Abandoned

Steve nodded without looking up at Tony. 

"So, are we just going to tell everyone to climb aboard the quinjet? Hey! We're going for a ride!" Steve mocked. 

Tony glared up at him. "I think we had better at least tell Loki where we're going. He might need some time to prepare. After all, we have no idea what their relationship was like before Odin cast Jorm- Jormu- fuck it, I'm calling him 'Jor' too- out of Asgard." 

Steve started shaking his head. "No. No way. This is Thor's problem, not ours. He should be the one to tell Loki that he knew where Jörmungandr was, not us." 

Steve had already been in a match with Loki, and he didn't want to be in another one any time soon. If Natasha hadn't shown up when she did, he was sure Loki would have bested him. In fact, Loki had bested him, but thankfully neither man ever mentioned it. He didn't mention it because it was humiliating. He figured Loki didn't mention it because everyone was still pretty curious why Loki let them take him so easily. Steve had theories, but no one wanted to listen to them. 

Bucky sat in Loki's room all night even though the god finally wore himself out and fell asleep. He knew from experience that when memories and years of regret came back to haunt you, nightmares were inevitable. Bucky didn't want Loki to be alone if he woke up that way. Let the others talk. He really didn't give a damn. 

Fennie spent most of the night curled against Loki's side, apparently knowing exactly what he needed. Bucky was glad that Loki could accept her love so easily. He knew it was difficult for Loki to trust him after such a tumultuous life, so he would be whatever kind of friend Loki could allow. It had taken several years for him to reach a point where he could allow Steve to be close to him again, so he knew the process Loki had to go through. 

When Loki finally awoke, Bucky pretended to be asleep. He didn't want Loki to think he had been spying on him all night. Loki didn't want to appear weak to anyone, and he certainly wasn't. Loki was perhaps the strongest one out of all of them. Bucky had no idea how Loki lived with the thoughts that plagued him constantly. He was certain they would have driven him into madness. He wondered what his life would be like if he'd had children- children he'd known and lost. It was difficult enough remembering the lovers he'd had. Those sweet ladies who'd left the world so long ago while he remained, seemingly forever. 

"Bucky?" Loki grumbled. "What in the Nine are you still doing in here?" 

Bucky silently thanked the Nine- whatever they were- that Loki was back to his normal, pissy self. 

"Huh? Oh, sorry man...I must have passed out."

Loki shook his head in obvious irritation, and Bucky resisted the urge to smile. 

Tony and Steve had a plan, but first they needed to make sure Loki didn't actually kill his brother. Tony couldn't blame him if he did, but Steve thought they should at least try to stop him, so they stood vigil outside the door while Thor made excuses for his shitty behavior. 

While Thor was inside Loki's room, Clint joined them. He was clueless about the whole situation, so Steve tried to update him while Tony listened for anything out of the ordinary. 

"Loki is a dad?" Clint asked, much louder than he intended. 

"Shhh! He doesn't know we're out here! And yes. But, he doesn't know where any of his kids are...well, he knows where two of them are. And two of them are--deceased," Steve finished softly.

 It wasn't long before Clint felt awful about the way he'd treated Loki. Even if Loki had taken over his mind several years ago, Clint still couldn't justify treating him badly anymore. He'd spent many nights longing for his own children. Knowing he was doing the best he could to protect them wasn't enough to make up for the time he spent away from them. 

"You knew?! YOU KNEW, AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME? WHAT KIND OF BROTHER ARE YOU?" 

The three of them jumped back as something heavy crashed into the door. Steve cast a look at Tony, but Tony shook his head. 

Not yet, he mouthed. Tony had seen the kinds of fights Loki and Thor could have without either of them walking away with so much as a scratch. He wasn't concerned about Thor. He was however, very concerned about the structural integrity of the tower. 

"Loki, I... father told me not to tell you. He said you would use Jörmungandr as a weapon against the humans. He made me promise," Thor finished weakly. 

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Thor felt like an idiot. He had tried so hard to uphold everything their father had asked of him, and now he was beginning to see the cracks in the foundation. He'd known Jor as a child. Jor was a trickster like his father, but he would never actually hurt anyone. Thor wondered what had become of him now that he'd spent so much time bound to Midgard without any real interaction with anyone. After all, Jor was very intelligent. How could he be Loki's son and not be? 

Thor stared at his feet. He didn't know what to say. There was nothing he could say. He was just surprised Loki hadn't stabbed him yet. Despite the many security checks his brother went through on a daily basis, he knew Loki still had multiple daggers hidden on his person. 

Loki watched the pathetic expressions cross his brother's face. His classic good looks and puppy dog eyes weren't going to help him this time. Loki wanted nothing more than to cut Thor's throat and watch him bleed to death. How could he believe such nonsense? How could he think Loki would use his own son as cannon fodder? 

"Just because your father  wanted to use me as a political pawn doesn't mean I would do the same with my son, Thor. I am not Odin. We aren't even related, if you recall." 

