Settling in

A week in Dc with Sam wasn't his choice and it was even less sams but until things were settled with Tony about the tower he had no choice. Steve dropped him off thanking Sam and even gave him a paper with some info about Bucky that might be helpful. "Ok mom I got this. He'll be fine. You go suck up to Stark. Get in here Barnes."

He showed Bucky his room. It was the first time he actually truly was able to take a good hard look at the man. He was thin, not in a good way. He had the same look of.tiredness Steve used to wear before he begged him to seek out counseling. his clothes were threadbare and he was certain it was the same clothes he was wearing when they grabbed him in Bucharest. "Well I'll let you get settled. Come down stairs we can figure out dinner."
"Not hungry thanks."

Oh great he thought. Things weren't as good as Steve claimed. He didn't argue just made it clear he would wait for him downstairs. He took a look at Steve's note and his was getting angry reading it. Steve was so scared of pushing him away that he pretty much allowed Bucky to maintain some rather unhealthy coping routines. He had a week to work on this. It would be a challenge but it wasn't impossible.

He waited an hour and finally went upstairs to retrieve Bucky. "Ok soldier. We are stuck together for a week and I ain't babysitting a bump on a log. So first things first, we gotta get you some new clothes. Can't believe Steve let you be seen in those rags. So we are gonna go to a thrift store since chances are you hate the mall, and at least get you a few things. After that we can get some food. What do you like to eat?" He froze at the question. "I ...don't know." He smiled "That's fine. Sometimes it takes time to get there. We can try different things during the week. You can keep a running list of what you do like. I won't make you do something you aren't comfortable with but you gotta step out a little bit." He patted his shoulder as they headed out the door.

The thrift shop was more telling than he expected it to be. He had no idea what size clothes to buy which meant he had to try them on. After he found some pants and a few shirts he went near a dressing room. He couldn't bring himself to go inside. Too much of a small space. Sam went over. "Hey if they don't fit its ok. This is a thrift store. We can try them on at home. He took him over to another section of the store. "Lets see about some new shoes. Those things have seen better days."

He was surprised to see that Bucky was wearing shoes two sizes too small. "Jeez man. We need to get you the right size shoes. Why are you even wearing shoes this small?" He shrugged. "Ok let's fix this. No wonder you are so grumpy." He glared at Sam but his face also seemed to be expressing gratitude despite wanting to kill him. They found some boots and some sneakers in case he wanted to go for a run with Steve and just in case they managed a pair of dress shoes because if he learned anything being around both Tony and Steve it was that formal occasions came without warning. He then moved him over to the media section mostly for fun. Music and movies are a good assessment when getting to know someone.

"I know you have been out in the world for a while any music or movies ya like?" He stared at him. He remained silent so Sam started looking through records and cds. They stood looking through the boxes in silence for a while. "I like Patsy Cline and The Rolling Stones." He looked up surprised by his answer. "Well that sure is a variety there. Both are a little after your time aren't they?" He nodded. "Heard the Stones in a diner shortly after the helicarrier incident. Something about them just stuck." Sam nodded still looking at things. "What about Patsy Cline?" His body language sagged a bit and he blushed. "One of the scientists, KGB, would listen to her while she watched me. She would sing along as she checked on me. I could still hear a lot while in cryo even if I wasn't aware of how long it had been or where I was. She was kind to me. She didn't last long. She was shot for sneaking food to the girls in the Redroom. They shot her down while she worked."

Sam took a breath. "Wow. That's some heavy stuff. So memories aside I get from this that you like classic rock and you like old country. I think you are gonna be ok at the tower. I know for a fact Clint loves old country music. Stark likes rock and roll but I'm not sure you are much of an AC/DC guy. Still couldn't hurt to build that bridge through music." He picked out a few things and they headed for the car. He was surprised they had spent three hours there. He was taking notes of things he saw. They would be helpful when he began to see an actual therapist.

"So do you want to go to a restaurant and eat or go home and eat?" Bucky sat a moment weighing his options. "Home. I dont have spoons for that today." Sam looked at him. "You know the spoon theory?" He gave a short nod. "Princess taught me. I don't have spoons for a lot of things." Sam started the car. "That's ok. It helps me know where we are. Do you have enough spoons to try some new food? There's a great Japanese place with the best sushi. I can pick some stuff up from there and we can take it home." He gave him a sideways glance. "Isn't that raw fish?" He laughed, "common misconception. Most of it is pickled or cooked. Sashimi is raw but I won't make you eat it if you don't want to. That said if you end up liking it maybe I can get Mr. Perfect to try it and stop being a baby about it."

