Under Pressure

When Shuri shows up on his doorstep wearing an ‘I heart NY’ sweatshirt Tony sighs. “Please tell me T’Challa knows where you are,” he says.

Shuri shrugs, “he’s aware enough,” she says and that really doesn’t make him feel better about things.

“Kid, you need to tell him where you are before he shows back up here and re-bugs my living room and then complains about my sex life like it wasn’t his fault he had to deal with it to begin with,” he says. “But I’m guessing you’re here for a reason.”

She nods and walks in when he moves aside for her. “Yes- I finally got around to looking up those children that went missing. They are real, but they went missing ages ago so I don’t see how they’re relevant,” she says.

Tony frowns because he’s run five different searches and found nothing of use. “Show me what you have,” he says and Shuri shrugs, pulling a laptop out of her bag.

“From what I gathered, and I’ll warn you that it isn’t much, these kids went missing as early as 1928 and as late as 1952, and none of them are on any kind of record for long,” she says, pulling up a few files. Most of them were bare bones as far as information went and even then Shuri’s findings were mostly circumstantial, but when she gets to the last kid- the one that went missing in 1928- Tony frowns.

“That can’t be right,” he says, nodding at the last piece of evidence Shuri had of her existence.

“I verified the information, thank you,” she says in an offended tone.

“No, you don’t get it, that’s Natasha standing beside her. Younger obviously, probably in her early teens, but that’s her. I thought you said this one was born in the late twenties,” he says.

“She was, this was taken in 1942. It’s the last time she’s on any kind of record anywhere. I couldn’t even find a death date,” she says.

“Your information has to be wrong- I’m telling you that’s Natasha standing next to her.” And Natasha wasn’t as old as Cap- her birthdate wasn’t too long after his own or so she told him. Or maybe that’s what she was led to believe or something. Or hell, SHIELD could have told her to keep that information to herself, but then why would she have reacted so strangely to missing kids when she knew at least one of them? No, something was going on here.

“My information is not incorrect, I checked things over several times and that was before I spent a stupid amount of time trying to find out where these children ended up. Which I found nothing,” she adds.

Yeah, so did Tony in regards to that, but whatever programs Shuri was running must be better than his own given that she found information no matter how bare it is. “Okay, you know what, I think we need to look up Natasha because there shouldn’t be a record of her in the early forties let alone one that suggests she’s in her early teens. Follow me,” he tells her, turning to go to his lab.

*

Shuri watches as Tony works, finding a shocking amount of information on Natasha Romanov, but the speed at which he determines its useless or not is more than a little impressive. She spent much more time on her own information but Tony seems to be able to figure out how reliable something was far faster than she could.

“How are you doing that?” she asks after some time. She had started going through his discarded sources, positive that he was missing something but her reading was useless because Tony had been right to throw out what he did.

“Knowledge of American media, American spy systems, and the American military and all their operations. It probably takes you longer because you don’t know what would and wouldn’t be a reliable source here immediately. Stuff from other countries takes me longer too though, so its not just you. If you want though you can go through all this stuff- there’s a lot of HYDRA information that someone needs to go through and you probably wouldn’t want to read through that,” he says, waving a hand and bringing up another set of screens and pushing the ones that were previously in front of him over.

She raises an eyebrow, wondering where these things were stored when Tony wasn’t waving them in and out of existence. They appeared all over the lab so she wondered what kind of systems he had set up to do that. Her own designs were segregated to specific areas. She’d ask later though, when she had gone through the files in front of her. She pulls them towards her, surprised when the files do her bidding, and pulls up the first thing in the pile.

The information was mostly useless but she does find a few intriguing things regarding the US military that she files away for later use. She never knew when that information might be useful to her later. Tony flicks through the HYDRA files just as fast as he went through everything else and out of curiosity she catches one he the files he flicks aside, surprised when the file stops and comes towards her. She really wanted to know how to do that.

“You aren’t going to want to read that,” Tony says quickly but he doesn’t reach out and take the file back like T’Challa would.

“It can’t be that bad,” she says.

