The Aches of Affection
That day, Sage didn’t go spend time with anyone after school. She went immediately to her room, and only came out to sit at dinner for a few minutes before going back to her room and not letting anyone in.
“JARVIS, what’s going on?”
“Miss Ahlers has asked that I not tell you, Sir.”
“She’s- damn it, JARVIS, tell me what’s happening with my daughter!”
“Truthfully, Sir, I do not know. Although she is exhibiting symptoms of what may be heartbreak.”
“Heart- Sage!”
“Anthony-”
“No, Lokes, she’s-”
“Anthony.” Loki caught the inventor by the arm and held him in place until the shorter man huffed in frustration and looked him in the eye. “She’s not ready to talk about it. If she was, she would have come to either you or me. We have to leave her alone until she is ready to talk.”
Tony glared at him. “Fine. But I’m not letting this continue tomorrow.”
---
Sage woke up, sick to her stomach, eyes still raw from crying. She didn’t want to go to school, but if she didn’t, Tony and Loki would want to know why, and then Tony would probably want to go and confront Adeline, and she couldn’t let that happen. Not when this was her fault.
She’d been mostly kidding about being offended. It had hurt, a little bit, but for the most part, she’d just been screwing around. And she certainly hadn’t intended to insinuate that she didn’t think she and Adeline weren’t really dating. She did! She’d just meant if they were older and dating in the “real world” like the adults tended to call it-
No. That sounded worse. Was she going to try to apologise today? She had to, didn’t she? It was her fault. Because first she’d been sick, and then she’d pretended to be upset, and then she’d said that...
God. She’d fucked up. Big time. How was she going to fix this? “I’m sorry I said our relationship isn’t real, it’s just that until we’re adults who actually know what we’re doing, I don’t think it qualifies because we can’t get married?” That’s bullshit. And not true. And not an apology.
God.
---
“Hey, Addy, um-”
“Don’t call me that.”
Sage barely resisted the urge to cringe away from the venom in Adeline’s tone. “A-Adeline, I-”
“Stop talking to me.”
Sage’s throat tightened and she fought back tears. “B-but-”
“I’m not talking to you. I’m trying to focus on my schoolwork. I don’t have time for fake relationships.”
“O-okay, that’s f-fair. You have every right to say that, but can I please-”
Adeline whipped her head around, glaring at Sage with eyes full of hatred. “Ahlers. I told you to stop talking to me. Now quit or I’m going to move.”
Sage tried to swallow around the huge lump now residing in her throat and nodded mutely, looking down at the paper in front of her, trying to read it even as her vision blurred with tears.
Sage managed to make it through the rest of the day mostly without crying. Mostly. Chemistry was… difficult. But as soon as she got into the elevator at the tower, the floodgates opened. She asked JARVIS to take her to their floor, blubbering so hard she was honestly surprised that the AI knew what she’d said.
Loki looked up when the door to his study swung open, silently watching as Sage made a beeline for the couch, collapsing on it and sobbing harder. He pursed his lips, wondering to himself how she’d made it across their floor to get to him and magicked up a pot of tea. He poured some into one of the mugs that he kept around for specifically this reason and went to sit beside her, setting the mug down on the coffee table and stroking her hair gently, He waited until her heart-wrenching sobs quieted to sniffles and hiccups before gently lifting her to sit up more while simultaneously leaning her against him, picking up the tea that he’d been making sure wasn’t cooling and offering it to her. “Talk to me, darling. Why are you hurting like this?”
“I- I- I-” More tears pooled in her eyes, and she quickly took a sip of tea.
“It’s alright. You can tell me, I promise. Please, darling.”
Sage sniffled and wiped desperately at her eyes. “Addy and I had a fight. And- and- I- it was my fault, and- I-”
“Shh, shh, shh. Slowly. Drink your tea. It’s alright. Take your time.”
She swallowed some of the tea, and made a little face. “You d-don’t drink this with a-as much sugar as I do.”
He laughed softly and spelled more sugar in. “Try it again.”
“B-better.” She blew out a heavy breath, smiling when he handed her a box of tissues. “S-so yesterday. I got back to school after being out sick, and Addy greeted me at the door. It was- it was great.” Her eyes started swimming again and she grabbed a tissue, taking a quick drink. “And then she made some comment about me being sassy and small, I don’t even know anymore. It was- dammit, it was so dumb! God.”
“Shh, my love. It’s okay. Just tell me. Most things seem ill advised in hindsight, but that does not change them.”
“I- I know. Okay. God. I’m such a fucking mess. Anyway. I- I pretended that I was mad, and so I stormed off and I kind of didn’t talk to her until lunch, which was fucking stupid but whatever. A-and then, at lunch, I told her I was mad because she called me short, which I kind of was, but not like I was pretending to be. And then she said something about how she’d missed me because I’d been gone for two days, which was goddamn understandable, I don’t know why-”
“Darling.’
“Right. Sorry. Fuck. So, a-after she said that, I- I fucking- I said ‘well, if we were really dating, you’d have to wait longer than that to see me.’ I- God!”
Loki sucked in a sharp breath beside her. ”Darling.”
“I know!” This started the tears again, and Sage set down her mug, pulling her knees to her chest and sobbing into them. “I f-fucked up, P-Papa. I fucked up, and she’s p-pissed off at me, and I d-don’t blame her! I d-didn’t mean it like, that b-but I don’t even know what I did m-mean! She w-won’t even t-talk to me or let me c-call her Addy anymore! I don’t know how to a-apologise or how to f-fix this!”
“Oh, my sweet Sage.” He sighed and pulled her into his chest, pressing a kiss to her hair. “You have to try, my darling. Don’t give up until you’ve gotten her to listen. You’ve hurt her, love. She’s not going to forgive that easily, especially if she loves you as much as you do her.”
Sage scoffed, her head buried in his chest. “She doesn’t- w-wait. Love?” She turned wide green eyes up at him. “I- I don’t-”
“Shhh, darling. That’s a discussion for another day. You’ve got to apologise. If she won’t let you do it in person, then sent her a text message, but do it properly, do you hear me? Flowers, chocolate, show her that you mean it. Show her that you’re genuine. After that, it is no longer on you, do you understand me?”
Sage nodded pitifully against his chest. “Do you think she’ll ever forgive me?” She whispered, refusing to make eye contact in case he felt like she did.
Loki sighed again. “I think you’ve just had your first lovers’ spat and you’re both heartbroken. I think you’re young and that you’ll heal, but that you need to give each other time and learn from this. I think you need to tell that girl that you love her, and once you’ve gotten her back, kiss her for all you’re worth, because you won’t be young forever, and not every relationship you have will be like this. I think that you need to mark this feeling. Keep it hidden deep inside you somewhere so that you have something to compare all your other heartbreaks to, but deep enough that it won’t affect you all the time. Does that make sense, darling?”
She nodded again, thinking that statement over, continuously flipping it over and over in her mind.
Loki really wasn’t surprised when Sage fell asleep on him ten minutes later. It had clearly been an emotional day for the poor girl, physically, mentally, and emotionally. She deserved the rest. He’d wake her for dinner.