Rough Times

Peter had never lived anywhere outside of a big city before.

He imagined, if he could hear, that he would hear bugs buzzing and the wind, on hot days the sear the sun left and the rustling of the crops around him.

Sometimes he would try to hear, standing still and straining as hard as he could. His face would scrunch up and his arms would shake with the effort, as if if he just tried harder that his hearing would magically come back, that it was his fault that it left in the first place - which it was, Peter accepted that even if Tony told him otherwise.

And sometimes Tony would find him like that, shaking and face red from exertion. He would rush over, sign for Peter to stop you're going to hurt yourself, it's not going to WORK so Peter would stop, tears pricking his eyes from the effort and failure. Tony would pull him into a hug, pulling back only to sign to him that he would hear again one day, that Tony was so close to fixing the external device.

Somehow Peter never believed him.

~~~~
Before

It had taken a few days for Peter to work up the nerve to go see his aunt May. Tony knew it wasn't that he didn't want to, but more based in the fear of actually seeing his aunt laying there, still and quiet in a hospital bed.

Tony also wondered if some part of Peter wished the woman was dead already, so that he didn't have to deal with the guilt of knowing at some point she would be taken off of life support. Tony didn't really know what he himself felt about that.

Mostly he just felt like he was stealing May’s nephew from her. And was it right, ethically and morally right to even take her off of life support? What if they told Tony that he could use his own money to keep her alive? What would he even fucking say to something like that?

What would Peter say?

It was just the type of dilemma that Tony knew was facing him when he and Peter finally began the journey back down to the hospital, but he did it anyways.

The ride there had been silent and full of tension. Not between Tony and Peter, more just a mounting pressure as Happy drove them closer and closer.

“I'm scared.” Peter mumbled as they drove up to the curb of the hospital.

Tony bit his lip, looking down at the child. He had tried his best to disguise himself and Peter, some futile attempt to keep him out of the press. He looked small and vulnerable in an oversized sweatshirt - that may or may not have been Tony's at one point - and sunglasses, pushing them up every now and then.

“It's okay to be scared Petey, just don't let it control you.” Tony reassured him. He reached past the boy, intent on opening the door up, but Peter latched onto his waist, arms trembling slightly.

“I can't help it though - I'm so scared Tony what if - what if she's dead? What if they didn't tell us?” he sounded so close to tears, as if anything would push him over the edge.

Tony hesitated, wrapping one arm around Peter. “They would've told us Peter, don't worry. They would tell us if something happened.”

Peter didn't respond, instead clinging to him tighter for a moment before letting go. He wiped his eyes, quick swipes before letting Tony finally open up the door.

They slid out of the car, Tony giving one final nod to Happy before they made their way into the stone building. Peter reached up after a moment, taking Tony's hand in his own. He squeezed it once, letting Peter know he was there before they found themselves at the receptionists desk.

Somehow, without the same amount of panic as last time, Tony found the hospital relatively easy to navigate.

“Hi,” he said at the desk once they got there, smiling quickly down at Peter. “We're here to visit someone?”

The lady at the desk sighed, seeming too bored to focus on who was in front of her. Or maybe she just didn't care, which if that was the case props to her.

“Do you know their name?” she asked. Tony almost scoffed at the question, but stopped himself at the last moment. Yes, they just randomly walked into a hospital and decided to visit someone.

“We're here to see May Parker? She's -” Tony glanced down at Peter then, saw the kid’s blank face and changed what he was going to say. Something told him that if he said that May wasn't going to be alive longer that he would flip. “She's in a coma?”

It wasn't much better, but at least Peter didn't freak out.

“Of course,” the receptionist said, not sounding as enthusiastic as her words. “Take a seat in our lobby and I'll contact her doctor to make sure it's an okay time to visit.”

“Great, thanks.” Tony said, making his voice as happy as hers. He led Peter away from the desk, one hand on his shoulder as he directed him towards the small waiting area.

“Is she okay?” Peter asked as soon as they were seated, worrying his lip. Tony had chosen a bench for them in case Peter wanted to be closer to him without the chairs getting in the way.

“I'm sure she is.” Tony reassured the boy. Generally, Tony tried not to lie to Peter about anything he felt was particularly important, but sometimes if he felt like the truth would hurt the boy Tony did. And other times, Tony just didn't know the truth.

This was one of those times.

~~~~

Tony supposed it would happen sometime, but for the news to follow them into the hospital? It was a new fucking low.

They had been sitting side to side, Peter curled halfway onto the man, his face resting next to the Arc Reactor. Tony had rested one hand in his hair, combing through it and gently untangling any knots he came across, a newfound skill he had learned after dozens of attempts where he left defeated, some of Peter's hair taken with him.

Something else had come up with May’s main doctor, so it had been at least twenty minutes since the duo had checked in with the front desk. Peter's anxiety had been cranked to eleven once the receptionist had informed them of it

Peter spotted the cameras before Tony had, letting out a small cry and curling up even further onto him.

“Oh shit,” Tony mumbled as he spotted them too. Evidently, the disguises hadn't worked. He gripped Peter, turning so that it was his back facing towards the camera. “Don't move, okay? Just for a bit.”

Peter nodded into his shoulder, tensing as he heard the crowd get closer. Tony forced himself to remain calm, to keep his face impassive.

“Mr. Stark, what are you doing here?” One of the few without a camera demanded as they got closer.

“Oh you know, just hanging out obviously. What are you doing here?” he deadpanned. “Actually, how did you know I was here?”

“Your car is out front,” someone responded. “The one that you usually go in.” Tony groaned at the answer. Of course, because he couldn't go anywhere in the city apparently without being stalked.

“Who is that with you Mr. Stark?” the first lady asked again. She seemed like an actual journalist to him, one who actually knew how do to her job. “Are the rumors true that you have a son?” Cameras momentarily blinded him, making him grip Peter a bit tighter.

“No,” Tony said calmly. He felt Peter tense more at the answer. “He's a family friends son. And I have to say, kudos to all of you who decided to follow me into a hospital visit with a sick friend!”