Bucky grinned. "Well all you had to say was Steve wouldn't do it. Hell lets try it." Sam slapped him on the back. "That's the spirit. Let's go all out for this one. A little bit of everything and some Sake to top it off." They stopped at the restaurant and Sam came out with two large bags and a box. He put everything in the back seat and they made their way home. He set everything out and explained what each one was. He showed him how to use chopsticks which he picked up pretty easily. Steve called when they were half way through dinner.

"Hey how goes things with Stark? I got you on speaker we were workin’ on dinner. Your boy can put away some sushi." He could hear Steve go silent on the other end. "He actually tried something new?" Sam laughed. "Yea we had a good day. Went to the thrift shop got some new clothes."
"You know you don't have to feel pressured to do things Buck." He just finished another mouthful. "Not doing anything I don't want. Sam's not some overbearing mother hen. Besides i'm pretty sure if he tried to force me I could end him in three moves or I could just ask him to go jogging." Steve busted out laughing while Sam crossed his arms.

"So it's like that now? You come into my house and insult me after i bought you sushi and new clothes?" Bucky could see he was playing with him. "What can I say i'm not a cheap date Wilson." Even Sam laughed this time. "Fair point. So what did Stark say?" Steve sighed a little. "He and Pepper are working on it. Fury wants him to see a therapist once a week before he's cleared to be anywhere alone. Stark agrees. They are gonna draw up some paperwork to go over with Fury and me. We gotta interview a therapist although Pepper doesnt want someone from S.H.I.E.L.D which i agree with. We are trying to find the person Clint saw but getting through to him when he's at home is hard. It looks promising but complicated. Pepper really helped wear Tony down. I will let you guys get back to dinner. Call if you need me." They said their goodbyes and finished dinner.

Sam was a little surprised that Bucky ate as much as he did. "When was the last time you had a good meal. Be honest with me?" He was quiet for a while as they sat on the couch. "Not sure. Foods complicated. I'm not comfortable with foods that people think I should remember. Too much pressure but I'm also still learning what I like. I eat enough but the whole process is stressful if that makes sense." Sam was making notes. "So I should stick with newer foods?" He nodded. "Yea that seems like a good plan."
"You do realize your calorie requirements are probably pretty high because of the whole super soldier thing right?" He was quiet again. "I know. It's still hard to eat that much. Hydra would force feed me until I was practically sick."

Sam never considered that. "Shit man. You need to communicate this stuff. We can work on that. A nutritionist would be able to help you manage your diet so it doesn't seem forced." He didn't respond to this. He seemed to be taking it all in. They ended up watching a movie before Sam called it a night.

A while later he was awakened to the sound of Bucky getting violently ill in the bathroom. He found him hanging over the bowl looking miserable. "Sushi not agreeing with you?" He looked up, his hair hanging in his face. "Nightmare triggered it I think." He shuddered and began to heave again. Sam winced seeing him in pain. He stayed with him for the next hour until it stopped then Bucky cleaned himself up and got back to bed.

Sam was surprised he was still asleep at 11 the next morning. He figured he was exhausted from being sick. He quietly knocked on the door. There was a bit of grumbling before the door opened. "Doin ok?" He shrugged. "Haven't slept that long in a while." He remembered Steve's note mentioning that two hours of sleep was standard for him. "Well I got some toast for ya downstairs if you want it. Figured we should take it easy on the stomach today. Take your time, I'll be there when you are ready."

He sat down on the bed. Sam was doing so much for him. He was surprised at how patient he was. He knew he was a mess but it didn't seem to bother Sam. He went over to the bag of clothes and pulled out pants and a shirt. The pants were a little snug but not too much. The shirt was a little big but soft and comfortable. He pulled his hair back into a bun and went downstairs. Sam seemed surprised. "Looks good. Pants seem a bit snug but hey if you're good im good. Didn't expect to see you rockin the man bun. Who even taught you that?" He sat down at the table. "Princess taught me. I wasn't comfortable getting a haircut but it was in the way otherwise." He passed him the plate of toast. “Well as long as it’s what you want. Here eat something. How do you feel about going to the zoo today? It’s too nice to stay inside.” He smiled. “I guess that sounds good.”

They finished eating and made their way to the zoo. It wasn’t too crowded but there were still plenty of people. They arrived at the front gate just as an animal encounter was beginning with an orangutan. The zoo keeper was walking her around and explaining that she is too used to people to be placed back in the wild. When they got close to Sam and Bucky the Orangutan was suddenly pulling him down by his metal arm. The keeper was quick to step in. “Its ok she just wants to see you. Every so often she gets really curious about a person.” He was now sitting on the ground face to face with her. “Her name is sweetie. Just sit still and let her get a look at you. She will move on when she’s done.”

