IT
They were like a group of hyperactive siblings.
Which he didn’t like that analogy because A.) they already had enough parental/family issues as it was; and B.) That would kinda make him the baby of the family, but that would also make the rest of these unimaginably immature adults his older siblings. Like they were protective but would set your suit on fire for kicks. While you were in it. While it was a good - and highly accurate - analogy, he still didn’t like it.
Much like many siblings - in normal, non-vigilante families, something they were very much not, because they weren’t a family - they were highly competitive when playing games. Like tag, no one knows what starts it - usually the impulsive urge that gets them into deadly explosive situations, don’t ask them it’s an engrained thing (like a family. No, shut up Wade, get out of my Third Person POV bitch). The game went on all night, and even if you were off you were playing - as per all their games and rule 17(Stupid games and competitions are applied to everyone. Even if you don’t want to play or don’t know you are playing. No Exclusion or Dropping out, if you even have a remote connection - you are on the board and WILL be judged. This is non-negotiable.) Whoever was ‘it’ by sunrise (aka 7:00am, promptly) had to buy drinks for everyone. As per tradition.
Which was a losing ticket because they drank...a lot.
They had issues, okay?!
Anyway, tag was a normal fun, civilized game in which-
“Tag!”
“Oh no you did not.” Not fair, he was monologuing internally! You take too long. I said to get out, wait your turn-
If you were it when they were playing tag, it was like you had the worst illness in the world and everyone just disappeared. It was a devastating lonely, and isolating state to be in. Truly a tragic fate.
Which is why...
__O__
Peter swung down on Ironfist taking down a mugger and bonked the top of his head.
“Tag!”
That was his fault, he left himself wide open for attack. Taking on that mugging, ha that fool.
“No fair! I was working!” Ironfist said indignantly, staring up at Peter as he swung away laughing. The tag backs rule most certainly applied.
All's fair in love and war, Rand.
“Loser speak!” Peter laughed as he flipped in the air, shooting a web toward the next building to make his escape.
He was safe…
...For now
__O__
“I swear to god if you even try Rand…”
“No names.” Ironfist smirked as he crept closer. It was a bold move, going after the probably most feared of them all. Daring even, but he had been ‘it’ for 30 minutes and he was getting desperate. He could not show his face until this burden was lifted.
“It’s a suicide mission!” he heard Spiderman’s voice from the perch he sat on top of, safely out of distance from being tagged, or else he would’ve been. He was about to witness a murder if he didn’t act quickly.
“Tag.” Danny gently poked the small of Jess’ back and ran like hell.
It was worth the future disembowelment.
__O__
“Cable let’s talk about this.”
Deadpool tried to negotiate futility. The cyborg man , stalking forward, trapping Deadpool between crates. Another common mistake, not knowing the dead ends.
It’ll get you killed in this world…
That was a little too real actually uhhh. Oh no you don’t, you little shit. Pay back bitch.
Anyway, point is: negotiation is for suckers and you should always use violence.
“Tag bitch.” Cable said in a raspy voice as he blasted Deadpool with a plasma blast knocking him back into the wall - mildly disoriented. As Wade was trying to recover he tapped him and walked away.
Why did Cable have to make everything so dramatic?
__O__
He was stalking his prey like a predator in the wild.
The other man was completely unassuming as the devil creeped on him from the shadows. Lurking closer with every step, careful; he couldn’t make the slightest noise or else he’d be found out. Fool, he was looking at pictures of his dead child - completely vulnerable for attack.
“Tag.”
Daredevil said quickly and quietly before he ran like hell, because not even a second later Punisher was up and two more and his guns were out and shooting into the night.
“You’re dead Murdock!” the Punisher called out over the gunfire.
“No names on the field!” Daredevil called back to him, and all he got was a series of feral shouts.
Honestly, that was like rule 1; c’mon Castle be better.
__O__
Domino wasn’t fair.
Just her existence, but especially when they were playing these stupidhighly important and compltely nessasary games. It wasn’t fair because Domino never lost tag, never even got to be ‘it’. Not once. No one could get her.
And she always indulged in the glory, she never outright won - well she did when she was trying. But she never lost either. Ever. And she didn’t even have to try.
What doubly sucked is that her fortune left them - or whoever was in closest proximity to her - in misfortune. So even if she wasn’t ‘it’, she was still treated like the plague.
“Domino, 12 o’clo-” it was too late.
“Hey guys!” the woman chirped as she landed behind them on a roof top - it was 3am, so everyone knew what was up by now, coincidentally everyone was out on patrol or a case or something; they would never start a game without all possible participants present. If they didn’t know what was up, then… well sucks to suck.
But anyway the grave matter at hand needed to be dealt with.
“Scatter!”
__O__
“It spotted at nine o clock, Cage.”
“Run bitch run!”
“He’s not gonna make it”
“Oh so you use my highly advanced secure communication system?” Peter growled into his own comm “To gang up on me when we play tag? But when I need backup on a drug bust the line is dead. Wow, okay I see how it is.” he huffed. They only used comms on group cases, but they didn’t actually use them. He understood, it made them too ‘united’ and none of them liked the idea of teamwork - the Defenders were a hot mess - but that wasn’t the point. Honestly, it’s like they had no appreciation for his genius and innovation. He zeroed in on Cage’s slightly panicked and keyed up form. He was a dead man.
“We’ve been compromised.” he heard Cable’s surly voice come through and all the comms simultaneously click off.
“Wow, no respect I swear to the tennis ball.” he grumbled and then he heard a comm link click on.
“Don’t say god’s name in vain.” Wade popped in and clicked off. The audacity. And Luke had heard him and was now running in the opposite direction, Peter jumped out of his shadowy hiding spot.
“GET BACK HERE YOU COWARD AND FACE ME LIKE A MAN!” he yelled out to the sky and promptly swung furiously down to the nearest moving object.
Seriously, he was pissed off now.
__O__
Luke ended up buying everyone drinks.
Probably for the best, he was the most financially responsible.
Can’t wait for next month's round.