A few of the reporters shifted uncomfortably but none made to leave. Tony watched with frustration as the receptionist only barely noticed the situation, calling over the phone for something. Hopefully fucking security.

“Is he staying with you then Mr. Stark?” someone asked. Tony hesitated, looking down at Peter as he kept as still as possible. Would it be safe to give any details away? On the other hand, if he let some things out, the crowd might be more apt to leave in peace.

“Yeah, he is.” Tony responded. A dozen more bright flashes, something that he would never really get used to.

The lady who seemed like the main journalist tilted her head at them, looking at Peter's back before staring at Tony.

“He's the same child from before though, right Mr. Stark?” she asked. Tony glared at her, shielding Peter more.

“If you're talking about when I was babysitting him, then you're right.” he said stiffly. Tony nodded with relief once he saw security guards making their way over to the reporters and photographers, intent on making them leave.

“Okay, break it up people!” one of them shouted, waving his arms to disperse the crowd. “This is a hospital, not a red carpet!”

The crowd grumbled, some leaving quickly while others lingered. The lady glanced behind her quickly before turning and speaking to them one final time.

“Will you be adopting him if the family friend doesn't get better?”

He didn't even have time to respond before she was forced away with a sharp reprimand. He opened his mouth, maybe to answer the question before thinking better. It wasn't their business anyways.

“Sorry about that Mr. Stark sir,” one of the officers said. “They shouldn't have gotten into the hospital in the first place.”

“Yeah, probably.” Tony sighed as they walked away to stand watch at the entrance. Peter tilted his face up, eyes wide as he silently asked him if it was okay to stop hiding. He nodded at the boy, nudging him over as Peter untangled himself and sat besides Tony again.

They sat silently for a few minutes, neither mentioning what had happened. Tony had assumed that Peter knew it would happen someday - but neither had expected it so soon.

"You can go see May Parker now,” the receptionist called out suddenly. “Her room is the first on the right, down that hallway.” she pointed to a hallway directly across from where they were sat.

Peter sprang up, nervous energy evident in the way his hands encircled each other. He took a step towards the hallway, changed his mind and took a step backwards.

“I'm still scared Tony,” he whispered, but took the step again towards the hallway as Tony stood up. “But I wanna see her.”

Tony smiled down at him, one hand running through Peter's hair. “It's okay to be scared, remember?” Peter nodded, more confident as they made their way towards the room.

“Mr. Parker, Mr. Stark!” the doctor inside the room called out before they fully made their way in front of it. She came out, smiling at both of them.

“I'm so happy you've come,” she said. “Especially you Peter.”

“Me too,” the boy nodded nervously. “I really wanna see her.”

“Well come on in.” she gestured to the room. “I’d also be happy to answer any questions while you're here.” she disappeared inside again, leaving them outside.

Peter hesitated, looking up at Tony. He looked a bit frustrated, as if he couldn't tell what he wanted. Or as if he did, but didn't want to be rude.

Oh.

What if he didn't want Tony to come in with him? What if Peter was gearing up to say goodbye in his own way? Tony wasn't going to take that away from the boy.

“Do you want me to go in with you?” Tony whispered to Peter. The boy stood still, contemplating his choices.

“No,” he said finally. “I wanna talk to her by myself.”

Tony nodded, one final reassuring hand on his shoulder before he gestured for Peter to follow the doctor into May’s room.

He watched the boy hesitantly enter the room, making sure he wouldn't break down right there before retiring back to the lobby.

It would be hard to wait, but Tony would follow whatever Peter wanted to do.

~~~~

Tony really wished Peter had let him come with him.

It had felt like hours, when it reality it had barely been one when the boy came out of the room.

Tony sat up straighter immediately, ready to see a sniffling or even fully crying child approach him. But as the boy got closer he frowned in confusion as to what he was seeing.

Peter was...he was beaming?

“Hi Peter.” Tony said once the kid was fully in front of him. He wanted to ask him what he was so happy about, to demand what had happened. Had May somehow miraculously woken up? There was no way - the doctor had basically said the first night that she would never wake up. What had changed?

“Hi Tony,” Peter kept smiling, glancing back at the doctor who stood in May’s doorway and waved to her. “We can go now.”

“You sure?” Tony asked. “You don't wanna stay any longer?”

“I'm good Tony, we can go.” Peter looked more relaxed even, some of the pent up tension he had been carrying around with him getting dropped. Somehow it worried Tony even more.

“Okay,” Tony said, letting the matter go for the moment. “If you're sure.”

“I'm sure.” Peter replied, already making his way out of the lobby. Tony picked up his pace to catch up with the child, keeping a worried eye on him. How had Peter changed so quickly? What had happened that in the room with his Aunt May that had changed Peter from crying and anxious to smiling and light?

Did he think she was going to get better? Tony hoped not. He hated being the one to give him bad news, but Peter had obviously changed his mind about something, and it didn't seem like it was anything but May.

But seeing Peter so happy, Tony resolved to talk to him about it later. He would just let the kid breathe a little, let him be happy about whatever it was that had made him that way. He would get around talking about May with Peter eventually.

Maybe.

~~~~

It had been a bit longer than week after Peter came to stay with Tony that he officially met DareDevil.

Peter hadn’t been back to school yet, which the boy hadn't seemed to mind in the beginning. But Tony noticed the kid getting antsy, spending his days watching tv and sleeping mostly. It made Tony feel slightly guilty, the fact that he kept Peter cooped inside.

But really, it was what was safest, right? What if the kid had a breakdown at school and Tony wasn't called? What if something happened to May and Peter didn't get to her fast enough to say a final goodbye?

And now that news outlets had reported on Peter as the mysterious family friend's kid that Tony was looking after, he was the center of a media firestorm. Everyone wanted to know what his name was, wanted clearer footage of him, wanted to know who was in hospital that they were visiting. The public had especially lost their shit in Tony's opinion, debating whether Tony was a fit guardian and what was in store for the boy's future.