Loki spat the last words at Thor like venom and stalked out of the room, almost knocking the other three men over as he left. When Thor finally emerged, no one even looked at him. 

"You are all on his side, aren't you?"

Tony's mouth fell open as he rolled his eyes. "Um, yeah. I'm afraid you fucked yourself this time, Point Break. I mean, I know Odin is called 'Allfather,' but that guy is seriously misguided."

"Don't tell him I said that though," Tony tacked on as an afterthought.

"We're leaving at three. Not sure if Reindeer Games will want you tagging along though..." 

As Thor made his way to his own room, he contemplated his options. As it turned out, he was on Loki's side too. He just couldn't bring himself to admit it yet. 

Loki sat in the corner of Stark's private library quietly holding Fennie while everyone bustled about in the common room. His jaws ached from clenching his teeth, and he could swear he'd felt his left eye twitching just moments before. He opened his hand and carefully smoothed out the crinkled paper Tony had handed him as he'd left his own room. Evidently, the metal man had known exactly how that scenario would play out. Loki silently thanked Stark for his foresight. The paper had the key code for Stark's library- his personal hiding spot- along with a note. 

 That was tough, but we're going to see your kid. We leave at three. Take as much time as you need in there. Steal my booze if you want. I will get everything in order.

-Metal Man

Loki wanted to be pissed off at Stark and everyone else just for existing at this point in time, but he found that after a few minutes his anger had passed and all he felt was sheer terror. He hadn't even laid eyes on Jor since he was a baby. He'd been so small, he could wrap around Loki's shoulders. The Aesir believed Jor was nothing more than a giant snake, but they had been so wrong. Of course, with Loki's reputation, he could never prove anything to them. 

He'd hidden Jörmungandr away the moment he was born, knowing how the Aesir would react. He'd known they would think Jor was dangerous, and he had been right. They tormented him from the moment they found out he existed. They called him an abomination, a hel-spawn, and even a monster. Loki wanted to believe that they didn't realize he knew what they were saying. He wanted to believe they didn't know his son was hurt by their words, but he knew how they were. Unfortunately, so did his son. 

Jor was smart. He spoke with Loki like any other child, albeit with a lisp. Loki could remember the sweet cooing sounds Jor made when Loki took him to the stream to play. He splashed in the water, soaking the grass around Loki's feet and laughing. Loki wondered if Jor still laughed, or if bitterness and hatred had choked the life out of him as well. 

He wondered if Jor would still remember him. Then he almost wished Jor would have forgotten. He hoped his son couldn't remember everything the way that he did. It hurt to remember everything. Loki remembered the day Odin ordered the Warriors Three to retrieve Jor. 

Loki had been in his study reading while Jor and Fenrir were outside. He could hear the two making cracks at each other; playing pranks and laughing. He'd become accustomed to hearing their unique speech, as they were quite different from anyone else in Asgard. He smiled to himself, wondering how the Norns had known what he somehow hadn't- that he would want to be a father. 

Suddenly, Fenrir's laughter turned to vicious growls, and Jor's usually lisping speech turned to squeals. Loki ran from his study to find the Warriors Three holding Fenrir down; his head shoved violently into the dirt. Loki gasped in horror as Thor dropped Jor's body into a bag that was slung over his shoulder. 

"What in the Nine is going on here? Unhand my son!" Loki yelled, pulling his dagger from its sheath. 

Lady Sif strutted forward and thrust an official document into Loki's face. 

"We were sent by the Allfather. He wishes to inspect Jörmungandr." 

He was relieved to know that Jörmungandr was still alive, especially since he couldn't hear his son's voice from outside the thick leather satchel. Loki moved to grab at Thor's shoulder, but Sif was faster. 

"He will be returned. Don't get hostile, Loki. It would be a mistake."

The threat in her voice was obvious. Her sword was dangerously close to Fenrir's throat, and Loki suddenly feared for his other son's life as well. Rather than put up a fight, he decided to follow them. 

"Fine. I shall go with you." 

Loki had known that he should be as respectful as possible, but the moment Odin made one quip about Jörmungandr being unnatural, Loki couldn't hold his tongue. It had all been over then. If he were honest with himself, it had been over already. Odin had planned every moment of that day. He'd sent Thor with the Warriors Three so Loki felt less threatened; therefore complacent. He'd deliberately made Loki angry so he had an excuse to do whatever he wanted to Jor without retribution. And when Loki flung himself at the Allfather; blood and death in his eyes, Odin had made his decision to cast the others out as well.

It was the perfect punishment for all of Loki's previous crimes. It was the perfect punishment just for existing. 

Loki had been angry with Thor for many years. He'd thought Thor had known about Odin's plans, but he knew better now. Thor was too ignorant to realize just how vengeful his father was. 

Loki pulled a bottle of Midgardian Scotch from the shelf in Stark's library. It was only noon. Perhaps if he drank everything in the room, he could be almost tipsy by three.