It is Wednesday my dudes. AHHHHHHH
They stood in shock before the vigilante tossing Thor’s hammer nervously between his hands. The vigilante carefully put the hammer down as if it were a bomb.
He chuckled nervously before cutting himself off as the tense silence continued.
“Sooo you didn’t want me to lift it?” He asked nervously.
Thor grinned from ear to ear and reached for the man’s handcuffs. Captain America was the one to drag him away from his solo rescue mission. The rest of the team joined them in clearing out of the room in shock.
“Did I do something wrong?” Peter called out to the departing Avengers. Natasha, being the last one to leave answered promptly, “No, you’re just a rightful ruler of Asgard.” She shrugged as if that information wasn’t important and proceeded to the door, smiling.
Peter couldn’t process that so he pretended he didn’t hear it. Yeah that was never going to work. A ruler of Asgard? No, definitely a prank.
“You’re kidding” he stated.
“Sure” she said simply and left the room
—————————————————————————-
Tony sighed in his lab when he heard FRIDAY’s voice boom through the lab.
“Sir, Mr Rogers is requesting your presence in the watch room.”
‘Great’ Tony thought as he left. He was one of many on the team who just thought that they could take the man’s mask of but of course Captain Spangles just had to object. Clearly that was going well.
He had been mulling over the information that he already had all night. The only things he knew were
1. He had a younger brother
2. He knows young people jokes (probably from his brother)
3. He’s a science nerd
4. He’s worthy
Thor had insisted that “the Man of Spiders be released” when he found out that the man was worthy. Of course, the team decided that that was the worst plan any of them had come up with. Which was hard because they were all awful.
The only plan Tony had on his mind was to take that god awful mask off of the man’s face. And that’s what he intended to do.
So when he and the team entered the room he stood closest to the arachnid just in case they came to their senses and went with his plan.
“Hey Nat” was the first thing that the very chatty vigilante said. Tony didn’t need to take off the mask to know that the man was beaming underneath it. The Russian spy nodded in his direction and replied “маленький паук”
“Hold on.” He put his hand up and looked at the two of them incredulously. “Since when are you ‘Nat’ And since when are you some Russian nickname?”
”Yeah, it took me months before I could call you Nat” the archer added.
Natasha definitely doesn’t allow just anyone to give her nicknames. “We talked last night. Neither of us could sleep” she shrugged as she plopped down in her seat as if this interaction was nothing. Tony thought otherwise.
Before he could protest, the man spoke. “And we had hot chocolate!” Tony scoffed. As if that was important.
Natasha shot the man a look “and we had some food which you-“ she shot another look, this time at Tony, a look that still sent shivers down his spine no matter how many times he had gotten it, “-didn’t give him.”
Tony scratched the back of his neck subconsciously. Yeah that had been a mistake on his part. He forgot that the tube was no longer in the man’s arm.
Still he wanted to get to the bottom of this nickname thing. “So you two are just buddies now?”
“You jealous, Stark?” The spy smirked.
Tony grumbled as he stood behind the vigilante. They weren’t getting anywhere and Fury was checking on how the interrogation was going soon. He reached forward to try to grab the man’s mask off before his arm was snatched away.
How had he seen the hand coming from behind him? Did he have eyes at the back of his head? Is that a spider thing? Ugh, creepy.
“Woah, woah!” The voice squeaked as its owner turned to face Tony. “What about the whole trust thing?”
“That’s not working out” Tony replied nonchalantly.
The man nodded in agreement. “Still, you could’ve just asked me to take my mask off.”
“Would you have?”
“No.”
Tony gave him a knowing look and the man shrugged. “Still would’ve been nice.”
“If I take my mask off, I can leave?” The man asked boldly.
“Sure thing, buddy” he lied. There would be a hell of a lot to do after that.
“Ok but I have a few questions.”
———————————————————
So, Peter knew he had two options; 1) Tell then his identity and leave? Or get arrested? Or 2) Don’t take the mask off and rot in the room in his dirty suit.
Funnily enough, option 2 sounded like more fun.
But the amount of classes he was missing was a scary thought. And what on Earth did Ned tell May? He shivered at the thought of whatever Ned could call an excuse.
“So why am I here?” Peter asked first.
The Avengers looked at each other before Shuri answered for them.
“We were given orders by Fury to find out who you are and what you’re intentions are.”
“No,” Wanda continued. “We were given orders, you just wanted to see who he was.” She sounded more amused than annoyed.
“I have to know who’s behind the mask. I’ve seen all of his fail compilations!” Shuri insisted. “And he’s cool so it’s fine.”
Peter pondered their words. Fury was the big guy from SHIELD. Yeah, Peter knew a thing or two about SHIELD. Mostly because of how much he tried to avoid them. After the whole Hydra is Shield thing happened, Peter wanted to steer clear. Also they’re big on no secret identities and that.
Yeah he could see why they’d want to ask him a few questions. In all honesty, Peter wanted to ask himself a few questions too.
Peter sighed. He really couldn’t delay the inevitable too much longer.
His hands reached towards his mask and the Avengers watched in anticipation before a loud thud resounded and a door slammed open revealing a very scary looking teenage girl.
“Seriously, you couldn’t tell me you’re identity for a year but these guys talk to you for what? A week? And you’re stripping off your mask?”
“MJ? How’d you know I was here”
Ned guiltily walked in behind her -ahh yes, that would explain it- with his head down before noticing his company and his head snapped up. So much for guilt.
“How’d you get here?” Peter asked trying and failing to not smile at Ned’s awe-struck face.
MJ gave him a look. “Right” he said realizing how stupid he was in that moment. Because she’s MJ and he’s Ned. Of course they can get into a high security facility. With the help of Ned’s hacking and her terrifying way of talking her way into and out of things they could do anything.
“No, no” Tony interrupted. “What ‘right’? How did two teenagers get passed my very expensive high tech security?”
MJ looked to Peter to explain. Ugh.
“MJ, Ned meet Tony Stark. Tony Stark, MJ and Ned.”
“How does that answer my question?” Tony asked looking slightly annoyed but more confused.
Peter sighed. “If you knew them, you’d know.”
Steve Rogers stretched out his hand to MJ. “MJ, is it?”
“Michelle Jones” she replied curtly. Yeah, he wasn’t on MJ level yet.
He turned to Ned. “Ned? Good to meet you in person.”
“Oh my god Captain America sir!”
MJ and Peter shared eye contact as Ned nerdgasmed all over the Captain. Yeah the Captain wasn’t getting out of this easily.
“Wait how do you know two teenagers?” Hawkeye asked clearly suspicious. How had they not figured this out by now?
Still he kept the lie up. Not very well. “She’s my sister” Yeah, he probably should have thought about it before pulling the old sibling card again.
“And Ned is your brother” Clint stated.
“Uh huh” was the intelligent reply.
“You and Ned don’t look alike” Tony stated the obvious.
MJ had the audacity to look offended. God, someone give her an Oscar. Peter tried and failed to suppress a smile. He just about managed not to snort as she scowled at Tony.
“Adopted. You got a problem with that?”
Tony shook his head fiercely and the other Avengers just looked baffled. Peter couldn’t blame them.
“Okay Spider-man,” MJ said through her teeth still keeping up the offended mood. “Let’s get you out of here.”