It pissed Tony off, honestly. It wasn't like Peter's life was mindless fucking entertainment for them. And if they found out Peter’s name, they could track down his aunt and his school - they could learn everything about him. And considering how many die-hard Iron Man fans there were, it wasn't like Tony was worrying over nothing.

So no, Peter hadn't been in school for a week. He had talked with Ned and Michelle over the phone and computer a few times, there were even plans in the works for a meet up (playdate, Ned and Peter had said seriously, which was adorable to Tony) for the kids, but not for at least a couple more days.

That didn't mean Peter was happy with the arrangement though.

“If I can't go to school, can we at least see my friend? The only other thing I wanna do is watch the Star Wars marathon that's on today.” Peter complained. He was sulking on the couch, listlessly flipping through the channels.

“Kid, I'm telling you - I'll make sure that you see Ned and MJ soon, okay? And we can watch that together tonight. I'll even try and follow the storyline.” Tony said.

“I know that Tony! I mean my other friend, the adult one.” Peter threw the remote down in despair, ignoring what he had said about the movie. Tony frowned but didn't reprimand him, at least not yet. It didn't seem exactly fair to tell the kid not to do that while he had just barely seen his aunt in the hospital.

“I don't think that's a good idea Petey,” Tony said. In all reality, he really just didn't want to see DareDevil again. “It's only been a couple of days, I'm sure he can wait -”

“Tony please,” Peter begged. “I haven't - I know that you're doing the right thing but I haven't done anything but watch tv all week, and I can't go out as SpiderMan anymore and I can't go to school and I can’t see my friends so please, let me see him?”

In an instant, he felt like shit. What had felt like the right thing - what was the right thing, Tony corrected himself - had also inadvertently locked Peter up inside the only floor in the Tower that Tony allowed the boy on.

“And I'm probably keeping you from your work, right? You're gonna have to work hard to catch up when Aunt May -” Peter broke off the sentence, letting the words remain unsaid.

“Wait, Peter - you don't think that May is going to - that she's going to be able to take care of you, do you?” Tony asked. He was more than just a little concerned by the boy's sudden change of attitude from his first day.

“It’s not important right now,” Peter insisted, although he deflated a little. “I really really just want to see my friend.”

“If I say yes, we talk later okay?” Tony said. Peter bit his lip, eyebrows knit together. He nodded slowly after a second.

“Okay, fine fine. I'm coming with you though okay?” Tony rolled his eyes at the kid's protests. “No, none of that. You aren't seeing a grown man by yourself, alright?”

“But I went to Germany with you the day after meeting you,” Peter said with a head tilt. “Does that count?”

“No, because that's me. And I am definitely more trustworthy than whoever this man is.” Tony said back. He hoped it was true, because if Matt informed the kid that they had met, then they were going to have problems. More specifically, Peter was going to have problems with Tony.

“You're so grumpy Tony,” Peter smiled at him, albeit a bit shaky. “I told you being cooped up wasn't good.”

“I'm not grumpy. And you know that I don't mind being home with you right? In fact, I would rather just do that. The cellphone and other technology are just marvelous when it comes to running a business Peter.” Tony said.

Because it was true, Tony hadn't been to any meetings or other shit he was sure he was supposed to be at for some time. But that was what Rhodey was for, right? The man didn't know why he was filling in for him, but he didn't seem to mind and only questioned him occasionally. Tony knew eventually he would have to truly introduce him to Peter then, and wait for the man to berate him for not trusting him earlier - and then insist on helping raise the kid.

Yeah, telling Rhodey could wait.

“Can we go now?” Peter begged. It broke Tony away from his thoughts, taking the moment to frown at the question. “It's his day off - I mean he usually goes into work anyways but it's also our day to meet so he might be home! Please?”

Tony sighed as Peter widened his eyes, pulling off a very convincing innocent act. Puppy dog eyes or something like that. Why didn't anyone tell Tony that you always seem to give in when your kid does that to you? It was unfair.

“Okay, fine.” Tony gave in, rolling his eyes but still smiling at the slight cheer that Peter let out. “Let's go meet this mystery hero.”

“His fake name is Daredevil, actually.” Peter told him. Tony's smile turned into a grimace as he realized something. What if the man told Peter that Tony and him had already met, that he had broken the kid's trust? He was sure there would be more than hell to pay for a slight like that.

“Oh, I might've heard of him.” Tony said vaguely.

~~~~

They had gotten there quite fast, Peter giving directions that Tony already knew. The boy also filled him in on information about DareDevil that he already knew, but he tried his hardest to make his reactions seem genuine.

“So he's blind, but he's a superhero? That's a smart choice.” Tony huffed out once they had reached the apartment building. He already knew which floor and which unit was Matt's, but let Peter lead him there anyways.

“That's not very nice.” Peter chided him. “Mr. Murdock is really really good at what he does.” They were standing outside of his apartment then, Peter having knocked on it moments ago. Tony shifted from foot to foot, trying to let go of his nerves.

The door opened then, the same way that he remembered - and then a man that Tony had seen before stood before them. Matt tilted his head, taking in the sounds in front of him.

“Hi Mr. Murdock,” Peter said. “It's me and my - my guardian.” Tony forced himself to not wonder what Peter had been about to say.

“Hello Peter.” Matt stooped low enough to pull the boy into a one armed hug, short enough for Tony to allow it. Then he turned, seeming to look at him through the sunglasses he seemed to wear perpetually.

Tony's stomach dropped, heart ramping up for the tense seconds that followed. If the man revealed to Peter that Tony had actually already been to see Matt, he was sure it would hurt the boy, astronomically.

“And who's this guardian you speak of?”

Tony wanted to let out a sigh of pure relief, but instead shrugged and let Peter introduce him.

“This is Mr. Stark, but I call him Tony.” Peter gestured to him, even though Matt would have no way of seeing it. “And Tony, this is Mr. Murdock.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Stark.” Matt said, purposefully raising his arm higher than where Tony could comfortably shake it. He glared but took his hand anyways, arm at an awkward angle.

“Yeah sure, you too.” he grumbled. Peter bit his lip, looking back and forth between the two men.

“Is there any reason you wanted to see me Peter?” Matt asked then, and the boy's face fell momentarily. Tony nodded to Peter, encouraging him to speak.

“Yeah, something big happened Mr. Murdock.” Peter said after a moment. “Can we come in and talk?”

