Trust Issues
The next morning Darcy stumbled into work feeling like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders.
Although she could've easily carried it in the bags beneath her eyes. She had barely slept, as a result of having chosen to delve into Loki's file and read as much as she could.
The problem was, once she'd started, she'd not been able to stop, and it was almost 4:30am by the time she'd dragged herself off to bed.
But even then, sleep hadn't come easy. Despite being achey and physically exhausted from the hiking, reading about the horrors of Loki's life had been unexpectedly emotionally draining.
Each time she closed her eyes she was assaulted with images of his sly smile, his haughty expressions, his changeling eyes that seemed to shift from blue to green, then back again.
His eyes got her the most.
They were sharp with intellect, like nothing ever got by him. Sometimes they were sultry, dangerous, come-to-bed-with-me-and-you-won't-regret-it eyes, but then the look in them switched to being childlike, twinkling, playful and innocent at a moments notice.
They also held secrets.
Like the windows to his soul, they betrayed a mournful, haunting vulnerability. They were the eyes of someone who knew too much. Someone who had seen too much. Someone who had lost too much.
But then the shutters would close, and they'd turn cold, and stormy like the sea in winter.
Okay, she really needed to stop obsessing over his eyes.
In fact, maybe she was at risk of obsessing a bit too much, over him.
But now that she'd gained further insight into his background, she felt herself sympathising with him, and all she kept thinking was, the poor guy just desperately needed a hug.
Perhaps Darcy had a rather slanted way of viewing things, but when she read of his lifelong competition with Thor, she recognised a need in him. A need to be valued, acknowledged. She could totally relate to that, having battled with her own self-worth in the past, and feelings of displacement and being overlooked.
And the part he played in the alien attack on Earth?
Well there was obviously way more to it.
After falling --quite literally -- from Asgard, he'd landed in a place like no other, and what he'd encountered there must've changed him forever.
Darcy could only liken it to taking a wrong turn and ending up in the worst possible parts of town. Except in Loki's case, it was the underworld of the universe.
He'd fallen in with a bad crowd, the absolute worst of the worst, and been cruelly manipulated. Deals had been struck. Dark, shady deals. And the rest of course, was history.
No matter how destructive he had been, and how despicable his behaviour, she couldn't help thinking he was just painfully misunderstood.
Yeah sure he was potentially dangerous, but he had been denied true companionship. He so needed that.
Someone who'd be none judgemental, open minded, and willing to offer support, and genuine friendship.
Well, the way she figured it, Loki was pretty much her responsibility now.
It was her job to keep him in-check, and she was the one who probably spent the most time with him.
Which meant she was the obvious candidate for the task.
She could be Loki's friend. His playmate.His buddy.
And whilst this wasn't exactly part of her job description, she wasn't going to treat this as purely a work-related challenge.
Taming the trickster was one thing. Earning his trust, respect and friendship, was another. And this was on a completely personal level.
All he needed was someone to give him a break.
To actually trust him, and give him a chance to prove himself.
Trust could be earned. She wasn't going to write him off like so many others had.
So, as she made her way out of the elevator, she already knew that she would agree to help Loki try and resolve this Tesseract situation. Because that's what friends did, help each other out. Not that she was about to agree to anything without knowing all the details first. But she was open to hearing what plans he had in mind.
As much as she hated going against her bosses, maybe if they were clever about it they could pull it off without being found out.
She knew Loki well enough to know that he'd not doubt have some plan up his leather sleeve.
And as long as she had the controller, well, he'd have to behave himself.
Just then, Tony came out of the room he predominantly used as his office, and shattered her thoughts. "Darcy, have you got a minute?"
"Sure." She forced a smile, but her stomach clenched with anxiety.
Shit.
Being called into the bosses' office was never a good thing.
Not for her anyway.
They went inside, and she closed the door behind her.
"I heard you paid our resident God of Mischief a visit yesterday." He remarked, taking a seat behind his desk.
Fuck.
The guards had obviously ratted on her.
Bastards.
Darcy shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. "Yeah? I didn't think I was breaking any rules or anything."
"No need to look so worried. Technically you haven't....however, there was a reason for me giving you the day off the other day. After our little chat, I thought it over and decided it might be in your best interests to....well...put a bit of distance between the two of you."
