The chill in my bones

The whole way to his farmhouse Clint had been fielding questions from Steve trying not to actually answer any of them with anything more than a You'll understand when We get there which he knew was frustrating to Steve but there wasn't much more he could do or say because it'd just cause more questions and he had enough on his mind and it was one hell of an explanation he didn't want to launch into right now.

As they pulled up outside and got out of the car Steve studied the large house in front of him and he turned to look at Clint who'd told him nothing more than it was somewhere safe that they could hole up for now where they could figure out what the heck was going on and where to go next and there was someone he could ask for help.

"This is home," Clint explained, "At least when I'm not working it is anyway."

When he wasn't too busy with missions anyway which was something he largely tried to avoid, extended time away wasn't on his list of things he particularly enjoyed. He had a life here and a reason to want to come home but he knew that it wasn't always possible which was why he kept the apartment back in New York to begin with.

"It's a beautiful house Clint but how-" Steve started but got cut off midway through his sentence as the door to the house bounced open.

A young boy bounded out of the house and ran at Clint without even looking at Steve throwing his arms around his waist with an excited exclamation of one single word: Daddy!

"Hey kiddo!" Clint replied as he mussed the boys hair, "This is Steve Rogers, Rogers this is my son Ben." 

Steve smiled at the introduction and watched the boy who turned curious eyes toward him almost as though trying to discern something or another which made Steve undeniably curious but he didn't see how a child could help them find Natasha but then Steve's mind wasn't exactly in the right place right now, none of this was a situation he knew how to deal with.

"Clint I don't get how this is supposed to help," he sighed sounding both confused and upset simultaneously. He thought they were supposed to be getting help...

Clint just frowned at him and shook his head.

"Kiddo where's your mom?" Clint questioned choosing that by way of answer to Steve's confusion.

"Inside, she's in her office I think."

Good, she was home. He wasn't overly sure if she was or whether she was in the city and Ben had been left with Katie. Clint gestured toward the house and started to walk inside leaving Rogers very little choice other than to follow him.  He made his way immediately to a room just to the left of the living room, as they stepped inside Clint closed the door behind them as a beautiful blonde woman turned questioning eyes toward the pair.

"Something tells you're not in here to tell me you brought Captain America home for dinner," she frowned as she looked toward Clint.

She was well trained enough to read the situation and she knew by now that whatever had him here like this was probably serious; Bobbi Morse was one of the best trained spies in the world and certainly one of the best that SHIELD had ever turned out though she worked for herself now with her own agency because she hated the bureaucracy that came with being screwed over by a fallen agency and after that she'd had one of two choices: Do something for herself or become a housewife and she was never going to do the latter, she was restless and couldn't stand being civilian.

"Nope," Clint sighed. "Steve this is my wife Bobbi."

Clint had a wife and a child, Clint had a wife and a child which was something Steve and definitely not known before today. It made him realise just how little he knew about him and that had him somewhat saddened. He'd worked side by side with Clint Barton for years now and yet it appeared he knew nothing at all about him.

"How bad is it?" Bobbi questioned guessing the situation must be something bad or Clint wouldn't have brought Steve out here like this, Clint was protective over his family which was why Natasha was the only person that knew about Ben for a damn good reason, it was a dangerous world and the work that they did meant that you made enemies so the things most precious to you were protected at all costs.

Wait, where was Natasha? Ah, that explained a lot. That was why they were here, Bobbi's expression became soft and sympathetic. If Natasha was in trouble it'd explain absolutely everything because she knew that both Steve and Clint cared for her a great deal, hell even Bobbi did. She'd help them and Clint knew it, it was why he'd come home and it was why he'd brought Steve with him.

"Nat went dark side, we need help finding her," Clint muttered sadly, "She's in a bad way Bobs. I wouldn't ask you to get involved in this if-"

"I know," Bobbi interjected with a warm smile. "Tell me what happened and what you know so far."