~~~~

To Tony's surprise, Peter hadn't cried while he recounted the bare bones of what had happened to Matt.

He kept a mainly straight face, only crumpling a few times before regaining his composure and continuing his story. He also admitted to the man that Tony knew he was DareDevil and how Peter had been Spiderman (Spiderkid) - emphasis on had.

Matt nodded and responded, giving no indication that he knew beforehand. Tony had to admit, it was impressive. After a couple of awkward moments once Peter was done telling his story Tony had wandered around the apartment again. He could hear Matt and Peter chatting quietly on the couch, making sure to keep a watch on them just in case.

It really was amazing, the way the lights shined into the space. He could see why anyone who came to Matt's place would be easily impressed by it.

“And the heartbeat is usually the main indicator, but not the only one. Can you hear mine? See how it sounds steady? Imagine it rushing.”

Tony turned around at the words, his eyebrows knit together. What the fuck had Matt just said about heartbeats? Why was he telling that to Peter?

“And there's also verbal cues sometimes, the hitching of their breath can indicate a lie. Not always though, sometimes they just may be emotional.” Tony trailed closer, watching as Peter nodded intently at Matt. He smiled slightly seeing the boy look so serious and focused, but was still pretty fucking confused.

“The most important thing to remember is that you never know for certain. But you can bluff usually, catch someone in a lie when you don't actually know if they're lying or not.” Matt concluded.

“Excuse me, are you teaching Peter how to spot a liar?” Tony asked. Matt and Peter both turned to him, only one having the decency to blush. The other smiled at his general direction, which yes - was still very much creepy.

“It's not an exact science Mr. Stark,” Matt said, emphasizing the exact. “I'm just teaching him some clues. His senses are heightened enough so he can hear heartbeats, so who's to say he can't learn a thing or two about that?”

Tony snorted but sat down anyways, wrapping one arm around Peter and raising an eyebrow at him. The boy giggled and raised his too, an imitation that was pretty damn good if you asked Tony.

“Okay then sir,” Tony mocked the man. “Let's see if you can tell if I'm lying.”

Matt smiled at them, one that Tony thought would be a lot meaner if Peter hasn't been sitting right next to him.

“Tell me something then.” Matt said, before focusing his attention on Peter. “Listen to his heartbeat and his breathing. Remember that there is some guessing, right? All we need is a good guess and some luck.” Peter nodded rapidly, face determined as he concentrated.

“Okay.” Tony said as he thought. What was a good enough lie that it wasn't obviously false but wasn't true either? If he was just letting Peter try he would've made it known he was kidding, but something in him wanted to best DareDevil. Maybe it was a superhero thing, always having to outdo each other. Or maybe it was a Stark thing. Yeah, it was probably a Stark thing.

“I have never had surgery in my life,” Tony finally decided on. “Except for the Arc Reactor. But other than that, none.” He knew it was kind of lame to go for a trick question, but when Matt frowned at him it filled Tony with some smug sense of being right - and that was all that mattered.

“That's not fair,” he complained. “It's way too general and specific, all at the same time. How did you even do that?”

“Hey, you said anything, I'm telling you anything! Right Peter?” Tony defended himself, grinning down at the kid.

“He's right Mr. Murdock, you did say anything!” Peter smiled back at Tony, wide enough for him to see all his teeth.

“Goddamnit.” Matt sighed, acting more upset than he actually was. What was it about Peter that made grown adults act like fools for his amusement? Tony didn't know, but it was extremely entertaining when he wasn't the one being a fool.

“I'll go with no.”

“Wrong!” Tony crowed. “I broke my arm as a kid and needed surgery!” He put his hand up for Peter to high five. The boy reciprocated enthusiastically, slapping it with so much that Tony felt it reverberate throughout his arm. Probably not the best idea to let a superhuman child slap any part of your body, huh?

“You two planned this,” Matt accused them. “You two planned this and I fell for your tricks.”

“No we didn't!” Peter cried out, almost vibrating with energy. He grinned wider, something Tony didn't even know was possible. “Tony's just too smart for you!”

“Good one kid,” Tony said, hand up for another high five. “Put it here.”