Tony raises an eyebrow, “Wakanda can’t possibly be ignorant to World Ward Two- Nazis were hardly nice people, Shuri. You’re not going to want to read that, especially since it’s useless,” he says.

“Obviously we know about World Ward Two- Nazis kept trying to invade the country to steal vibranium, convinced it would unlock psychic powers or something. Honestly they were all crazy, and then in the fifties with the weird amount of red heads,” she shakes her head. “But I thought this was an offshoot of Nazis, not actual Nazis.” Or that was how the American media portrayed them when they weren’t either ignoring them and occasionally condemning them.

“Don’t let people fool you- they might have tried to rebrand themselves but if it walks like a Nazi and talks like a Nazi, it’s a Nazi. And these files are from when they were Nazis anyways. So do yourself a favor and throw that out,” he says, gesturing to the file that was still at her fingertips.

“Fine,” she says and flicks it away. “Is there anything useful in those files because most of what I’ve found out from mine were about you technically committing treason by giving me classified information,” she says.

Tony shrugs, “you think you can do anything useful with the knowledge of Rhodey’s random exploits with missing tanks?” he asks, smiling.

“You already went through the files,” she states more than asks.

He nods, “but having more than one person look at information that could be useful sometimes gets results. Guess you didn’t find anything of use?” he asks and she shakes her head.

“Not so far,” she tells him, calling up another file.

*

Tony watches as Bucky toys with his phone, enthused with Snap Chat not that Tony really used it much if ever. He was more fond of Twitter and Instagram as far as social media went but Bucky seemed to be having fun so he didn’t really care. His story had to be looking pretty weird by now but he figures that’ll make for some interesting headlines tomorrow.

“I don’t know why you don’t like this app, I think its fun,” Bucky says, taking what had to be the five hundredth picture that day.

“It just doesn’t appeal to me. But sometimes if I’m bored I’ll snap random fans because they always fall over themselves when they get a personal snap chat from me and I find it amusing,” he says. One man sent him back five straight snaps of him crying at his camera, which was fun. Mostly he got a lot of screaming though.

“Pepper has banned me from sending her snaps,” Bucky informs him sadly and Tony throws back his head and laughs.

“Sounds like her. Want food? Because I’m hungry,” he says.

Bucky perks up, “can I make something? I was looking up recipes online earlier. Also you can order food online? Like I don’t have to talk to a human or wear pants?” he asks, looking too excited for his own good.

Tony starts laughing again. “Yeah, Bucky, the future means minimal human contact if you want it that way,” he says. Bucky looks downright enthused with this and Tony shakes his head at him fondly. Unlike Steve Bucky was curious about things, and eager to find some kind of place in his new surroundings. It was too bad Steve was so intent on staying in his past, Tony thinks, because Bucky would probably actually be good for him. Steve was reluctant to live in the future and Bucky was full steam ahead- if things were different Bucky would probably do wonders to reintegrate Steve back into daily life.

“The future is awesome,” Bucky says, grinning at him over the arm of the couch. “But before we get to the food, what are you avoiding telling me? FRIDAY says Steve has stopped calling and so I can’t imagine its that,” he says.

Yeah, but Tony was sure that meant drastic measures were coming but he didn’t really want to burst Bucky’s bubble. He seemed… happier, freer or maybe that was Tony assuming things based on his own perspective. Regardless he should probably mention Yasha… He sighs, “you know what, video worked last time,” he mumbles more to himself than Bucky but with his superior hearing Bucky hears anyways.

He tilts his head to the side and waits for Tony to find the right section of video to show him. “Where exactly are your cameras? Because they seem to be everywhere,” Bucky says.

“They are. I can disable the ones in your space if you want though- the ones in your room are disabled already,” he says distractedly, trying to find the right time of day. Yasha and Bucky seemed to change a lot more frequently now and Tony wonders if there’s a reason but truthfully he had no idea. He wasn’t even sure they had any idea.

“You’d do that?” Bucky asks, obviously surprised.