"We were putting Bucky back into cryostasis, it was what he asked us to do because his um, programming? Was still active and he was worried that if he didn't someone would get hurt by him again, Natasha was there when it happened and it triggered something inside of her that changed who she is into who she was," Steve muttered sadly, "She had a connection to Bucky we didn't know about and what happened to  him was a trigger for something in her mind."

Bobbi looked troubled and her eyes slipped to Clint. She'd already reached in front of her to pick up her tablet and she was flicking through something as she watched the two of them.

"I thought Natasha didn't have any other latent programming? I thought SHIELD had worked through it all years ago?" she queried, "She was supposed to be through it all wasn't she?"

"We didn't think so either, I don't even think she knew... It must've been deeply buried. I didn't have any idea she was even connected to Barnes 'til she flipped out, she beat the crap outta Rogers here, bust my nose... It was bad Bobs. She's out there somewhere and I can't find her," Clint sounded disheartened as he spoke. "I'm worried she's gonna get herself killed."

"So why haven't you asked Barnes for help?" That seemed like an obvious starting point. "Have you spoken to him? I don't know him but I do know that's where I'd start."

"We did," Clint sighed, "He decided to go solo and took off, we've found a couple things along the way but nothing close enough to be able to figure out what she's doing. Well I mean we know some of it but she seems to be on some kinda vendetta or something."

Bobbi became curious then and she tilted her head to the side just a little.

"Vendetta against who?" She had a feeling she already knew. Ah, she nodded her head in understanding then. "She's taking on the people that made her."

That was what made the most sense and both men nodded their heads in response to her question, Bobbi rolled her eyes and she actually laughed. It was what she'd have expected Natasha to do, she'd had her own vendetta not that long ago so she could understand it. It was what she'd have done in Natasha's position too but it was a curious thing, how the hell was Barnes tied to all of this? Who the hell was he? What did she hope to achieve out there? Even Nat had to know that that wasn't going to end well. 

"What's his connection to her? Did you find anything on that before he went rogue?" she pondered, "How do they know each other?"

Clint huffed out a dramatic sigh then and moved to side on the edge of Bobbi's desk which earned him a scornful look but he just smiled at her though it was a sad smile. He hated how little he knew here and that was why - against his better judgment - he was stood here asking his wife to get involved in a mess that included Natasha's past.

"Apparently he knew her back when she was in that place, he trained her or some crap. He was kinda vague on everything," he muttered irately, "Kinda wish I'd punched him, he knocked me the hell out and gave me one helluva headache too."

"Ah," Bobbi nodded in understanding, "That was how you got the concussion, remind me to hit him for that when we do find them."

Clint had been a royal pain in the ass after that but he'd just muttered and grumbled every time she'd asked him what had happened so she knew by now that he'd explain when he wanted to and apparently that was right now. It was mildly annoying that it had taken a literal crisis but whatever, that was hardly important right now.

"Can you help?" Steve looked at Bobbi. "We need to find them, I'm worried."

Naturally so, he had no idea what to expect from either one of them at this point and all he had was questions and uncertainties and he'd discovered quickly that he knew nothing at all about the two people he considered to be his best friends. Natasha had told him that spies lied, they kept secrets and the truth was subjective but he hadn't thought she'd lie to him about anything like this though it made sense he supposed. His own pain was enough she probably thought he didn't need hers too. She'd told him once that she'd had someone out there once but it hadn't been a story she'd been keen on telling so he didn't press it.

"Of course I can," She replied with a certainty to her voice, "I just can't from here, I'll need to go into work so I can access feeds and see if I can contact a few people I know in the area. Can you call Kate to come look after Ben while I go grab some stuff?"

"Sure thing, thanks Bob." Clint smiled as he reached over to hold her hand and give it a gentle squeeze.