He realized his mistake a moment later.

~~~~

It was shaping up to be a very very long day for Tony Stark.

Tony had been ready to leave for awhile, but after Peter drained his energy to the point of apparently requiring an “emergency nap”, he conceded to let the kid rest a little.

But really, who's idea had it been to even allow the kid to run and jump all over the apartment, especially the ceiling? Matt had declared an end to his lesson with Peter, which Tony was pretty sure was because he was a sore loser. So instead, Peter had taken to showing off his abilities for the men.

Tony had watched Peter in horror, shouts of “Be careful!” and “If you fall and get hurt I won't feel sorry!” echoing throughout the apartment (which actually wasn't true, Tony would feel goddamn awful if the kid fell - which is why he had frantically followed Peter's every movement with arms out in case he magically unstuck himself).

And so after the kid declared himself exhausted and rolled onto Matt's bed, to the amusement of the lawyer but ire of Tony - he promptly fell asleep.

“Geez, he's gonna be the death of me.” Tony muttered. He stood watch over Peter, watching his chest rise and fall.

“Probably not the best choice of words,” Matt responded smoothly. “Considering the situation.”

“Oh shit,” Tony winced. He really had to be more careful around the kid. “Good thing he's sleeping?”

Matt huffed out a bit of laughter from his place on the couch. “You're welcome, by the way. For not telling Peter about our delightful first visit.”

“Yeah yeah,” Tony dismissed the dig. “How'd you even know that?”

“Your heart. It sped up immensely when I greeted Peter.”

“Bullshit, that's just a party trick. Now Peter's gonna accuse me of lying every time get worried. And trust me, I'm always worried around him.”

Matt didn't respond, instead just clicking his tongue. Tony stared back down at Peter, watching for any signs of a night terror. When he found none he sighed and turned away, dragging a hand through his hair.

God, there was a lot of shit to figure out. Peter going back to school - did he have his school bag? What would he need? Tony had most of the kid's stuff sent over from his old apartment, but what if something had been left behind? And what about the media? Would the kids at his school know about Tony? They would question Peter, that was for sure. And his friends, Tony had promised to let the kid meet up with his friends at least.

God damn, taking care of a kid was exhausting.

“Have you looked into any adoption lawyers yet Mr. Stark?” Matt asked him suddenly. It startled him from his thoughts of school and friends.

“No,” Tony admitted after a beat. “I don't wanna rush things. I'm not sure if Peter thinks May can get better - like what if he thinks this is just some extended visit? I don't wanna freak him out.”

“I don't think he thinks that.” Matt said. He peered backwards in the general direction of Tony as if he could see him. It still fucking creeped him out, how Matt could do that.

“I think he understands that May isn't going to get better,” he continued. “Peter's not blind.” Matt smiled at his own joke and Tony rolled his eyes. There were only so many blind jokes you could find funny until they were dreaded.

“Just because he gets that doesn't mean he accepts it.” Tony countered. He took a seat across from Matt, making sure he kept his eyes on the sleeping Peter. Tony wished he could fall asleep anywhere like that too.

“That's true,” Matt conceded, shrugging his shoulders. “But something tells me that he's already past the denial stage of grief. Hell, I'm not sure he even went through it. You have to remember Tony, he was there when May had her first heart attack. He was the one who saw it.”

“Just because he's not showing that he's in denial doesn't mean he's not.” Tony argued. Because yeah, Peter had been suspiciously happy if you asked Tony. Could the boy just be moving on with his life really incredibly fucking well? Maybe. But it hadn't even been more than a full week since May was rushed to the hospital, and even though Peter had thought she was dead didn't mean he backtracked.

Maybe it had been a bad idea to bring Peter to the hospital.

“I think the doctor was too hopeful to him,” Tony admitted. “She didn't want him to be upset. I mean I don't want him to be either but he deserves the truth at least. And the truth is, May isn't getting better. She's gonna die.”

“Which is exactly why you should be looking into adoption, Tony.” Matt said. “Eventually her will is going to be read, and if someone else is named his guardian you'll have to take it to court. And then what? Who will a court choose, Tony? It's better to show your dedication now.”

“Maybe.”

“Not maybe! Yes, it is better.”

“Okay sure, whatever you say.” Tony said dismissively. “But it's not fair to go any further without talking to Peter about it. Besides, why are you pushing it? I would've thought you'd want Peter yourself.”

“Yikes papa bear, back it up.” Matt said dryly. “Me and Peter, we don't have your same type of relationship. I just mainly made sure he didn't get hurt too bad back in Queens. He's a stubborn kid, you know? I was shocked when he told me he was giving up Spiderman for a bit.”

“I maybe sorta blackmailed him a bit,” Tony admitted. “But it was a good cause. So that's why you never tried to stop him? Because he's stubborn? Sorry, but that's a shitty excuse.”

“It is. But I didn't know his real identity, so I didn't exactly have much leverage over that aspect of his life. The first time he even told me his name was when he asked me to look after Queens.”

“And yet you knew he was a kid?” Tony asked.

"Didn't you know he was a kid when you brought him to that big fight?”

“That was different. I only wanted him to do one thing for me but he rushed off into the action without me! If I had known he would be so stupid I wouldn't have brought him.” Tony glared at Matt, even though he knew that the man couldn't actually see it. He hoped he at least sensed it.

“Okay Tony, I believe you. We both made mistakes with Peter, okay? Me more than you.” Matt conceded.

“You're goddamn right about that.” Tony responded. It had gotten tense enough to the point that he was ready to leave, to drag Peter out of the bed and haul him into the car.

“Time to go again?” Matt said softly after a beat. Tony bit his lip, getting up to wake Peter up.

“Yep, because this just got too awkward for me. I usually prefer when my arguments end in bed or with the other person admitting defeat.” Tony kept his tone light, not wanting to fully scare the man off. If he was important to Peter, he would try and keep communication open.

Matt chuckled, standing up also. “Unfortunately neither of those will happen. Turns out I'm stubborn too.”

“Why does Peter always have to choose the ones like us? It's like he gravitates towards the stubborn superhero dad type.” Tony asked. He shook Peter's shoulder carefully, rolling his eyes slightly when he groaned.

“Because we're always so charming,” Matt grinned as Peter groaned and opened one eye. “Especially with each other.”

“Hey Petey, time to go home. You still wanna watch your movie, right?” he ignored Matt, instead intent on getting them out of the apartment.

“Yeah, I do.” Peter mumbled, letting Tony help him off of the bed. He blinked a couple of times, brushing the hair out his face.

“Thanks for letting us come over Mr. Murdock,” Peter said sincerely as they made their way out of the apartment. “I'm glad we came.”

“I'm glad you did too,” Matt smiled and knelt down, giving the kid a loose hug. Tony told himself to not get jealous, because that wouldn't help anything. Probably. “I look forward to our next meeting.”

“Mhm, me too! Soon, I hope.” Peter grinned at Tony, eyes crinkling with mischief. Tony smiled back at him, gesturing for the child to keep moving. “Okay, I'll see you later!”

“Yes, bye Peter.” Matt said back. “And you too, Tony. Have a good night.”

“Yep, bye.” Tony grumbled, ushering Peter out of the apartment. He turned back once, opening his mouth for one final barb at the man, but Matt beat him to speaking.

“Just discuss it, okay?” Tony frowned, and then frowned some more when he realized what Matt was talking about. “Tonight. Just do it.”

“Fine fine,” he said dismissively. “Bye.” Matt nodded in their direction, almost looking like he was giving Tony a pointed look before shutting the door behind them.

“What was that about?” Peter asked.

“Nothing.” Tony forced a smile on his face, even as it dawned on him what he had agreed to do. No way in hell the kid was ready for that conversation yet.

“Now let's get home, okay?”

