Carrot Girl
Flashback:
“Eir, you have scheduled for talk tomorrow morning. Sa PUP ang talk which is for theater artist like you before. You’ll do a great job here, so please rest agad pagdating sa bahay.” kevin, my manager reminded me.
I just nodded my head and let my eyes close as I settled myself on the car seat.
It’s been an exhausting day for me.
I went home earlier than usual. Throwing myself on bed and slept for 3 hours.
When I woke up, I took a half bath and went to my kitchen, cooking something for myself.
I was about to go over straight to the kitchen when my eyes landed on something.
An invitation wraps in a red ribbon and a note beside it.
As I walk closer to the table, my heart becomes heavy and so my throat went dry.
I picked it up as my hand was shaking while opening the envelop.
‘With their Families, MARK & ELLE’
“Invite you to the celebration on their marriage” I whisper as tears come flooding on my eyes.
I chuckled bitterly as I stare at the names bolded on the paper.
I look down to see what’s the note was about while wiping my tears.
I pick it up, a subtle cry escapes my mouth as I read it.
‘Hi eir, hindi na kita maantay nasa labas lang ng bahay si mark. Hope you can come. I know we didn’t talk about us before this happen.
But I hope we can get the closure someday. I know I became hard all the time and I think this will be the best way karma will get me.
Don’t forgive me, let me suffer for this decision first. But when the time comes that you do, please tell me so that I can really move on.
I’m sorry I demanded something that I know you couldn’t do yet. But I can, right? Even just a little bit of it.
I’m sorry for thinking that our situation can’t be enough for me, and for thinking that I deserve better.
But please, when you found someone who will boast out the courage in you, don’t let her lose on your hand like how you lost mine.
Please be safe pea. And don’t worry, I’m starting to learn loving your best friend.’
- ELLE
As I finished reading the note, I weakly went to kitchen and put my arms at the counter and place my head on it.
I cry my heart out, not wanting to move even a little bit.
And when I think there is nothing left to cry out, I stood up and went to the radio beside the countertop.
I open it and ‘Ang Huling El Bimbo’ play filling every side of the room.
I stopped the tears that wanted to escape from my eyes again.
I immediately busied myself, beginning to cook to divert my attention from the pain.
Food was always and will always be my comfort when things happen.
After I cook and ate the stuff I made. I went to bed and let my thoughts fly for a moment.
I took sleeping pills when I think that I can’t get enough sleep because of what happen today.
.
.
I woke up around 6 in the morning due to continues doorbell ringing.
Tumayo ako at sumilip sa bintana para tingnan kung sino iyon.
When I saw my manager, I immediately panic when I remember the talk he was talking yesterday.
I quickly run down the stairs and open the door for him.
“Oh god! I knew it! You overslept!” windang na bungad nito
“Buti nalang inagahan ko rin ngayon pumunta. Sige na magbihis ka na, medyo malayo pa byahe natin. Nainform ko narin yung mga organizer na baka malate ka ng unti. Hay naku!” madamdaming patuloy pa nito
“I’m sorry Kev, the pills were strong today” I said as I gesture a peace sign to him before running back to my room for my daily routine.
It took me an hour to fix myself. Since it’s a talk and in school, I make myself formal yet simple.
I just wear over all white tux and just let my hair down.
I also wear a simple make up that will enhance my natural beauty.
When I’m tired looking at myself, I walk down and let kevin know that I’m ready.
.
.
We arrived at the session hall on time for the last performance before my talk. I hear people screaming names that I don’t know.
They didn’t know I was here already, that’s why their eyes were fixed on the band gearing up on the stage.
I settled my eyes on the stage to fully recover from the sudden darkness occupying my eyes.
“Hello everyone!” the girl with the piano greeted.
As she smiles widely, the crowd becomes wild.
Some guys were taking photos and videos while girls were screaming hard.
“Ahh! sam ako nalang! Ako nalang bebe mo! I volunteer!” one of the fangirls far beside me scream.
I chuckled as I observed some more.
“Beh respeto, yung jowa yung bassist!” suway naman ng isa pa nitong kasama
“Grabe ang wild naman ng crowd! Ibang level energy nyo ah!” the girl on the stage continues.