Tony looks up and frowns at Bucky’s obvious shock, “yeah, I would. Why do you look so surprised?” It wasn’t like Steve had a bunch of contraptions around that intellectually inferior people would call Orwellian. He just felt more comfortable with this technology around him, that didn’t mean he was living in a fucking dystopian novel. Honestly his idea of a dystopia was living with nothing but candles and quills like the Luddites wanted.

“You just seem so… attached to your stuff I guess. I didn’t think you’d give that up,” Bucky says.

“I’m not, I’m just giving you whatever privacy you want,” he says, smiling when he finally finds the right part of the video. “Here,” he tells Bucky, handing over the tablet so he could watch for himself. It was easier to do that than explain what the situation was.

As Bucky watches the video Tony goes to make himself busy elsewhere, giving him room to process his other personality’s request. God knew Tony would want it in his situation. Hell, he could take time to process what the hell was going on in his mind on his own now and he didn’t even have to deal with a whole other person in there. He’s considering rearranging some plants when Bucky finds him.

“He seems… attached to you,” he says softly.

Tony sighs, “he is.” There was no getting around that as much as Tony wanted to. Or maybe didn’t want to, he wasn’t really sure these days.

“And what about you?” Bucky asks, head tilted to the side.

“What about me?” Tony asks back.

“I mean how do you feel. You kind of gave mixed signals in the video,” he says, looking down at the tablet in his hands.

He opens his mouth to say it didn’t matter but he damn well knows it does. “I don’t know, I thought he was you but it turns out you’re you and… my relationship status always has to be needlessly complicated, doesn’t it?” he mumbles more to himself than Bucky.

“I guess maybe you should think about whether or not that affects how you feel about him. And you feel something, I can see it every time you look at me like you miss him,” Bucky tells him. Tony frowns and Bucky lets out a soft laugh, “you like me well enough, but that’s because you pity me and you find my curiosity intriguing. You don’t look at him like that, like he’s a child who’s learning and you’re amused by it. Don’t look so upset, I get it.”

It hadn’t been his intention to make Bucky feel like a child- he just found is attempts to figure out anything beyond the basics of how to use technology amusing. But he guesses he can see how that would be taken from Bucky’s point of view. “That’s not… I don’t know how to feel at the moment; I’m still trying to figure this out. And I don’t think you’re anything like a child, more like someone who just got thrown into what must feel like a sci-fi film and you’re trying to figure out the rules of your new world. The way you explore your surroundings is what I sort wished I saw out of Steve but instead he… didn’t really take being here very well.” Unlike Bucky he didn’t explore the future more than he had to, only engaging with new things when it was necessary for him to. Bucky spent most of his time asking questions and trying to figure out how to use random things around Tony’s penthouse.

Bucky considers this for a moment before he smiles, “so your amusement isn’t some kind of misguided pity?” he asks, head tilted to the side.

Tony shakes his head, “no, its not. Its more like I appreciate anyone who appreciates technology- most people tend to fear it instead of embracing it.” Just look at all of those stupid movies about robots taking over the world, though after Ultron they sort of had more value. But before that Tony found them absolutely absurd and without a space rock Ultron wasn’t even possible so. Aliens, in his not at all biased opinion, were a lot more fearsome than murder bots.

“So I’ve noticed- Ultron seemed to freak people out. Still, figure out how you feel about Yasha and once you do take it up with him. Ultimately its not my relationship,” he says, shrugging.

“Its still your body too,” Tony points out.

“I know, and if something he does affects the way I live then fine, but I can’t say he can’t have a relationship because I’m in my head too. I don’t get that right and neither does he,” Bucky says. “So when you figure things out, talk to him.”

*

When Bucky left Steve didn’t think he wouldn’t come back. Sure he was upset but Bucky always came back. Actually Bucky never really left but that was besides the point- this time he left and he didn’t come back and Steve tried calling to at least make sure he was okay but Tony eventually blocked the damn calls. So he waited a couple days because maybe Bucky needed space and Steve could do that, really, but it’s been more than a week and how much space could he possibly need? It wasn’t like he wanted to deal with Tony- he had enough problems dealing with his best friend who seemed intent on fighting his every suggestion for the Accords but if Bucky wasn’t going to call, or if Tony wasn’t letting him, then he needed to know what was going on.