Sam had his phone out getting a picture for Steve. He sent it to him and looked back up to see that Sweetie had him wrapped in a hug and was rocking him back and forth as she patted his head. The keeper seemed surprised by this. “Well sweetie I think we need to let this gentleman off the ground.” She nodded and allowed him to stand giving him one last hug before she walked off with the zookeeper. “You good?” He moved over to a bench and sat down. “I haven’t been held like that since my mother. It’s just...weird. I don’t know how to feel right now.” Steve texted back about the picture. “You took him to the Zoo?” He texted back to give Bucky a moment to collect himself. “Yea too nice to stay in the house. You and I need to have some words when I see you next. It’s barely been 24 hrs and I have a lot of information for you guys to work with.” He looked back up to see a little kid investigating Bucky’s arm from the bench next to him. He carefully nudged him. “Ya got a friend.”

He looked over at the kid. “Hi” The boy looked at him and then at his arm. “What happened to your arm?” He could see Bucky stiffen as he thought of a child friendly answer. “I um…lost it in an accident.” The child was still looking at him. “Oh ok. Why is it metal?” He took a deep breath. “Not sure that’s what they gave me.”
“Does it hurt?” he shook his head. “Not anymore it doesn’t” The child’s mother now realized he was “bothering” someone and pulled them away quickly. Bucky stood up. “What else are we seeing today?”

They wandered the zoo for a while looking at the Pandas and the elephants. When they made it to the petting zoo he saw a small smile on Bucky’s face. Sam bought two bags of feed and they walked in. Steve mentioned he was taking care of goats in Wakanda. He just didn’t realize how fond he was of them. He calmly sat on the ground letting them pretty much walk all over him. Sam ended up spending some time sitting outside the petting zoo watching him. One of the keepers came over and sat next to him.

“You seem pretty good with goats.” He smiled as a little one nibbled at his hair that was falling out of the bun. “I used to help raise them till I moved here. They are nice except when they decide to climb up a tree.” She giggled. “I know how that is. We had a tree here for a week or so but we had a few find their way into it but they couldn't find their way down. Every morning we would come in to at least one of the little shits stuck there screaming for help for god knows how long.” They sat and talked about the goats for a while and Bucky finally got up and went over to Sam. He could see him grinning as he met him at the bench. “What’s so funny?”

“You really didn’t see how hard she was flirting with you? Steve said you were the ladies man.” He looked back to where the keeper had been but she was gone off to do other things. “I...she...I screwed that up didn’t I.” He patted the bench. “No you did fine. That was still a nice interaction with a stranger. You have handled them pretty well today. Still I think that Orangutan wanted to full on adopt you.” He chuckled. “Animals see right through ya sometimes. They don’t judge they just go with their gut. I can figure them out a lot better than people.” Sam realized it was getting kinda late. “Hey you ready to get something to eat?” He nodded. “I think maybe I can eat in an actual restaurant today.” They walked back to the parking lot. “Sounds good.”

The next few days were a careful routine of learning what foods he actually ate and things to keep him busy. The nice spring weather made outside activities possible. They went to the cherry blossom festival the day before Steve came back to hopefully get him. In that time he learned that Barnes had nightmares pretty much every night most ended with him getting sick. No wonder he wasn’t gaining weight even if he ate enough it was gone. He also learned that he wasn’t very good at swimming because of the weight of the arm and the parts holding it inside of him. He had noticed his body made adjustments to walk but he had a feeling that there was a lot of pain involved with him moving. When Steve arrived he had six pages of notes for him.

“So Tony said he can come to the tower but he will be seeing a therapist once a week. She will start seeing him on monday.” Sam sat down at the table while Bucky packed his things up. “I got a lot here to show you. He needs a nutritionist. He’s pretty afraid of food. Hydra used to force feed him. He gets physically sick from his nightmares and he is horribly claustrophobic. You need to communicate better with him. He can’t just do nothing. Take small steps. We went to get new clothes but went to a thrift shop rather than a mall. We chose open outdoor activities. I even got him to go to the Matsuri festival yesterday. He’s been wearing shoes two sizes too small because that's what he was given. I know those are the boots he had from hydra but still ya should have checked in on that. This stuff is not to make you feel bad.” Steve scanned the notes. “Can I give them to the therapist?” He nodded “That’s why I did them. You gotta bring him out of his shell without handling him with kid gloves.”

Bucky came down the stairs with his duffle ready to go. He put his hand out for a shake. “Thanks Sam. It’s been fun.” Sam returned the shake. “You remember what we talked about this week. I gave Steve some notes for the therapist nothing we didn't bring up already but feel free to look. I’ll be up sometime soon to visit.” Once settled in the car Steve turned to him. “You ready to go home?” It was a word he was still so unfamiliar with. Home… it sounded nice.