Chapter 1
I was just trying to get the water bottle from the vending machine. That's when it all went so downhill I'm sure I passed Satan on the way down.
But hey, this is what I get for trying to stay hydrated.
"Bloody - Are you serious!?" I yelled into the night, my hoodie barely keeping the crisp winds at bay with my worn out sneakers poking into my heel.
The bottle got caught on the way down, banging on it didn't help, and I wasn't about to break into a vending machine at 11:23 PM for 16 ounces of FUCKING water.
I sighed and stared at the illuminated machine, hoping for a miracle.
My third girlfriend of the last 2 months just broke up with me and honestly, I was fine living my life alone with my cat - Philip Cheeseburger Jones the IV - and a weak wage working at Kevin's Cafe, 14.25 per hour, 10 hours a day, 6 days a week.
Maybe I'm destined to live a life like this water bottle, nothing of importance, below average, stuck, and a massive disappointment.
"Ehh," I groaned as I rubbed my eyes and furrowed my eyebrows.
Another headache decided to join my Daily Metal Beatdown starting Me, and Myself.
I sighed yet again and trudged home, apartment 122 on the third floor.
I grabbed my card and felt the pulse through my head, quickly getting into the warm apartment and shrugging off my clothes for a 6 minute cold shower with a tiny amount of soap and shampoo, a used towel and into years old PJ's.
"Hey bud," I said to Philip, he meowed back in understanding.
I closed my eyes harshly - what would my mother say? The woman who gave me her life to find that she died for all that I'd become.
Philip meowed back.
"I know bud, life can be a real shit stick, but I promise I'll find a way out of this," I don't know why I lie to myself, or more importantly, my cat.
Another meow.
I scratched his ear and prepared both of our foods while checking my greasy cracked phone.
NEWS ALERT: A NEW PANDEMIC ON THE RISE - BEWARE -
I clicked to read the article, only worsening my mood.
In summary, a lot of puking, a lot of blood clots, a lot of stomach lining failure.
I know well that I don't have insurance - and it could spell the end for me if I got anything like that.
I placed my phone down and swallowed an Ibuprofen and sipped some tea while pouring the best cat food I could find with all the money I could spare.
I had 1,200 dollars set aside for Philip if anything were to happen to me, he'd go to the finest adoption center and meet lovely adopters.
It pained me to think of my own death, but it pained me more to think of anything happening to Phillip, I know it's sad but he's the most important thing in my life.
"Rwarw," Speak of the devil, Philip seemed to be a lot cuddlier today, perhaps it's the beginning of the apocalypse.
(Little did I know the humor in my ignorance).
I looked out the filthy windows of my apartment after setting my phone to charge on my duck-tapped charger.
(New York Would Never Feel The Same After They Met)