Babysitting Groot
“Come on, y/n, it’s just one night for a few hours. Besides, you owe me a favor,” Peter Quill said in a hushed voice so no one else would hear him. “I want to take Gamora out and show her a real Earth date.”
“I don’t know, Quill. What about Drax, or Mantis, or Rocket? I thought he and Rocket spent all their time together. Where are they and why can’t they do it?”
“Rocket and Drax are busy doing...I don’t know what. I prefer not to ask in case it’s something I don’t want to have to deal with, and Mantis spends all her time following that Barnes guy around now. She likes poking him on the arm. Apparently, he’s emotionally complicated or some crap like that. I think it freaks him out, but whatever. I just need you to do me this one solid. Look at him,” Quill said, grabbing you on the arm and guiding you over to a spot where you could see Groot sitting on the couch, “all he does is play that stupid game. He won’t be any trouble.”
“Fine, Peter, I’ll do it.”
“Yes! You’re a lifesaver.”
“Uh huh, have fun,” you said as you watched him run out the door. Walking over to the couch, you stood in front of Groot and addressed him, “Groot, I’m supposed to be looking after you while the other Guardians are gone. Is there anything you need or want?”
No response.
“Ok, well, just let me know if that changes then.”
Turning to walk away, you heard him say, “I am Groot.”
“What?”
“I am Groot. I am Groot!” he said over and over, each time sounding more upset than the time before.
“I don’t know what you’re trying to tell me!”
“I am Groot!!”
“Thor...Thor will know. Wait right here. I’ll be right back,” you said, hurrying towards the door. In the hallway, you ran into Peter Parker.
“Peter, have you seen Thor?”
“Yeah, I think he’s in the weight room. Is something wrong?”
“I’m supposed to be babysitting Groot, but he’s all upset about something and I don’t know what it is. Would you keep an eye on him until I get back?”
“Sure.”
You found Thor in the weight room bench pressing, using one of the large pieces of equipment as his weight. When he heard the urgency in your voice, he tossed it loudly on the ground beside him.
“Y/n, what’s wrong?”
“You speak Groot, right?”
“Yes, they taught it on Asgard. It was an elective.”
The mental image of Thor squeezed into a tiny school desk taking a Groot vocabulary quiz suddenly popped into your mind.
“Um, he’s very upset about something and I don’t know what it is. Would you please come translate?”
“Of course.”
The two of you arrived back in the living room to find it empty.
“Shit,” you muttered. “Where could he have gone? I told Peter to keep an eye on him.”
“Y/n!” You heard Thor call out from where he had wandered off. “Over here!”
You rushed over to find Peter and Groot in another room playing the PS4.
“No, you want to use the X button for that,” Peter said.
“I am Groot.”
“Yeah, just like that.”
“I didn’t know the child spoke Groot,” Thor said.
“He doesn’t. However, he is fluent in teenage boy.”
“Hey, y/n,” Peter began, “I figured out what was wrong. The batteries in that old school game of his died, so I thought he’d get a kick out of this.”
“You did good, Pete,” you replied, patting him on the shoulder. After a few moments, you got an idea.
“Is that at a place where you can turn it off?” you asked him.
“Sure. Why? What’s up?”
“I am Groot.”
“We’re going to take a little field trip. Bring the system.”
Five minutes later, you punched in your security code and opened the door.
“I’ve never been to this part of the compound,” Peter said. “Are we allowed in here?”
“It’s a Friday night. No one is going to be around to care. Give me the system.”
You connected all the wires, pressed a few buttons, and their game was up on Fury’s giant command center screen. It covered one entire wall of the room and was truly a sight to behold.
“Woah,” Peter said, staring with his eyes as wide as saucers.
“I am Groot,” Groot added.
As they seated themselves on the floor and started playing, you asked, “Would you boys like anything to eat?”
“Pizza!” Peter blurted out. “If It isn’t too much trouble.”
“Groot, would pizza be okay?”
“I am Groot,” he said with a smile while shaking his head up and down.
“I don’t think I need Thor to translate that one,” you said.
As you left the room, you heard another “I am Groot.”
“Yeah, she’s really cool. You’ll like her.”
Smiling to yourself, you decided that the next time either of them needed watching, you’d happily volunteer.