~~~~

It was going to be a catastrophe, Tony was sure of it.

For one, he got flustered easy when trying to gentle around the kid. Second, he was sure Peter wasn't ready to talk about adoption. And third, he had a sneaking suspicion that Peter had convinced himself that May would get better, if his sudden attitude change told Tony anything.

They had gotten back to the Tower relatively fast, Tony going just a bit over the speed limit. He wasn't sure if it was a bad habit he had picked up from Happy or if Happy had picked it up from him. Probably both.

Once they were let in and he had parked he ushered himself and the kid into the elevator, pressed the button for the right floor and didn't speak. He didn't trust himself to say anything at the moment.

It was probably for the best. The boy was chattering excitedly, all sorts of interesting facts about Star Wars that any other time Tony would be listening intently to, but he honestly had too much going on to focus much. He nodded vaguely when it seemed appropriate.

Peter seemed to sense the nervousness radiating off of Tony, letting his sentences trail off and glancing up at the man with his own nervous expression. Great, just what he wanted - to scare the kid before they even talked. The elevator opened too slow for him, wanting nothing more than to just sit down.

God, what had Tony let himself get talked into? He knew it really was for the best but that didn't mean he was happy about it.

Peter got out first, one last nervous glance at him before he stepped into the floor - Tony following right behind him.

Once they were in the living room, Tony sat on the couch. Peter hovered close by, having stopped talking altogether due to what he assumed were nerves. He took a deep breath, patting the space next to him before speaking.

“Can we talk now kiddo?” Tony asked. Peter turned to him, face pinched with confusion and nerves. He nodded uneasily, taking a seat on the couch.

“We need to talk about May,” he said the words slowly, in order not to scare Peter away. “And about what's going to happen.”

“Okay?” Peter sounded unsure of himself, head cocked to one side as he thought. “What about it?”

“We should - we need to discuss our next steps.” Tony stumbled over his words, delaying the inevitable. How do you just tell a kid you care so much about that hey, your aunt is brain dead! She's not getting better, now cry and scream about it!

“Okay, what are they?” Peter squirmed, half looking at Tony and half looking behind him. Tony knew he was probably making the kid uncomfortable with his beating around the bush, but it was a hard subject to talk about.

“When I lost my parents, it devastated me. Even though I wasn't particularly close to them, I didn't really have anyone there to look after me anymore - or anyone to make sure I was doing okay.” Tony finally decided on. “I just think that we should talk about how you're feeling about Aunt May. I know you said that you wanted to stay here, and if you were serious about that I want to start looking into adoption, Peter.”

Tony watched the child with anticipation, heart sinking when he watched all emotions seem to switch off of Peter's face. God fucking damn it, he knew it was too soon to discuss shit with Peter, yet he let himself get carried away by Matt.

“Peter? Can you tell me how you feel about that?” Tony asked. Peter ignored him for a moment, head hung low.

“I thought she was getting better?” Peter said it like it was a question, a statement that Tony could confirm or deny. He lifted his head then, face already red and eyes welling with tears.

“Oh kiddo…she -” Tony winced as he thought of what to say. What could he say? “She's not going to get better.”

“But the doctor made it seem like she could!” Peter argued, his voice getting higher and higher. A few tears had trickled down one of his cheeks but no others escaped yet.

“First off, take a deep breath.” Tony said, nodding at the boy as he did so. “I don't want to hurt your feelings Peter, or make you sad, but Aunt May isn't going to make it.” As soon as the words escaped his mouth Tony wished he could take them back.

“Why would you say that?” Peter gasped, face screwing up as he tried to stop more tears from falling. “Why do we have to talk about this? I thought - I thought -” the boy stopped talking, instead taking another deep breath.

“What did you think? Talk to me, please Peter.” Tony begged. He moved closer to the boy, one hand on his shoulder. Peter moved closer, letting Tony wrap an arm around him.

“I thought she was going to get better! It feels like it's been a long time since she - she went into a coma. Sometimes people wake up, I thought she was gonna wake up!” Peter was sobbing then, large gasping cries that jerked his frame back and forth. Tony pulled the boy closer, wrapping both arms around him now.

“That's a perfectly reasonable thing to think Peter,” he reassured him. “Trust me, if I could do anything more I would be. The only reason I brought this up is because I wanted to make sure that you would be okay with me talking to some lawyers about adoption.”

“I don't wanna be adopted,” Peter sobbed. “I wanna be with Aunt May!”

“I know, I know kiddo,” Tony said. He ignored the way his heart hurt when Peter said that, because it didn't matter at the moment. What mattered was the crying child in his arms. “But we gotta at least start thinking about it.”

“I just don't want her to die Tony,” Peter said, face pressed against his shoulder. “I miss her so much it hurts.”

“Then talk to me about it,” Tony said. “I'm always here to talk about anything and try to help.” Peter paused for a moment, taking another gulp of air before he untangled himself from Tony.

“I didn't want you to feel bad,” the boy admitted. “But I can't stop thinking about her, all the time. I can't - I can't get over her.”

“Listen kid, I don't expect you to just get over what happened with your aunt.” Tony said. “But before you've said that you wanted to stay with me right?”

Peter nodded, wiping at his eyes. “I do want to Tony,” he said. “I just thought…” he deflated, what little control he had mastered over his emotions disappearing.

“I thought I had been wrong,” Peter was crying again, but not the same hysterical sobs that he had been doling out all week. Now he sounded hopeless, crying for what had been realized. “I thought maybe she was getting better! I thought she was gonna wake up Tony, I was so sure!”

“Okay kiddo, it's okay.” Tony mumbled, pulling the boy into another hug. It was odd, how affectionate he found himself being to the boy. Tony had never been particularly affectionate, hadn't grown up in a household where he was held and coddled, as Howard would say - but he discovered with Peter that he wasn't his father.

“It's not that I don't wanna be adopted by you,” Peter hiccuped. He had buried his face back between Tony's shoulder and neck, face tilted up for the man to be able to hear him. “It's hard to think about though.”

