Made of Glass

“Who are you? You aren’t him… You aren’t Harrison.”

Tom blinked twice not believing what he was hearing. His eyes turned to Harrison who had a wide grin plastered on his face. At the heat from Tom’s glare, he struggled to regain his composure.

“No, darling, I’m not Harrison, but--”

“Where is he? Please I need to see him,” she begged, making him feel worthless and dejected like a forgotten toy kicked under the bed. Tom gave her a slight nod and fled the room before either of them could watch him fall apart.

Harrison finally advanced a few steps closer to the bed, so he was within her eyesight. Her face lit up with relief, and she extended a hand for him to grab onto. He paused, soaking in the reality of the situation. Y/N wanted him. Not Tom. It seemed too good to be true. What if she remembered Tom in a few days and tossed him to the side, once again? Harrison couldn’t let that happen; he wouldn’t allow it. He was ultimately handed the golden ticket with her amnesia, and he couldn’t let the opportunity go to waste.

Without another second to think, he clutched her scraped-up hand in his and held on for dear life. He held on as if he knew he would lose her the moment he let go. All he had to do was just keep holding on to her.

Her weary eyes fluttered shut, and Haz let out a deep sigh of reassurance. Tom rapped at the glass window into the room watching the scene unfold in front of him in frustration, with a feeling of helplessness. Harrison reluctantly released his hold on her and followed Tom into the hallway outside her room.

“What?” a twinge of annoyance was evident in Haz’s tone of voice.

“What do you mean, what? What the hell do you think you’re doing? She’s not yours to hold!” Tom scoffed, surprised he even had to explain his exasperation.

“And what makes you think she’s yours?” he responded, with a calm, even voice only furthering Tom’s disbelief and rage.

“In the car! Before it crashed, we kissed. We named our baby! We were going home; we were back together. We are back together!” he rushed to explain. The soft smirk on Haz’s face disappeared at the news.

“Yeah, before you crashed. What is this, the second time you almost killed the so-called love of your life?” Harrison sneered, even he was a little shocked that he let his thoughts slip out in the open. Tom’s jaw clenched as he gripped his best friend’s collar with two hands and slammed his head against the window.

“Don’t even fucking blame this on me! All you ever do is chase after everything that’s mine; fuck, just find something of your own for once, yeah?” Tom retorted, his words building up the intensity between the two of them to the extreme.

“You’re such an arrogant ass  always thinking everyone is just dying to be like you. Maybe, you just can’t see that I put myself second every day so that you can live out your dreams. I’m done doing that! What we have isn’t a friendship; I’m just an assistant to you. But not anymore, have fun living life without someone to clean up after the mess you make every time,” Haz spat, revealing the pent-up truth that had been eating away at him for years. Tom’s eyes began to water as he released his hold on his friend not just physically, but emotionally as well.

“That’s… really how you feel about me?” Tom’s voice was barely louder than a whisper at this point. Harrison shrunk at his best friend’s reaction. He considered retracting his comment and going on the way things always were, but he had reached his limit. They were already beyond broken; no amount of glue could put them back together.

“Yeah…” was all he could muster to say back. Tom’s face dropped, and he took another step backward.

“Oh… I’m sorry; I didn’t realize-- I… I’ll just leave you two together, I guess,” Tom sputtered, feeling absolutely destroyed.

“Yeah, wait--Tom,” Haz called out after him. Tom hopefully glanced back awaiting an apology or something like that.

“Maybe… I’ll see you around?” he murmured, not able to find the right words when faced with the end of the longest friendship he had ever known. The only real friendship he had ever been apart of. Everything has a breaking point, and Tom and Harrison had reached theirs.

Y/N swung her hand back and forth; her fingers intertwined in Harrisons. The cool breeze whipped her hair in all directions, and she gave up on trying to tame it. Since the accident, things with Haz seemed picture perfect, yet she couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t her life. She also felt like he was being secretive with her, and it was beyond frustrating.

She looked off to her left, and her eyes fell upon a tall bridge over a fast-moving river. Inside, something churned in her like she shared a connection to the bridge. She froze in place yanking Harrison back with her. When his eyes landed on the bridge, panic arose in him.

“Haz… Why do I know that bridge?” she questioned, hoping he would give her some real answers.

