Day 85
He drifted through the sky. He was alone. Time had become nothing to him. He had no need for it. Today? Tomorrow? An hour? A minute? It didn't matter it all felt like a lifetime, and an instant all at the same time. Tony’s mind drifted just like him. The only difference was that his mind was home, and he was not. He traveled across the stars, and he was back. His life. His choices. His mistakes. His attempts to save the world. To hold it in his hands. To bare its weight upon his back. His failure. Why was he here? Why had Strange sacrificed half the universe for his sake? Especially if he was going to die here? Alone. There was no point. Maybe Strange hadn’t seen a future where they won. Maybe he had only seen Tony’s predestined fate that was written in the stars. His fate to die among the distant cold lights that tormented him. Maybe Strange’s last act was to carry out the universe’s final wish for him.
Red light danced inside the ship, shining through the windows. Tony rose slowly to his feet and made his way to the window. Outside a nebula danced. Red and angry. Beautiful and terrible. Tony lowered himself to the ground, and leaned against the window. The universe, the galaxy, the stars, space, all of it was so beautiful. Tony hated it.
“Hey miss Potts…” Tony sighed. He had a day of oxygen left. What he was about to say would be the last thing he would ever say to the love of his life. Tony had thought about starting the message differently, but starting with Miss Potts seemed the right way to go. It was just like it had been before Thanos, before the war, before Ultron, before the Avengers, before Iron Man, before the cave in Afghanistan. He wanted it the way things had been before his world had been rocked and torn apart and put back together, and destroyed again. He wanted it like when they had been young and innocent. More than anything he wanted that time back.
“If you’re seeing this, don’t feel bad,” This wasn't her fault. This was his choice. His fate. It was always going to be like this. The stars willed it so. It wasn't something that could be fought. He needed Pepper to know that he was okay with this.
“Part of the journey is the end.”
He knew from the start. From the time he first put on his suit of armor he knew that it was always just a means to the end. A path to the end of his journey, a ride there. His journey here had been so long yet far to short. He had hoped for far more than he knew would ever be possible. Love. Family. A child. Now he had no hope. His journey would end here and he was ready.
“Just for the record drifting through space with zero promise of rescue is more fun than it sounds.”
Space had been amazing and horrible. Gorgeous and terrifying. It wasn't actually the worst place to die. At least he had a good view from his casket. Not even the pharaohs in their tombs of gold could have dreamed of such a beautiful resting place.
“Food and water ran out four days ago.” he needed Pepper to know that he fought so hard for her. He had tried for so long to survive, to see her face again. He sighed.
“Oxygen will run out tomorrow.”
He finally admitted it to himself. Tomorrow he would die.
“That’ll be it.”
His end. His journey finally drawing to a close.
“When I drift off,” He was going to drift away into an unwakeable sleep. No pain. Just peace. Finally peace.
“I’ll dream of you.”
He would drift away for eternity, and in that eternity he would dream of her. Forever it the stars. It was always her.
“It’s always you.”
Time slipped by in a blazing eternity. Each breath drew less and less air. He got more and more drowsy. And finally the eternity burned itself out, and Tony drifted away from consciousness. And as promised he dreamed of his love.