"You didn't even need to ask and you know it, she's my friend too. C'mon, lets go track a couple of skilled spies, just a regular Wednesday." She offered a smile as she spoke. She was attempting to lighten the mood even just a little bit, stressing would do none of them any good.

It wasn't how she'd envisioned spending her day but there were worse ways and her friend was in trouble. It was worth it. Steve turned to Clint as Bobbi walked past the two of them and out of the room. He understood now why Clint had fielded his questions and why he hadn't answered anything, he understood now what his reluctance was and why he hadn't wanted to do this unless he absolutely had to. 

"You didn't want her or your son hurt," Steve spoke quietly, he watched Barton nod. "I get it, I'm sorry."

Clint just let out a small laugh and shook his head.

"She woulda kicked my ass if I didn't ask her anyways, you have no idea how much of a pain that woman can be. Don't get me wrong she's the best but honestly she's one of those people that hates being kept in the dark if someone she loves is in danger, Nat is her friend too. She was at our wedding, she's Godmother to Ben, Bob loves Nat too." He shrugged as he reached into his pocket to pull his phone out. "Better call Kate, we got work to do."

It took a good half an hour for Kate to arrive at the house though she received nothing but a quick greeting and an apology followed by an I'll explain everything later I promise from Clint before Clint, Bobbi and Steve left. By the time they reached Bobbi's facility Steve found himself more anxious than he wanted to admit. He remained quiet as Morse perused through the footage she'd managed to locate before a ping on her computer and she tilted her head to the side with a frown. 

"Guys, we have something..." she spoke with a worried tone, "They're in Bosnia."

"What? How do you know that?" Clint questioned with a confused look, "I thought they'd be harder to track than-"

"Natasha's phone is on." Bobbi turned to him, "That was too easy..."

"Way too easy," Clint agreed as he pulled his phone out of his pocket, three words were written on his screen: She's been shot.

"We need to go. Now." He looked alarmed, Bobbi threw him a look that told him she had no objections whatsoever to taking one of the jets, if it got them there fast and safe then she was completely fine with that.

Whatever was going on wasn't good, whatever was going on exactly what he'd feared and that? That scared the hell out of him. What if they got there too late? What if Nat died out there just as he'd worried she would? Steve - once again - was full of questions that he got no answers to as Clint Barton focussed on nothing more than moving his ass to find his best friend.

Texting Clint wasn't something she was going to approve of, he'd gotten the bleeding stemmed and he'd managed to stabilise her or at least he thought he had, they still had plenty of well stocked safehouses and he was glad for that but there was something different about this.

The bullet had been laced with something because she'd been burning up all night and writhing in agony. She could barely move without crying out in pain. His best guess was poison which told him two things; One, they knew that she was going to target that particular facility and Two: There was someone in there that really wanted to hurt her.

Shit. So much for this being her game. Barton could help him reach out to people that could help her and that had been all he was thinking when he'd reached out. He didn't care about absolutely anything else, he didn't care about her being mad at him so long as she was safe and she came out of this alive.

He couldn't even begin to predict the kind of shit that they'd have put into her... Who the hell was this and how the hell did they even know what she'd do or where she'd go? Had she been trailed and hadn't noticed the whole time or did she know and she'd just elected not to tell him through certainty she could handle it herself?

That girl was an enigma so he couldn't be sure about anything. If she had known and she'd taken the risk she was stupid. All he could do though was wait for the cavalry she had sworn she didn't need... Well, she was damn well wrong and it could very well be her own doing, too.

It was a good two hours after his message to Clint that someone made their way inside of their safehouse, he wasn't at all alarmed though because immediately he heard a voice and so he stood and walked out to greet his undoubtedly pissed off visitors. Clint - being Clint and not thinking clearly - swung immediately and punched him in the jaw. Okay, he kind of deserved that. He frowned at Barton and shook his head.

"Feel better now you've got that out of your system?" he questioned with a raised brow, "I did what I needed to do to help her."

