheap and Bucky could sit there for the at least half of the 3 hours he had to kill before class without being harassed.
Plan in mind Bucky made his way down the hall to Steve’s room. The door was partially open and Bucky rapped his knuckles against it lightly. Steve grunted lightly which Bucky took for a sleepy come in and entered only to instantly regret it.
Steve was not awake.
No he was curled on his side, back to the door and snoring slightly fast asleep. Bucky stood frozen in the doorway unsure of what to do. He could just leave he reasoned, drop the bedding beside the bed and leave. Pretend he never glimpsed Steve’s broad shoulders lightly dusted with freckles and rippling with muscle. Ignore the firm tug of want in his chest and head to the cafeteria. On the other hand, Steve’s alarm had gone off. Bucky didn’t want the guy to oversleep and miss class especially since it was partly his fault Steve had been out late the night before.
Making up his mind to do the right thing and at least check in with Steve, Bucky approached the bed.
Don’t be weird about this he told himself sternly. Wake him up, make sure he knows the time, say thank you and leave. Don’t stare .
“Steve,” Bucky said, “Steve buddy, it’s about 7:15. Do you got class?”
Steve mumbled and flapped an arm at Bucky though whether he was shooing him away or beckoning him closer was unclear.
“Is that a yes or a no pal?” Bucky asked.
Steve grumbled again and pulled the blanket up a little higher though it dropped back down instantly. Bucky was torn between feeling fond and exasperated. The fond feeling was dangerous so he pushed it away and reached down to grip Steve’s shoulder. His firm skinned, sleep warm shoulder with its adorable freckles.
Damn it.
“C’mon Stevie just wake up for a minute,” Bucky said giving him a gentle shake.
Steve rolled over and blinked blearily up at Bucky.
“Wha-” he said, his voice hoarse with sleep, “You need me for something Buck?”
That really shouldn’t be as attractive as it is . Bucky thought.
The thoughts just fled Bucky’s head as he got a glimpse of Steve’s shirtless torso and the faint trail of blond hair below his belly button.
Please have pants on. Bucky thought hysterically.
“Um, I just wanted to,” Bucky said trying to get his thoughts together and his eyes off Steve’s abs, “Uh.”
He held up the pillow and blanket for Steve to see.
“Oh, of course Buck,” Steve said, “Plenty of room.”
Steve scooted back towards the wall leaving space in front of him on the mattress and lifted the blanket allowing Bucky to see that he wasn’t wearing pants but a pair of skimpy black boxer briefs.
I’m going to hell . Bucky thought.
“What,” Bucky asked.
“C’mon,’ Steve said wrapping his large hand around Bucky’s wrist and gently tugging, “Still time to sleep. No class for hours yet.”
His voice was still rough and his words were sliding together. Bucky realized Steve was still at least fifty percent asleep even as he spoke. Steve tugged a bit harder pulling Bucky off balance and onto the bed beside him. After arranging Bucky into being the smaller spoon Steve settled down with a sigh, then he covered them both with the large comforter before he curled his body around Bucky.
“Steve what-”
“Shhh,” Steve said his breath warm on the nape of Bucky’s neck, “Two more hours then we’ll get up.”
A heavy arm slung across Bucky’s middle and Bucky felt himself yawn.
I should get up. Bucky thought. He doesn’t know what he’s doing. I shouldn’t take advantage.
Bucky yawned again. The bed was warm and Steve’s arm around his waist was grounding in a way Bucky hadn’t realized he’d needed. Before he could get his body in motion to get out of bed he was asleep.
+++++
Steve’s alarm was a cheerful, instrumental version of “Here Comes the Sun”. Bucky rolled his eyes when he heard it.
What a dork. He thought.
Steve stretched his arm out from under the blankets to snag his phone. The motion brought him closer to Bucky who was now laying on his back staring at the ceiling. Propped up on his elbow, his upper body draped across Bucky’s Steve looked down and seemed to finally realized he wasn’t alone in the bed.
He panicked.
“What the fuck,” he whispered staring.
“Mornin pal,” Bucky said grinning, “We should probably talk.”
“Oh my god,” Steve said.
He grabbed his phone and glasses then pulled away from Bucky and sat with his back against the wall. He put his glasses on and silenced his phone before turned his horrified gaze on Bucky.
“Oh geez,” Bucky said holding up a hand, “Relax. Nothing happened.”
Steve was already blushing. The pink shade dusted his cheeks and ran down his neck and turned his chest a soft rose. Bucky tore his eyes off the sight and tried to stay calm in the face of Steve in his thick framed glasses. It was really hard because Steve looked really, really good in those glasses. Bucky swallowed heavily and looked away, forcing his eyes to roam the room and not stay glued to Steve's face the way they wanted to.
“Oh,” Steve said, “Then how did you get..well...in bed with me?”
Bucky laughed.
“That was your fault,” he said glancing at Steve.
“Excuse me?”
“It was,” Bucky said, “I heard your alarm and thought you were up so I came in to say goodbye and return your stuff but you were still snoozing. I was worried you’d overslept so I tried to wake ya and you pulled me in here with you.”
“Oh my god,” Steve said.
His skin turned even more pink and he looked down at his lap as he ran his fingers through his hair messing it up even more. After a deep breath he looked up again and gave Bucky the most apologetic look he could muster.
“I am so sorry,” he said, “I don’t remember doing that at all but honestly it doesn’t surprise me.”
“It doesn’t?”
Steve chuckled.
“I should’ve warned you,” he said, “ I am not a morning person. Like at all and sleepy Steve is a devious fucker. He is not to be trusted because he will do just about anything to get five more minutes. Including apparently dragging people into the bed with him.”
Bucky laughed and Steve laughed too.
“So yeah,” Steve said still embarrassed, “I’m sorry.”
“S’no problem Stevie,” Bucky said shrugging off the apology, “Apparently I needed the extra z’s.”
Steve smiled and then looked down at his phone. Plenty of time to dress and eat before class.
“Well okay then,” he said, “If you wanna give me a few minutes to get dressed we can go get breakfast before class.
“Yeah okay,” Bucky said sliding out of the bed.
“I’ll meet you in the living room,” Steve said.
Bucky nodded and headed out of the room closing the door behind him. Steve groaned softly and pressed his face into the bed. He wanted to die. He’d basically groped Bucky in his sleep and it clearly made the guy uncomfortable since he could barely look Steve in the eye the whole time they talked.
Great. Just when I thought things were getting better now he probably thinks I'm a creep. Steve thought.
The bed smelled like the two of them. Soap and Steve’s shampoo mixed with the minty pine smell of Bucky. It made something in Steve’s chest ache so he pushed himself out of bed and into motion. Even though he wanted to help Bucky Barnes, Steve was beginning to think that maybe it wasn’t a good idea. Not because he was a bad guy but because Steve was having a hard time not crossing the line, not wanting more. Better to cut himself off completely before he made things worse.
Dressed and ready for the day Steve walked out into the living room. Bucky was sitting on the couch, his hair falling into his eyes a little as he turned to look up at Steve.
“Ready to go pal?” Bucky asked a warm grin on his face.
I’m so fucked. Steve thought.