He almost doesn’t expect Tony to let him in but he does and Steve isn’t about to question it so he hops in the elevator before Tony changes his mind and he has to do something stupid. When the doors open to Tony’s penthouse Bucky is standing there and sighs in relief, immediately going over to him. Bucky takes a step back and Steve swears he feels his heart get stabbed, “Bucky…” he says softly.

Bucky looks away, “Steve,” he says, tone just as soft. “I’ve got a lot going on right now.”

“I know,” Steve says, “I’m probably the only one who knows what you’re feeling right now.” Being shot seventy years into the future with no idea what was going on an all these expectations on you wasn’t easy. He knew that better than anyone in a very literal sense what that was like and Bucky needed, someone who understood.

His response earns him a sharp laugh though, “you don’t know anything,” Bucky says, shaking his head.

Steve frowns, “Bucky, I’m literally the only other person currently alive who knows what you’re going through,” he points out.

“No, you don’t. What you know isn’t anything like what I’m going through Steve and… I’m tired of pretending it is,” he says, shaking his head.

“What, did Tony tell you that?” he asks, rolling his eyes. Of course Tony would claim they were going through something totally different like he had any experience with either of their life circumstances. Why Bucky was buying it, though, was something of a mystery.

“No, Tony didn’t tell me that, common sense did Steve. You went down on a plane and woke up seventy years later. I fell off a train, lost an arm, had an incredibly violent surgery that replaced said arm, got tortured for six straight months until there wasn’t much of me left at all, and then got used as a weapon HYDRA froze when I was inconvenient for them. By the time I woke back up myself I lived entire lifetimes that you could never understand,” Bucky says, shaking his head.

“Then let me try,” Steve says quickly, stepping forward. Bucky sighs and takes a small step back, leaning away and Steve clenches his jaw but he doesn’t say anything. Whatever was going on he could fix this; it was Bucky he was talking to. Even when he had nothing he had Bucky, and Bucky had him too. That would never change.

Bucky tilts his head back and sighs, “Steve, there is no amount of empathy that you could lend this situation that would allow you to understand. I’m not saying that because I don’t think you won’t try in your own way, I’m saying that because understanding isn’t possible. I don’t understand what happened to me, no one else will either,” he says. “And beyond that I’m different now, so are you, and I don’t think we’re compatible anymore.”

He takes a step forward, extending his hand to touch Bucky because he had to understand that this was ridiculous- of course they were different people but they’d always be compatible. They’ve always worked well together, always would. Bucky takes another step back though and he sighs, “I’m just trying to get you to understand-”

“So am I Steve- whatever we had is gone and I don’t think its going to come back unless both of us take time to figure out our lives,” he says.

“And what’s wrong with figuring things out together Bucky, I thought we were doing okay,” he says. Until Tony had to go and screw it up somehow they were happy, content. It had been nice to be wrapped up in their own world, it felt like home and he wanted that back.

Bucky tries to take another step back but he hits the wall behind him and gives it a slightly panicked look over his shoulder before his jaw clenches and he turns back around. “We tried that Steve, and we ended up here so that’s not going to work. I’m sorry but we’re done.”

“Bucky,” he says, leaning forward a little until he hears footsteps and turns to find Tony standing there with his arms crossed over his chest. Out of the corner of his eye he sees Bucky frown and that doesn’t bode well. “What do you want?” he asks, eyes narrowing.

“For you to get out of my house. Bucky was nice enough to let you in and he’s told you you’re done so leave. ‘I’m over you’ isn’t a negotiation point it’s the end of your relationship so go,” he says.

Steve raises an eyebrow, “oh like you’re the authority on relationships,” he says, scoffing.

“You’re right, I’m not exactly an expert on what makes a great long term relationship. Probably why I know yours is pooched,” Tony shoots back. He doesn’t even realize he’s stepped forward until Bucky grabs his arm, pulling him back a little.

“Steve, its his house,” Bucky says softly.