“Before we perform in front of you, magpapakilala lang po muna kami. Sa mga hindi nakakakilala sa amin,we are the ‘close band’, wag nyo na po kami tanungin kung bakit ganun ang pangalan. Medyo nakainom po kasi leader naming that time,” she said laughing at her on joke.
“Hi, I’m Sam and I’m in charge of piano. My lovey Rim for the bass, the crazy Ino for the drums.”
After she said that, everyone become wilder when there’s a girl suddenly running up the stage.
The girl was sweating, but her handsomeness doesn’t even lessen.
She has the black cat aura inside her yet she’s cute in her little uniform.
“And here she is! Our leader, vocalist and lead guitarist, H!”
More people scream as the hall was like having a massive earthquake.
She picks up the electric guitar and fixed it on her shoulder before throwing a wink on the audience.
“H! mahal kita! Tanggap ko nang walang mabubuntis sating dalawa kapag naging asawa kita! Okay lang! healthy family planning!”
“H! okay lang saking maging pusa anak natin basta ikaw nanay nila!”
“H! sabihin mo lang, itatanan kita kahit ngayon na!”
“H! wag kang kumindat please! May nalalaglag sa baba ko!”
I find it amusing hearing those sides comment from the girls and not from the guys.
‘I think she’s popular to the girls. True poganda’
I again fix my eyes on the band and settled my focus on the girl fixing the stand mic in front of her.
“Hello everyone. I’m sorry I’m late. Tinapos ko pa yung plates ng future bahay namin ng invisible jowa ko eh” she said chuckling at her on remarks.
“By the way, since wala pa naman ang crush ko dito, ahem magrakrakan muna tayo. Mamaya na yung medyo normal na banda, shy type ako eh.”
She strum the guitar first before raising her hand and count.
“let’s start! In 1,2,3!”
A familiar tune filled my ears as the guitar lead the whole band.
Her hand was like dancing while strumming every guitar string in her hand.
“Nakita kita sa isang magasin
Dilaw ang 'yong suot
At buhok mo'y green
Isang tindahan sa may Baclaran
Napatingin natulala
Sa iyong kagandahan”
I never imagine that this song will suit in a girl’s voice.
A little squeak on her raspy voice gave more elegance to the song.
“Naaalala mo pa ba noong tayo pang dalawa
'Di ko inakalang sisikat ka
Tinawanan pa kita
Tinawag mo akong walanghiya
Medyo pangit ka pa noon
Ngunit ngayon”
I didn’t realize that I was smiling as I look at her.
Her smile somehow gave some comfort in me.
It was weird, but in a good way.
“Hey! Iba na ang 'yong ngiti
Iba na ang 'yong tingin
Nagbago nang lahat sa'yo
Sana'y hindi nakita
Sana'y walang problema
Pagkat kulang ang dala kong pera…
Pambili oh
Pambili sa mukha mong maganda”
I was nodding as I hum the song in my head.
I rested my head on the wall in my right side while I never left my eyes on her.
“Siguro ay may kotse ka na ngayon
Rumarampa sa entablado
Damit mo'y gawa ni Sotto
Siguro'y malapit ka na ring sumali
Sa Supermodel of the Whole wide Universe
Kasi…”
She walks at the edge of the stage when the drummer sang next.
She sits on it while encouraging the crowd to sing along with them.
“Iba na ang 'yong ngiti
Iba na ang 'yong tingin
Nagbago nang lahat sa'yo
Sana'y hindi nakita
Sana'y walang problema
Pagkat kulang ang dala kong pera”
All of them sang the chorus while she’s just smiling and living her life strumming the guitar.
She played it like it was her life.
She closes her eyes and I’m amazed on how she still gets the tune on the instrumental part.
The music suddenly stopped.
She gets back on her place earlier and grab the mic on both hands.
She combs her hair upwards as she loosens the first button of her uniform.
I saw how her sweat was traveling from her head down to her face.
‘Okay, I admit. Hot. ‘
The piano slowly transcends as she sang the next part.
“Nakita kita sa isang magasin
At sa sobrang gulat 'di ko napansin
Bastos pala ang pamagat
Dali-daliang binuklat
At ako'y namulat sa hubad na katotohanan…
Let’s go!”
The crowd even become wilder than before.
Some was jumping while other was screaming the song more.