Darcy readjusted her glasses nervously. "W-why? I mean, why is that? I haven't done anything wrong. He hasn't done anything-"
"You don't see the way he looks at you." He blurted, looking slightly uncomfortable. "Perhaps you didn't notice, but he was eyeing you up in a way that...well, isn't entirely appropriate. I know from experience of course, having done it myself in the workplace enough times over the years."
Her eyes widened, unable to believe what she was hearing. He had to be mistaken. "Um, I'm not sure I understand what you mean. I can't imagine L looking at me in any particular way. I mean, sometimes he looks like he wants to kill me. Other times he looks down his nose at me-"
"Wait, wait a minute. You call him, 'L'? Did I hear that right?"
She nodded. "Yeah it's just a nickname that's all. You have a few of your own for him. Well for everyone actually. In fact I dread to think what you might call me." She laughed, hoping to lighten the conversation a little.
Tony looked at her doubtfully. "As much as that is true, I'm not an attractive girl like yourself. Seriously, Darcy. Be careful. I'm concerned you're getting a little bit too familiar."
"Have I done something wrong? 'Cause I kinda feel like I'm in trouble, but I don't know what for."
Shaking his head, Tony got up and perched on the edge of his desk. "Not at all, sweetheart. Listen, I'm just trying to look out for you, that's all."
Darcy frowned. "You make it sound like he's a danger to me."
"He's a danger to himself. So yeah I'll give you that. Seriously, he should come with a hazard warning."
"He might not be all that bad. I'm not scared of him. And I don't believe he would hurt me."
Tony flashed his usual flirtatious smile. "I gotta admire his ability to charm. I'm almost....envious. Or rather I would be, if I wasn't blessed with copious amounts of charisma myself."
Darcy smiled thinly, but couldn't help feeling slightly defensive. "He....he hasn't charmed me. I'm not easily impressed."
"Good. Glad to hear it. Because I don't want him getting inside your head. Or under your skin. Whichever. Which is why I'm taking you off Mischief-minding duties for awhile."
"Wait, are you firing me?" She cried.
"I never said that."
"Well you may as well have. God-sitting is what I was hired to do....apparently...so if I'm not doing that, well that means I'm out of a job."
"We'll find something else for you to do. Are you any good with admin?"
She stared at him stoically, so he hastily retracted his last question. "Okay scratch that. How about, you take a couple days off, that's all. With full pay. Come on, you can't say fairer than that? No one in their right mind would turn their nose up at an offer like this."
"Wow. You really are desperate to get rid of me aren't you?" She said, slightly embittered. "That's kinda hurtful."
Tony puffed out his cheeks, looking decidedly awkward now. "Darcy, please. You're killing me here. It's nothing personal. I just need Reindeer Games to cool his nuts a bit. D'you see what I'm saying?"
She made a face. "Um, no. But fine. Whatever."
His face split into a wide grin. "Fantastic. Atta' girl. Thanks for that. Now go, get outta here. Make the most of your time off. Go home and de-trickster yourself, before you catch crazy or something." He laughed jovially, amused by his own humour.
Darcy nodded again, then left. Feeling more than just a little deflated.
This was all so weird.
What the heck was he even talking about?
Loki was not getting inside her head. Like she'd ever allow that.
And there was no chance of her catching crazy. She was the one who ought to come with a warning sticker.
And as for him looking at her inappropriately....well, that was just the most hilarious thing she'd ever heard.
She was just making her way passed the lounge, when she caught sight of the man in question. His dark figure looming just beyond the glass in the steel-framed door.
He threw her a quizzical look, and she shrugged her shoulders haplessly. Tilting his head to one side, he crooked his finger and beckoned her over.
Warily, she made her way to the door and hurriedly punched the security code into the panel.
The door buzzed, opened, and Loki stepped aside for her, but she held her hands up.
"Sorry dude. I'm not allowed to play today. I'm being sent home." She informed him, rather sadly.
To her slight astonishment, he looked as disappointed as she felt.
"Why?"
"I dunno." She lied grossly, deliberately avoiding meeting his eyes. "But it doesn't really matter. I gotta go. So I guess I'll see you in a day or two-"
"No."
She frowned. "No?"
"We may be able to use this to our advantage. But we have to act fast, Miss Lewis....Here." He thrust the controller into her hand, and before she had time to figure out what was happening, he was slinking out through the door, stealthy as a cat.