“And we aren’t done talking,” he says back. “He doesn’t get to cut our conversation short just because he doesn’t want me here.”

“Bucky can leave with you if he wants, just get out of my house,” Tony says, rolling his eyes.

He opens his mouth to say something but Bucky cuts him off, “look, I’ll go because I have a few more things to say, but its Tony’s house so you can’t really stay here if he doesn’t want you here,” Bucky tells him, wincing a little as he says it. Probably because he was too nice to tell Tony to stuff it but he’s always been the nicer one out of the two.

Tony’s eyes flick back and forth between him and Steve before he licks his lips and sighs, “I uh, was going to wait but now seems like a good time to give you this,” Tony says, walking a few steps forward and handing a phone over. Steve frowns at it as Bucky enthusiastically takes the device, grinning. “I couldn’t let you keep monopolizing my phone, Pepper has reliably informed me that I can’t keep redirecting my calls,” Tony says, smiling. “Call if you need anything.”

“He won’t,” Steve says and Bucky sighs.

“I’ll be back,” Bucky tells Tony, pushing Steve towards the elevator before he has time to say something. Namely that he would not be back because whatever was happening here wasn’t going to continue. Whatever this was Bucky didn’t have to stay in it and Steve would make sure he knew that.

*

Steve wasn’t getting it. Actually no, he was refusing to get it and that sounded odd in Bucky’s mind, which made him wonder if the thought was someone else’s no matter how true it was but he’s never been aware of Yasha before so why would he be now? But it would make sense as to why his patience was thinning. Steve has been… pleasant almost, and mostly not domineering, but he was refusing to accept that this relationship was over and…

And tell him you slept with Tony you stupid fuck- hit him where it hurts.

Bucky can’t help but jump a little, breaking attention away from Steve fourth mini rant on their history and his love for Bucky- something he didn’t actually doubt- but that wasn’t the problem. The problem was that he loved Bucky so much he seemed damn intent on making sure he was the only thing Bucky had to love back. Steve frowns at him, noticing the difference in behavior right away and Bucky shakes his head, knowing that apparently this was… contact, he guessed, with his other… personality. And he so wasn’t taking that terrible advice either. He had other methods of getting Steve to realize that he was way too far gone to be in a relationship with anyone let alone Bucky.

“So you say you love me,” he starts but Steve jumps in before he can finish.

“I do, and whatever is wrong we can fix it. We’ve always managed,” Steve says softly.

So he’s been reminded several times. “Okay then, give up Captain America, all of it,” he says.

Steve all but leaps forward, pressing his hands to the sides of Bucky’s face, “I’ll do it,” he says immediately. Bucky shakes his head to free himself from Steve’s grip and sighs.

“Do you not see how insane that is?” he asks. “You can’t just give up everything you are for someone- that’s not love. Its creepy and weird and not at all sustainable. You can’t be willing to throw your personhood away for a relationship, Steve. Get yourself together,” Bucky tells him, shaking his head.

“Captain America isn’t who I am,” Steve says, frowning.

“It wasn’t who you were, but it is who you’ve become. And even if you’re right the fact that you’re apparently willing to throw away a huge part of your life for me is messed up. You never would have done this in Brooklyn, Steve. You probably would have told me off and called me a selfish asshole, which would be warranted,” he says. Whoever Steve used to be that person was gone, and so was the person Bucky used to be. Hell, he was so gone there was an entire other person in his head. And he had no idea what was going on with Steve and he didn’t think Steve knew either. But he wasn’t willing to stick around to find out either so he turns to walk away but Steve grabs his arm.

“Bucky,” he says in a somewhat desperate tone, grip tightening a little on his arm when he goes to pull away. “Bucky,” he says again, this time in a more level tone. “We can work this out.”

For a half a second he considers his options before he makes his decision. “No we can’t, I slept with Tony and we’re together now and um. I like him better than you,” he says, pulling his arm from Steve’s grasp and scuttling off while Steve struggled to process that.

Well done that stupid voice in his head says and Bucky really hoped Tony was serious about his penthouse being able to withstand super soldiers because he just might have to deal with one.