Clint let out a humorless laugh despite Steve asking him not to say anything brash.

"Right, good job at protecting her. She got SHOT. You were supposed to keep her safe and you did a shitty job, you shoulda just let us come with you at least then she might not be in this mess!" Clint hissed, he was far from happy and he intended to make that damn well clear, too.

"I didn't let this happen to her!" Bucky argued, "I think she knew someone was tailing her and she underestimated the threat, either that or someone got the jump on her I don't know but what I do know is that the bullet was laced with something. She's been poisoned."

"Shit," Clint pushed past Bucky and knelt beside Natasha as his hand touched her head and he immediately pulled it away, she was burning up. "We need to get her to a hospital!"

Naturally that was his first suggestion, Bucky immediately shook his head though. He knew by now that this wasn't the type of thing that any hospital could help with, they wouldn't use anything that pedestrian or anything that could be treat so easily, they wanted her to suffer and so far they'd gotten their wish.

"It won't be anything they can help with dumbass. We need someone who can help that understands the dark shit we're mixed up in right now, anyone who isn't going to get killed just for trying to help her or me. We need someone who can help us fix this but we can't involve anyone civilian or we'll get them killed, don't be an idiot." No doctor or hospital was going to be able to do a damn thing for her and he knew it.

Hell he bet even Clint knew it he was just desperate and grasping at straws. This situation had gotten way out of hand.

"Aw, hell!" Clint muttered, "Give me a minute."

Pulling his phone out of his pocket, Clint did the exact thing Steve knew he was going to do, the same thing that earned him the sympathetic look Steve currently wore: Call his wife. Bob, we need you out here quick, Tasha's been poisoned. So much for not getting her any more involved than she already was. He turned back to Steve and Bucky.

"Bobs will be here in an hour give or take," he sighed. "Didn't wanna get her more mixed up in this damn mess."

"Who the hell is he talking about?" Bucky questioned as he looked at Steve, his hand rubbing his jaw. "Steve I never meant for any of this mess to happen."

"My wife, she's one of the best biochemists in the world so she's our best shot if you want Nat to survive and you won't trust a damn hospital." He really really did not like Bucky Barnes. "Now you sit your ass down and start talking."

"Alright, alright." Bucky held his hands up before sitting down, he would've argued if not for Steve silently asking him to comply. "What do you wanna know?"

"You and her, what's the deal? Why'd she trust you so far?" Clint sat on a chair and studied him, his eyes occasionally cast toward Natasha.

"We were- Back when we were in that place before she met any of you before she was- Before she was Natasha I trained her. I taught her to survive, I taught her to-" He cut off and sighed, "It doesn't matter what I taught her what matters is that you were right and there was a connection between her and I that I didn't want to talk to you about, I love her. I always have, you asked me if her and I were a thing? Yeah. We were. She was the only thing I ever had that mattered to me." He was reluctant to talk about it and that was evident with the huge sigh that broke his lips.

"She was my- Look that story isn't important okay? She trusts me because she loved me then. She trusts me because she knows I'd rather die than let anything happen to her and that's all you need to know, all you need to know for now is that I'd die before I let her die," he muttered quite obviously growing exacerbated. "You want me to tell you everything and that's not gonna happen. It's her story more than it's mine so just- lets focus on saving her life please?"

Let's focus on saving her life please. God he hoped that they could save her...  She was too stubborn to die though, he sat back and closed his eyes placing his hand over them and he shook his head. He just wanted to hit something, lash out... Hell he just wanted to do anything but sit here. He hated it. 

He'd wasted too many years failing to protect her and noe he was doing it all over again.

Clint - naturally - grumbled about it but what could he do? He couldn't force answers out of someone but he could make a point if showing how irritated he was and he could do that very well. He would've anyway if he wasn't so worried about Natasha.

Dammit Tasha why'd you gotta go get yourself shot for huh? Too damn stubborn.

Always too damn stubborn.