“Let's give it a rest then, okay?” Tony conceded. “We can talk about it again later.”

“I'll think about it hard, I promise.” Peter said as Tony let him go. He gave him a watery smile, the first Tony had seen since their conversation. A few tears still streamed down his cheeks, but these now more of an afterthought. “As long as you think about me going to school.”

“Deal,” Tony said. He changed the subject, not ready to go any further down that road at the moment. “Now didn't you tell me you wanted to watch some sort of nerd movie? Star Wars? Isn't that the one where they boldly go and use the force because they're wizards?”

Peter faked groaned, letting his smile get a bit wider. “I'm gonna pretend I didn't hear those words. That was so wrong it almost hurt. I've gotta tell Ned you said that!”

“Yeah, you do that.” Tony raised an eyebrow at the boy. “Go ahead and call him, get ready in your room. I specifically remember getting you some of those nerd pajamas to show all that pride.”

“Thanks Tony,” and now Peter was back to no smile, but not crying. “For everything, really.”

“No problem kiddo,” Tony said quietly. “You know that I’d do anything for you, right?”

“I know.” Peter smiled again, looking just a touch sad. He turned then, Tony watching the kid until he was fully in his room.

Well, that had been a shitshow. Tony knew it was too early, way too fucking early to spring adoption on the kid. Besides, with the media attention now all hungry for a piece of the mystery child in his life, any mention of adoption would undoubtedly find its way to everyone. And then Peter would be under even more scrutiny and then he would get mad at Tony for not letting him go to school and then everything would be even more shitty than it already was.

Tony was giving himself a headache even just thinking about it, and the fact that even though all his fears were entirely founded, he would go through with it anyways.

Well, not quite yet. There was still just a piece of unfinished business that Tony was curious about. And even though he was one of the most powerful and rich men in the world, he did admit that going through all the proper hoops for what he needed was probably the right idea, especially with adoption definitely in his future.

Good thing he knew just the lawyer - sorry, defense attorney - for the job.

Tony grit his teeth as he called the number FRIDAY had supplied for him, the agency where Matt worked. It would be much easier just to call the man up himself, but something told Tony that Matt would call that crossing a line. And when you're calling in a favor you don't deserve, it's best to not cross any lines.

The line rang for a few beats, already annoying the hell out of him. Matt had said he would be going in, even though it was a day off. If he had changed his mind, Tony might just cross a line.

But no, thankfully someone picked up.

“You've reached Murdock and Nelson, how can I help you?” a man who was decidedly not Matt but probably Nelson answered the line.

“Um, hi. I need to speak to Matt?” Tony asked, tapping his foot impatiently. “It’s pretty important.”

“Oh yeah, he just got in. Can I ask who's calling?”

“Tony Stark. Tell the asshole to get on the line as soon as possible, okay?” Tony really wasn't trying to be a jerk, but he was frustrated. Mainly with himself, but also with Matt. It just felt better to blame someone else for his blunder with Peter.

“Oh - oh my God, yeah of course!” the man stuttered. “I'll transfer you right now!”

“Thanks.”

Tony waited in bated anticipation for a few moments, rolling his eyes with the amount of time it took. He wouldn't be surprised if the man was purposely delaying the call just to mess with him.

Finally, Matt picked up.

“This is Mr. Murdock, how can I help you?” Apparently whoever had first answered hadn't bothered to tell the man who had been calling.

“Yeah, hi Matt. It's me.” Tony said impatiently.

“Oh, Tony. Miss me already?”

“Oh yes, I'm really missing all your charm and wit. That's specifically why I called you! God, no wonder you became a lawyer, with all that intelligence you have!” Tony said. He knew he was being salty, but fuck it. He wasn't feeling very nice today.

“I take it Peter wasn't fond of the adoption idea.” Matt said dryly.

“Told you you were intelligent! Yeah, that was a total shitshow, kid probably hates my guts now, so thanks for that advice. But that's not why I called you either.”

“Tony, he doesn't hate you. You're being dramatic -”

“If you continue that sentence I will buy your building and convert it into a McDonald's,” Tony threatened. “And then hire you as the manager.”

“I'm - okay, point taken?” Matt sounded confused. Okay, it wasn't Tony's best insult but he made it up on the fly. “So what do you need?”

“Can you get me a copy of May Parker’s will?” Tony asked. The man on the other end paused, but only for a second. He probably hadn't been expecting such a turn in their conversation, but Tony wasn't anything but surprising.

“Well, she's not deceased yet. But I bet I could find out who's the executor, assuming she chose a lawyer,” Matt said after thinking. “Peter's only twelve, so I won't even look into whether he is or not, which leaves lawyer.”

“So you can?” Tony asked again.

“I probably can.” Matt confirmed. “Although I thought I told you to start the adoption process before looking at the will.”

“Hey, I'm just taking a precaution!” Tony defended himself. “See who I'm going up against, and all that!”

“Okay okay, I'll look into it. Let me call you back in a bit, I'll let you know when I've got some progress.”

“Thanks Matt,” Tony said. Yes, it did almost hurt to say that. “I appreciate it.”

“No problem Tony.”

“Okay, I gotta go.”

“Wait - one more thing!” Matt called out, right as he went to hang up.

“What?”

“Don't call this number again, unless you want Foggy to be ringing you all hours. Trust me, he will.” and with that, the man hung up.

“Douche,” Tony mumbled, although he didn't mean it. In reality, the man had been nothing but kind and courteous to Tony and Peter. That didn't mean he had to like him all that much though. At best, Tony would say Matt was on level with your child's best friends parent. You know you'll be spending some time with them, so you might as well be friends right? The only added twist was the superhero thing, really. And the fact that there was only one kid.

Okay, so it wasn't really anything like that.

Tony sighed, ready to charge his phone and ignore it for awhile, watch a movie with Peter and spend the rest of the day with him. But as he went to do so, his phone began to ring.

Which was strange, since Tony rarely got calls on his personal phone. Really only the Avengers had the number and a select few others, none of who he could think would be calling him at the moment.