“Uh, you don’t. Well, actually, you do! It’s nothing, though. We just… sometimes go on runs over it. Sometimes, not a lot but, uh, one time you almost fell! Yeah, you were leaning over, and you slipped but I pulled you up; so it’s all good,” Harrison hurried to explain, not making much sense.

Her hands flew to her head cradling it in her hands. A flashback overcame her memory: the feeling of fear and dangling under the bridge. There was something else, too.

Sadness.

It felt deep, so deep there was no way out. So deep, it would drive her to do something reckless.

Like, jump off a bridge?

Her head turned to meet his eyes. She knew he was lying to her but why?

“Are you okay?” he asked, concerned. She shook off the feeling and nodded back up at him.

Haz wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and she leaned back into his tender touch. That memory stirred up something traumatic in her, and maybe the amnesia was a blessing. She took Harrison’s hand once again pushing any recollection of whatever happened on that bridge out of her thoughts.

Y/N carefully removed the plastic top to her coffee, and she watched as the thick cloud of steam enveloped and filled her chest with a content, bubbly warmth. Her mind began to wander, and she stared intently at the foamy surface of the hot liquid. Her fingers started to quake as she involuntarily slipped into another painful memory.

It was like a series of pictures, and emotions hit her all at once; she was just along for the ride. There was anger and resentment mixed with passion so strong it was almost out of anyone’s control. She envisioned herself splashing coffee in his face only a few feet from where she was sitting, but before that something worse. She felt rejection; he had denied knowing her after a messy history with him.

Why would Harrison do that?

Only, it didn’t seem like it was Haz who fit into her memories; it was someone different.

Tom…

He was that guy who was there when she woke up, but just the thought of his name brought hurt  and love to her heart. Questions built up one on top of the other, but there was only one she needed to answer for herself:

Who was Tom?

She closed her eyes and pictured his face, but the memories still didn’t come to her clearly. She flipped open her laptop and surfed through pictures hoping to find something of them together, but her efforts were futile. Sighing in annoyance, she almost closed it, but not before a folder caught her eye. She eagerly clicked it open and glanced over a long document titled ‘Made of Glass.’

The first few sentences drew her in right away:

I knew from the beginning that there was no place for feelings with Tom, and maybe, if I would have listened to my own advice for once, I wouldn’t be in this place. In one day, I lost a baby and jumped off a bridge neither of which would have happened if I had never met him.

She slammed her laptop shut; all of it came back to her at once. They were going to have a baby. He came back to her at the airport to get her to stay, then blamed the death on her. He beat up Haz, the same friend who saved her from drowning. Little snippets from conversations swarmed around in her consciousness; a few in particular hit her especially hard…

I’d name him Dominic after my dad.

Tom, wait, it’s not what you think!

You’re absolutely nothing, and that’s what you mean to me

A sign that we’re meant to rise above the odds stacked against us.

You’re going to be okay, please.

You killed our baby and our future!

No, please, just get back down and we can talk about this Y/N!

Her breaths grew ragged and quick; it was all too much to take in at once. She moved to leave the coffee shop, but found Harrison walking towards her with a smile on his face.

“Hey, love how are y-” she didn’t let him finish as she marched to meet him and slapped him roughly across his cheek. His fingers grazed over the growing pink wound and looked down at her in confusion.

“You lied to me! You tried to keep me from remembering everything! Was this all some twisted way of keeping me to yourself? Depriving me of my memories, so you could make my choice for me? Well, too late, consider it already made,” she yelled viciously at the man she foolishly thought was her boyfriend only hours earlier. He tried to pull her back into him and reached out to hold onto her wrist, but she forcefully pushed his hand away and ran out the door.

“Y/N, please, let me explain!” he called after her, but she didn’t stop running.

Her mind was racing as her feet somehow knew the way to Tom’s apartment even though her brain didn’t remember. She struggled to hold in her tears; she wanted to be strong and capable more than anything. Much to her surprise, she didn’t feel angry at Tom anymore. After all they had been through, she just wanted to see him again.

Her feet pounded up the stairs; out of breath, she banged her fists repeatedly on his door praying he was home. Otherwise, she had no idea what to do. The door flung open, and a puzzled Tom stood behind it. His eyes lit up with softness at her presence, and she hurried to embrace him. She buried her head into his neck, and he held her tight to his body. Her lips trembled as she turned her cheek to face him.

“I remember, Tommy; I remember all of it!” she exclaimed.