"Wait! Hang on a sec! What are you doing? Loki!"
"Sshh."
"Don't shush me! You need to get back in there right now. We can't....we can't do this. Not yet anyway." She protested, as she scurried after him.
He was already off, marching down the hallway, taking long, purposeful strides. And seeing as his legs were like double the length of hers, it gave him a rather unfair advantage.
"Don't worry, everything is in place. My mindless minder is preoccupied at present. Stranded in the bathroom, having quite unexpectedly been stricken down with a formidable case of diarrhoea."
She could hear the merriment in his voice, which suggested he had something to do with the poor guards' present condition.
"And I've created a duplicate of myself, which is currently 'reading' in my quarters." He continued, as he proceeded to use his magical abilities to shape-shift into Jane -- of all people.
Darcy's jaw dropped. "Shit. You've thought of everything haven't you?"
"Indeed I have." He said proudly.
She stared at him, her mind boggling. It was bizarre seeing the form of her friend, speaking with Loki's voice. And as strange, and potentially hazardous as the situation was, she couldn't help being impressed by his thoroughness, and his enviably cool magical skills.
The elevator arrived, and they both stepped inside. He noticed the way she was staring, and raised an eyebrow. Which was funny. Because the face may have been different, but the mannerisms were still very much his own.
"What?" He demanded.
"Nothing, just....that's so awesome! Could you turn me into someone?"
His lips quirked in amusement. "It's just an illusion. You don't actually become the person. But yes I could, but there's no need. I'm the one who needs the disguise."
"Aw. That's no fun."
It hit her then that she was allowing herself to become distracted.
Which was bad.
The elevator was making it's rapid, smooth descent, and her stomach churned nauseatingly. Everything seemed to be moving at hyper-speed, spiralling out of control, and if she let him walk out of this elevator, and out of this building, then the outcome could be disastrous.
It wasn't supposed to happen like this. He'd given her no time to think or prepare.
And she had to do something to remedy the situation fast, whilst she still could.
"Loki, I know you're all fired up but we can't do this! Come on, you've been doing so well. Don't spoil things now." She pleaded.
"Spoil things? Don't be silly, Miss Lewis. We're saving the planet. Surely you're willing to take a small risk for that? Wouldn't you like to prove yourself to your work colleagues? You're being given the opportunity to do something meaningful."
The elevator reached the ground, and the doors opened.
"Wait, how do I know that this isn't just one of your tricks!" She clutched at his arm in desperation as they exited into the lobby. "You've stabbed your own brother in the back, possibly quite literally, plenty of times."
"He's only an adopted brother."
"Whatever. If you can betray him, you'll betray me."
"True. I suppose you'll just have to trust that I won't."
Spurred on by desperation and annoyance, Darcy found the physical strength and courage to grip hold of the front of 'Jane's' coat, and using all her strength, succeeded in shoving Loki backwards, through a side door. Though he obviously allowed himself to be, as he put up no resistance.
"Trust you? That's a bit of a big ask don't you think? Especially when it feels like you're not giving me a choice or any time to think!"
The golden shimmering glow of Loki's magic melted away the illusion, and lit up the cramped confines of the surroundings they found themselves in, which appeared to be a disused utilities closet. They were now standing toe-to-toe, and she was yet to relinquish the hold she had on his leather tunic.
"A broom cupboard? Really? How terribly clichéd." He arched an eyebrow sardonically. "Please tell me you're not going to attempt to kiss me, Miss Lewis. I'd like to think you'd come up with something a little more imaginative than this."
"Shut up!" She snapped, though she was thankful that the dim light in the small room prevented her blushes from being detectable.
No one else made her blush like he did, infuriating little shit.
"You have absolutely nothing to fear." He said reassuringly. Except Darcy didn't find this at all reassuring. "No one will discover anything amiss. I even exchanged controllers without anyone noticing. I had the real one in my possession throughout the entirety of night. What they actually have is a duplicate. A spare one from Sakaar, which isn't linked to my obedience disk at all."
Darcy eyed him sceptically.
"Don't you see what I'm saying? If I intended to flee I could have made my escape before now. And I wouldn't have willingly surrendered the controller over to you. I'm still at your mercy, Miss Lewis."