He clicked the screen, eyes widening before narrowing as he read the screen as it continued to ring.

A blocked number. How the fuck did a blocked number get Tony’s personal number?

He contemplated letting it ring out, but curiosity got the better of him. With a hesitant finger, Tony accepted the call and brought it to his ear.

“Who is this and how did you get this number?” Tony demanded, before whoever was on the other side could speak. Hey, sometimes it was better to go on the offensive.

"Hello? You know during a phone call usually both people speak.” Tony said after no one spoke back.

Another pause.

Tony almost went to hang up, to find a way to trace the number and give hell to whoever was there. But something inside of him told Tony to just hold on a moment longer, and so he did.

“Tony.” the voice on the other end said finally, and he fucking froze.

No way.

No goddamn way.

“Tony? Are you there?” Steve asked, and holy shit it was him, it was actually Steve Fucking Rogers on the other end of the phone. Tony didn't know whether to burst into furious tears or scream. Maybe both.

“Oh hey Steve, how you been? Enjoying your vacation? I know I am - wait, except I'm not since the whole world is basically a shitshow right now.” Tony knew he was rambling, that the barbs in his words were too shaky for the other man to take them to heart the way Tony wanted him to.

“Tony, we - we've got a problem.” And Tony wanted to cackle. So this was why Steve had finally decided to call him, some type of issue that Captain America and his rogue squad couldn't handle. And of course now it was Tony's problem too, because he would have to get them all out of their mess, like he always did.

“What, did your human popsicle murder some more parents?” Tony asked. The anger was back in his voice then, because how could it not be? This man - this bastard - had no right to ask anything of him.

“Please Tony, I know you're angry,” Steve pleaded. “But I have a situation that I need your help with. Everyone is here, we all need your help.”

“Well isn't this a funny situation,” Tony ignored the obvious pain in Steve's voice at how hurt Tony was. “After almost everyone turns their backs on me all of the sudden you expect me to care! Almost makes a man forget about how who could have arguably be called his best friend sided with the man who uh, killed his parents? I won't even mention how you tried to kill me with a fucking shield.”

“I wasn't trying to kill you Tony, I was -” Steve sighed as he caught himself. “That's not important right now though. What's important is that -”

“Oh now wait a minute! I think it's extremely important!”

“Well can we discuss that later then? There's a situation happening that I need you for!” Steve really did sound desperate, more desperate than Tony had heard in awhile. It softened him only slightly, and only because it was Steve.

“You know what? I think I would be more apt to listen to your complaints if you apologized.”

“What? Tony this is not a joke! This is serious, it's not loo -”

“Oh, so this situation is more important than two words? Stone fucking cold Steve.”

“Okay, okay look I'm sor -”

“Tony?” Tony jerked back from the apology he was hearing at the new voice.

He whirled around at the voice to see Peter with one foot in the living room and one in the hallway. He was hovering, face tilted and confused as he watched the man yell and scoff into the phone for God knows how long. The kid had changed into his pajamas, only a bit too big. At least Tony was getting better at guessing sizes.

“Hey kiddo,” Tony said, forcing his voice to be more mellow and soft. “What can I do for you?”

“Wait, is someone else there?” Steve asked and Tony ignored him, waiting for the boy to respond.

“My - my movie, the first Star Wars? It's on now and I was wondering if you still wanted to watch it with me?” Peter's voice went higher at the end, brows drawing together with nervousness as he worried on his bottom lip.

“Of course we can.” Tony answered holding one finger up at the child, who visibly relaxed. “Just let me finish this call.”

“Who's there Tony? Is that a kid?”

“Listen, I don't have time for you right now.” Tony began, feeling satisfied at the way the other man sputtered out his questions. “How about we talk about this tomorrow, yeah? I don't think you're quite in any position to be making demands just yet.”

“Tony, I need your help. The Avengers - we all need to -”

“Yeah, bye. Call me back tomorrow!” Tony cut the man off, flipping the phone down to end the call.

He turned to Peter and rolled his eyes, making the boy giggle. “Turn the tv on bug, let's see who is really the bigger nerd.” he said. Peter scrambled to the couch, grabbing the remote triumphantly as Tony pretended to swipe for it.

“Okay, let's see this.” Tony declared, settling on the couch with Peter curled up next to him. He was glad for the tiny moments, where for maybe just a few minutes the boy would forget what had happened with his aunt and would act like a regular child again.

Tony knew by the way the boy smiled at him and eased against him that Peter wasn't upset with him. It was hard for Tony to really remember sometimes how young he was, that Peter wasn't a hardened crime fighter like himself or the rest of the fractured Avengers. He still had hope - and Tony had maybe inadvertently shattered some of them when he brought up Aunt May’s condition.

But it was for the best, right? Peter was twelve - he needed someone to take care of him with May out of the picture now. And if it wasn't Tony, who would it be? Matt? He had no doubt that the man would try, but with his rapidly expanding business and nights spent as DareDevil, Tony doubted that Peter would get as much attention as Matt would want to give him. For now, what Tony really needed that will.

If he could see it - see who, if anyone was named as Peter's guardian then Tony could plan his next steps. Because if someone wasn't written there, he would immediately start the adoption process. And if someone was? Tony would challenge it. If there was someone else written there, they hadn't been there for Peter. They hadn't been a parent to the boy even while his aunt was alive.

No, it had to be -

“Tony!” Peter gasped then, forcing the man away from his thoughts. He turned, smiling slightly for Peter's sake, before it was wiped when he saw what was playing on the channel that the tv had turned onto.

“With Captain America and several other of the fallen Avengers having been spotted in Scotland, they have sworn to surrender to local authorities if the United States was to negotiate for them.” Wait what? Did that really just fucking come out of his tv?

“Oh my gosh,” Peter breathed out, head swiveling between the tv and Tony. “What's happening?”

“On second thought Peter,” Tony said. His stomach had dropped, leaving a nauseous pit. He heard his phone ring, and knew whoever was on the other end was not going to be happy with him for hanging up on Steve. “I gotta take a phone call.”