Chapter 10
The champagne did little to improve your mood as you watched the groom twirl his new bride around the dance floor. Only two hours earlier, you had served as Clint’s “best man” while he married the now Mrs. Laura Barton. It was your job to always have his back, and no matter how much it pained you to do it, you weren’t going to let him down. You had stood by his side and watched as the man you loved most in the world promised to love someone else for the rest of his days.
As you sat at the small reception, tracing the top of the champagne flute with your fingertip, you tried to keep your attention on anything but the happy couple in front of you. In the months since you’d met Laura, you still hadn’t managed to work out your feelings for your best friend. You had never really thought about the two of you being together romantically, but it also bothered you immensely to see them so in love. Even though you knew it was a bad idea, you couldn’t help but glance up at the pair of them. Your thoughts wandered to how handsome Clint looked in his tuxedo up until the moment that he pulled her close and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. With that, you gulped down the rest of your drink and managed to slip out of the party and to your car without anyone noticing.
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Knocking on the apartment door, it suddenly occurred to you that it would have been wiser and more polite if you had called in advance. Before you could change your mind, however, the door opened to reveal a very familiar face. He looked slightly disheveled with his hair standing up in multiple directions and it seemed as if you had woken him from a deep sleep.
“Hey Everett,” you said, “Is this a bad time?”
“Of course not, y/n,” he said, rubbing his eyes before running his hand through his hair. “Just having a hard time adjusting to being back in this time zone. Come in,” he added, moving to give you room to enter.
He hadn’t been living in this particular apartment long and it was your first time seeing it from the inside. It was a step up from his previous one, with lots of glass windows that gave you a view of the city at night.
“Your promotion must have come with a decent pay raise. This is a nice place,” you said.
“Thanks. I’m glad you like it.” A few moments of silence passed before he added, “you look…wonderful. What’s the occasion?”
“A wedding,” you answered, sitting down on the couch and slipping off your heels.
“Anyone I know?” He asked, moving to sit beside you.
You hesitated to answer him for a variety of reasons. Firstly, no one outside of Clint’s and Laura’s families knew about the marriage except for you and Fury. It was important to Clint that it be kept a secret from the rest of SHIELD. Secondly, you weren’t sure you were ready to discuss your feelings with anyone.
“Y/n, you okay?” Everett asked, looking at you with a concerned expression.
Finally, you decided that Everett wouldn’t spill what you told him in confidence, and if you hadn’t wanted to talk about it, you would have gone home to an empty house.
“Clint’s…it was Clint’s wedding.”
“To someone besides you?” He asked with a strange tone in his voice.
“Do I look like I’m wearing a wedding gown, Ev?” You replied with a humorless laugh.
When you saw the look on his face, you said “I’m sorry. It’s been a weird few months.”
“It’s okay.” After awhile he added, “How do you feel about it?”
“I honestly don’t know. I’ve never thought about Clint that way, but I can’t stand the sight of them together. When I stood up there and watched them get married, I felt more alone than I have ever felt in my life. I can’t even use the excuse of hating her, because I don’t. She really is a great girl. I don’t know if I’ve fallen in love with him, or if I’m just a selfish bitch who can’t share.”
He must not have known what to say because he simply reached over and took ahold of one of your hands. You turned to look at him and started to study his face. In the years since Everett had moved out, you hadn’t seen him as much as you would’ve liked and he had changed some from the mental image you had of him. The passing of time showed on his features, but in his case it actually suited him and made him look more attractive. As your eyes travelled up to his currently messy hair, you smiled as you noticed the increased numbers of gray strands that you had joked about so long ago.
Apparently noticing your smile, he gave you one of his own before asking “what is it?”
His smile was everything you had always remembered it to be…powerful, captivating, and easily his best feature.
“Nothing,” you said, still staring at him. You suddenly became aware of a strange urge to be much closer to him. But before you could act on it, you were distracted by the sound of your cell phone ringing in your purse.
“Excuse me a minute,” you said, pulling your phone out and seeing the number you knew by heart on the caller ID.
When you flipped it open and put it to your ear, you heard your favorite words come drifting out, “Hey baby.”
“Hey Clint.”
“You okay? You took off in the middle of everything.”
“Yeah, I just felt kind of weird being there alone…you know what I mean,” you sort of lied.
“Yeah. There’s been something I’ve been meaning to tell you ever since Laura and I got engaged, but I never knew how to put it into words. When I looked around for you at the reception and couldn’t find you, I finally figured out what it was I needed to say: She’s never going to take your place, y/n. No one ever could. I hope you know that.”
You desperately tried to swallow your emotions before saying, “I know, Clint. You better go now. I don’t want you getting in trouble on your own honeymoon.”
“Alright, partner, I’ll see you as soon as I get back. Be good while I’m gone. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
When you hung up the phone, you were conscious of Everett watching you.
“What did he say?” He asked.
“Exactly what I needed to hear.”