"I only have your word for that. What if you've given me the fake one? For all I know you could have a bunch of them stashed away somewhere."
He leaned toward her slightly, causing his dark hair to fall forward over one shoulder and tickle her face. "You want me to prove my sincerity? Alright. Hit the button."
"What? No. I don't really want to zap you unless I have to."
"Well you have to, in order to put your mind at ease."
"No. I feel so mean."
"There's nothing else for it. We're wasting time here. Hit the damn button, and see." He challenged.
She sighed, feeling completely torn. "Are you just telling me to do that because you don't think I will? Because I will."
"Fine. Then do it."
She held the controller up, her thumb poised over the button.
A tense silence stretched on, until Loki seemingly grew tired of waiting....
"Do it!" He yelled, right into her face.
The sudden, menacing rise in his voice startled Darcy and prompted her into action. She activated the disk, sending a searing jolt through his body with a formidable crackle.
"Shit! You weren't kidding!" She gasped, seeing all his nerve-endings and muscles flexing violently.
She hit the deactivate button just in time before his tall body surged forwards, and he immediately went limp, sagging against her.
Catching him awkwardly around the middle, she struggled to hold him upright. He was deceptively heavier than he looked.
"Satisfied?" He hissed, as he fought to suck in a shaky breath.
She nodded feebly, holding her own breath as his large hands went to her shoulders in an attempt to steady himself.
"I hope this isn't your way of making a move on me." She joked clumsily, hoping to dispel the awkwardness she felt at having their bodies pressed close together. "Seems a bit extreme if it is. Not to mention, clichéd of course, us being in a closet and all."
To her immense surprise, he actually laughed at that. And she felt it rumble through his chest.
"As I said, you have nothing to fear. On any account." Recovering the starch in his legs, he regained his footing, and hoisted himself upright again.
"Hey, sorry for not trusting you." She told him kindly, all joking aside.
"Apology accepted. In all honesty I didn't believe you would actually do it." He gave her a slow, wicked smile. "I'm impressed."
**************
After leaving the tower, the pair took the subway across town.
Loki moaned on endlessly about the unacceptable, 'filthy' conditions, like any true aristocrat with a superiority complex, and Darcy did a fine job of ignoring him.
Instead she found herself absentmindedly admiring his long legs, which were stretched out in front of him, accentuated by the fitted, smart black trousers he was wearing.
He was clad entirely in black -- an illusion of course -- but it made a refreshing change seeing him dressed in something other than his trademark leather.
Not that the leather wasn't aesthetically pleasing either, but the suit added a whole new dimension to his mystique.
"Look at you, all smart and everything." She remarked with a grin, after he'd transformed his appearance. "Very Goth-Gangster. Which isn't an easy look to pull-off, but you totally do."
His eyebrows shot up sharply. "Is that a compliment? If so, I'm....flattered." He then made a point of dragging his eyes over her deliberately slowly. Lingering appreciatively on her legs. "You're looking exceedingly better than yesterday. Please don't ever wear that monstrosity again in my presence."
"That was my hiking gear. It isn't supposed to be glamorous."
"To hell with glamour. That outfit is a disgrace to humanity."
She rolled her eyes, and pretended to grow bored of the conversation.
His Asgardian snobbery no longer surprised her. He was snooty to the max, and she knew that.
But she was questioning her choice of outfit now. Because whilst she often wore skirts, this one was one she usually saved as best. It was a burgundy, soft suede, belted number. And she knew the little block-heeled ankle boots showed off more leg than her usual knee boots.
And Loki had undoubtedly noticed.
Ugh.
Why had she gone all out on her look, in order to overcompensate for how drab she'd looked yesterday?
This was Loki.
His opinion mattered nothing to her.
Or at least, it shouldn't.
After alighting the train, they made their way on foot for a short distance, until they finally arrived at their destination.
"Is this it then? The place where the wizard-guy lives?"
Loki nodded. "Yes. And knowing him, he'll already be aware of our arrival."
Darcy looked at him nervously. She could sense his apprehension, as he faltered slightly, delaying the inevitable. It was as if he was reluctant to perform the mundane, straightforward task of knocking the door.
"Do you think he'll help?" She asked.
He took a deep breath, preparing himself. "There's only one way to find out."
And with that, he reached up to lift the heavy door-knocker of 177A Bleecker Street.