“Iba na ang 'yong ngiti
Iba na ang 'yong tingin
Nagbago nang lahat sa'yo
Sana'y hindi nakita
Sana'y walang problema
Pagkat kulang ang dala kong pera yeah”
The pianist and bassist singing together while the girl walk to the drummer shaking her head.
“Iba na ang 'yong ngiti
Iba na ang 'yong tingin
Nagbago nang lahat sa'yo oh
Sana'y hindi nakita
Sana'y walang problema
Pagkat kulang ang dala kong pera
Pambili oh
Pambili sa mukha mong maganda”
The music stopped again, but the piano remained.
She gets back on her place and sing the last part of the song.
Her voice filled the four corners of the hall.
I feel a little bit of summersault when she licks her lips then smile after.
“Nasan ka na kaya
Sana ay masaya
Sana sa susunod na issue
Ay centerfold ka na ah
Oh”
As she ends the song, her eyes suddenly met mine.
A second of shock was written on her face before she immediately diverts her attention to the crowd.
I chuckled at the gesture.
'cute’
The pianist ended their performance with the last greeting before they go back to the backstage.
After the performance it’s my time to do the talk.
As I was called to be up on the stage, I hear crowd cheering and yelling like earlier.
But I bet the wildness of the crowd was more formal and settled right now, which made me laugh inwardly.
‘Parang kanina ang wild pa nila. Ngayong mukha na talaga silang mabuting estudyante’
I do my talk for an hour and as I end, I answers some questions from every student.
“Thank you again for inviting me to be here. To be able to inspire you all about my life and talk about my success.
I hope I’ll get invited again to share another future milestone that I will accomplish.”
The hall was filled with claps and cheers after I left the stage.
Another performance was done before the event take its end.
I made my way out of the hall while waving and bowing.
I smile to every person my hand touches and saying encouraging words to them.
I enter my car and was about to sign the driver to go when I hear knocks from the other side.
I saw the girl singing earlier with her band continuously knocking on the window.
I contemplates whether to open it or not, but I still open it when I hear her shout my name.
“h-hi…” she said almost whispering when she saw me.
“hall ano ba? Titignan mo nalang ba? Bigay mo na bilis, kahit ang weird nyang ibibigay mo.” singit naman ng drummer kanina
Tinignan sya nito ng masama at tindayakan sa paa.
“pwede manahimik. Pag di babae, di belong, alis!” pantataboy nito
Natatawang kinuha ko ulit ang atensyon nito sa pamamagitan ng pagtikhim.
“ahh… wews, panu ba? Bahala na!” narinig ko pang sabi nito bago nito inilahad sa akin ang isag bugkos ng...
"carrot?" I whsipered
Nagtatakang tinignan ko ito habang tinatanggap ang nakalahad sa harapan ko.
“ahmm… ano. Naalala ko lang kasi si snowball sayo. Kamukha nyo po yun! Bye!” mabilis na sabi nito bago patakbong pumasok sa katapat na building.
I was stunned for a moment before her words register on me.
‘The who now?’
I was about to get my phone and search it when one of her bandmates talk.
“ahm… pasensya na po sa abala ma’am, fan nyo lang po talaga yung tropa namin. Tsaka po, crush nya po si snowball kaya double meaning po yung sinabi nya” nahihiyang imporma naman ng babeng pianist.
I smile at them.
“Tell her, thank you. Even if I don’t know whose snowball is. I appreciate the carrot” said chuckling because of the weird gift.
They wave their goodbyes as I waved mine.
I put the carrot on the back of my seat and put my phone out and went to google.
I’ve search for the ‘snowball’ and was greeted by a literal snowball.
My brows furrowed as my manager peek on my phone.
“baka they mean the snowball rabbit from ‘the secret life of pets’” he said that made me look at him.
“My niece loves that movie, and she’s one of snowball’s little apologist” he continue, before chuckling when remember his niece.
I type ‘snowball rabbit’ was greeted by a cute cartoon character little white rabbit.
His color and texture seem like cuddly and warm.
I smile as I zoom in on the rabbit wherein it was holding a piece of carrot.
I love how its eyes are twinkling while holding it.
“Cute little carrot” I murmured as I download the photo and set it as my lock screen.
“Fairness, kamukha mo nga.” Kevin says that made me smile even wider.